Contest

That evening Lurlene wandered around the house with her transparent shirt on and her fancy bra. She seemed a little shy but I wasn't about to help. It was an interesting sight as she moved, making her breasts roll in the bra. I guess I saw most of her areolas.

One night, in bed, Lula May said,

"You know, we need a truck."

"A truck?" I asked, "Why?"

"Lurlene is in the beauty contest and needs it."

"Does she?"

"Of course she does."

"Why?"

"She needs somewhere to change and a place to lie down between items of the event."

"Oh?"

"Yes. Every other girl will have one."

"Really?"

"Sure. She needs somewhere to change so it will need to be covered."

"They cost a fortune!"

"I know. It needs to be big enough for a queen sized bed and with room for her to change in."

"That isn't going to be the cheapest truck."

"I know, Sweetheart, but she needs it.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. It will need to be painted on the inside too. Duck egg blue I think."

"I'll think about it."

"I know you will, Sweetheart."

Next morning I was late getting to the shower. I sat and listened. I heard Lula May. "Don't worry Hon. Mary Beth might be blonde but that doesn't mean she has every advantage. We're going to bleach the roots of your hair."

"Can that be done?"

"Sure, Hon."

"Ok."

"I've asked your Father to buy a truck too."

"Have you?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"So you can become Miss Milk Pail."

"How will that help?"

"Hon, sometimes you are so naïve,"

"Why?"

"To become Miss Milk Pail, you're going to be very busy."

"What do you mean?"

"Mary Beth has one already."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Well. We aren't going to be able to influence the judges if we don't have one. There's nowhere in the hall you can influence them."

"Why a truck though."

"So you can have a queen sized bed and drinks cabinet."

"You mean I have to get them drunk and fuck?"

"Just move your leg that way. These new razors aren't so good. Yeah, Hon."

"Do I have to?"

"No, you don't, if you want Mary Beth to win."

"Ok. I'll do it."

"Grandma will be here soon to help."

"Ok."

"My turn." I could hear them change positions.

"You're good with shaving, Lurline."

"Thank you."

"We need to be very fussy today."

"Why?"

"Another interview."

"Why is this one special?

"It's a woman."

"Oh?"

"I know she's gay."

"But you're not gay."

"No, Hon, but it's all good. I need to know how she intends to make her assessments."

"Ok. Can you lean back a little?"

"How do you get to know that?"

"I get them to assess me."

"Do they actually look at our pussies?"

"Not just look, Hon. They make in depth assessments."

"Why? Spread your legs a little wider please."

"Because it's Miss Milk Pail. We don't want a mister becoming Miss Milk Pail."

"Oh."

"It's a clause that has been inserted for your protection."

"It's not the only thing to be inserted, is it?"

"That's true Hon." They laughed, especially Lula May."

"All done, Mum."

"You know, Grandma will be here tomorrow."

"Will she?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"She has lots of experience in preparing for these things."

"What experience?"

"Lots of experience, Miss Cherry Bowl, Miss Nature Girl, Mr. Cherry Popper, Miss Saddle Rug, Mr. Ecopower, Miss Beef on the Hoof, Mr. Beef on the Hoof, Miss Floating Butterfly, Miss Banana Split, Mr. Duck Hunter, Miss Squirting Firecracker, Mr. Barley Malt, Miss Dairy Churn, Mr. Mutton Gun, Miss Sweet Lips, Miss Fruit and Mr. Nuts, Mr. Sheep Dog Whistler, Miss Melons, Mr. Banana, Miss Busy Beaver and they're only the ones I remember. There have been many more."

I thought it best that I get into bed. The thought of my mother in law coming was a little overwhelming.

They were at the kitchen table when I got home from work, talking about contests in general and the naivety of some entrants.

"Some don't even shave their pussies," she said and they laughed. To be honest, I thought that innocence was lovely. "I remember the Miss Stock Whip contest. One of the entrants had so much pussy hair they could have plaited a stock whip from it!" They all fell about laughing. "It wouldn't have been the crack of the stock whip- it would have been the stock whip of the crack!" Lula May was laughing so much that tears were streaming down her cheeks. Men's competitions are different though. If it's a pretty boy contest it's all shaved. There's nothing better for access. If it's a man contest, they get manscaped. I prefer doing men"

"What's manscaped?" Lurlene asked. Lula May and Glorie Sue looked surprised and chuckled at her innocence.

"Well, I don't know either," I volunteered.

"We can show you, Augie," Glorie Sue said. "I'd love to do it." They were all laughing.

"Why not!" Lula May said, tears were rolling down her face with the laughter. Then Glorie Sue explained.

"Darlin', that's when we shave their balls, shave around their pole, shave the margins and trim the rest. It looks good and it's almost as accessible as a total shave."Lurlene was quiet. My balls were tumbling and trembling with the thought. What if there was an accident with the razor?

"Mind you, for Mr. Sea Urchin I did it differently. You know how sea urchins are round and covered with spiky things, I shaved everything but his balls, and trimmed the hair on them to make them look like sea urchins." They were laughing again. Glorie Sue continued, "The judges weren't entirely happy. There were whispers that they couldn't get the feel of his balls on their palates. But he won. The audience was overwhelming in their appreciation of the humor. He deserved to win, risks like that have to be rewarded."

We all sat for a while, drinking our coffees. The quiet felt ominous.

"Have some more cake, Augie." I reached forward and took the last slice."

"We're going to need the table soon." Lula May said. There was more silence.

"I'll go and get my tools," Glorie Sue said. When she returned, she said,

"Well, we may as well get started. Lurlene, can you walk to the door and back please?" Lurlene got up and walked.

"She's got a slight lean to her left," Glorie Sue said. "Can you do it again, please?" Lurlene walked again.

"That's better, much better. Now, can you stand for two minutes please?" Lurlene stood while we all watched. "Hands at your sides," Glorie Sue said. "Now lean forward."Lurlene leant forward. "No, not like that, a lady doesn't stoop, she uses her knees, like this," and Glorie May demonstrated. "Good." Lurlene was warming to it."Now, let's get that top off and walk to the door and back." Lurlene took off her top and started. "Bra too please," Glorie Sue asked.

I made to leave, I was sure my presence wasn't wanted.

"Where are you going?"Lula May asked. "Aren't you interested in your daughter? She needs to be able to perform with an audience."

Lurlene turned and faced us as she slowly undid the clasp and removed her bra. Her breasts didn't slump, they looked magnificent. "Lovely set of tits, I like the nipples. Nice. Beautiful." Lurlene smiled. "Wonderful smile. Now, can you walk to the door and back please? Swing your arms a little, please. Good, I like to see the swell of your tits from behind when you walk. As you swing your arms forward, swing them out a little. That's better. Can you see them, Lula May?"

"I can."

"Now turn and walk towards us. Good. Can you do it again, please?" Lurlene turned and walked to the door again. Glorie Sue watched carefully. As she walked back, towards us, Glorie Sue said, "Very good. Could you see, Lula May?"

"I think so."

"Look at her nipples and see how they are symmetrical against her body. Lots of girls aren't that symmetrical. Now, do it again without your skirt, please." Lurlene took off her skirt. "Panties too,please." A moment of hesitation fleetingly crossed Lurlene's face but she did as she was asked and started walking to the door. Glorie Sue moved for a better view. "Her legs don't touch. Good. Lovely gluteal movement." She started walking towards us. "Her pussy is nicely centered. Some girls favor one side when walking and then their pussy isn't centered. Now, can you walk from there to there, please?" Lurlene went to the first "there" and started walking. "Mmm, good, no pelvic tilt, you've passed the walking tests with honors." Lurlene smiled.

"Now, let's get this table cleared." Lula May did it simply, she got each corner of the table cloth and lifted, I could hear the sugar bowl crash into the mugs, and she took it to the kitchen.

"Up you get. Face down." Glorie Sue was hitting the table with her hand. She watched as Lurlene climbed onto the table, the hang of her breasts and the grace of her movements. Firmly, Glorie Sue ran her hands over Lurlene. She pushed her hands under, pulled both of Lurlene's breasts out and looked at them. "You have to be careful how you lie down, your left breast is a little bit larger and you can look asymmetrical. Lift and we'll tuck them in again. Lurlene lifted, her breasts hung under her and she lowered herself. "Good. That's how to do it." Then, not saying anything she got a big magnifying glass out and went over Lurlene, looking for skin blemishes. With a pen she circled areas of concern. "Ok. I've finished with your back, now for your front, sunny side up please." Lula May stood by as Lurlene turned. Glorie Sue ran her hands over Lurlene. She spent time working out the axis of her breasts as she moved them around. She spread her legs a little and then went down to her toes. A long time was spent looking at each toe. The magnifying glass was next and everything was checked with the circles of concern marked.

Glorie Sue then went to her bag and pulled things out. There was a sheet of plastic with holes in it. She went to Lurlene's breasts and tested the holes until she found one the size of Lurlene's areolas. "I think we'll make your areolas two sizes bigger." Then she pulled out a color chart. "What do you think Augie?" I looked at the chart. I didn't have a clue. I had a thought about sheep being daubed with paint at a market.

"That one?" I asked tentatively. Glorie Sue laughed.

"Yes, if she'd had twenty pregnancies. We're looking for subtlety Augie." Lula May was laughing.

"Which one did he choose?" asked Lurlene. She was shown and laughed.

"Thanks, Dad." Together they chose one that wasn't so much different from her natural color. The hole they'd chosen from the hole chart was placed over her nipples, and, one at a time, they brushed on the color.

"Now, get your knees up girl," Glorie Sue said with an obvious lilt to her voice. "This is my favorite place to work." They all laughed. I made to go.

"No Augie," Lula May said, "Stay here. What do you think you're doing for her confidence every time you try to leave?"

"She's right Augie, you have to be supportive." I stayed. Lurlene watched me.

"Don't worry Dad, it's ok if you watch."

"Thanks, Hon." I tried to look confident.

"Wait till you see her butterfly!" Lula May enthused. I knew it wasn't the kind of butterfly I would automatically think of.

Glorie Sue looked at Lurlene's pussy and studied the way the inner lips protruded beyond the outer lips. She then gently pulled the outer lips apart. The inner lips stayed stuck together. With a little more stretch they opened.

"Mmm, we'll have to use a lubricant. I like them to open before that. At least they are big enough that we have something to work on." With her fingers she opened the inner labia and smoothed them to their sides. Lurlene lay there, anxiously waiting for a comment. Lula May whispered,

"I told you she has a beautiful butterfly." There was silence. Then Glorie Sue said,

"Succulent!"

"Grandma!"

"I'm not going to tell lies Darlin', it is succulent and before the contest is over a lot of people will have sucked it. Let's hope so!" They laughed with Grandma's little joke.

"What do you think, Dad?"

"I think it's beautiful, Hon."

"Is it better than Mary Beth's?" Lula May quickly left and returned with the pictures. They spent time looking at them, making comparisons.

"Yours is much better, Darlin', yours is bigger, your butterfly is better and I think your clit is bigger. Hers is lovely, it's petite but it's not a prize winner"

"Good."

"It's like I said, succulent. Your Mother is right. You have the best butterfly I've ever seen. It's nothing to be self conscious about. It's something to be very proud of. I'm proud of you." There was a silence as Lurlene sighed with satisfaction.

"Now, back to work, I think we can make it even better. Your butterfly is wonderful, it's healthy but for contests it's pale. We'll add a little more color, make it pinker. She got a color chart out and again asked me to choose. I chose a color that was a few shades darker. I wondered what colour I would choose if I were stamping a ram's horn with its identity. I was also wondering why it wouldn't be made green, in keeping with Earth Day.

"Good choice, Augie, you're learning. Lula May chose the same one."

"Can I see, please." We watched Lurlene's reaction.

"Ok," she said as she handed the color chart back. Glorie Sue went to her bag and found what she needed. She put some card under one side of the butterfly.

"Hold this please, Augie." While I held the card she dabbed on the dye. Then we did the same for the other side. It did look pinker. "We have to wait now for the color to absorb, about two minutes." Holding that card, with my arm outstretched seemed like forever. I began to think of how Lurlene was feeling with her knees stretched out to their limit. When the two minutes was up I went and found some pillows to put under her head and her knees.

"Thanks, Dad." Glorie Sue then wiped the butterfly to get rid of any excess dye. It did look good, even if it wasn't going to suddenly take flight.

"Now, the other side." She placed the card and asked me to hold the labia in position with my finger as she dabbed. With more card she asked Lula May to do the same for the other side. While waiting, Glorie Sue got a mirror from her bag and gave it to Lurlene.

"Wow, that looks really good!"

"Edible!"

"Grandma!"

"Well, I hope you're going to be eaten, lots of times, it's wonderful!" Lurlene was laughing, as we all did.

Then Glorie Sue wiped Lurlene's butterfly and looked at her clit. She projected it up and looked at it carefully. From her bag she found a sheet of plastic with holes in it and she carefully found the hole that would suit. Then another color chart. We all watched, fascinated by her craft. I could do it the same color or would you like it a little different," she asked. Lurlene suggested that it be a little brighter than the butterfly.

"You mean, like this?"

"That would be nice." We all agreed. Glorie Sue carefully found the hole and put it over Lurlene's clit.

"Hold this," she said to me. "Push down firmly so we can see all of it." As I held she dabbed on the dye. Two minutes later all was done. Lurlene started to get down from the table.

"Oh, wait, haven't finished yet. One more thing, stay as you are." Glorie Sue gave Lurlene's clit a wipe which made her gasp, then stretched her legs wide, popped two fingers inside and felt around. It took a few minutes.

"All is well," she said.

"Good. Mary Beth won't be winning if I can help it." We all laughed.

"Tomorrow we have to work on flavors and scents."

"Ok. It's your turn Dad."

"Yes," Lula May said, "Why not? It's only skin after all."

"It would be good, I'd love to do it."

"Yes, Dad. I'd love to watch."

"How do you expect Lurlene to do well if she has no support?"

"Then Lula May came to me and whispered in my ear.

"You know, Lurlene has been thinking of making contest preparation her career. It's important that she gets as much job experience as she can." Then Glorie Sue whispered in my other ear.

"Chicken." And Lurlene said,

"Come on Dad, start walking to the door." She was almost begging. I felt terrible as I looked at them. Lurlene was frustrated. Lula May was irritated. Glorie Sue looked smug, as though she'd found my weakness and was prepared to exploit it. She took a deep breath which puffed her chest out and made her tits look enormous. I saw the look of unctuous sanctimony. I decided to go and started to walk to the door.

"Don't slouch. Head up!" Glorie Sue said. I stopped and turned.

"I don't slouch. I said.

"Sorry, you do, you need to put your shoulders back." Lula May added.

"It's true, Dad." I thought a few moments. Then I continued on. At the door I heard Lurlene,

"Now walk towards us." I was turning the door handle but dropped my hand. I slowly turned and started walking towards them.

That's better," Glorie Sue announced, still a little lean to the left but much better. I stood in front of them and said nothing.

"Again," Lurlene said, so I turned, walked to the door and back to stand in front of them again. Glorie Sue gave me a little grin and I gave one to her, I wasn't going to be beaten.

"Shirt off," Lurlene decreed. I took off my shirt and started to walk to the door again.

"You're leaning to the left still." I straightened up. I turned at the door and walked back to them.

"Now stand for two minutes. Hands at your sides," she said. They walked around me. Glorie Sue pushed my bottom in and pulled my shoulders back. Lula May pushed my head back and my bottom to the right.

"That's better, Dad. I think you still have a pelvic tilt. Pants off, please." It seemed so easy for her to say, as though it was a natural progression and with the approving support of her Mother and Grandmother, it was difficult to say no. I slowly undid the belt, trying to find a dignified escape, and Lula May was impatient enough to take over. Both pairs of pants were off in a hurry.

"Door and back, please, Dad." I was self conscious in my birthday suit.

"Still leaning to your left," Glorie Sue said. "You're legs don't touch. That's a big advantage." At the door I stood and unable to turn I started to walk backwards towards them.

"Dad, turn around." I turned and started walking- I'd never been naked in front of my Mother in Law before. She passed judgment.

"The nipples are level. Do you see that, Lurlene? That's good."

"Table please." Lula May was hitting it with her hand. I climbed onto it and lay face down. They went over me, I guessed with the magnifying glass, and I felt the circles being drawn over me. There were a few, not many.

"Turn over please." Glorie Sue sounded authoritative. With the magnifying glass and pen they went over me. I noticed that Lurlene had put on a tee shirt. It extended down to her waist and left her pussy on display. It was lovely, in a way, that she had lost some modesty. I have always wondered about modesty and its uses. For some reason though, I don't mind being a little modest myself.

"You need some facial hair Augie. I think longer side burns would help." They looked at my feet and hands. You need to use hand cream." They looked at my chest. Lurlene had the holes out and they were looking at them.

"I think that one," Lula May said.

"Yes."

"I think that one. "

"No, don't make them too much bigger." It has to be subtle to succeed." Lurlene looked chastened. Then they looked at the color chart.

"That one."

"Yes."

"I think so."

"Can I see please?" I was shown the chart. That one matches you now and we think this one will look good." The color they'd chosen was darker. Lurlene did the job, supervised by her Grandmother. Lying on the table I could only look up and crowded around me blocking a lot of the light were six breasts. The strange thing was that I'd never realized before that Glorie Sue's were as big as they were. They stood and admired the handiwork.