Christian College Sex Comedy Ch. 06

"What are they doing?" whispered Leigh once she'd pulled the shirt from her mouth.

"He's making love to my ass," Barbie Lynn sighed joyfully.

"Barbie Lynn is a virgin so her vagina is a no-go," Rio teased.

"Doesn't it hurt?" Leigh questioned. Barbie Lynn shook her head in the negative.

"Oh, don't let her lie to you," Rio began, "It hurts like a son-of-a-bitch the first time you do it, but Zane's got Barbie here loving it. It has made her one obedient little bitch."

"Rio," I cautioned, "that's not so. Barbie Lynn and I have found something we like, we are good at, and we do it. It's not for everyone."

"So you two have never...Mmmphf," Leigh mumbled as Rio shoved the shirt back in her mouth.

"I'm about to twist her nipples off," Rio explained to the rest of us, "So I had better get her ready."

I found myself torn by the sensation of Barbie's warm, tight rectum and Iona staring down at me with a far-off expression.

"Yes, Iona?" I gasped to her.

"I never ever thought anything like this would happen to me; meeting girls like Rio, Barbie Lynn, and Leigh; meeting a boy like you...both naked with me sitting on your chest...getting so wet and feeling so wonderful," she confessed.

"I thought the first naked man I saw would be on my wedding night, if I ever got married at all," Iona added.

"Fine," I thought out loud, "if we both graduate, we agree to go to the same post-graduate school. I'm pre-med and you are...pre-Law, right?" Iona nodded. "We'll be roommates and I'll vet your boyfriends.

"I'd like that," she smiled at me.

Barbie Lynn leaned forward and started kissing Iona on the neck where it meets the shoulder. Iona murmured and slowly fell forward with Barbie right on top of her. I began thrusting up into Barbie's rump as she moved forward, bringing Iona's subtle breasts within reach of my mouth.

Beneath the two girls I felt Barbie's hand snake out and begin frigging Iona's slit and clit. We were rocking and sucking together for an uncertain amount of time before a sharp smack against Barbie Lynn's ass brought me back to my senses. Several sharp slaps by Rio followed before Barbie Lynn yelled passionately.

"Jesus Loves Me!" Barbie Lynn screamed before anyone could stop her. How I was going to explain this to Aunt Jill was beyond me. All I did know was that suddenly everyone was as quiet as they could be, considering the panting that was going on.

"Wow," Leigh whispered, "this was fun. We have to do it again."

"Amen to that," Barbie Lynn gasped.

"Amen," Rio and Iona followed suit.

"Sure," I added, "but not tonight -- I'm beat."

"Oh, come on," purred Leigh, "one more time...for each of us." I tried to cover my eyes with my arm but Iona was still in the way so I settled for nestling into her bosom instead.

Iona moaned softly while running her hand through my hair and pressing me tightly to her. We remained close for over a minute before Rio intervened.

"Iona, let him up," Rio joked. "He's right for once, damn him. We need to get some sleep. If I miss church my parents will skin me alive."

The girls slipped back into their clothes, kissed me with varying, searing degrees of heat, and headed back upstairs.

"When are you coming back home?" Leigh requested as she knelt by the sofa.

"Friday night," I responded.

"That's no good," she pouted. "How about Wednesday night?"

"I have a curfew," I explained.

"What time is it?" she persisted.

"Ten o'clock," I answered.

"I can make that work," Leigh assured me with a lascivious grin. "Show up at eight." At this time, protesting the situation didn't seem all that wise.

Raining On My Parade

Sunday morning around the breakfast table was rather awkward. It took one look from Jill to me and the others to know that she knew what had happened during the night; it was the eight hundred pound gorilla in the room that no one wanted to acknowledge. I would have preferred that Jill was angry with me because the hurt look she shot my way made me feel like a low-down dirty dog.

"Jill," I promised, "I'm going to take the ladies back to campus so that they can get dressed and we'll meet you at church."

"I...okay," Jill said dully. I race upstairs and dressed before coming back down to collect everyone for the ride to school.

"Well, that was memorable," Rio quipped as I pulled out of the driveway.

"Do you think she suspects something happened last night?" Iona asked timidly.

"With the screaming some of you bitches did, I think the whole sorority heard us," Rio mocked. I saw Iona blush in the rearview mirror and Barbie Lynn shot me an apologetic look.

"I'd rather have to deal with your enthusiasm, Barbie Lynn, than not be with you," I assured the blonde with a squeeze to her knee. Her responding grin was hungry with lust -- damn it.

"What about the rest of us?" Rio questioned playfully.

"I'd really miss Iona," I answered snidely, "but you, not so much, Rio."

"Oh, you are just pissed," Rio laughed, "that I put some batteries up your butt and looked for the vibrate switch."

"Why do you have to be so mean, Rio?" Iona asked.

"She's not being mean," I preempted Rio. "She likes us and she'd do anything for us, though she'd never admit it."

"That's not true," protested Rio. "I like Iona but that's only because she's so small I could fit her into my carry-on luggage and use her as my personal sex toy."

"What about Barbie Lynn?" Iona inquired.

"I'd like to spend a few days in an isolated cabin teaching ol' Barbie the joys of Sapphic Love, but in the end I'd be too jealous of her ginormous boobies to keep her around," Rio explained as she reached over from the back seat and grabbed both of Barbie Lynn's breasts and gave them a big squeeze.

"Hey!" yelped Barbie Lynn, more surprised than outraged as she slapped Rio's hands away. We coasted up to the security gate to the campus parking lot so we had to calm down.

Getting the ladies dressed and back to the car in time was comparatively easy after that. What to do once we got to church was another matter.

I had never been to this Sunday school and Barbie Lynn was of no help because she taught school to the nine-years-old and under crowd. Rio and Iona had previous experience at other churches but if it hadn't been for Christina and company, I'd have been at a total loss. They went to the women's class while I went to the men's (18-25) class, but they gave me some names to go by, including Mr. Coleman, my teacher.

Barbie Lynn had found out which book of the Bible we'd be studying but I'd failed to get to it so I was somewhat at a loss. Mr. Coleman was kind enough to stop calling on me after thirty minutes of humiliation but I served as the butt of amusement for my male colleagues for the entire time. I silently resolved to sleep with all their girlfriends if at all possible, but that was the angry, sleepy me talking.

My revenge turned out to be swift in coming. When we departed class and made the slow migration toward the Church proper, I was immediately inundated with FFU girls, all two hundred of us. The majority of the girls sat in one section of the church and convincing Aunt Jill to join our little group of Barbie Lynn, Rio, and me allowed us to stay together.

In short order I was the center of bevies of young ladies from the college as we took over a section of the Tabernacle in the back of the church until they were ready to begin. We sang, had a reading selected from the Old Testament, another song, a shorter reading from the New Testament, and then a long sermon about the wickedness of the material world.

Sitting in this massive house of God, plush cushion under my tush, hair touched by state-of-the-art climate control, with marble and teak floors/walls/ceilings and huge stained glass windows, I could sympathize with the whole 'Material World being evil' vibe. Pastor William corrected me by explaining the blessings God places upon his 'Anointed Ones', people chosen by God for success. I wasn't sure which book of the Bible that was discussed in.

We finished up with the collection and another song before the service concluded and we were allowed to disperse. Rio grabbed my bicep so hard that her fingernails bit through my jacket and shirt.

"For the love of God, Zane," Rio hissed, "get me out of here. I swear I'll give you my virginity ... again if you just get me out of this cesspit."

"It isn't so bad," Iona commented, "but it is awful big." Apparently missing the exchange, Aunt Jill dragged me toward the front of the church, not toward the rear exit like I wanted. Several men had gathered around Pastor William, mostly elderly looking but two or three younger ones as well.

"Ah, Glenn Braxton," Pastor Bill greeted me with that creepy smile, "your aunt tells me you want to become more active in the church."

That was the first I'd heard about that, or even thought it, but I elected not to embarrass Jill.

"I guess that's a possibility," I allowed. "What do you have in mind?"

"I think we could have a spot for an assistant with the Festivities Committee," Bill graciously presented to me. "They meet every Wednesday night at six."

"That would be fantastic," I lied. I would have worried more about lying in a House of God had Pastor Bill not been wearing enough cloth of gold to feed the town's homeless for a month.

"Fine," Bill grinned. "Lance, why don't you show young Glenn where he needs to show up?"

One, no one has called me 'young Glenn' since I was eight; Two, Lance was Lance Wellington, Mayor's son, just started George Mason Law School, handsome and vain, and yes, he mocked me in Bible class too.

Lance separated from the crowd around good ol' Bill with a smile that was as false as it was cultured. I shook the limp hand he offered but my return smile had nothing to do with Lance. A gorgeous young woman with long hair so pale blonde that it looked white in the filtered sunlight walked up and stood dutifully beside Lance.

"My fiancé," Lance gloated, as he possessively wrapped an arm around her waist, "Felicity Tolliver."

"Nice to meet you," I greeted Felicity. She hesitated a moment before shaking my hand while Lance looked on as if he was waving a nice, new toy in front of my face.

"You are an FFU alum," Rio interjected herself into the conversation.

"Rio Talon," I introduced her to the couple, "and Iona Becket." Barbie Lynn hadn't joined us yet.

"Felicity, what do you do now?" Rio beamed a deceptively friendly look. "Have you ever thought about helping out at the University? I bet you'd be great at it. I've only just met you but I feel inspired by your accomplishments."

What the fuck was all that about?

"Oh, thank you," Felicity responded. "I spend all my time getting our home ready for Lance so when we get married in the spring, everything will be ready."

I repeat myself, what the fuck was that all about? The woman had a college degree and she was reduced to being a one-shot interior designer?

"Maybe you could recruit some of us girls to help you at your house and in turn, you could give us pointers on what we can expect from life after we graduate," Rio kept going. Felicity clearly warmed up to the idea but waited on Lance to make his opinion known.

"Enjoy yourself, Felicity, with your little schoolmates," he told her in a condescending tone and added to the insult by actually patting her on the head.

"I'd be happy to come by the school, then," Felicity grinned like a loyal little puppy.

"That's great," Rio all but bounced up and down with enthusiasm. "I can't wait to see so much more of you and get to know all about you."

"That's enough of your little friends, Glenn," Lance stated. "Let me show you where you need to report to on Wednesday."

Right then Barbie Lynn showed up so I fished out my keys and threw them to her.

"Barbie Lynn," Felicity exclaimed before they hugged one another. I wanted to stay and ask some questions but Lance strutted away and I had the feeling I was supposed to follow him around like a well-trained dog.

I was regaled with the plentiful data that Lance knew about the church and who was who in it; my input was never required or even wanted. Only when I got to the actual conference room did I get any pertinent information; namely, that the Festival Committee was made up of the housewives of various bigwigs in the church hierarchy.

Apparently he found that I was on a 'women's committee' to be mirthful because there was some inherent inferiority in doing women's work. I decided to not throw a piddling little thing like childbirth in his face but then I began to have doubts that Lance ever had a mother.

"The committee is chaired by my Mother," Lance said dismissively. Well, damn, he did have one.

"Is she good looking?" I asked innocently. Lance looked at me with confusion, as if how a woman looked could ever matter, so I clarified. "Can I see what she looks like so I will know her when I see her?" Lance grunted non-committedly and showed me a picture of a woman on his phone. Holy Crap! She was Felicity but twenty-five years older, richer, and more mature in features.

"Have you ever thought you might have an Oedipus complex?" I had to ask. His mother and fiancé looked so much alike.

"What?" Lance said, rather confused.

"Oh, nothing," I evaded. "I need to get back to school." Lance clearly dismissed my earlier question as irrelevant and moved on with his life, which fortunately led me back to the parking lot and my girls.

I dropped the girls off at campus, pleaded with Barbie Lynn to meet me after curfew (she liked it when I begged), and raced back to Aunt Jill's for our midday meal.

After a few bites,"Zane, I saw what happened last night and I was shocked," Jill proclaimed.

"How much did you see?" I questioned.

"Enough," she snapped. "Zane, why do you let those women abuse you like that? What are they threatening you with?" she pleaded with me to tell her. I was speechless. How did she reach that conclusion to last night's events?

"Aunt Jill, this is part of my Christian duty, to learn humility from my classmates. And trust me, I was humbled last night...repeatedly."

"I didn't know about this," Jill wondered.

"It teaches me to obey those in authority, Jill. Maybe we could try it out here. They call it the Handmaiden's Duties. You can demand of me any task that does not cause permanent physical harm, Jill, absolutely anything you can come up with."

"I've sung songs, carried book bags, given massages, cleaned rooms, and changed light bulbs. There is nothing overly sexual about it, but nor is it forbidden. I do a lot of kissing as well, but it is all in good fun. Aunt Jill, take some time and think of something around the house you can command me to do, all for the sake of teaching me humility."

"Zane, did you like what they did to you?" she finally asked.

"Most of it was fun but there was a time when they had me crawl everywhere on my knees, which led to those bandages you saw earlier," I responded, totally avoiding what she really wanted to know -- namely about the sex.

"I thought they couldn't hurt you," she questioned.

"Special case; the Chancellor wants me gone so the normal rules don't apply," I informed Jill.

"That's not...is there anything I can do?" she responded.

"I'm good. She learned that I was more than willing for them to put me in the hospital and sue their asses off. Of course, that was this week. Next week it will be something new," I grinned.

"Zane, have you prayed on the matter?" Jill asked sincerely.

"Aunt, I worship every night," I replied; technically true as I was worshiping the female form every chance I got.

"I am sure that God will provide you with a solution," Jill promised me. I almost hoped she was right.

I Fought the Law

After returning to school, changing clothes, and doing some homework, I returned to the parking lot right before five, still chuckling over Rio's amorous plans for Felicity...or more like darkly sensual plans for her. Iona and I made more constructive plans for a Tuesday evening get-together of the freshman class up in the Solarium. A great cleanup would hopefully ensue.

Christina stood by the car while Heaven leaned against it. I admit that I resented her being there but Christina had this thing about protecting her best friend. As I approached, Heaven got up and walked around to the passenger side of the car.

"Whoa, where are you going?" I inquired. Heaven and Christina looked confused, then Heaven looked a little pissed.

"I need a kiss," I explained to Heaven.

"Zane, don't be an ass," Heaven growled but all I did was tap my lips with a finger. Christina had the good sense to stay out of this. "Grrr..." Heaven snarled as she stomped around the car to me. She leaned up and gave me a brief kiss, then backed away.

"You can do better than that," I whispered to her seductively. "Kiss me as hard as you want me to hammer you tonight." That got her all screwed up inside and I could see it, but in the end lust won out over bad dreams and Heaven sensually stepped into me, pulled my face to her by the back of my head and kissed and kissed and kissed, our tongues warring for some time.

"I don't know if I can live up to that," I panted down at her.

"You had better," she taunted me as she patted my face then walked away.

"When should I expect you back?" Christina spoke up.

"I'll have her back by curfew," I assured her. Heaven snorted.

"I'll bring him back when I'm done with him," Heaven chortled; she was really enjoying this now. We remained remarkably silent for the first few miles until we pulled into the restaurant. "What are you doing?" Heaven questioned with unusual timidity.

"We are getting something to eat," I answered matter of factly.

"For real?" she wondered.

"Sure. I asked you out on a date. What were you expecting?" I questioned.

"Honestly, I expected you to drive me down some dirt road and screw my brains out," she admitted, emotionally conflicted.

"I haven't been on a real Western date since I was fifteen but I think I have the formula right: food -- movie -- sex," I joked. The look she gave me demanded that I clarify things. "This isn't a joke to me, Heaven. I wanted to go out with you and I hope we have a good time tonight; it is not my object to simply bang you and go home."

"But why me? I know I asked you to spend time with me, but why this?" Heaven continued.

"Heaven, I find you hot, sexy, and you wanted to spend time with me," I responded. "Did I make a mistake?" Heaven thought that over for a few moments then a smile blossomed onto her face.

"No, you didn't make a mistake," Heaven grinned slyly, "but even though this is my first time out with a guy, don't think you can get away with anything."

"What, no blow job?" I teased her, which earned me a glare. "I take it a titty-fuck is out of the question," and she hit me hard but then she snickered.

"Behave!" she commanded while shaking a finger at me and grinning. "Now come around and open my door. That is what gentlemen do." I wasn't sure about being a gentleman but hey, I got out and opened Heaven's door for her. When she got out, I shut the door, wrapped an arm around her, and took her inside.

As we sat down to eat a few subjects invariably caused problems; mainly, Heaven's family. She was fine telling me about Christina and their days in private academy together. The two had been inseparable since first grade and spent all their holidays together. Only when I talked about their future did Heaven grow silent.

"I'd like it if you stuck around once Christina and I are married," I stated. "Our kids would need an aunt that we could trust to look out for them no matter what."

"That's not funny, Zane," Heaven responded venomously.

"I'm serious; Christina trusts you with her life and that's enough of an endorsement for me; plus, I honestly like you, Heaven," I explained.