- BDSM
- Cat and Mouse
- Page 2
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He plunged his cock into me, as I twisted against the wall. My legs pushed and entwined around his body, pulling him to me. My angst and hunger was being filled and I didn't want to let go. His hand moved up roughly past my breast and circled around my throat. My eyes widened at him, I began to shake uncontrollably as he pressed against me. The head of a nail was scraping against my back, mixing pain with pleasure, as he pounded me with his cock.
His grip around my neck tightened slightly, his eyes close to mine. "I told you I would have you." So much desire and emotion filled me as my body involuntarily shook and bucked against his thick hard cock. There was no mercy, as he brutally took my body as his, fucking me even harder as I screamed. He exploded, hot, filling my cunt with his cum, crushing me against the wall. His grip around my throat lessened, as his need was fulfilled. I moaned and my pussy twitched and bucked on his cock, never wanting it to stop.
He left me tied to the wall, his cum and mine, mixing to run down my legs. His eyes never left me as he began putting his clothes back on. He didn't say a word as he dressed, and I hung there twisting, aching for more. He walked up to me, sliding his fingers into my pussy and lifting his cum soaked fingers to my mouth. I stared at him as he slid them in and out between my lips.
"Tomorrow I will take your ass." He said roughly and smacked my bottom hard, as I gasped and begin to protest, his lips met mine again. His kiss bore down hard, silencing me into submission, as I lunged again towards him. His hand slipped the belt off of my wrists, and he pulled back. "I will call you in the morning."
He left me standing there, with my clothes in my hand, as he pulled out of my friend's driveway. Stunned and exhausted from the emotional and physical relief, I went home and quickly fell asleep. He was the last thought on my mind as I drifted off, my fingers buried between my legs, remembering the way he felt.
Morning came quickly as the phone woke me from my dreams.
"Hello?"
"What are you doing for lunch today?"
"Anything you wish."
- COMMENTS
Anonymousover 13 years agoWas Stupid, He Almost Raped Her Why The Fuck is She Acting Like Such a Needy Slut?!
needchocolatenowover 13 years agoIt's a good story but it wasn't told very well. Bad grammar is okay in dialogue, if that's how the character talks, but not in narrative. The central conflict is how the chase affects Lenore; angry/furious at Bill and at the same time unwillingly responding to him. That makes a good story conflict. But I wish you had played that up more. As a result the whole story fell flat and the ending seemed completely out of place in how rushed it was.
Instead of rushing through the time line and mentioning her inner conflict almost in passing, I wish you had linked-with more detail- each encounter and how it served to further confuse her as her feelings became deeper and less welcome. He's aggressive and he crosses the line. He's also in a cohabitation relationship thus making him emotionally unavailable in the long run. Readers could see and believe that her anger and desire to not be around him was real and believable.
But her growing responses to him needed more revelation. While, "cuming in my panties.." certainly reveals her growing response it's crudeness and lack of elaboration leaves the reader blank.
"... angry and embarrassed of my reaction to him, I went home." Here's where you could have begun her exploration into how shocked she had been to respond to him that way; her questions about why and how this could be?
By the end she's she's running into him most everywhere. But is she expecting to run into him, expecting to be approached by him, secretly looking forward to it? Again this could have had big impact had it been detailed more thoroughly. I wonder if she was ever fighting her disappointment when she went out but didn't see him? I wonder if she ever went somewhere, specifically because she might see him and secretly hoping he'd be there and had to hide her happiness when he was?
I'll reiterate; the story, the protagonist, antagonist and central conflict had huge potential. More time developing and editing would have made this story among the excellent.
