Cultural Diffusion Ch. 08

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CoCoNiy101
CoCoNiy101
751 Followers

"I'm staying at the hotel tonight." Was all she said before she got out of her seat and rushed toward the exit, leaving Alejandro hurt at the table. She waved for a cab and didn't think twice about getting in. Luckily, the hotel hadn't cancelled her reservation since she was supposed to be staying for 3 months.

When she got inside, she had no control over the tears that ran down her face but they came full force. So she gave into them and laid her head on the pillow of the bed until a headache had formed and sleep came over her.

"Happy Thanksgiving Pat." Kat said through the receiver.

"Thanks baby, how is everything going?" She asked in her shaken voice. Kat looked around her small, unfurnished apartment right outside of Buenos Aires and fought a sigh of disappointment.

"Well, I moved into my new apartment a few weeks ago. Rosalina really likes it here." Kat replied. A picture of her beautiful daughter filled her thoughts when she said her name.

"Oh that's great. Where is my precious baby? I need more pictures too." A frown formed on Kat's face when she realized Pat had never seen Rosalina in person. Money had been tight since she first married Alejandro and now that they had divorced, they were even tighter... for her.

"I'll send you some soon. She's spending Thanksgiving with Alejandro and his family." That was something she envied. She'd never be able to give her daughter that kind of experience here in Argentina. Alejandro's family was huge and always got together for celebrations that Kat never felt right attending.

"Oh... how is he and his wife?" Pat asked with a distaste in her voice. Kat sighed heavily, still feeling the betrayal in her heart.

"They're alright I guess. His kid's seemed to have forgotten about me so I guess they're happy to have their real mother back in their lives." Kat replied with no signs of remorse, jealousy or hatred in her tone. In fact, she was somewhat happy that their relationship worked out, for the sake of Maribel and Diego. But what about her own daughter Rosalina?

"Kat you don't know how angry that whole situation makes me! And I actually liked that momzer." Pat said in a hurtful voice.

"I know, me too." Kat replied, almost a whisper.

"Alright bubbala, Harry is almost done with carving the turkey. I'll call you later."

"Oh okay, tell everyone I said hello and I miss them." She said, feeling her chest tighten. She wished she and Rosalina could spend Thanksgiving with Pat, her kids, nieces and nephews, all of whom Kat had grown to miss hanging out with. But instead she was sitting alone, in an empty apartment.

"How the hell did I get myself in this situation?" She thought. Then she remembered the day she agreed to spend the rest of her life in an unknown country with a boyfriend she had only known for 3 months.

Kat woke up drenched in sweat. Her heart was racing and it was felt throughout her entire body. But her stomach signaled an emergency and she raced to the toilet to vomit inside. After brushing her teeth and patting her face with water, she stripped down to nothing and tried to fall back to sleep. But the thoughts and questions of her dream had her wondering what message it was trying to send.

Is that what she's afraid of? Things not working out and being stranded?

*****

"Good morning, do you have an international phone I could use?" Kat asked the front desk of the hotel. The woman smiled at her peacefully before she answered.

"Yes, there is one right over there you can use for a small fee." She pointed to a phone in the corner and Kat nodded.

"Okay great, thanks." She replied. She sat in the nearby chair and dialed Pat's number. She needed to talk to her.

It rang a few times but then she answered and Kat sighed in relief.

"Hello?" She asked pleasantly. Kat opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. She then tried again but only managed to sound strained.

"Hey Pat, It's me." She replied. Pat's brow furrowed on the other line at the sound of her voice. She could already tell there was something wrong.

"Hi honey, what's going on?" She asked. Kat vowed to herself she wasn't going to cry during this phone call but the tears were already trying to break the façade.

"Oh nothing, I just wanted to tell you I'm coming home tomorrow." She said. Pat sat quiet on the other line and Kat toyed with a ring on her finger out of nervousness. After 1 minute of silence, Pat finally spoke again.

"Katty Pooh, why are you coming back to New York? Did you two break up?" She asked.

"I live in New York Pat and no, we didn't. We were never together." Kat replied, trailing off toward the end of her statement.

"I can hear it in your voice; you don't want to leave. What's going on—talk to me shiksa." Kat sighed heavily.

"I don't know. I just don't feel like staying is a good idea. I don't want to be locked here in case things don't work out the way I think they will." She replied. "I'm so confused." Kat whispered, putting a hand over her eyes in frustration.

"What is there to be confused about? You two love each other, it will work out. And you'd never be locked there, you're a smart and beautiful girl who will always have options in life, fershtay?" Pat asked in a stern voice.

"Yes I understand." Kat said.

"Okay, good. Just talk to Alejandro about everything, everything Kat. Make sure you tell him how you feel. Don't be shy, he deserves to know. My advice is that you stay there. But of course, you'll do what you want in the end."

"Thanks Pat." Kat said sarcastically.

"Alright baby, I love you. Talk to you later."

"Love you too." Kat said before she hung up the phone.

****

Kat placed 3 hard knocks on the door before she took a step back and rang her fingers out in front of her. The door opened within the next few seconds and Alejandro appeared. He looked aggravated, annoyed, disgusted and angry, all in an expression Kat had never seen on him before and one she never thought she'd see when he laid eyes on her.

"I came for my stuff." A small look of sadness flashed across his face before he stepped aside with a huff of exasperation to let her through. Kat stepped in carefully and was glad to see the kids weren't around. She hastily made her way to the bedroom and began gathering her things from the drawers, bathroom, floor and anywhere else.

Alejandro's presence was still felt in the room and she turned briefly to see him standing in the doorway, watching her scramble for her things. He felt as if things were moving in warped speed. The love of his life was packing up to leave him.

"Are you going to speak to me before you leave?" Kat almost hadn't heard him. Pat's words were suddenly a heavy weight on her conscious and she convinced herself he deserved to know what was on her mind.

"Close the door." She mumbled. He did so hastily and sat on the edge of his bed. Kat took more time to settle beside him yet still made sure to put a good amount of space between their bodies. Unconsciously, her hands rubbed up and down the length of her thighs.

"I'm scared." She didn't even sound like herself. The words were hushed and almost inaudible.

"Of what Kat?" Alejandro asked, already wanting to gather her into his arms. But he restrained the urge to comfort her, not wanting to mess up the moment of confession. Finally hearing what exactly was on her mind was out of the ordinary.

"Of things not working out I guess." Alejandro sighed.

"It would be just like any other relationship. Sometimes things don't work out but you try your best to make it work. If it doesn't then, you just move on." He said everything so casually as if it were really that easy. Kat found herself enraged.

"Are you serious? I don't have extended family. I have nothing except for Pat and what she's given me which is all 5,000 miles away from here. If things don't work out, I can't just pick up and 'move on'."

"I love you, and I know you love me; so is that not enough to make things work out? Kat, I think you're scared of change. You're scared of a long term commitment that's other than what you know. But you know I'd never hurt you. I want to see you happy, preferably with me. If you ever felt I was doing wrong by you, I'd try my hardest to change. I wouldn't let us fall apart." Alejandro didn't notice when he leaned in to match his lips with hers. He just wanted to feel her body against his in some way.

"Alej—" Kat whispered, her body giving in to the scent of his hair.

"Tell me you'll think about it." He whispered. His soft breath lingered over the skin of her neck and Kat couldn't speak momentarily.

"I'm leaving tomorrow." She replied. She jumped at the bass in his voice when he spoke so close to her.

"Say goodbye to the kids and leave Kat. If you aren't willing to think about it then the option to stay here with me isn't available anymore. I don't want to pressure you into doing what you don't want to do." His statement hurt more than it should've. But still, she got her suitcase and headed out the bedroom door to find the kids.

She headed to Diego's room first. He was just laying down in bed, almost asleep. Kat sat on the edge beside him and they looked into one another's eyes for a few seconds.

"I'm leaving honey." Kat whispered. He seemed to understand the nature of her words, and sat up in bed to wrap his arms snugly around her neck. She smoothed a hand over his back a few times before she laid him back into bed and tucked him in. She put a kiss on his forehead and closed the door behind herself. She took a deep breath and hoped saying goodbye to Maribel would be that smooth.

She however, was asleep and Kat wondered whether or not she should wake her. But she didn't want to just disappear on her without a word. She gently stirred her awake.

"Mari baby, I'm leaving." Kat whispered. She gave Kat a hard stare that she tried to read. But she couldn't see any emotions behind it. Maribel's eyes were blank and empty in the dim room.

"You okay baby?" Kat asked her. She gave a slight nod of her head and Kat furrowed her brow.

"Tell me how you feel." She purposed, just wanting to know what was going on behind that blank stare. She didn't speak right away, but Kat was patient. The feel of things not moving so fast and having to actually wait was refreshing to say the least. But she never spoke again.

"It's alright if you don't want to talk to me." Kat whispered, standing to put a kiss atop her forehead and on both cheeks. "I love you." She told her right before she left.

"I love you too." She said as Kat headed out the door. Kat gasped and her breath caught in her throat. She looked at the girl in the darkness and tried to give her a smile. But her heart was aching. She slowly strolled out of the room and stood at the doorway which gave a clear view of the house.

A strong memory of her first visit washed over her and somehow she noticed all the small things about her surroundings. Alejandro's hopeless attempt to modernize his cozy house was the first thing she noticed. Then she took in the small pictures of his twins sitting in small frames. Alejandro came out of his bedroom gradually and came to stand before Kat. He towered over her yet still made no contact with her eyes.

"Here." He said, handing her a small picture of him, Diego and Maribel. He held them both in each arm while he kissed Diego on his forehead lovingly with Maribel smiling happily in the camera. Kat swallowed roughly and stared into the photograph.

"Thanks." She croaked.

"This too." He said, then handed her the engagement ring. She didn't have a reply, but Alejandro didn't wait for one.

"I called you a cab, it's outside." The way he stated that seemed so cold. Kat looked up at him with an expression of hurt, but swiftly looked back at the picture to hide it. She nodded and Alejandro maneuvered around her to widely open the cracked door.

She turned to face him with pleading eyes and she was sure she looked as hopeless as she felt. This was what she wanted. But hurting them so badly wasn't.

"I'm so—"

"Don't." He barked. "Do not apologize to me." He mumbled. Kat let her tear slide down her face and she stepped outside the door. Somehow she ended up facing him again. The cab honked loudly, but she didn't pay it much attention.

"Alright. Well I'll call you when I get home." She whispered. Alejandro crossed his arms over his chest and looked down on her with flared nostrils.

"I don't want to speak to you Kat." He shrugged his shoulders. " There is nothing we could ever talk about." She knew that. These past few weeks, there was nothing she could ever say to lessen the elephant always in the room. The casual conversation they used to have about America, Argentina, music, teaching and food was no longer available as a topic for them. Her departure seemed to be all they could ever think about. So now that she was leaving, there were no words for either of them anymore. Kat felt the signature stinging in her throat and tried to swallow it down.

Kat opened her mouth to say something else, but she couldn't think of anything else that would further extend this already prolonged goodbye. So she turned on her heels and continued down the hall. When she heard the closing of his apartment door, she jumped and yelped softly at the same time. She stole one more glance at the photo before she slipped it in her back pocket and stuck the ring in her carryon.

The cab driver stepped out to help her with her bags. She didn't want the man to see how shaken and disoriented she was.

"I got it, thank you." She said nicely. He sat back in the driver's seat while she loaded her bag in the back seat. Kat was thankful the ride back to the hotel was short.

As soon as she stepped her foot inside the hotel room, her sobs caught in her throat and she stumbled to her bed. But a new feeling took place in her pit and she went rushing toward the kitchenette sink. Kat groaned then thoroughly rinsed her mouth; her anxiety was really taking its toll on her body. She found her way back to bed, set her alarm clock and went back to sleep.

"I love you. Kat, do you know how good you make me feel?" Alejandro asked her. His brown eyes masked her entire vision but she had no intentions on seeing anything else. His face held a few wrinkles, and his curly hair had many grays. He looked as if he was in his mid 40's, yet still, he was fine.

"No baby, tell me." She smiled mischievously and he returned it. He nibbled on the side of her neck, right before sucking on it hard, marking her with his lips. He cradled her in his arms and somehow they ended up falling backwards. But the feeling was so exhilarating, it only added to the butterfly feeling in her core.

Kat stirred awake only 2 seconds before her alarm clock signaled her to wake up. She turned on her side to press the snooze button and sighed at the 4:00 am sign it displayed. She got dressed in jeans and a button down, combed her hair and slipped on some flip flops. Her bag was already packed so she had some time to make a quick cup of coffee.

She sat on the small chair beside the kitchenette and sipped on her beverage. She wound her face up in a expression of distaste. The coffee tasted so differently to her, and she no longer had a taste for it. She spit out the sip already in her mouth and poured the rest out. She made sure to steal a glance at her photograph and put it in her pocket before she stepped out the hotel door and waited for a cab.

Kat took in the scene before her for the last time. The crisp clean air, upbeat undertone and happy quality. Even though it was almost 5 in the morning, everything seemed perfect.

***

When she arrived at the airport, the environment was rushed and busy. Everyone was moving hastily to their destination and she quickly caught up pace. She got her bag checked by TSA and found a bathroom to use while she waited for her flights. She was lucky enough to get a handicapped bathroom, and she hung her carry on

She used the bathroom quickly then washed her hands at the sink. While drying her hands she took a glance at her reflection just as she had on her first day. She sighed deeply and ran her wet hand over her face. Kat allowed the water to sit on her face for a minute before wiping it off.

On her way to her terminal, she decided to just walk around and take her time. She went around into different shops and window shopped until her feet ached. Then she took her place in the area specifically for her flight.

She sighed heavily, and looked around her terminal. There was a small woman dress fairly formally. She was chatting on a cell phone with a businesslike demeanor and a laptop sat on the empty chair beside her. Kat looked around the room again and spotted two teenage girls, no older than 17, both taking a nap. It seemed as though they just so happened to both fall asleep, but Kat made a mental note to keep an eye on their things for them while they slept.

She moved on to a Hispanic couple that had just taken a seat not too far away from her. A beautiful long haired woman held two baby girls in her arms while a strong man rolled their luggage. The babies cooed quietly, and Kat couldn't resist the smile pulling at her lips while she watched them. The sight made her want to see h her 2 most favorite kids.

She scooted up off her chair and reached into her back pocket with a warm sensation of anxiousness. She couldn't wait to see their faces on that thin piece of paper. But her mouth parted wide when her hand touched the bottom of her pocket and she didn't have the photo in her hands. Without even thinking, she jumped out her seat and searched her area. It wasn't there. She snatched her carry on fiercely and began walking down the hallways where the different stores were.

She retraced her steps, into each store and back out with her eyes glued to the floor. When she got back to the bathroom and still hadn't found the photo, a feeling of pure anguish coursed through her veins. She placed her cheek against the tiled wall and breathed deeply, embracing the comfort it gave her.

That was the only thing she had to remember their faces. The closest thing to looking into Alejandro's brown eyes and melting from his beauty. The only way she'd ever be able to imagine how Maribel and Diego would look after 10 or 20 years of life. She now questioned the reality of it all. It felt as if everything had been a dream now that she didn't have that photo. She'd have no proof of the life she lived in Argentina with Alejandro. Kat's knees went weak below her and she sat on the floor for a mere 5 minutes.

"The New York flight to LaGuardia is now boarding." Kat surprised herself when she made no attempt to board that plane. She couldn't leave. In a swift movement, she stalked out of the bathroom and threw her bag over her shoulder. She took the journey to the exit in half the time it took her to get to where she was even though she seemed to be walking pretty fast.

She ran out the door and immediately flagged down a cab. It stopped before her and she jumped in quickly. She creased her brow and realized she had no idea where she needed to go. She just needed to see Alejandro. So she told the driver his address, and he picked up her radiance of urgency.

Kat racked her brain of all the possibilities. He told her she no longer had a spot in his life since she was so dead set on leaving him. Would he take her back now? He had to. He loved her. She rang her fingers out hard, making the underside a bright red.

Her stomach dipped when she pulled up to the apartment. His car wasn't outside. She looked at the dashboard and found it was only 7:30 am. She would still try it anyway.

CoCoNiy101
CoCoNiy101
751 Followers