Criminal Minds: Dr Spencer Reid

Spencer was pushed aside as the paramedics rushed in; now that the unsub was securely restrained by the local police. Spencer paced the tiny room as he ran his blood stained hands through his hair. Alexa had to make it. She had to. He felt helpless as he watched one paramedic stick the flawless alabaster of her arm with an IV line. The other was working furiously to slow the flow of blood from the nasty neck wound.

His voice was shaky as he asked, 'Will she make it?'

The older man that was working with the bandage to slow the blood flow shook his head. 'I don't know. It isn't the carotid artery so there is a chance, but we need the helicopter here fast. This little lady needs surgery...now.'

The next few minutes were a buzz of action as they gathered Alexa's unconscious body and raced towards the medi-vac helicopter that had been summoned to take her to the nearest trauma center. Of course, it was the seemingly needless stream of consultations with the local authorities and reports that had to be filed that played most upon his nerves.

In the end, Derek was his saviour. He made the excuse that perhaps he and Spencer should go to the hospital to check on the victim's condition. But the over half an hour long silent drive to the hospital was almost more than Spencer could bare. He rushed through the hospital door flashing his FBI badge and stammering demands for updates upon Alexa Lisbon's condition. Of course, the nurses on duty could tell him little more than that she was still in surgery and would they care to have a seat in the waiting room.

Derek continued to watch his friend pace. He was more than a bit concerned about him. The kid had been through so much: his own kidnapping and drug addiction, years as the custodial caregiver for his mentally ill mother, virtually a life-time without his father even if that relationship was slowly on the mend. He was not certain how his friend would manage if the woman did not make it, but he was even less certain how he would handle the consequences if she did. A super hot pro was way out of his friend's league. If things had been different, Derek might have actually enjoyed the irony; thinking of the 1980's music hit 'My Angel is a Centerfold.'

After what seemed an eternity, the doctor came through the double doors. Derek sighed a bit when he saw the man. For while he looked tired and stressed, it was definitely not the look that was the pre-cursor to the cliché, 'I'm sorry, but we did all that we could.' Moving to stand next to his friend with his hand upon Spencer's shoulder, he listened as the doctor explained that he could not make any guarantees. She had lost a lot of blood, but he thought she would recover. The smile that broke across Spencer's face at those words made him look about like the twelve year old kid that would have suffered so greatly from that cruel trick.

'May I see her?' Spencer pleaded.

'She's going to be unconscious all night and probably most of tomorrow. So I don't think you FBI guys will be able to get much information out of her for a couple of days,' the doctor explained.

Derek stepped in then, 'He is an old family friend and since she doesn't have any real family left would it be possible for him to just check on her before we leave?'

The doctor nodded his assent and led the blood stained young man down the corridor. He had never seen that particular look of distress on the face of an 'old family friend.' His guess was that the young man had a different type of interest in the young woman.

He did not elaborate on the woman's other injuries; the burns that had become infected, the small cuts inside her body, or the other abuses that her body betrayed. But he knew that while it was likely her physical wounds would heal, it might take far longer for her mental ones to fade. Sometimes they never did. He left the young man sitting at the side of her bed in the Intensive Care Unit. He supposed an FBI agent knew better than most about the kind of wounds that never healed.

***

Spencer's head lay against the edge of the bed; his hands wrapped about hers. The dried blood still streaked his hair as the sun began to rise once again in the sky. It was day six...and this time there would be no body to find along the road leading to the Hen House.

Alexa opened her blue eyes slowly. She hurt all over, but her neck especially throbbed in pain. She was surprised at the pain. She did not think that there was pain in heaven; and despite her torrid past she must be in heaven because her angel was sleeping next to her bed. She reached out slowly and brushed the hair back from the face that she had held close to her heart for almost fifteen years. Spencer Reid.

Correction...Dr Spencer Reid. She had followed his career at the FBI. It was amazing what a simple tool like Google would reveal, but time and again when she was lonely or nostalgic she had found herself typing those words into the search engine. She would spend hours catching up on the one person she considered a childhood sweetheart.

It was reassuring that whatever god that ruled the universe had granted her this one mercy in the after life. Even if she should be banished to the depths of hell after wards, these few moments with him would suffice.

Spencer woke to her soft caress. How many times in the intervening years had he dreamt of such a touch from his Alexa? His face scrounged in a pretend smile as he whispered, 'The sleeping princess awakes...'

Alexa tried to smile at his words but the pain cut through her even more. 'Thought...supposed to be...kiss,' she tried hard to mumble past the pain.

Spencer bent forward and placed a reverent kiss on the top of his friend's head then. 'That is when the Prince wakes before the Princess.' He brushed his finger along the nasty bruise that marred her smooth white cheek. 'You should rest now though,' he pronounced with authority and relief.

Shaking her head, Alexa knew that she had to tell him the truth. If she were to spend all eternity in Hell for her sins, this was one that she could no longer bare upon her soul. 'I didn't know,' she whispered with tears running down her bruised cheek.

'Of course, you didn't know. How could you have known that the Ripper was your friend?' he said.

Alexa became even more agitated then. Despite the excruciating pain she shook her head vigorously, 'No...the note...it wasn't me,' she tried to make him understand.

Light began to dawn in Spencer's eyes, but at that moment he was more concerned about her health than some long ago insult. He rang the buzzer and had the nurse bring something to calm her once again. He sat by her bed as she drifted back into a restless sleep.

***

Derek hated to add this insult to injury, but he thought it might be better coming from him. So he stood outside the glass enclosure of the Intensive Care Unit and waved for his friend to join him. He knew this news would be almost as devastating to his friend as it would be to the woman. Even to him, it seemed so unfair.

Spencer looked tired and far older than usual when he finally placed the young woman's hand on the cool sheet and joined his friend in the waiting area. He did not like the look on his friend's face. 'What's wrong? The unsub escape?' he inquired.

Derek shook his dark head. 'Not that.' He searched for words to explain. 'Child Protection has contacted the Bureau. They have placed the children, her brother and sister, with her step-father's brother. In spite of the strong history of violence in the family, they believe they will be able to provide a more stable home for the children than a prostitute, their words not mine.'

Spencer could not believe what he was hearing. He feared that this would be the final blow. With Alexa's health still so precarious, this news could be devastating. 'They can't do it,' he exclaimed although he knew that legally they could.

Derek held out a card, 'Here is the social worker's name and number. Call her.' Spencer nodded as he took the card.

***

Spencer put the final few items into the plastic hospital bag as Alexa reached for her pink sweater at the foot of the hospital bed. The past week Spencer had taken leave from the BAU. He had spent most of his time next to his old friend's bed. He had finally even learned the truth about that day: how her step-father had cajoled her brother and best-friend into the attack. The infamous note had been one that has summoned him to the practice field had been one that she had written the week before to Harper. She believed that the whole thing was less about traumatizing him and more about controlling her. From a profiling point of view, he had to agree with her analysis, but the truth was that it really did not matter to him.

When he was not at the hospital, he was making other arrangements. He had spent several hours at the neat two bedroom apartment she shared with her siblings. He had collected personal items and pictures to make her hospital room more homey. He had even used his considerable boyish charm and the hint of FBI intervention to get the social worker to arrange a visit with her brother and sister. He had even managed a brief visit to Bennington Sanatorium to visit his mother. He had not needed to visit his father; the man had sought him out at the hospital. When he explained his plan to the man that was more stranger than father, he had only nodded his head without making any comment, but he had received a phone call later that day from a family lawyer that was a friend of his father volunteering his assistance.

Derek, who had remained in Las Vegas to watch over him, had been surprisingly silent about the whole thing as well. But he had helped with the arrangements and he had even spoken repeatedly with the social worker. Spencer recognized that Derek's charm was far more seductive to the young woman than his own boyish charm.

Today was the big day: for better or worse. He smiled at the irony; in more ways than one. He helped Alexa into the wheel chair that was mandatory for discharges. He knew that Derek was pulling the black SUV that was on loan from the field office around to the front of the hospital. Looking at his watch he realized that they would be cutting their appointment close...assuming Alexa agreed at all.

Helping Alexa's dainty body into the back of the SUV, Spencer noted that she seemed to have lost even more weight. He was sure that worry about her brother and sister was paramount in her mind. He handed the wheel chair back to the attendant as he climbed into the back of the vehicle with Alexa.

He knew he did not have long to make his case, so turning to his friend he cupped both of her hands in his. 'Alexa, I need to tell you something. I haven't told you this earlier because I was worried about you. And because I have a plan...if you agree.' Looking deep into her blue eyes, he began, 'Child Protection has placed Kyle and Katrina with your step-father's family pending an investigation and court hearing.' He could see the large tears filling her eyes as she tried to draw back her hands, but he was having none of it.

'Let me finish. I said I had a plan. My father is an attorney and his friend is one of the best family law experts in Nevada. Child Protection claims that as practically a single mother without a solid work history you will be forced to return to prostitution. In addition to the moral issues that they are skirting around, they claim that this incident demonstrates that the profession places your life and the children's in danger.' Spencer could hardly stand the dejected acceptance that he saw spreading across her beautiful face. Would she even consider what he proposed?

'Alexa, if you were married and stable then they could not make those claims. Your care of those children has been exceptional. We have Kyle's teachers, the PTA, Katrina's nursery school; all of them will testify that you were always a caring guardian. My dad's friend thinks we can win the case given the history of violence and domestic abuse in that family.'

Alexa shook her head. She did not understand. 'And as Mama used to say...if wishes were horses, then beggars could ride. I'm not married or stable, Spencer.' She stammered as she fought back the tears. She wanted desperately to be alone to think. She was not sure how or if she could get through this latest set-back.

Spencer broke the law and unbuckled his belt. Kneeling before her on the floor of the vehicle, he opened the box that contained the simple diamond cluster and matching gold wedding bands. 'Alexa Lisbon, I know this might not be the right time. I might not be the right man. But would you do me the honor of being my wife?'

Alexa's blue eyes swam in tears. She could not talk. This time it was not the pain that still accompanied each word. It was not even the moisture she saw glistening in her friend's eyes as he knelt before her. It was that she had no words. It was not the proposal perhaps that she had dreamt of as a girl of fifteen. He was not even doing it out of love. She knew it was some warped sense of honor and obligation. But he was wrong about one thing. He was most definitely the right man. The one that all others had been compared against over the past fifteen years.

But she could not let him do this. She could not let him sacrifice his life and career to marry a whore just so she could keep her brother and sister. Shaking her head, she stammered, 'No, Spencer. I can't let you...not for me.' The large crystal tears spilled from her blue eyes down her almost translucent cheeks.

'Then do this for me, Alexa. I have spent hours in that tiny apartment. It felt more like a home than any place I have ever lived. I spend my life with monsters far worse than your friend; many of whom have no excuse for the cruelty they exact from their victims. Then I come home to the bare walls of my beige apartment. There are no pictures of laughing children. They are no hand-sewn quilt on the bed. The fridge is empty; not filled with home-made casseroles. That is my world. I'm much too intelligent to think you could ever love someone like me, but I just want to be part of a loving family like I saw in that apartment. Make me a real home to come back to at the end of it all. Give me that, Alexa.' He paused for a moment as he watched her face, the face that had been for so long both demon and angel. 'That and the friendship we once shared is all I ask. In return, I promise we will find a way to keep them.'

Alexa could hardly breathe at the moment. Her throat that had remained tight and swollen was choked with the tears that ran freely down her face. How could she explain the other? How could anyone like her angel and hero understand not just the atrocities of those few days, but the slow loss of her soul in that place? How could he understand the stains that made her unworthy for even such a simple offer? Despite the movie 'Pretty Woman' whores did not have happy endings. And she was a whore. She had sold her body more times than she wanted to count, although her savings account gave a decent estimate. He deserved so much more than she could ever be.

Perhaps if she had had the courage that night to knock on the door; to explain to the young boy he had been. But she had not. Instead she had thought she was doing more to protect him by transferring lab partners and keeping her distance. When he left a few weeks later for university without another incident, she had thought it was the right choice. But the path that choice had taken her upon had led to this moment...and a choice that she knew she would regret for the rest of her life. 'I can't ...' she tried to say through the tears as the vehicle pulled to a stop.

When his friend that she had come to know was named Derek opened the door, they were not at her apartment complex. They were at the Elvis Wedding Chapel. She could not help but laughing through the tears as she whispered, 'You remembered.' She had long ago shared over a particularly nasty chemistry experiment that involved sulphur when she got married she wanted a traditional Vegas wedding complete with the King.

Spencer nodded as he tried once more to convince her, even as he felt her slipping once more from his life. 'Please, Alexa, if not for me, then do it for your brother and sister. You know they don't belong with his brother and wife,' he pleaded as he pressed the picture of the three of them taken at Circus Circus into the palm of her trembling hand. The three smiling faces that stared out of that picture deserved to be together.

Alexa looked down at the cherubic round face and curly black hair of the little girl that she had raised since she was a baby. But it was the troubled dark eyes of the angry young man that would soon be entering puberty that held her. What would he learn of respecting women if he remained with his father's family? Would she not be sentencing him to repeat the cycle of domestic violence that he had witnessed virtually since his birth? For the past almost three years she had used every psychological technique she had learned to try and reach him; to break the cycle of violence as they called it.

In the end, it was those eyes and the soft brown ones that knelt in front of her that persuaded her. Her answer was a simple nod. She was completely exhausted from her first outing since the kidnapping and even more so from the symphony of tragedies that had brought her to this time and place. And this man/boy that was both her past and her future. As she placed her hand into his, she sent a prayer towards heaven that he would never regret this grand gesture. She promised herself that she would do all within her to give him the 'real home' he needed. It was the least she owed him.