Breaking the Ice Ch. 05

I giggled breathlessly at his overenthusiasm. "Shane, pace yourself. You're not actually going to impregnate me today."

He came on top of me, gentler this time as he kissed my forehead with a cocky smile. "Watch me."

***

"Hello, Tess's eggs. This is your daddy. You know who I am, I talk into your mama's microphone every night." I grinned wildly at the silly man talking into my belly button. "Don't call my vagina a microphone, you weirdo."

"Hush up woman, we're talkin' here." I closed the imaginary lock on my mouth and threw away the key, an easy smile flashed at me as Shane returned his focus. "Okay, here's the deal. You've got some swimmers comin' your way, so I'm gonna need you to hook up with them or eat them or whatever the fuck you gotta do to turn into a baby. Oh, and please don't ruin your mama's vagina on the way out, I'm still using it."

"Oh, that's super classy, thank you." The bed shook while laughter wracked our bodies. When we were done he laid his ear onto my stomach while I petted his hair. "If we have a boy, can we name him Eli?" I asked quietly.

Shane looked up, resting his chin on my belly." I would love that, sweetheart. Dad's gonna love it too. Did I ever tell you my mom was originally gonna name me Elijah Junior? Until Dad had lunch with an old girlfriend when Mom was about eight months along...so out of spite she named me after the guy her parents wanted her to marry. She also threw a cast iron skillet at his head, there's still a dent in the kitchen wall."

I rolled my eyes and smiled, remembering the conversation I'd overheard between Shane and his dad. "Thomas men and their ex-girlfriends, I swear."

"Oh, I don't know. Things with my last ex-girlfriend worked out for the best. Married the chick. Tryin' to get her in a family way. All good stuff." He propped up his elbows, the cute way his sex-tousled hair fell around his eyes giving him a boyish look. "I'm glad we got back together. Thinkin' about it still makes me a little sad, though. I was miserable without you."

"It wasn't exactly a picnic for me either," I lamented, thinking about the three months we'd spent apart.

"Yeah, I know. Especially with your mom dyin', I just wanted to be near you, you know? Instead I..." He sat up suddenly as his face started turning red. "Shit. Never mind."

I looked up at him curiously. "No, what? You cried? Drank yourself silly? Watched a lot of porn? What?"

"Well, kinda, yeah. And," he averted his gaze to anything that wasn't my face as he gripped the back of his neck. "I may have stalked you, a little bit. Not every day or anything, but...sometimes I'd wait for you to come out of the library, or I'd park outside your apartment and every so often I'd get to watch you reading through one of your windows. A couple of nights I slept in my truck just so I could see you leave for class in the mornin'."

I stared at his embarrassed expression for a moment before cracking up again. "Yeah, Shane, I know."

"What do you mean you know?"

"A huge redhead driving a huge truck isn't exactly inconspicuous. Besides, I don't usually make it a habit of studying standing up in my window, I wanted to see you too." I pushed myself up, tucking my legs underneath me. "I think that's why I was so surprised when you finally came to my door."

"Why didn't you say anything? Or, y'know, call me and yell at me to stop?"

"Well I wasn't supposed to know, was I? Besides," Sighing, I leaned into him as he curved his arms around my body. "If I had called you to yell at you I would have kept calling just to talk, and I really wasn't ready. We don't really do things half-way with each other - everything is sudden and consuming and as much as I love that about us I needed a break from the intensity for a while to sort my stuff out."

Shane brought one of his hands up and began stroking my hair. "You could have just told me that."

"I did. You're just stubborn."

"Can't argue with that, sweetheart." He bent over me and kissed the top of my head. "Just promise me next time you go through some traumatic life event, let me go through it with you."

"I'm hoping not to go through any more, but I promise. I think we're getting better though, we got through the Carrie thing pretty well. Speaking of which -"

"No." I glanced up at his stern face. "No, Tess."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't feel like fightin' with you today."

Sitting back up, I placed my hands on the shoulders of my irritated husband. "We're not going to fight, it's not that kind of question. Besides, Dr. Owen said we need to talk about this kind of stuff."

"You know good and goddamn well that was not what he was talking about," Shane huffed as he crossed his arms. "What is your fascination with my ex-girlfriend?"

"Ex-wife," I corrected him as he rolled his eyes, "And my question is more about you, it just happens to involve her in the process. I've never had another boyfriend, I don't have a frame of reference for this kind of stuff." His eyes traveled to my mouth as I bit the corner of my bottom lip. "I'll let you spank me afterwards, if you want."

He tugged my lip out of my mouth with his thumb before crossing his arms again. "I'm gonna do a hell of a lot more than just spank you if you piss me off, so watch it."

"Okay," I gave him a kiss on the cheek as he scowled at me, "So, she was your first girlfriend, and your first wife. Other than her, you just kind of slept around with a bunch of random chicks."

His frown deepened. "Get to the point, Contessa."

"I am, stop growling at me," He conceded and relaxed his defensive posture, dropping his arms and reaching for my hand instead. I stroked his thumb with mine as I continued, "So you're not the type to just fall for anyone, that's clear. Like, the girl would have to be something kind of special, right? I guess I'm wondering...I'm wondering if you loved her like you love me. Not in a quantitative sense, I know you love me more, but...was it as deep with her? Were you as possessive with her as you are with me?"

His eyes stayed glued to mine as he thought about his answer. After what seemed like an hour he finally replied, "Yes, and no." I waited a moment for him to elaborate. "It's...look, that's just how I am, Tess. I'm an all-or-nothin' kind of guy. She was the only girl other than you I've been in love with, and I was young, so...yeah. It was deep, and meaningful, and I loved her a lot, okay? But here's the difference," He tucked my hair behind my ear with his free hand before brushing my cheek with his fingertips, "When she cheated and we got divorced, it really, really hurt; but when you left, it fuckin' killed me. It felt like I was bein' ripped apart on the inside, and that is a feeling I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. So, yeah, I loved her. But I need you. Do you get what I'm sayin'?"

I kissed his knuckles before setting his hand down. "Wait here a second," I scrambled off the bed and went to the closet, reemerging with a large unmarked stationary box. Reclaiming my original spot next to him, I handed him the box and he raised his eyebrow at me in silent question. "Okay, so, I kind of stole the idea from The Notebook, which I watched on a loop pretty much the whole time we were apart."

He opened the lid slowly, setting it aside while he picked out one of the hundreds of index cards scattered inside the cardboard. "Sometimes I'd sit for an hour and just write down every thought in my head, sometimes I'd just write something random or funny that made me think of you," I explained. "I know I'm the one who ended it, but I agonized over it every minute we were apart. Even if you weren't in my life, I always thought about you, and I missed you like crazy. I could never be happy if we weren't...trust me Shane. If someone needs anyone, I'm the one who needs you."

For a few minutes we sat in silence while he read some of the cards. Sometimes he'd smirk reading my musings, other times his face would hold a slight sadness at my words. When he got to the longest note, which was written front and back on ten large index cards stapled together, he finally put the box to the side and looked at me. "You love me," he stated quietly.

"Well, yeah. That's kind of why we're married."

He shook his head. "No, I mean...it's one thing to hear you say it, but this...you love me. This...this is you. This is raw, uncensored...this is you."

A nervous smile crept onto my face. "It's too late to divorce me now that you know how crazy I am."

Tossing the stack of cards on the night stand, he pushed on my stomach gently until I was flat on my back. Bending his face down, he stared at my face with a dominating gleam in his eye. "You want to see how possessive I am of you, Contessa?" he asked with a sharp tone in his voice.

I let out a shaky laugh. "I think I already know, Shane."

"Hmm, you think you do?" He gave me brief kiss before pulling away.

"Let's go take a shower."

***

"Shane." My lower back tightened in response to his movements, the shower wall wet with condensation as I tried to steady myself.

"Shhh." Shane quieted me as he slipped his cock further into my ass, the foreign sensation making me hold my breath. "That's it. Take all of me, sweetheart."

"I can't...you're so big," I exhaled in a rush, rubbing at the dampness of my pussy as my head dropped forward against the warm tile. "You're the only...I've never...oh God, you feel so good..."

"Shhhh," Shane scolded. I felt the cheeks of my rear connect with his pelvis as he stilled, whispering intensely into my ear. "Tess, if you keep saying those things I'm going to end up fucking the hell out of you before you come, and I need you to be relaxed so I don't hurt you. So shut up and just come for me."

He wrapped one hand around my mouth as the other gripped my waist, holding me in place as his rigid member slowly slid in and out of my last virgin hole. I slipped two fingers inside my pussy, mewling softly at how full I felt. When I began climaxing, my muscles contracting around my fingers and his cock, his hand dropped from my mouth and flew over my clit. "Come for me again."

My second orgasm followed quickly, my skin too hot from being filled so completely and the steam from the shower. "Come again, Contessa." I cried out as he lifted my leg and pinned it into the wall, opening my body up further for him. He replaced my fingers with three of his, tissues tightening around his digits as he fucked my sensitive anus with sharp thrusts. "Again," he shouted.

"I can't! Shane...please..." My whimpering noises grew louder as he rhythmically fucked me with his fingers, cock firmly in my ass. The pressure in my lower belly overflowed and I wailed hoarsely as I started squirting my juices all over his hand.

"Oh fuck, yes, that's it..." My pleasure taken care of, he took what he wanted from my body to help with his own. He slid my ass up and down his cock exhaustingly, fucking me with loud grunts. "My dirty fucking...good girl..." I felt him swell inside me, gruffly shouting out every expletive that spilled across his lips as he came. He didn't linger when he was done, slowly pulling himself from my holes as he caught me by the waist to keep me from slumping over. He kissed the back of my shoulders, my neck. "Good girl, I love you, you're such a good little girl," he whispered into my skin over and over as I gasped silently from the intensity of it all.

***

"You okay, sweetheart?" Shane asked quietly. We were sitting on opposite ends of the couch in our bathrobes, sharing a thick blanket while staring at the roaring flames in the fireplace. Austin's jingly ball he was wrestling with had been the only sound to fill the space since we'd cleaned up and left the shower. I flashed him a huge grin and poked him with my toes. "My butt hurts."

He slapped his hands over his face while he roared with laughter. "Jesus, woman, you're gonna be the death of me." When he recovered he lowered his hands, reaching under the blanket to massage my foot. "Seriously though. Did I go too hard?"

I snuggled into the blanket further. "I'm sore, but it was good. Really, surprisingly good actually. I might need a day or so before we resume our regular activity, though, it's been a particularly exerting twelve hours."

He nodded slightly, pressing the heel of his hand into my arch. "Let's just relax tomorrow. I've been kinda rough with you today." He grew quiet, thoughtful. "I've never wanted a girl as much as I want you, it drives me crazy."

"Good, because you're stuck with crazy for the rest of your life." I smiled, trying to ease his mind.

"Lucky me." He kissed my ankle bracelet before lying back and relaxing. We spent the rest of the night intrinsically wrapped up in our own little world.