Can He Take It? Ch. 01

They then asked me about my limits, I said yes to all female contact, no to all male and yes to all bondage and I said I could take lots of pain, but not the maximum amount. When they asked to write in my limits, I felt real ballsy and typed "not applicable"

Finally they wanted 3 pictures. Full front and back, nude of course, and face. I decided to do it. Fuck it. So I got out my camera and set a timer and positioned myself in front of a white wall and stood arms at my side, dick limp as the camera shot me. I turned around and did the same and then I held the camera away from my face and smiled, getting my face shot.

The pics were fine I suppose. I mean I was kind of short, 5'8'', on the skinny side, kinda pale from living in the cold north east, especially during winter like now. My dick was pretty average at best, I don't really know, but it was certainly below average for a porn star I'm sure. I'd never considered these to be problems in my day to day life, and as I thought about the guys in the scenes they were a mix of people, some were built similar to me, so I figured these pictures were just fine.

I looked at my pictures, me staring back totally nude and was hit with a big shot of uncertainty, I looked worried and scared in my self photos, and may be that me was right. I mean this pictures were very obviously me. I was worried about having naked pictures of myself on the internet for obvious reasons, especially attached to my real name. After much deliberation and reading their privacy statement I uploaded the pictures and submitted my application.

With a strange feeling of anticipation and excitement I lay in bed a long time running many fantasies in my head before I finally feel asleep.

Of course, about a week later I got an email that was from the website, making sure to keep my expectations in check before I started to read it, I opened it. They said they were interested in having me come to a preliminary interview where I would be considered for a shoot..

The problem was they were located in San Francisco, and I needed to be there to be considered. In fact, in order to get there it would cost more than $500 for flight, food and room. Especially twice, once for interview and once for the shoot, and I didn't have a lot of money, as a student I was basically broke.

I thought hard about that email for the next day or so and then emailed them back. I said "I won't be in San Francisco much longer, after the preliminary interview, if it's a success do we film?" One of the stipulations was that you had to be around San Fran to do the shoot, so I didn't want to say I was from out of town.

The email was answered quickly, by a girl who sounded very nice:

"Hey Tom:

To be honest the preliminary interview is more of a formality, we'll ask you a few questions and make sure you know exactly what you are getting into. If you're cool with it, we do it because some back out.

We'll discuss what you like and don't like and arrange what the shoot will consist of scene wise.

After that we can schedule the shoot that same week, sometimes in the next day or two.

If you have any more questions please let me know.

Nicole"

I then realized how I could do this shoot. I'd been thinking of the perfect shoot for days in my head, having watched maybe 100 of these I knew them well.

While now was not the time to discuss that, I made my pitch, if this was accepted I promised myself I'd be in, if not I'd be out.

"Thanks for the quick response Nicole.

That sounds great. I am excited to do this. I have one condition though and I know it's kind of a big deal. I want to do this one time and then never again...at least that's what I say now.

But I was hoping to protect my anonymity. So can I wear a face mask? Even like an eye mask like Robin wears in the Batman shows.

I also wanted to discuss waiving my fees, in the hopes of using that money to hire a second girl, and if not I would simply waive the fee in exchange for wearing the mask.

This isn't a job for me, it's living out a fantasy.

Thanks, Tom"

Nicole wrote back quickly:

"I will have to go up higher on this one. I'll get back to you within a day I hope. "

I didn't sleep much at all the night. Not getting an outright no was great news, they were considering it! Also, I was conflicted, I also was kind of hoping they'd say no, because then I'd be off the hook without saying I tried my best within reason.

The next morning Nicole had wrote back and I braced myself for it.

..she said it was OK! I had to consent to working for free, in which case they were fine with working with the small mask. She explained they got a lot of requests, from fans, and from potential amateur submissives to do something like this and I was going to be the first timer. She said I was in the right place at the right time so to speak.

I instantly felt dread hit the pit of my stomach, but also an eager excitement. Perhaps this is how someone feels preparing to bungee jump.

I had told myself I was committed and I wouldn't back out, so I emailed Nicole and we set up an interview for early 2 weeks from now, this gave me time to set up a flight and accommodations, while only missing a few days of school .

I wasn't sure, otherwise, how to prepare for being in a bondage porn. I imagined it was going to be rough, so should I try being extra hard on myself, or should I leave it alone to be in the best shape as I could. I also thought the more I learned and tried now, the less new and exciting the experience would be then. I wanted my mind blown.

I basically got my biggest dildo in me every few days and held its widest part at my asshole, letting it stay there for a while, I tried to slide extra fingers in as well, but it was too tight, or perhaps just too awkward. I figured this would keep my at my best current condition, nothing new, but I wouldn't have regressed.

Other than that I just imagined all the different scenes we could do: Most shoots are in 4 parts. One is generally heavy bondage and whipping or electrical stuff, one is about pleasuring the women mainly, one is always about getting ass fucked with a strap on and the 4th could be anything really. I'd imagine what my fourth would be, I was hoping to break the mold somewhat from what they usually did. I was really hoping I could get it as close to my way as possible.

Finally the day came, the night before I had flown into SanFran and checked into a hotel, getting a good night's sleep.

The next day I went for the interview. The place was kind of out the way, a plain building in an industrial type area. It looked like they were in a warehouse basically. I went in the door, it was unlabeled except for its street numbers. Inside it looked much more normal, there was a regular business type lobby, the site name was in big letters behind a secretary. Maybe it was Nicole?

"Hello," the girl said, she didn't seem to be expecting me.

"Hi..uhh, I'm hear for a 1 o'clock interview."

"Ok, with whom?"

"I'm not sure. I was talking through email with a Nicole. It's about being a performer in a movie." That felt so fucking weird to say.

"You a male submissive?"

"Hmm, yes." She smiled knowingly, did she sense it by my nerves, passive demeanor?

"Ok, I'm sure it's with Dan then, hold on."

She called someone and then smiled sweetly at me, "Go on in, 2nd door on your left. It says Dan Greder on it."

"Thanks a lot."

"Have fun." she said with a mischievous smile.

I knocked on Dan's door and heard a female voice. "Come in."

There was a man in a shirt and tie sitting at a large desk and a women, dressed businesslike as well, with a blouse and mid length skirt, sitting on a bookshelf to his left. Her legs crossed, causing her skirt to ride up a bit, as my eyes moved to her toned bare leg briefly.

"Tom?" she said with a smile as they both looked at me as I cautiously entered.

"Yes, hi."

"Hey, it's Nicole, we talked through email." She got off the shelf and came towards me.

"Hey, how are you?"

"Great, have a seat."

I first shook both their hands and then sat down as the man said "Ok, Tom, you can call me Dan, by the way, this is my assistant Nicole and she's going to sit in on the interview if that's ok?"

"Sure." Nicole hoped back on the bookshelf, she appeared at home there.

"Great, ok let's get started."

"Excellent."

"OK, first off, did you read all our waivers and site rules, etc?"

"Yes I did."

"And you are willing to comply with it all fully?"

"Of course."

"Ok, and also you are only interesting in doing a shoot for our male sub site, as a sub, a straight sub, and only if you are wearing a mask?"

"That is correct."

"And you will waive your performance fee?"

"Yes, I will."

"Alright, I don't hear that often."

"Well like I discussed with Nicole, I'm in this as an experience. I have no interest in a future in porn...well as a performer at least. You guys look like you're living pretty well on this side."

That made them both laugh and then Nicole spoke. "Ok, so why don't you tell us about what you like and don't like in terms of things we would do on a shoot."

"Is there a list, or just should I name them?"

"There's no official list, we'll cover most that you forget though."

"Ok, well like I said before, my experience is rather limited, but not due to my willingness to try, but for my lack of opportunities, hence why I am here. I am eager for strap-on anal sex, I know you do some anal fisting. I have not been able to do it to myself, but a smaller person then myself, therefore a smaller fist with more commitment and expertise to doing it and a better angle I think I can take one." It was really embarrassing saying this to people, but I guess a little freeing as well. I'd never shared this before. It was my deep, dark private secret. It was funny that the first thing I talked about was anal sex and fisting. I just learned something about myself I guess.

"For bondage I like all kinds, even suspension, but not anything upside down, or even so my head is lower than my torso, I feel weird quickly whenever I'm like that, but yes, anything bondage, on any part of my body as long as it isn't ridiculously painful, that's great. Tied up helplessly and fucked in the ass hard, that's what I want summed up in a nutshell." I said that last line so meekly and with my eyes lowered. It really was so embarrassing.

"What's your pain tolerance like?" Nicole said gently, obviously sensing my hesitation and wanting to coax an answer out of me without making me feel threatened.

"I would say it's high, but I've seen guys and girls on your videos that definitely have higher ones than me, at least I think. I never have really pushed myself. I understand the point of pain and punishment in these things, but I don't like severe pain for pain's sake. I hope that's at least kind of clear."

"Its actually perfectly clear, you're a submissive who expects that as part of the experience, but you're not a pain slut. Ok, what about choking type stuff." Nicole asked.

"I don't really think I'd be into it, I've never tried it, but that's due to a lack of interest."

"OK, so if someone tried it on you, you wouldn't mind?"

"Nope, but I may not like it after the first time and not want it anymore. Is that ok?"

"Yes, of course." said Nicole kindly, "The amount of times people have thought they wouldn't like something and then loved it is staggering." Ben smiled and nodded in agreement.

"That doesn't surprise me at all. How can you know for sure until you've tried it? In the heat of the moment maybe I'll really get off on it."

"Ok, how about whipping, hitting anything like that?" Dan asked. "Any pain type things you prefer or avoid?"

"Well I love nipple clamps, well clamps of any kind, almost anywhere really. Weighted ones especially. As far as hitting and whipping, I've had limited experience with this too, but I definitely like it, anything, whips, paddles, hands, feet. But again, not excessive pain, I like it to be a part of something I guess, just me getting hit wouldn't be a turn on, but me getting fucked while slapped hard I would really be into. Also, I'm not really interested in getting hit in the balls or cock, lightly is fine, but nothing more than a soft slap, and even those hurt and make me jump away."

Then I continued "Just one more thing, I guess the hitting is more about being degraded/humiliated and owned. I really enjoy that aspect, I would love being forced to do things that degrade me, like lick a foot, forced to eat ass or anything at all like that. I'd love just being treated like an annoying piece of shit, like the girls can barely bother with me the whole time, they don't see me as having worth so they do what they want, insult, hit, taunt, etc. It's my acceptance/obedience and eagerness to satisfy them and their terrible behavior that gives me some small value in their eyes. And that fact that I tolerate and crave them at their worst behavior, which no one else would, makes them think even less of me, makes me ever lower in their eyes. So even though they find me pathetic, that willingness is worth something to them, just enough to some of their precious time on me, but its just barely worth it. And I know all this, I know that they could discard me without a thought, so since I want to serve them so badly, I submit to anything they want with a desperate grasp so they will keep me around. "

"Wow, quite the insight into your psyche. Alright, you're really submissive aren't ya?" said Nicole.

"Yeah, I guess," I said, feeling embarrassed. I've never said it before, all at once, I've only thought about different parts."

"That's awesome, sexy when a man likes to give up his power for a while." Nicole said, bringing an embarrassed smile to my face as I looked down.

"Electric stuff?" Dan asked.

"I've never tried, but it seems interesting, more than choking type stuff. I'd like to try it, but again, I don't know how much or what I'd like really, so it's hard to plan anything around that as well."

I'm usually not much of a talker, but despite my embarrassment I felt an eagerness to get this off my chest for the first time in my list, it was therapeutic in a way, like finally giving up on that big lie. So again I rambled on, embarrassed but continuing without censor. "Also, as far as degrading goes, I've always thought it would be degrading to eat my own cum, but I've never brought myself to do it, in fact after I orgasm I lose all interest in sex, so if you made me orgasm really early and eat the cum, I'd really hate it, but of course deep down I'd love it. Like after I cum I get turned off by all sex stuff, so I think that'd be a great way to do it. I'm really only good for one orgasm a night, I know some guys can almost bounce right back, I can't. I think that would go over well on film."

"I've also tasted piss before, and that turned me on as well, so I think anything at all related to piss play, drinking, poured on me, etc, I'm all for as well. And again post orgasm piss would gross the shit out of me."

"Hmm, ok, what about spit, sweat, pussy juices. All good too?"

"Yeah, bring it on, as long as all these body fluids come from girls. Spitting in my mouth and slapping my face sounds really awesome." Nicole smiled serenly at that, I think she was picturing it in her mind.

"Ok, what about sex machines, any problem with those at all?"

"Never tried em, but I'm sure they're fine too."

"Ok, anything else?"

"Yeah, actually, I was thinking I should trim my hair to hide my identity a bit more, but if you guys want to do it on camera, I think that'd be pretty cool, make me consent through whipping and let them do it, or just have me tied down and then do it. Either way."

"That'd be a first," said Dan, looking at Nicole, who also made an 'interesting' type face. "We'll definitely consider it."

"Anything else Nicole?"

"No, I think we got most of it."

"Ok Tom, now we're doing to need you to strip so we can look you over one more time, and since this is a male sub shoot, Nicole is going to stick two fingers in your ass to make sure your ass is stretched like you say it is. So if you could stand up and take your clothes off for us.."

"Sure." With no apprehension at all, I got up and stood away from the chair and unbuttoned my shirt a bit and then pulled it over my head before undoing my jeans and sliding them off with my underwear as I stood before them almost naked except for shoes and socks and pants at my ankles.

"Is this good?"

"No step out of the pants and socks off too, we like the whole thing." Nicole said gently, "I know its silly, but we need to be thorough.

Worried I wouldn't be allowed to sit bare assed in their chair, I crouched over and untied my shoes and then took them both off and then socks. I could feel their eyes watching my naked body as I did this.

Naked and standing upright again, they had me turn around and then Nicole approached me from behind, I felt a gloved, greased hand approach my asshole, she held my bare chest with her other hand as she quickly and easily slide two fingers into my ass, pushing them all the way in and then wiggling around in me. I could feel my dick start to move, but thankfully it was over fast and I wasn't left with an embarrassing erection.

"Yeah, he'll be fine, he's actually pretty loose," she said and then rubbed my chest as she pulled away.

"Ok Tom, go ahead and get dressed then meet us in the lounge area across the hall where you'll sign all your papers and we'll set a date for the shoot and the proposed scenes."

A few minutes later the two of them sat on a couch over a coffee table and I sat in a chair beside them. They passed me like 8 different sets of papers to sign, I glanced over them all but didn't read too close. Dan then showed me the mask I was going to wear and I tried it on at a mirror, it hid my face good enough, it was like a sleeping mask with eye holes. It was very tight to prohibit sliding. I suppose someone that knew me well and saw this would strongly suspect it's me, my body type and voice adding to evidence, but it couldn't be confirmed and that was unlikely anyways.

I took it off and sat back down.

"Ok, as I understand it, you want to shoot as soon as possible?" Dan asked.

"Yes, I'm actually leaving SanFran for a while as soon as this is done."

"Ok, so how about tomorrow? We don't have much shoots then and we have a lot of girls we can discuss that are available."

"That's perfect."

"Ok, start at noon, it can run anywhere from 4-7 hours for a shoot usually."

"That's fine. I want to go as long as possible."

"Say that now, we'll see a few hours in how you feel, being tied up takes it toll." Dan said "Now we are going to spend the money you so graciously waived on another girl to help dominate you like you requested. Did you have any girl preference? General type or actual girls that you see around on site?"

I did, and I told them "Lexi, the petite blonde I love, she's so cute and sweet looking, delicate, pale skin, but she gets nasty and tough when she needs to, its obvious she has a dirty mind. The other one I would really like is Amber, she's also small, I love those thin girls with perky tits, I especially love the thought of smaller, almost fragile looking girls dominating me. But Amber has that ferocious/ruthless vibe to her, I think she'd be great. They are both really good at being degrading and making the sub want to earn their approval."

"Ok, we'll see what we can do about that, now we have some shoot ideas of our own, let's see if we can fit together with whatever ideas you surely have."

"Sounds good." We then worked for like an hour, debating possible scenarios and throwing ideas at each other. Nicole, it turns out, hadn't been involved in many of these and this was her first male sub shoot that she was actually involved in, which was her favorite site. She was very helpful, almost too helpful, her ideas were the most extreme for sure, a lot I loved as they took what I had to another level, but they also scared me, and I wasn't one to back away from a challenge so most of her ideas were probably going to be in the shoot. Nicole herself was impressed at my eagerness to try her ideas and pleased with herself for being such an important factor in the setup. She was smiling at me warmly every time I was eager to try something she proposed.