Cockatoo Pt. 13

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*****

Alex jumped off the bed and disappeared into the bathroom. I must have dropped off to sleep as I woke some time later on, to find Alex sleeping with me spooning up to her back. She was having what sounded like a bad dream as she was almost shouting in an angry tone, 'No, no more, I don't want to do it anymore. Please don't make me do it anymore, no more.' I gently stroked her back and she settled down but then, 'It's not fair anymore, it's not fair, you shouldn't make me do it, everything is different.'

I stroked her back one more time and thought about waking her, but then she settled down again and seemed to slip back into a deep sleep once more. I wondered what had upset her so much, but who knows with dreams?

I must have dropped off again because it was morning when I awoke. Alex was propped up on one elbow looking at me. She was staring intently at me and I said, 'What?'

'Nothing,' she said, 'except you are so beautiful when you are sleeping. I just loved watching you. You looked so calm and peaceful. You look as if you were in a happy place.'

I said,' Right here and now with you is my happy place.'

She gently hit my arm, 'You soppy old romantic,' but I could see she was pleased.

'I see you've taken off the dressings.' She said.

'Yes, the doctor was pleased with the progress and as long as I'm careful it should be OK.' I replied, guessing what was coming next.

'Does that mean you're cleared to fly?'

'Yes, it does,' 'What are you going to do?' she asked, as she twisted her lower lip between her teeth.

'Honestly, I don't know, I have to go back to Bangkok. That's for sure, but I don't know when yet.' She turned away from me, put her hand up to her eyes, slid out of bed and walked over to the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

I got out of bed too, went to the toilet and when I came out, the bathroom door was still closed. I tapped on the door, 'Alex, are you OK? Will you come out please?"

She eventually opened the door and I could see her eyes were red from crying. I reached out for her hand and held it without speaking, just looking at her. Was there some way I could signal to her how I felt about her.

I said something that I would never have thought to hear me say, 'Alex,' I was feeling strangely shy and I looked away as I said to her, 'would you please fuck me?'

She reached out a finger to me and moved my face up so that I had to look at her.

'Oh, baby, if that's what you want, there is nothing more I want right now than to fuck you silly.' She smiled sweetly at me, 'are you sure?'

I nodded my head and she took my face in her hands, pushed my head back and began to lick my neck with long upward strokes of her tongue like a cat. She nipped my ear lobe between her teeth, an exquisite pain. She dropped her head to take a nipple into her mouth, tongue flicking it hard before using her teeth to stretch the nipple taut. She did the same with the other one before moving back up to my lips, biting one gently before kissing me deeply, her tongue invading my mouth.

We kissed for a while, our tongues fencing and I was squeezing Alex's breasts as her hands were caressing my backside. She broke the kiss, grabbed hold of my hand and led me across to the bed. Stopping next to the bed Alex kissed me again, this time dropping her hands to my cock and she began to slowly stroke me. Alex was taking the lead and I felt totally under her control. She pushed my head down so that I could lick and suck her breasts. Her nipples came alive at the touch of my tongue and they hardened immediately into little points.

She took one of my hands and moved it to her cock, which was already beginning to grow in size. I wrapped my hand around the shaft and it began to harden under my touch. I could feel the blood flowing into my own cock and it too began to grow. I was breathing heavily now and I heard myself make a sound deep in my throat as I became more and more aroused. Still kissing me Alex pushed me down flat on the bed and straddled my chest so that her cock was pointing straight at my face.

I first kissed the soft purple tip then opened my lips and took it into my mouth using my tongue to lick and bathe around the head. Alex brought her hands down to the back of my head to ensure her cock stayed in my mouth.

Letting Alex take control of me was exciting; allowing her to lead me and make all the moves made everything much more arousing. It felt liberating for someone more dominant to be in charge. She whispered, 'Turn over, baby, and get on your hands and knees, because I am going to fuck your brains out.' Those words sent a shiver of excitement through me and although I knew what was coming this time, I wanted it so desperately.

I turned over and went down on my hands and knees, it felt kind of demeaning and exciting at the same time to be in that position, head down on the pillow and backside high in the air exposing myself. I felt Alex move up behind me and I jumped as I felt her tongue flick across my rosebud.

She spread my cheeks apart, making me feel even more exposed and vulnerable. The feeling that swept through me as she continued to lick all around my hole was extraordinary. I had never known you could get so much pleasure from there. Her tongue forced its way past the muscle into my hole and I could feel the blood pounding through my head and I felt dizzy with the sensations that were sweeping through me.

I felt her tongue disappear to be replaced by her fingers working lube into my hole. She pushed first one finger and then two inside me and I felt myself wince as she brought a third finger inside. Alex began to move her fingers in and out and I felt both violated and aroused as she jabbed her fingers inside me. I could feel myself as hard as a steel pipe now and she moved her other hand around to stroke my cock. The sensations of her fingers in my hole and on my cock at the same time nearly blew me away. I didn't know whether to push back on her fingers at the back or push into her hand at the front. My brain was at system overload.

Alex finally moved her fingers out and I felt the tip of her cock tapping at my hole. She pushed gently at the entrance and I tensed. She stroked my back and said, 'Relax and push down, baby.'

I did as she said and she poked her cock just to the edge of my hole and then withdrew it and then suddenly she pushed hard past my muscle and she was in. It was painful this time as well and I heard myself grunt as she pushed her cock deeper inside me. It felt easier in this position and the pain eased faster this time. She began to move her cock slowly in and out at first and then began to speed up as I began to push back on her. I bit my lip as the pain increased again but somehow this felt different, her cock filled me and it felt good to be used in this way. I have no words to describe why this was but it just felt right to have her cock inside me and to own me for this moment.

I could feel her cock swell inside me as she moved faster and faster and I could feel her balls against my backside. I felt Alex lean forward and to feel her breasts and hair brushing my back while she was fucking me made me feel delirious. I could hear her grunting as she drove her cock in and out of me and then suddenly she stopped pushing for a moment and then shoved savagely back into me, pushing me hard into the pillow. She paused and then repeated the same savage thrust for three or four times. I could feel her cock expand inside me and then she exploded into me and I could feel her cum pumping deep inside. Alex jerked three or four times as she climaxed and fell forwards on my back and we tumbled down onto the bed. We lay there for a while her cock still hard and inside me. She eventually pulled out and I felt empty as her cock left me.

We lay there trying to recover from what has just happened. Alex leant forwards, wiped the sweat from my eyes and kissed me gently.

'I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did, baby.' She whispered tenderly.

I smiled and said, 'Just let me know when you're ready to go again.'

She roared with laughter stood up and did a crazy little dance, her cock flapping about wildly. It was the silliest and most erotic thing I had seen.

We ate breakfast on the balcony and it was just before 8 o'clock when my phone buzzed with a text. It was from Sam, 'call me asap'

Probably a question about the project I thought. I called and Sam picked up straight away. 'Hi Sam, What's up?'

'Oh, hi James, look I can't talk too much right now, but just wanted to warn you, that bloody journalist has been sniffing around again. He's called the company in Cambridge and asked if they knew that, quote, 'their rescue hero IT whizz is living with a transsexual ex hooker in a Thai brothel' unquote.' The company here hasn't been involved yet but I hear they are throwing a hissy fit in Cambridge.'

'Shit, sorry Sam, you're a star, thanks for the heads up. Not that I can do anything about it from here.'

She interrupted, 'No, but you might want to get across here before the shit completely hits the fan.'

'OK, I'll think about that. Will you keep me in touch if you hear anything else?'

Alex was looking at me, completely bewildered by the conversation and the look on my face as I listened to what Sam had to say.

'What is it, what's wrong?'' Alex was grabbing my elbow as I finished the call with Sam.

I told her what Sam had told me the other day as well as what she had just said.

'Fuck, fuck, fuck. Why didn't you tell me straight away? You should have told me while I was in Bangkok.'

'There didn't seem to be any real threat, I thought that it would die away like everything else does. I didn't think it was urgent enough to disturb whatever it was that you were doing in Bangkok.'

'Oh, really? And what do you think now?' Alex snapped, her eyes blazing.

'Look, there's nothing that you can do about it, is there? It's a grotty little newspaper back in England and even if it does get published, it will be a one minute wonder.'

'Yea, and that grotty little newspaper happens to in the city where we went to University and will get read by the narrow minded little gimps there, whose only pleasure in life is gossiping about who is sleeping with whom, who will tell all their equally gimpy friends on the internet and it will be halfway round the world before breakfast.'

She was now walking around the room and I could feel a storm brewing.

'I have worked so hard to keep myself out of the news and here I am going to be splashed across the press as, what was it? 'A transsexual ex hooker in a Thai brothel' I fucking hate them.'

I began to get angry too, but with her, 'well at least you are a long way away, what are you really worried about, it's no skin off your nose. It won't even make the newspapers here, and if it did, would it make any difference to what you are doing here? It might even get you some free publicity.' Even then I knew that was cheap shot.

'What do you know? You have no idea what you're talking about.' She paused; a thought had just struck her. 'Shit, I need to get hold of Kritsada quickly.'

'Kritsada? What's he got to do with it?' I was confused by this turn of events. 'Anyway, I'm the one who has most to lose here?'

She turned to stare at me, 'What?'

'I'm the one who is going to be a laughing stock. When the company gets through with me I'll be bloody lucky if they keep me on as a cleaner after this.' It finally struck home what this might mean for me.

She shrugged her shoulders, 'So what, you don't like the work anyway. I need to get to Kritsada.'

'So what happens to me doesn't count? What is it with Kritsada anyway? Why is it so bloody important for you to talk to him about this? What is going on between you two?' A thought struck me between the eyes. 'Are you lovers? Is that what this is about?'

Alex stared at me in blind astonishment, 'Let's get this straight, you think Kritsada and I are having an affair? After everything I've done and said about what I feel for you since you got here, you honestly think I am having an affair with Areeya's father?'

I was just wild now, 'It would explain everything, the way you behave around him. And the sudden trip to Bangkok, the instant he tells you to go. That wasn't a request from him to go, that was an order and you just went.'

She shook her head, 'I just can't believe this.'

'It explains everything, the loans, the way you're at his beck and call, everything.' I was gabbling now.

'You need to be very careful what you're saying now. It explains nothing, you know nothing, and it would be better if you didn't know anything.' She was holding herself back now, speaking slowly, her anger cold and threatening.

'What? So I just have to trust you?'

She paused but her eyes slid away from mine. 'Yes, you do. It isn't an affair.'

'Well, if isn't an affair, what the fuck is it? You tell me you love me, but you won't tell me the truth?'

'I told you, you don't want to know the truth, trust me.'

'And if I won't trust you?'

She shrugged, 'Your problem, not mine.'

That was it, I just exploded. The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. 'I wish I had never come.'

Alex sat down, stared at me, her eyes flashing with anger, 'What did you just say?'

'I wish I had never come over here.'

It was like the storm had broken, 'FUCK. YOU. I put my heart and soul on the line for you, I was happy here and I risked all that to see if I could chase a dream.'

I began to see red, what she said wasn't fair, 'Yes and that was totally up to you, wasn't it. It was what you wanted, and I just happened to be on hand and you decided all on your own to take that risk. It's not on me.'

This argument had already spiralled out of control and we were hurting each other without even thinking of the damage our words could do; rage and frustration pouring out of both of us. It was two grown up children fighting in the playground and it was about to get far, far worse.

'Do you really want to know what I did in Bangkok?' she virtually spat the words at me, 'I warned you, remember.'

'Yes I do.'

'I was fucking men for Kritsada.'

It took me a few seconds to register what she had said.

'What did you say?'

'I said, I was fucking men for Kritsada.'

I dropped onto the seat, and tried to make sense of what I had heard.

'What for, I mean, why?'

'It doesn't matter; I am not having an affair with anyone, its business.' She sat down too.

I shook my head, 'What kind of business? I mean, oh, I don't know what I mean. How can it be business?' My head just couldn't bring this all together.

Alex put her head in her hands and said softly, 'It's part of the business deal we have on the loan that Kritsada underwrites for us. I had to agree to provide him with certain personal services so that he can entertain business contacts with certain tastes or I sleep with people so he can get information from them. I warned you that you would be better off not knowing. It was a high ranking British diplomat in Bangkok this time. The blonde kathoey is still in demand' she said the last words with a bitter pride in her voice.

My mind just stopped working for a time as I just could not take all this in. I felt my pulse racing and I thought I would faint.

I finally pulled myself together and said, 'Why do you do it?'

'Simple, Kritsada was the only one who would underwrite our loan for this place. No-one else would give a crazy farang Kathoey and her girlfriend a single Baht without it being underwritten. He agreed to do it so long as he could have his pound of flesh. I told you he was a thug.'

'Why can't you stop?'

'Because he would pull out of the deal immediately. He will not break a contract. There are three years left on the deal.' She sat back in the chair, looking out of the window.

'Does Areeya know?'

She snorted, 'Of course she does. But she can't get him to change it, she's tried, but he says a deal is a deal.'

'So Kritsada pimps you out, is that right?' she flinched as if my words were a whip across her back 'No it's not like that.'

'Then what is it like? Because that's exactly what it sounds like.' I was raging now; having to drag out everything bit by bit was making it so much worse in my eyes.

'And you won't stop?'

'I can't stop. I would lose everything I have worked for, if I did.' She bit her lip and wrapped her arms around herself, 'I have to tell Kritsada about this, he won't like the publicity, he always likes to operate in the shadows and this will not please him.'

'And that's what you're worried about?' I just could not believe how she was reacting to all this. I felt like I was a passenger in an out of control car heading for the edge of a cliff and there was nothing I could do to stop it. In the space of a just few minutes my life had turned into a car crash. I had to get out.

'Fuck, I can't cope with this. I'm going back to Bangkok, to see if I can save my career.'

She shrugged her shoulders, 'Go ahead, but if you leave now, don't ever come back. I won't want to see you again.'

The red mist had descended and all I said was, 'So be it.'

She spun on her heel and walked out the door of the flat and down the stairs.

Three hours later I was back in Bangkok.