Brenda and Connie Ch. 12

The Linda Porter-Walter Snyder romance which started during the Thanksgiving week progressed into a steamy, burning torrid relationship; in other words hot! After that initial Saturday night the two of them went to Linda's apartment in Grand Rapids. Walter made excuses to his parents so that he did not get to their place until Wednesday night, being the eve of the holiday. Linda had to go to work the Monday morning for three hours to fulfill a work assignment commitment but she was then able to arrange for time off for the rest of the week. So for that time period of Sunday to Wednesday with the exception of Linda going briefly to work on the Monday, they fucked like rabbits continuously. They just could not get enough of each other.

After the Thanksgiving weekend Linda went to Chicago the next Friday. She got off early so she arrived at 6:30 Chicago time at the designated restaurant arranged for their meet. Linda had a wonderful night. The Italian restaurant served an excellent meal. They went dancing afterwards and Linda was thrilled. She was experiencing an honest to goodness date like a normal girl. Her man was paying attention to her and was acting like he actually liked her. In fact if she wasn't so unsure of her own desirability, she would swear he cherished her.

These were foreign feelings for Linda and it was proving to be a heady experience. She was thinking to herself that this was her first authentic date of her life. To be sure, throughout the years guys have asked her out for a date like a movie, dinner, drinks at a bar etc. However because of her reputation as a slut and a whore, her dates' main if only intention was to get into her pants with no interest to discover anything about her as a person. If anything Linda always had the impression that her dates inexplicably despised her and took pains not to be seen in public with her.

The males' general public aversion to her was brought home to her when she found herself with no date for her high school senior prom. Despite being an undeniable good looking and gorgeous female who would fuck when you dated her, no guy asked her out on such an auspicious occasion for fear of being publicly romantically linked to her. Basically the guys at her high school were willing to admit having fucked her but would never be caught dead in being identified as having a regard for her; after all she was the school's whore and somehow one's manhood is lessened if one displayed a weakness for her charms.

Not willing to miss out on her senior prom she accepted the invitation to go to the prom with her best and only friend, Rhonda Rivers. Rhonda was a lesbian and that date with Linda fulfilled her dreams. However for Linda it was galling to her mind that as the school's whore the only date she could attract was the school's lesbian. She had never felt more humiliated or humbled in her life. At least Linda experienced her first lesbian sex. It was satisfactory as she recalled but nowhere as exciting or as thrilling as her night with Brenda and Connie.

Walter was also enjoying the evening and this date. He had already fallen in love with Linda although he had not consciously acknowledged it to himself. He believed that Linda was the sharpest and wittiest girl he had ever encountered. He was absolutely enthralled in her company. He had such a good time with her that the incredible sex he had enjoyed with her was simply a bonus. The sex with Linda was without a doubt the best sex he ever had but that in of itself would not have induced him to seek to establish a long term relationship with her. It was her personality that made him love her.

His only issue with her was her promiscuous past. It was not that he begrudged her sexual past nor was he burdened by a typical male jealousy that could not tolerate a wild sexual history of their girlfriends. No, his problem was the fear that because Linda was used to having so many lovers in the past, that she would soon tire of him and seek other new loves to conquer.

To counter these unhappy speculations, Walter did truly believe that Linda was not a slut and a whore. Her past promiscuity could be attributed as her reaction to the horrendous sexual abuse she suffered as a child from her monstrous uncle. She probably acted out sexually to preserve her sanity and to block out the memory of the horrors inflicted on her.

Walter appreciated the courage and trust Linda had placed in him by confiding her secrets to him; secrets she had not revealed to anyone including her sister, Brenda. It was a testament to her strength of character that apart from her promiscuity, Linda was able to function with a cheerful disposition. He was also impressed that she was able to accept the responsibilities of her actions. She did not complain that people taunted her for her sluttish behavior and she did not let society's censure affect her livelihood. From their conversations Walter could discern that Linda in her job as a paralegal was superbly competent at what she did.

In truth the only real concern he had about Linda was her belief of her culpability in the sexual abuse she had endured. That notion was what Walter believed was the impetus of her promiscuity. He was sure that with professional help Linda could rid herself of her demons and become whole. Once she was truly well she would be happy in a monogamous relationship; i.e. with him. Thus for partly selfish reasons he was determined to insist she seek out the services of a psychologist or a psychiatrist.

Because of their private thoughts both Linda and Walter were determined to achieve the ultimate sexual satisfaction for their partner that weekend. Each believed that sexual success would be the cement that would bound them into an exclusive relationship. They each wanted a permanent relationship but each thought the other was not so inclined.

Thus, when they entered Walter's apartment they embraced and engaged in a frantic kissing frenzy. They held each other tightly as their tongues were dueling while switching from mouth to mouth. The kissing ushered in a euphoric sensation seeping into their brains. For Linda she felt like she was levitating since she no longer was feeling anything solid under her feet. In fact the only solid thing she did feel was his burgeoning cock pressing against her body. She gasped loudly when she became aware of his erection. Her hand automatically slipped to grasp it and she sighed when she made contact. Also automatically she caressed that magnificent cock through his pants, reveling in the realization that soon it will be putting out the fire raging in her cunt.

The feeling of his cock in her hand increased her heartbeat. Her hormones began agitating and as a result her excitement soared. Although the prolonged kissing was an activity that she could never tire of, the cock in her hand pushed aside other desires and compelled her to seek changing the course of their lovemaking. She broke off the kiss and with a shriek she dropped to her knees. She frantically fumbled at his pants opening, her excitement preventing her from being efficient which made her even more frantic.

Eventually she did get his cock freed and happily she got it into her mouth. The first feeling of his cock in her mouth was relief as her need for performing fellatio was satisfied. In some ways the feeling was akin to relief one feels when one starts to urinate after having experienced for some time an urgent need to pee. When the relief feeling had run its course, a new feeling replaced it. The new feeling was one of pure joy and Linda was grunting as evidence of her joy. Her joy in her mind was so complex that her grunting sound resembled more of an animal in heat than a feminine human grunt.

Most females normally have a neutral attitude about giving head. Their main enjoyment is derived from discerning that their action was pleasing their lover. If their lover does not ejaculate after a reasonable amount of time, the activity becomes tedious and laborious for the woman. In such cases no pleasure ensues for the woman and instead she is left with grumbling about her sore jaws.

Linda's attitude for fellatio was different. She actually enjoyed having a cock in her mouth and was thrilled with such feeling. She often experienced an actual orgasm from giving blow jobs. Curiously almost all of the guys were disgusted when she did have an orgasm in such cases. Most guys being accustomed to non orgasms by other females when giving head, came to the conclusion that Linda's enjoyment proved her reputation of a slut or a whore.

Walter though, having a genuine belief that Linda was worthwhile and was not really a slut and a whore, appreciated Linda's authentic enjoyment of giving head. This realization of Linda's joy actually trumped his own physical pleasure of the feel of Linda's tongue and lips on his cock.

The ecstasy each was experiencing did not prevent each of them to remove their clothes during the blow job. Considering Linda's extensive past sexual history, the logistics of getting herself naked while continuing giving head presented no problem. However, Walter was no slouch in undressing himself either. So when Walter started ejaculating in Linda's mouth they were both totally naked.

When Walter reached his climax, Linda was also experiencing an orgasm as evidenced by her strange and very loud noises she was making as she was gleefully swallowing his sperm. He was in the highest state of euphoria than he had ever been in. When he finished spurting and as Linda was licking his cock completely clean, he remained fully hard.

Aware of his intact erection, Walter emitted an animalistic cry of lust. He picked up Linda off the floor forcibly expelling his cock from her mouth. The erotic pleasures that were coursing throughout his body temporarily strengthened him beyond normal standards. He was able to carry Linda, with her feet off the floor, by holding her only at the waist straight up. When he reached his bed he flung her on to it. As she landed flat on her back he jumped on her and entered her to commence the most frantic sexual intercourse he had ever participated in.

Linda reacted without any objection or surprise. Instead as soon as Walter had impaled her she wrapped her legs completely around him. She was grunting as loudly and in unison with his animalistic cries. She was moving her hips with the same sense of urgency as he was doing while pumping his cock in her. She was raking his back with her nails drawing blood. When their mutual orgasms arrived, the noises of joy each made were deafening. Luckily for Walter his nearest apartment neighbors happened to have been away or no doubt there would be protests demanding quiet. When they were finished their bodies were completely drenched from their sweat.

Without a doubt this was the most incredible sexual experience for Walter, and it was likewise the same for Linda. The rest of the sex throughout that weekend was not as frantic but it was just as satisfactory. By the time Linda had to leave both knew without a doubt that there was something special going on between them.

After that weekend in Chicago, pursuant to Walter's suggestion, which was more like a demand, she did contact a psychologist and set up some therapy sessions. She chose a Dr Sylvia Zorn whom she had come to know from her job as a paralegal. Linda was pleasantly surprised that her sessions with Dr Zorn proved to be highly beneficial. Because she had an ebullient personality and believed herself to be self assured, Linda was shocked to discover that she actually had low esteem issues.

As Dr Zorn pointed out how else can it be explained that she had had sexual intercourse with all kinds of losers; guys clearly inferior to her. Not only did she have sex with them but she allowed herself to be humiliated by them. This pattern of behavior had a devastating snowball effect in assessing her self worth. The more abuse she tolerated from these lousy lovers the more disgusted she felt with herself. In turn the guys lost any respect for her and heaped more abuse at her. She was so afraid of being deprived of having any sexual action, that she continued lowering the bar of what she would not tolerate. The lack of a male date for her senior year high school prom was the natural consequence of her compromise of her self esteem.

Obviously the sexual abuse she suffered as a child by her monstrous uncle was the root cause of her misery. The fact that she could not recall the exact circumstances of the ongoing abuses she had endured was most likely her body's self defense method to preserve her sanity. Linda marveled that Dr Zorn's professional opinion mirrored Walter's layman's intuition; this observation made her love Walter even more.

It would be possible under hypnosis for Linda to recall all the details of the sexual depravity she had been subjected to. However Dr Zorn could not recommend Linda undergo such measures as it would interfere with the natural healing process. In any case delving into what had actually happened with her uncle would not advance the recovery of her mental health. Instead Dr Zorn wanted to focus on that aspect of Linda's damaged psyche that could be repaired by therapy.

Dr Zorn's analysis identified the relevant source of Linda's personality disorder to be her belief in her culpability to the sexual abuse. It is all well and good for Linda to acknowledge consciously and intellectuality that she understood that she was a victim and had no responsibility in the sexual abuse she had suffered. However the human brain is a complex organ and her uncle's self exculpatory excuses that Linda enjoyed and desired the illegal sexual activity certainly had a remarkable effect on her outlook. It was definitely the driving force that caused Linda to pursue the self destructive promiscuous behavior, and she did so seemingly to confirm the correctness of her uncle's vile assertions.

However paradoxically, she needed to act out as a slut and a whore as it was the only mechanism she had to rid herself of the demons and the despondency she felt when contemplating what had happened to her as a child. After the death of her abuser, it was actually less painful for her to believe that what had happened to her was a natural consequence of her being immoral rather than believing that she was a victim. Thus to sustain that more soothing thought it was imperative for her to be promiscuous of her own free will.

Assuming such premise to be true, Dr Zorn was of the opinion that Linda had misinterpreted her overwrought weeping reaction upon seeing her sister's disfigured face after the accident. Linda believed that she was envious of Brenda's misfortune because it meant the uncle would not pursue Brenda and she cried because she deemed it was a selfish and ignoble feeling on her part.

The point that Linda was missing was that she was cognizant that having been abused by her uncle since she was six years old that he would start turning his attentions to Brenda as well once she had turned six. Thus if not for the accident the only way Brenda could have been saved from her uncle's predatory aggressiveness was if Linda could ignore her passive acquiescence to her uncle's despicable sexual demands. If instead she made herself the active instigator to their horrid sexual contacts then perhaps her uncle would be so enthralled with her that he would ignore Brenda. This naturally put Linda in a catch-22 of misery. If she was successful there was no denying her sexual depravity but if she was unsuccessful then she had failed to protect her younger sister.

Yes Dr Zorn conceded that such sophisticated reasoning would be consciously beyond Linda's capabilities as a child of eight years. However instinct and intuition could certainly play a part in influencing her feelings at the time. So her crying could be interpreted as an instinctive feeling of relief that she would not be called upon to act as protector of her sister. Her instincts would further suggest that such a relief was ignoble which in turn prolonged her crying jag. As a girl of eight years of age she could not possibly have come to such conclusions. Instead she reached a more child like perspective which in turn became a permanent belief. As Dr Zorn summed it up:

"You know Linda, you should be proud that as a child of just eight years of age you already subscribed to your duty to protect your sister. The relief you felt was a subconscious awareness of what you had to do to save your sister and the realization that you need not do it after all. If you recognize that now, then you can also take the next step of dispelling any feeling of guilt. Just think of this as an example: all agents of the Secret Service assigned to protect the President are prepared to die in their duty but I am sure they do not feel guilty but are instead happy when they end their duties alive. And just remember agents are paid to protect the President but you were prepared to protect your sister out of love and sense of duty."

"You should also be proud that you never told your sister about your situation and suggest that in some respect she was fortunate to have her face disfigured. A spiteful and bitter person would have done just that with the result of causing your sister to endure even more misery. I also get the impression that apart from crying uncontrollably upon initially seeing her disfigured face you have never made a fuss about it or made her feel uncomfortable."

Linda replied:

"Well obviously Brenda is unhappy with her misfortune, who wouldn't be? But it's not like she was born disfigured. She's not a monster, but in fact is a great girl. Anyone who is put off by her face is a loser as far as I am concerned. Anyway it appears that Brenda now has a real stud for a boyfriend; actually he is the quarterback for the Rose Bowl bound MSU team. I sure look forward to meeting him eventually."

"Well that's nice for your sister to be sure; but enough about her. I do believe we will not require too many sessions to transform you into the truly confident, self assured young woman that you were meant to be. Of course it helps that you have a great boyfriend who is not alarmed or disturbed by your promiscuous past. He sure sounds like a keeper."

"Yes he is. I have not been interested or tempted to be with any other guy since I've met Walter."

"Good! Well I am going to give you some homework assignments that will help bolster your ego and make you feel good about yourself. I predict you will be more inundated with guys hitting on you as they come to realize that you have become unavailable."

Accordingly, Linda's therapy sessions with Dr Zorn proved to be most fruitful. With the guidance and exercises provided by the psychologist, Linda's self esteem grew exponentially. The main beneficiary to Linda's mental health recovery was Walter. Cognizant of Walter's initial perspective and his gentle insistence of her seeking professional help, made Linda absolutely grateful for his love. Instead of being ashamed of her sluttish past, Linda was determined to utilize her experience and knowledge to provide the ultimate mind blowing sex for Walter.

Linda sensed that Walter cherished her, and with the help of Dr Zorn's consultations she was able to accept and acknowledge Walter's love for her as genuine. Consequently the torrid relationship between the two evolved into the rare kind of love for all ages that poets rave about in their scribblings.

At Christmas time, they each introduced their parents to each other. Although by that time, they had known each other only a month their parents easily discerned the chemistry between them. All four of the parents based on their observations of them believed that by the next Christmas they would be a married couple. Linda's mother was particularly overjoyed with Walter and his partiality towards Linda. Since she was well aware of her daughter's promiscuity she had long ago despaired of Linda ever having a serious relationship with a decent man.