Cock Play

A bunch of girls and guys turned legal this year. Some of them can tell older people a thing or two about sex, some of them think they can tell older people a thing or two about sex and some of them are bungling ahead in the sexual jungle doing what they know and shying away from what they don't.

More's the pity.

This guide is intended for the novice (not virginal - although it wouldn't hurt the virgin's accumulation of knowledge and might make them better lovers when they do take the plunge) and for the late bloomers.

Ladies, it is a sad fact that if you don't teach your lover what foreplay is, he's just going to go for your pussy (or your ass) each time you let him. And this is supposed to be fun, sex is supposed to be fun, intimate, arousing, pleasurable and many other things. We don't just have sex to procreate, we are all born with a libido, male and female, we all need to satisfy our sexual needs.

So let's slow him down a little by learning what stimulates his cock most (except having it vacuum sealed in a hole) and the rule for great sex when you're between the ages of 18 and whenever your libido calms down a little is to let him climax the first time by means other than penetration, because honey, if you let him in the first time, you're barely going to be able to count to 10 before he spurts into you - yes, men are that horny at this age and require very little stimulation.

Your vagina is another matter, no matter how good it feels or how horny you are, you will require between three and seven minutes of vigorous thrusting on his part before you climax.

To get him to pay some attention to your female genitalia and heat up your fire to match his, you need to acquaint yourself with his cock and all the extra pleasurable spots. These spots and techniques work whether you're using your hand or your tongue. (Other parts of your body, like feet, breasts and armpits can be used for variation.)

1. Lube him up. If you're going to be using condoms and/or toys, go for water based lube. If not, grab the Vaseline or the baby oil and slather that big boy. That alone will elicit a groan - trust me. Take your time, spread it all around and don't forget his balls and even his asshole. This is a sex organ, not a cake you're icing. There are millions of nerve endings all along the penile erectile tissue and around the anus. All these nerve endings are the beginning and end of his sexual pleasure. If you're using your tongue lubrication is not needed as you will be lubricating him with your saliva.

2. The urethra. Also called the pisshole or peehole is located (you guessed correctly) at the tip of his penis. Firmly grasp the base of the shaft and run your finger or tongue around his urethra. If you use your pinky finger, you can gently insert the tip into the urethra and then slide it in and out. Do this a few times and keep a firm grip on the base of his cock. Here's where the oil comes in although most men will have a dot of precum at the tip of the cock by this point, this means you can use his own juice to stimulate him.

3. The head. This is the red mushroom part at the tip of the cock. It may be a purplish color by now, this is blood filling the head of the cock. The tongue is most handy here, even if you're not going to give him a blowjob, (and please make sure he understands that fact beforehand) the tongue just naturally does a better job of stimulating the head.

By mouth: Open your mouth and take the head into it. Close your mouth around the base of the head. You can now pull backwards pursing your lips and that will put pressure onto the head as you slide it out. Do this until you taste another bit of precum. Do not let go of your grip on the base of his shaft! You can also keep the head in your mouth and swirl your tongue around it. Alternatively you can stiffen your tongue and run it along the underside of his head. A fourth technique is to slacken your tongue and push his head against the roof of your mouth then slip it back and forth in your mouth.

By hand: Palm his head and wrap your fingers around it, pull your hand off slowly keeping up the pressure. You can also stroke the underside of the head with your thumb. Place the tip of his head against your palm and rub all around with flat circular motions. (This technique is the most useful for post orgasm torture.)

4. The shaft. If you watch porn for sex education, the result is going to be sad. What we see in porn is the fastest way to orgasm, not necessarily the nicest. While vigorous stroking is pleasurable, it's the pressure and resistance that is most pleasurable to men. They really do like that foreskin pulled all the way back. You don't have to break a stroking record here, a pace of three seconds a stroke is a good pace to keep him erect but not climaxing. Wrap your free hand around the shaft and stroke firmly. The whole idea when it comes to cock play is to keep one hand wrapped tightly around the base of the penis slowing down or preventing the sperm from entering the penis.

If you're stimulating him with your mouth, take the shaft into your mouth and using your lips, tongue and the roof of your mouth stroke the shaft. Although if you're doing this with your mouth, he's going to be pretty peeved if it isn't going to lead to a blow job; men are funny this way.

The underside of the shaft is more sensitive than the top, apply most pressure and friction here.

5. The scrotum or ball sack. Many men complain that this part of their magnificent and majestic genitalia is overlooked by most women. Guilty, because what do the hairy balls do for us? Nothing. However, this is the sperm factory and where the male orgasm originates, so it's only polite to give it some attention. While your one hand remains occupied at the base of the shaft, use the other hand to caress the scrotum. Again rubbing in circles with a flat palm will elicit groans of pleasure. You're stimulating his balls to release sperm which is the beginning of his orgasm. If you want to use your mouth, the most sensual pleasure is for you to suck the balls into your mouth. One at a time if he's got big balls. A trick to prevent or delay his orgasm in a hands free way is to attach a ball separator at the top of the scrotum fairly early on in proceedings.

6. The anus and rectum. Not strictly cock play but his genitalia are related to his anus. A thumb pressed against the anus or rubbing the anus stimulates all the other nerve endings as well. A finger inserted into the rectum will stimulate his prostate gland. If you are going to do this, insert your middle finger and if he is facing you make a 'come hither' motion with the tip of your finger. If you're behind him, insert your finger and push down with the tip, then slide your finger in and out rubbing over the prostate. For anal play all body parts should be well lubricated.

If you use your tongue, the best technique is to harden your tongue and rub it against his anus. You can alternate between rubbing with a stiff tongue and flicking your tongue around the little bumps of his anus, also called rimming. You can insert your tongue and many people do this because it turns them or their partner on, the sensation is very pleasurable, however the tongue is not long enough (usually, but there are always exceptions) to stimulate the prostate.

Once you have paid attention to all the parts that arouse both of you, the only thing left is bringing your man to orgasm. You can literally pick any part of his genitals and stimulate only that part and he will climax. Which is what you want. And if you've spent a good five minutes playing with him and preventing his climax, he will be aroused enough to cum almost immediately.

Again, this is what you want in order for the most pleasure in penetrative sex. Young horny guys can climax twice, thrice even more before vaginal or anal sex. Of course you could just have vaginal or anal sex four times before he has enough staying power for you to climax. It really all depends on the individual. But older people will tell you, great sex begins with great foreplay.

A note on post orgasm torture: If you're new to the concept, do give it a try. It's not really torture although the BDSM community embrace it. After climaxing the genitals of both men and women are extremely sensitive. Especially the tip of the glans on both the penis and the clitoris. Torture is simply continuing to stimulate these areas after climax. To do this you would continue to lick or stroke the glans gently post climax. It shouldn't be called post climax torture, it should be called irresistible torture. The reaction of the lover receiving such delicious attention can be violent as they involuntarily try to twist the body part away. That's what appeals to the BDSM crowd because to really affect this torture the giver has to tie the receiver up or risk getting a kick or an elbow somewhere. Added to that, bondage is always performed on the submissive party, further increasing the control of the dominant partner.