Confessions from All Fours

As I'm reading the stories here, I can tell a difference between the stories that reflect real life and the stories that are the fantasy someone came up with. Although anonymous, this must have been a challenge to put out there for other people to read. Good luck with this girl (although I'm not sure what "good luck" would entail in this case).

I liked it -- you spend a lot of time focusing on your character's lack of control and understanding of the situation, but I don't see this as a bad thing -- given the length of time for the seduction, a lot of thoughts *should* go through his head.

I think your protagonist shouldn't be quite so unsure of himself, though. Clearly, he's struggling with a lack of experience and the loss of control, but he's still too focused on the stereotypical gender role -- "do I not measure up?" type thinking. Nowhere do you mention his physical attributes, and I think this is important. So bringing up an insecurity here is counterproductive. It is sufficient for him to simply feel out of control, since that is the focus of the story.

I very much like that you don't focus on details like the size of the strap-on, her measurements, etc. These sorts of details would distract from the point of the story.

During the initial buildup, I did originally feel that it was taking too long to get to the interaction, but later, I felt that this made sense -- it was necessary for him to have a lengthy seduction -- the tension I felt while reading mirrored his tension. I would suggest cutting the initial part down slightly, though, in order to find a better overall balance.

Overall, a good read, and refreshingly different from the jump-right-in-wankfest we see posted so much. I think the story provides a lot of opportunity for follow ons, depending on your goals. Does he work through his uncertainty and find submission comfortable? Or does she continue to string him along through non-discussion only to do something else unexpected (perhaps bondage, possibly humiliation/exhibition but I'm not sure that makes sense)? It really comes down to whether the character grows or not. Growth into becoming a sub would be reasonable, but wouldn't be as interesting (or as challenging to write). To be able to keep your protagonist in his delicate lack of comfort zone would be a real challenge, and would make for great reading. The character can't become comfortable with simply submitting to her, and conversely, he can't seek out other doms (as that is inherently contradictory -- that would mean he would control the situation).

And that is the real dilemma -- how does she keep him in that zone?

My intention when writing this wasn't to write an erotic story per se, but rather to examine the thoughts and feelings in my head and to come to terms with them. So I guess that is why it is so introspective.

As for the other comments, I don't know how she felt about everything or what was in it for her. I wish I did. And yes, in the morning she just shooed me out the door. Nothing else happened.

No, a relationship hasn't ensued, at least not yet. I still work with her and see her most every day, but the subject of our date is not something I've talked to her about since, nor has she spoken with me about it.

I suppose that silence is a big part of the reason I felt compelled to write this all down in the first place.

The story is well-written, except that it leaves too much just hanging out there.

Did her leather harness include a dildo for her? And so she got her rocks off and left him to his own devices?

In the morning, did she just get him hard, and then shoo him out the door? Or was there a repeat of the previous evening?

Did a relationship ensue? Or was that just how she satisfies her kinks, by buttfucking a guy on the first date, and then dropping him.

The story has lots of potential, but just doesn't seem to be completed.

-- KVK

Sorry, I don't vote. Kind of drawn out, with lots of his personal intospection and not much sex. Keep writing.