Brenda & Ian Ch. 03

They arrived a little after noon and Janet answered the door. She let them in and gave Ian a hug. "I'm very glad you came, Ian." She turned to Brenda, "And you, too." She left Ian and hugged Brenda. It wasn't her usual one second, barely touch her hug. It was almost a motherly hug, one that lasted a while. It reminded Brenda of hugs that her own mother used to give her and she liked it. She stepped away from Brenda and said, "He's in the study waiting for you."

Ian took her hand and they followed his mother to the study. Adrian had his back to them when they entered. When he heard them enter, he turned around abruptly. "Ian, Brenda, do come in. Please." They stepped into the study as Adrian came around from behind his desk. He didn't know how close he should get so he stayed near it and let them decide how close they wanted to be. They stopped a few feet inside the entrance and eyed him warily, not knowing what to expect.

Adrian cleared his throat as an awkward silence filled the large room. Adrian gestured to them, "Can I get you a refreshment? Water? Anything?" They both shook their heads without speaking.

Adrian nodded and looked down at his hands. "I really don't know where to begin. I really didn't expect you to come, to tell you the truth. If you hadn't come, I would have understood completely." He looked at Ian. "You're looking good, Ian. Brenda must be a good cook."

"She is," Ian said quietly. Brenda scowled at the compliment.

"There's a few things I need to say," he began. "I'm not the same person I was a few months ago. I really don't know who I was back then and I definitely don't like that person. I've been through anger management counseling and I can say that I am a changed man, a better man. Some definite good has come from this. I've decided to go into semi-retirement." Ian raised his eyebrows in surprise. "It's time for your mother and I to enjoy ourselves and to get reacquainted. We plan to travel for fun and not for business. I want to see all of the things that I missed when I went overseas on business."

Adrian moved a few steps forward and stopped. "Ian, I've realized how much my family really means to me. I know I've been hard on you and I'm sorry for that. I didn't have much of a childhood and I didn't learn much from my father. That's no excuse, but it's all I know. Perhaps I can do better in the next few years. I really am proud of you, although I'm still not sold on you being a vet. You and your mom mean a great deal to me. I, I really don't know what I'd do without either of you."

He looked back at his hands. "About what happened before. I know I can't ask you forgiveness. I don't deserve it from either of you. I can't forgive myself for it. It was hateful and disgusting and I wish it never happened. I can only say that I'm sorry. I know it doesn't mean much after all of the things that I've said and done in the past, but I do mean it."

Adrian looked up and addressed Brenda. "I don't know what to say to you. You are everything that I would ever want in a daughter-in-law. It's still very hard for me to not think of you as my niece. I can only hope that with a little time and patience, maybe I'll warm to the idea. Perhaps a grandchild would help that along." He smiled slightly at his joke. Brenda kept a stoic expression on her face.

"Anyway," he said, "know that I want to see more of you. I will continue to go to my counseling sessions so I can work on some other issues and I will not quit until I have the answers and I can turn my life around."

"Well," Ian said, "I'm glad to hear that. I hope that everything works out for you. You deserve a rest after all of the years you've put in."

Brenda remained silent, trying to decide whether or not Adrian was indeed changed. He seemed sincere and straight forward and she wanted to believe him, but she was still wary.

Ian knew that it would take a long time before he could trust him again completely, but this was a start, a new beginning for them and he was glad to be on civil terms with him. It wasn't going to be an emotional reunion; they weren't that type of family. But in their own way, Adrian received the forgiveness he sought. It wasn't instantaneous and it wasn't quick, but it came little by little and Adrian could accept that.

Epilogue

The sun shown brightly that summer morning as Ian and Brenda strolled through the shady cemetery. They came there often since he died. They had hoped so much that he could see his first grandchild before he passed, but it wasn't meant to be. Ian rubbed her swollen stomach lovingly as they came to the grassy area near his grave.

Ian placed fresh flowers on his grave as he silently wished for him to be alive again. Ian knew how much he was looking forward to the new addition and he fought gamely to overcome the cancer that eventually destroyed him. He was a true fighter to the end. Ian brushed aside the tears as he stood up and squinted at the sun.

Brenda missed him, too. They had made their peace and he eventually accepted her lovingly as his own daughter and had forgotten that she ever was anything but. It took quite a while, just as he had predicted, but she never regretted forgiving him. It was ironic that she was the one with him when he took his last breath, or perhaps it was fitting since she had been through it before. The last thing he did was smile at her and close his eyes. He looked so peaceful and Brenda was thankful that he was out of pain.

The baby kicked and startled Brenda out of her thoughts. The life cycle continued.