Charismatic Billy Belair

They were delighted to find the sun streaming in, although the saleswoman had said it did, but seeing is believing for two rather nervous buyers, both wondering if they had invested too fast and too much.

They had breakfast at a café a few yards down from the apartment block and they hurried off to work, walking.

"Oh god, I was going to suggest we have our first fuck in the apartment," complained Monique but was gently chided, "What, on bare floorboards – are you mad?"

It had been agreed at dinner the previous night that Monique would take Friday off and go shopping with her mother and Julia and buy furniture and furnishers with delivery on Saturday morning. The only items Billy wanted to choose were his office desk and chair, filing cabinets and the kitchen coffee machine. Monique promised to choose their bed very carefully and that the suite should not be ornate of overly girly. She guessed she knew what he meant but reasoned he would notice anything after a couple of days provided it didn't grate.

* * *

Billy peered through the gloom in Mr Gold's office to find him.

"You'll need a better office if I'm to represent you?"

"I'm still thinking about your proposal. Your fees schedule is too high."

"With our firm you pay for quality and get it. If you want a discount attorney go to a brothel and find one."

"You are very funny. I never thought of finding an attorney there."

"They are the bad guys who have prostituted their profession."

"If that's funny I had better laugh," said Mr Gold, emptying his coffee cup.

"So you think I deserve better offices?"

"Yes, but not too pretty otherwise people will think you have too much money and mug you or swindle you over deals, which amounts to the same thing."

"Every time I listen to you Billy you sound more and more like us."

"Oh no, no. I speak proper American."

"I mean you think more like us than any other attorneys do."

"Mr Gold, you are hallucinating through drinking too much coffee."

"I already have a new office. I move out of here tomorrow because redevelopment of this site starts Saturday." Come see my new office. The syndicate has purchased a building and given me a room. All I require is my one filing cabinet, a telephone and a coffer machine and a table and chairs for my pals to sit around and lie about deals they've done or are doing."

"Right I'll have a look at your new office because I need to know where to come when you appoint me as your sole attorney."

"Are you illegally soliciting for business?"

"No, definitely not. You said you were considering engaging me. I know you have already made that decision but you find it cool to play hard to get."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Well come down and meet the heads of the syndicate."

"That sounds ominously like the mob."

"The syndicate operates to make money legitimately, using inside information and artful negotiation techniques that the corporate guys they are pitted against don't really understand. They also know how to take a strategic stake in a future development by identifying the cornerstone property and buying the lease."

"Yeah, you taught me about that. Well this is why I'm here."

Billy told Mr Gold about the bar women's problem and how he wished to rack up the price.

"Okay, give me the details and I'll get someone to find out what the planned development is and was money will be allocated for the purchase of that lease If options have been taken on other properties it's only a matter of finding out what coverage of the ground area they compromise, what the agreed selling prices are and then finding what is the project budget for acquiring leases and then doing simple calculations."

"Okay, I can understand that. But how can you get your hands on such confidential information?"

"We rarely have to pay for it and that's why we operate the syndicate. There's usually someone who knows someone who is owed a favor."

"I see. That didn't teach us that at law and business schools."

"Well since you will be representing me as well as the syndicate you are going to learn many things that are not taught at business and law schools."

"So I am going to represent you?"

"It appears I have said that. I have arranged for all files to be delivered to you at your office. If the syndicate decides en bloc to have you represent them you will require a large office and support team."

"Why?"

"The syndicate currently has 302 members."

"Jesus – whoops, sorry for that slip. Jumping catfish."

"You are a polite boy Billy, thank you. I'll get this information for you. My fee will be $20,000."

"Jumping catfish!"

"It's not too bad. You'll rake in at least $100,000, perhaps closer to $300,000 if we get that crucial budget figure for lease acquisitions. You only pay the fee if I'm satisfied the information is genuine and you don't pay anything until you received your cut."

Billy turned wide-eyed. "Fair enough, but no one would pay enough to return me $300,000?"

"If they are corporate guys, as they well be, they will pay up to what their budget says or more if the need is great. They set their budgets to upper estimates. Everyone in the corporation wants to come in under budget, not over it."

"Mr Gold, you should be a professor at Harvard."

"Harvard what?"

"Oh nothing."

"Ah a joke that misfired. Rule one Billy, don't think you can win them all."

"Actually do you want to make the fee $30,000? My thinking is the bar lady should pay that as an expense in setting up the deal."

Mr Gold said, "Rule 2 Billy in setting fees or in doing a deal is to avoid being greedy. However I do believe the bar lady should share my fee with you."

Billy said, "Well in the first instance twenty thou will be fine. I want repeat business from you. May I ask this syndicate, how is it you appear to control it?"

"Oh it's a long tried and proven system Billy. They are all people who have borrowed money from me and will borrow again and I do the hard part of the thinking about deals they come up with and for which they pay me a fee. I'm not their chairman or president or anything like that. They just regard me as their business guru. In all probability you will be my successor. We need to ensure you are set up financially to be the guru.

Billy gaped.

"Close your mouth Billy. The flies in this depressed neighborhood are not savory or good for digestion. Heh-heh-heh."

* * *

The three partners looked at Billy in disbelief.

Ashleigh said, "You are telling us you are bringing into the firm 302 clients?"

"No, it's 303 clients including Mr Gold."

Lance said carefully, "Billy you haven't taken any substance that is causing you to hallucinate have you?"

"No, what is it with you guys? You look ready to burst out laughing."

Leon said, "Look at it our way Billy. The record for one person bringing in multiple clients in one day was three, set in 1923 I think it was, and equaled in the late 1940s as business confidence began to build after World War 2."

At that moment Faye, Ashleigh's PA came bursting in, looking really alarmed. "Mr Brown, we are in the cusp of disaster. Guys from three vans are bringing in files they say belong to new clients. Where do we store them? They say dispatch dockets show there are 17, 657 files belonging to three hundred and three clients."

Billy smiled at the horrified faces of the partners.

"Well guys, I did the groundwork attracting the clients without soliciting. You guys have the responsibility of running the office. My sole client out of these is Mr Gold but the syndicate wants me to keep an eye on all work done for them – for a fee of course."

"Syndicate?" Ashleigh said, turning white.

"Syndicate?" echoed Leon and Lance.

"They are legit," Billy grinned. "I could establish my own law firm and take all these clients but it's too much like hard work. I prefer leaving it to you to allow me to maintain my entrepreneurial flair."

"Well, I must be off. It's lunchtime. Come on guys, look pleased. I bet you are forever talking about the need to grow the business. Oh by the way, I was talking to a bar owner yesterday who has a legal problem she confided in me and has appointed me to rack up the price a developer will pay to obtain her lease on a cornerstone property in a hotel development. The syndicate is doing some groundwork for me that should only take a day or so and then I need a couple of hours to tie up the deal. I could be bringing in up to $300,000 as this firm's cut but that depends on how negotiations go."

Billy was almost out of the door when he turned and said, "I happened to find out Mr Gold's younger brother owns the Dwight building beside us. I told him our firm was looking to expand the business. Mr Gold will probably convince his brother for to relocate his tenants elsewhere for the chance to rack up space he leases to you guys. Mr Gold says he won't charge a fee on this occasion to establish goodwill with your guys.

Ashleigh chocked, "Mr Gold expects to become involved in fee-charging situations with us?"

"Yes but we regard it as a service fee, not a professional fee. When your investigators fail to turn up with information you want Mr Gold will put the syndicate to work on it. Not the whole syndicate of course, just the best people for the job."

The senior partners looked at one another and sighed.

"Oh fuck, do you guys know the floor loading limit on my floor. That many files suggests tons of extra weight."

Billy left the partners in deep panic.

THE END