Cleanliness Is Next to Sexiness

Dedicated to Michelle's cousin. Thanks for the title!

"I always knew that men were slobs, but you get the blue ribbon, Mike."

I looked over at my Aunt Diane as she surveyed my living room Beside her, my Uncle Frank was quietly laughing. He rolled his eyes and turned away from his wife as she lectured me.

"I'm not a slob. My place just has that lived-in look," I countered.

"Yeah -- lived-in by a pig," she retorted.

I laughed. I also begrudgingly admitted to myself that my aunt was right, but I did not care. I lived alone, like I had done since graduating from university, and saw no reason to change in order to meet someone else's standards. Besides, the adage about not being able to teach an old dog new tricks applied to me. At thirty-seven I was not going to change, nor did I want to.

My aunt walked the perimeter of the room, like a drill sergeant inspecting a soldiers' barracks. Her mouth was twisted in a distasteful sneer as she looked at an empty pizza box on the coffee table and several empty beer cans beside it.

"Don't even get me started on your bathroom, Mike. When I went up to use it earlier I had to hover over the seat. And don't you ever scrub your tub?"

My uncle had folded his arms and stepped back from his wife, obviously not wanting to get involved with her critique of my house. But there was still a smirk on his face.

Uncle Frank was my dad's younger brother. He and my aunt had been married going on twenty-five years. They had two daughters: Jennifer, who was just past twenty-two, and Michelle, who would be turning nineteen in three months. Both daughters still lived at home with their parents. Michelle had just completed her first year of college and had returned home just a couple of weeks previously.

"You need a maid, Mike," my aunt suggested.

"I'm doing just fine without one," I told her.

My aunt let out a frustrated sigh. She seemed almost angry at me for not being a good housekeeper. After several seconds of silence, while I waited for her to begin her criticism again, her green eyes widened and she smiled.

"I have an idea," she said. "How about you get Michelle to come in once a week to clean and --"

"No, I don't need that, Aunt Diane," I interrupted.

"Hear me out," she snapped, holding up a hand "You can get Michelle to come in once a week to clean and tidy the place up for you. It will benefit both of you because she hasn't found a summer job yet and could use some spending money. She won't want much for cleaning up and you won't have to lift a finger -- not that you do anyway, but at least your house will be clean. If you ever brought a women back here, she'd turn and run as soon as she got as far as the kitchen."

I sighed, knowing my aunt was right. It had been a while since I had dated, but I was well aware of women's standards for cleanliness. Having a clean house to bring someone back to would be good. Plus having someone else do the cleaning would be an added bonus.

"Okay. Tell her the job is her's if she's interested, but don't force her into it, okay?"

"I won't have to," my aunt assured me. "She'll be glad for the work."

My aunt disappeared into my kitchen. I heard her opening and closing cupboards. A few minutes later she returned and handed me a slip of paper.

"Here's a list of cleaning supplies you'll need. You can find them at the grocery store."

"I know where to find them," I said, sounding indignant.

"You'd never know it by the looks of this place," she retorted.

My uncle's laughed, then tightened his jaw.

"When do you want me to tell Michelle to come over?" she asked.

I thought for a moment. "Saturday would be great, if she's not busy. I'll be at work the rest of the week."

"Fine. I'll tell her."

###

That Friday evening after I ate I went to the grocery store, my aunt's shopping list in hand. I had not realized that my supply of cleaning products was so low, but judging from the list I needed everything from a new mop to disposable towels for wiping counters. One by one I tossed the items in my shopping cart, then added a six-pack of beer for myself.

Once I had accepted it, the thought of my cousin coming over to clean my house seemed like a good idea. Michelle and I were not especially close due to our age differences -- we only saw one another at weddings and the occasional family barbeque during the summer -- but I liked her and we always got along well. The arrangement seemed mutually beneficial and I was glad that I had taken my aunt up on her offer.

That Saturday I slept late, like I did every weekend. I was just finishing my breakfast when I heard a knock at the door. It was not quite ten-thirty. I looked up and saw Michelle peering through the window of the door. I jumped up to let her in.

"Hi, I hope I'm not too early," Michelle said. "Mom told me you'd probably be sleeping-in since it's the weekend."

I nodded, giving my cousin a grin. "Yeah, I only got up less than an hour ago," I said.

"Well, I won't get in your way. Just show me where the cleaning stuff is. Mom said she gave you a list." She laughed, as though she understood how thorough her mother could be.

"It's over here. I hope I got everything." I gestured towards the counter where I had placed the things I had purchased. In a corner was a brand new mop and pail.

"Geez, did she make you get enough stuff, or what?" My cousin shook her head and laughed.

Michelle was wearing a grey hooded sweatshirt with a zipper running down the middle. It was zipped half-way up. Her honey-blond hair hung down over her shoulder blades and chest. It looked shiny, as though she had just washed it. I was sure I could even detect the faint scent of hair conditioner. In the deep V of her open sweatshirt I noticed a bright blue t-shirt. It matched her piercing sapphire eyes. It had a scoop neck, leaving the edges of her collar bones and upper chest bare. I followed her golden tresses down from her shoulders to the hint of cleavage showing just above the neckline of her t-shirt. Beneath that, her conical breasts pushed out at the fabric. They were pert, maybe slightly more than good handfuls, and looked firm enough to crack an egg on. She looked so pretty even how she carried her five-foot seven body was graceful and seductive.

My cock began to stiffen, so I turned away from my cousin and sat back down. It had been the better part of a year since I had been around Michelle and did not recall her looking so pretty, or having such a nice body the last time I saw her when her parents hosted a barbeque. Perhaps she had filled-out while at college, or maybe I had just not taken notice of how sexy she was until that morning. Whatever the reason, I certainly found myself attracted to her then.

"So, where do you want me to start?" Her azure eyes sparkled as they met mine.

"Uh... it doesn't matter. Wherever you want to," I said.

"Okay. I'll start upstairs and work my way down."

Michelle unzipped her sweatshirt the rest of the way and shrugged it off. Her breasts strained her thin t-shirt as she pulled her arms from the sleeves of the sweatshirt, making them seem slightly larger than I had surmised earlier. I watched her from the corner of my eye. When she turned to hang her sweatshirt up on a coat tree by the door my eyes moved over her firm ass and slender hips. The blue denim of her jeans hugged the subtle curves of her firm body. I felt lecherous as I leered at my cousin, but she was the most lovely young woman I had seen in many months. Despite not dating, I certainly observed women, but had seen few who were as stunning as Michelle.

My cousin disappeared upstairs and I finished my breakfast, mentally scolding myself for lusting for someone who was not only half my age, but a family member. I opened the morning paper and began reading it, trying to push lewd thoughts about Michelle from my mind. Upstairs, I could hear water running and the sounds of my cousin cleaning. I made coffee and stood by the back door, looking out at the yard. A breeze was blowing and it was already hot. It was going to be a beautiful day.

I was drinking my second mug of coffee and reading the sports page of the paper when Michelle returned. I never heard her when she entered the kitchen and jumped when I heard her drop the pail on the floor. I turned around in my chair towards her. She was laughing.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," she said, still smiling.

"It's okay. I guess my hearing is going," I said. "Wait till you get to be my age -- you'll see."

"How old are you, Mike?" she asked, knitting her brow, as if she was trying to remember.

"Thirty-seven," I told her.

"That's not old... geez. Old is when you get to be my grandparents' age."

My cousin's remark surprised me somewhat because when I was a teenager anyone who was over thirty was considered old and not to be trusted -- or so said Jerry Rubin. I smiled at her, forcing myself to hold my gaze on her shimmering eyes and pouty lips, rather than the firm mounds filling out her t-shirt.

"I'm going to start in on the living room next. Oh -- I tidied-up your room some. I wasn't sure if that was okay or not. I hope you don't mind."

I winced a bit at the thought of my cousin seeing the state of my bedroom. Generally the house was messy enough, but my bedroom floor was littered with clothes I was planning to wash that afternoon, including my underwear. My computer was also in there, but it was turned off and I trusted her to respect my privacy and not turn it on and stumble upon my cache of porn and private Bookmarks on my browser.

"Ah... you can skip the bedroom, Michelle. That's okay. Thanks anyway," I said, trying not to sound ungrateful or displeased.

Michelle gave me a shrewd look, then smirked. "Why -- because you left your underwear on the floor? Don't be embarrassed, Mike. You should see my room; it's a mess too. I leave my bras and panties on the floor, so don't feel bad. I'm a slob too; it must run in the family. I put the clothes that were on the floor in the hamper in the bathroom -- that's all. But if you don't want me in there, I won't go in from now on."

A mixture of emotions flooded through me. I was definitely uncomfortable about my cousin finding my underwear on the floor and made a mental note to remember to pick them up before she came over next time. But what was like a bolt of electricity that went straight to my cock was her unreserved mention of her bras and panties.

"No... it's okay. I'll just pick up a few clothes next Friday night," I told her.

Michelle giggled. "Okay, I'm going to go tackle the living room next."

I watched, captivated by the movements of her hips and firm, round ass as my cousin walked away. My cock swelled and hardened once more as as I imagined giving her backside a squeeze and a quick smack. I sighed as I folded the newspaper and placed it on the counter. I poured myself another mug of coffee and looked out at the yard again, lost in thought. I wanted to go in to the living room to talk to Michelle and spend some time with her, but I did not want to bother her while she was working. Also, I did not trust myself not to leer, and I especially did not want her to even suspect that I was harbouring indecent thoughts about her.

I soon realized that having Michelle around on a weekly basis was going to be a mixed blessing. I would have a clean and tidy house, but her presence was going to be a source of constant torment. I would have to do my utmost to not allow myself to let my eyes wander over her. Let alone do or say anything inappropriate. I genuinely liked Michelle, in addition to my new-found lust for her, and did not want us to become estranged due to my goatish behaviour. What's more, my Uncle Frank would beat me within an inch of my life if he ever found out that I harboured incestuous thoughts for his daughter. There was too much at stake here for me to not restrain my libido.

About fifteen minutes later Michelle returned to the kitchen with a partially full garbage bag and placed it on the porch. She filled the pail with hot water and poured some cleanser in it then began mopping the floor.

"I'll get out of your way," I said, although I was quite happy where I was.

"No, you don't have to go. You're not in my way." My cousin looked up at me and smiled.

I stood in a corner of the kitchen, watching Michelle. Her silky, golden hair dangled and swayed as she worked the mop over the floor. As I was noticing how her hair shimmered as the sunlight streaming through the window hit it I discovered that I could see down her t-shirt as she leaned over. Her firm breasts shook noticeably within the pale blue bra she wore. They were firm and separated by deep cleavage, emphasized by her snug bra. I tore my eyes away, fearing she might look up at any moment.

"Thanks for giving me some work, Mike. I haven't been able to find a job yet since I got home." Michelle leaned on the mop and smiled at me. Her nipples had stiffened, probably from rubbing against her bra as she mopped.

"No problem. You're welcome," I said. "I really needed some help keeping this place clean, so it works out well for both of us."

"Yeah... just make sure you keep messing it up so I have a job," she joked.

"Well, I'm good at that."

By the time Michelle finished cleaning she looked tired. Her face was flushed and I noticed a faint sheen of sweat on her forehead. She sat down at the kitchen table, leaning back in a chair.

"Would you like something to drink? I've got juice and pop in the fridge," I told her.

"Water is fine," she said.

Michelle got up and poured herself a glass of water, then went to the fridge to get some ice cubes. She stood beside the sink, gulping it down.

"That was good," she gasped after she emptied the glass.

I took my wallet out and paid Michelle. She stared at the money, almost in disbelief.

"No... Mike, this is too much," she said, her wide, blue eyes meeting mine.

"No, it's not. The place was filthy and you worked your butt off. Next time take your time; you don't have to work so fast," I told her.

"I don't mind working my butt off. I could stand to lose some of it." She turned and thrust her rear-end towards me, emphasizing her point, then giggled.

I stared at my cousin's round ass, running my eyes over it's curves, thinking it looked perfect just as it was. Seconds later, when she turned around, I was still looking down with a slack-jaw. Michelle was watching me. I felt my cheeks flush and she laughed, seeming amused by the stupefied look on my face.

"Is there anything else you want done before I go?" she asked.

A dozen lewd answers crossed my mind but I shook my head. "No, thanks. What you've done was perfect. Next time won't be so bad since you've caught upon the mess. This was the hardest it will be." I assured her.

Michelle was zipping up her sweatshirt. She turned towards me and smiled. "Yeah... the first time is always the hardest, isn't it?"

Before I could restrain myself I let out a faint laugh at her double entendre. I nodded. "Do you need a ride somewhere?" I asked.

"No, thanks," she said with a shake of her head. "A friend of mine lives a couple of blocks away, so I'm going to her place. I haven't seen her since I got back from school."

Michelle took her cell phone from the pocket of her sweatshirt and called her friend. I tried to pretend I wasn't listening to the conversation.

"Traci is home, so I'm going over there. Bye for now, Mike," she said.

"Okay. Well, thanks again, Michelle."

"Thank-you. I'll see you next Saturday."

After Michelle left I wandered through the house. Not to inspect her work, but to marvel at how clean it was. It had not looked like that since the week I moved in. I ended up in my bedroom, still very horny. I slid my jeans and underwear down and laid on my bed. My cock rose towards the ceiling and I began to stroke it, thinking about my beautiful cousin.

###

Throughout the next week my thoughts were often preoccupied by Michelle. I could not get her out of my head. It seemed as though my yearning for her grew, if that was possible. Fantasies of her filled my mind nightly as I lay in bed masturbating. I could not wait for Saturday to arrive.

That Saturday morning I woke earlier than usual for a weekend morning. I was on the same schedule as I was during the week when I had to get up for work at the computer store. It was not as though I had to force myself to get up either. Anticipation of Michelle coming over would not let me sleep. I was like a kid on Christmas morning. After having a quick shower I made breakfast.

I was still reading the morning paper when I heard a rapping at the door. I looked up and saw Michelle's smiling face. The door was unlocked so she let herself in.

"Hi, Mike. How was your week?" she asked in a cheery voice.

"Okay, same 'ol same 'ol," I said.

"I've got good news: I found a job!" she said in an excited voice.

My cousin's news filled me with mixed emotions. I was happy for her, but feared that it meant that she could no longer clean my house. I smiled, trying to appear happier than I was. "That's great. Congratulations! So I guess I'll have to start looking for someone else to clean for me."

"Oh, no," she said with a shake of her head. "It's only a part-time job -- just twenty hours a week. Remember me mentioning my friend who lives around here? Well, her mom owns a flower shop and she needs someone to come in on mornings, so they hired me. But I'll still be coming over here on Saturdays. I'm not going to miss out on spending time with my favourite cousin."

I was relieved by her news and very pleased by her remark about me. "Well, I'm glad to hear that. This place would look like a sty again in no time if it weren't for you."

Michelle laughed as she unzipped her sweatshirt. From the corner of my eye I watched as she pulled it from her slender frame. Her hair was in a ponytail, which emphasized her pretty face. I noticed that she was wearing a hint of black eye liner and what seemed to be lip gloss. She had not worn any makeup the previous week; I would have surely noticed. She looked even prettier than the last time I saw her.

"So, do you want me to do basically the same as I did last week?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yes, please. But it's not as messy this time."

Michelle laughed. She was wearing a red tank top and denim shorts. Her top was much looser than the t-shirt she had on the week before, but it still did not completely conceal the outline of her breasts. I gave them a quick glance as she hung up her sweatshirt

"Okay, I'm going to start upstairs like I did last time. Do you want me to skip your room?"

I gave my cousin a nervous glance. "I think you can. I already picked up a few things in there this morning," I said.

"Like your underwear on the floor?" She gave me a sly grin.

I nodded and smirked, running my eyes over her bare legs.

"Well, I'll still sweep the floor, if that's okay with you."

"That would be great. Thanks."

As my cousin turned and walked away I followed her with my eyes. The denim of her shorts hugged her firm ass, accentuating it's curves. Her lean legs were well-toned and smooth as glass. Already I was fighting-off an erection.

It took Michelle less time to clean the upstairs than it had the week before. When she returned to the kitchen I was on my second mug of coffee and half-way through reading the paper. This time I heard her descending the stairs and was not startled when she joined me in the kitchen.

"I've finished upstairs. It hardly took any time. Did you clean the bathroom before I came?"

"No," I spat out. "I don't know how to clean -- but you already know that."

Michelle laughed. "Okay, I'll vacuum the hall and the living room next," she said.

"There's no rush, unless there's some place you have to be," I told her.