Fuck, thought Elaine. I'm never going to get to cum. She swallowed, hoping she'd soon calm down. "Yes, Sir," she typed. "Looking up at you and listening."
"Chuckles. Sometimes I get a bit 'single-minded', little one."
Elaine wasn't sure what he meant, but she loved what he called her. "That's okay."
"Climb onto my lap. You are relaxed and content, cuddling in my arms. Your legs are open just a little and you can feel my hand resting on your thigh."
Elaine realised she was swinging her knees back and forth and she bit her lip as she typed, "Smiles up at you."
"Have you had a good day?" he asked.
Elaine didn't know where to start. "It's been so weird."
"I'm looking forward to hearing all about it."
"Yes, Sir."
"And don't worry about your journal tonight."
Elaine had forgotten all about it! "Thank you," she typed, feeling a bit guilty.
"Seeing as I'm an hour early, you probably haven't had the chance."
"Actually, I hadn't remembered it yet." Elaine sent a frown.
"Hey," Gary typed. "You might have. Anyway, it's okay. Everyone slips up now and again."
"I'm sorry, Sir." Elaine chewed her lip some more as she watched Gary type.
"You know, one of the first things I'm going to do is spank you. You are too adorable to go 'unspanked' for one minute longer than is necessary."
"Sir!"
"Are you saying you're not adorable?" He sent the face with the tongue poking out.
"No. I just..."
"Chuckles and kisses your forehead. Relax. Talking about 'spanking' has reminded me of something. I'd like you to look over your BDSM Checklist and let me know if you make any changes."
Elaine thought that was a good idea. "Okay. I will."
"Good girl."
She recrossed her legs before typing, "I don't feel like a good girl." She followed her message with a blushing face. Her perspiration was accumulating on her top lip and she drew her finger across it, gathering the sweet sweat and sucking it off.
"Are you all right?"
"I'm just 'on edge', Gary. I'm sorry."
"Tell me what's going on."
Elaine thanked God they were going to get to talk about this. She took a deep breath. "I told you that 'telling me I couldn't cum' would make things really hard. Well, I'm going crazy."
"Such little self-control."
"I've been good! I just can't get the idea out of my head."
"All right."
"I must be radiating sex or something. Even my roommate is coming onto me. I need to cum so badly and I'm getting all confused and my schoolwork is suffering. When I woke up this morning my jaw was tired from clenching my teeth all night!"
"Your roommate is coming onto you?"
"Yes!"
"And you're wet?"
"I've been wet for two days. Please let me play before I see you. I promise I'll try to control myself, but if I really can't stop myself, 'knowing I can' would be so helpful." Elaine gulped. "Please?"
"You realise you're begging me to allow you to play with yourself." He sent a wink.
"Blushes."
"You're acting like a horny little slut, aren't you?"
"Pouts and nods. And you won't believe what's been going on with Kendra."
"Tell me what happened."
Elaine sighed and began typing, describing the strange incidents, even admitting her bizarre thought of having her roommate get her off. Gary chuckled when she told him about the dropped towel incident and Kendra's meek response when Elaine put her foot down. She also confessed that she thought if she had the chance, she'd be playing two or three times a day. The effect of denying the chance to play had an exponential effect on her need. It hadn't been expected. She knew it was going to be hard, but she hadn't thought it was going to make her go cross-eyed.
"Chuckles. Okay, Okay. Relax and listen to me. I want you to remember something. You have not formally submitted to me in any way, shape or form. At the moment, our motivation is simply voluntary. We are enjoying each other, and we do things because we want to. That's all. I was never going to stop you masturbating. Nor would I punish you if you had broken our deal."
"You wouldn't have?"
"Nope."
"I've been tearing my hair out all evening over this."
"Chuckles." He sent the face with the big grin. "Poor baby."
The relief Elaine felt was palpable. Her muscles relaxed and her body flushed head to foot. With the mental shackles removed, she briefly tweaked her aching nipples, causing her breath to catch in her chest. She realised what she was doing and quickly typed, "I'm sorry, Sir. I'm sure it'll be easier after the weekend."
"We'll see." He sent a warm smile. "In the meantime, you can put on your nipple clamps under your sweater. Go get them."
Elaine sent the surprised face with the mouth gaping open!
"Don't make me wait," Gary urged, sending a grin.
"You're mean."
"And you're being teased. Now scoot. When you get back, I'll send you that surprise I promised."
"Be right back." Leaping from the chair, Elaine raced over to her wardrobe and grabbed the clamps. Thankfully she remembered to get a towel. She knew she was going to need it.
It was strange being reminded that she hadn't actually submitted to Gary. She felt that in so many ways, she already had. It was true that he was playing with her already. And she loved it. But he hadn't pushed her at all. He was right. And she was pleased about it. She knew she could choose to do, or not do, anything she liked. She didn't want to choose to play. Not after she'd promised. She sighed.
I 'wanted' to please him. That's what I chose. That's how easy it was. I just chose. Two more days. That's all.
Fuck.
Two days!
In moments she was back at her desk and shaking like a leaf. "I have them, Sir," she typed. "But can I say something first?"
"Sure, little one."
Elaine blushed. "I want to hold up my end of our agreement. I won't play until I see you."
"You might want to change your mind after we're done here." Gary winked.
"No I won't!" Elaine giggled as she typed, "Pouts."
"Okay. I'm impressed. And I'm looking forward to being with you a lot."
"Blushes."
"Now pinch your fucking nipples till they're nice and hard then pop the clamps on lightly. You can leave them on longer that way."
In a minute Elaine's heart was thumping and so were her nipples. The clamps weren't that tight. It was like her nipples were being held. Her pussy was so wet it was ridiculous. She swallowed and typed, "They're on."
"Good girl. I'll send you the surprise. I'll email it. Please read it, then we'll talk about it."
In moments Gary's email arrived. Nervously Elaine opened it and found it was a short note with an attachment. The note simply said, 'Here is our draft contract. Please review it and we'll talk about it. Gary.'
Elaine shook with a mixture of awe and trepidation. Things were getting serious. They'd ratcheted up another level. With a trembling hand, she manoeuvred her mouse and clicked it open.
And she read it.
Chapter 20
Dated this day, the 5th of May, 2006
For the purpose of providing a framework over which both parties have equal control, this contract informally binds the signatories below to its contents. Either party may 'opt out' of this agreement at any time. 'Opting out' may be defined as ceasing to observe this contract in any way. It is binding only insofar as it is accepted to be.
Gary Paul Duke (known in this contract as 'the Dominant'), hereby offers Elaine Milanovic (known in this contract as 'the Submissive'), his guidance and dominance over her, for the period beginning on Friday the 5th of May 2006, up to and including Sunday, the 7th of May 2006.
During this period, the Dominant agrees to:
1. Use his knowledge and experience to provide a safe, sane and consensual environment in which the Submissive may learn and grow,
2. Treat the Submissive with respect and tenderness where appropriate, mindful of the gravity of the decisions that have brought her to this moment in her life,
3. Teach the Submissive, through question and answer sessions and by practical demonstration, how to please the Dominant and how to become a more pleasing submissive in general,
4. Communicate with the Submissive to the best of his ability, keeping her informed of the choices he is making in regard to her, and
5. Discipline the Submissive in a consistent, measured and proportional manner, where appropriate and with her inexperience in mind, and only where the Submissive explicitly accepts the nature, scale and scope of the said discipline.
During this period, the Submissive agrees to:
1. Be pleasing to the Dominant,
2. Show proper respect to the Dominant,
3. Acquiesce to the Dominant's will, where and when said will is exercised in a safe, sane and consensual manner,
4. Be honest and openly communicate with the Dominant, and
5. Use her safe word, 'Pineapple', when, and only when, the safety, sanity or consensuality of a given scene is in question.
We the undersigned accept the roles of 'Dominant' and 'submissive' as we choose to define them, and in full knowledge of their meaning to us.
This contract is entered into voluntarily.
By the time she'd finished reading, Elaine was trembling. At the bottom of the contract were two dotted lines where she and Gary would sign. Right under where she was to sign, her name appeared in bold type, and below it, 'Submissive'. The words caught her attention and she was sucked into the vortex of their implications.
She stared at them, unnerved by their physical proximity to each other, stunned by the realisation that this was actually happening. In the most civilised of ways, a legalistic contract, the point of no return had been mapped out before her. She'd be signing her name as 'Elaine Milanovic. Submissive.' The words on the screen swirled and shimmered as thoughts danced through her mind.
Have I forgotten anything? Is there something I haven't done? Something I haven't checked?
When Elaine blinked, welled up tears unexpectedly spilled over her cheeks. Reaching for a tissue, she smiled ruefully and shook her head as she dabbed her eyes.
"Are you finished reading?" Gary asked.
Elaine sighed before responding, "Yes. I'm sorry, I was just thinking."
"That's okay," he typed. "Remove the clamps."
"Yes, Sir. Thank you."
She'd actually completely forgotten about them. From previous experience she expected the worst when she took them off. Gritting her teeth as they came free, she instead gasped aloud as her teased nipples throbbed lewdly. Her eyes fluttered closed and she swayed with the unstoppable sensations, her hands gently holding her breasts through her sweater. The painful heat she experienced last time was quickly forgotten. Suddenly conscious of how long she'd been distracted, Elaine's eyes shot open.
Gary had asked, "Are you all right?"
"Yes," she typed nervously, collecting herself. "I mean, I don't know. It's... It's starting to get very real."
"Do you have a microphone?"
"Sorry?" She wondered if her last message had gone through.
"You know, like a microphone and headphones for the computer? I'll show you 'real'." He sent a wink.
"Oh." Elaine liked listening to CD's while she studied and had a set of headphones. She'd never had need for a microphone. She let Gary know and he told her to fetch the headset and she did. When she returned, he sent a request to begin an 'audio conversation' and Elaine flushed as she clicked 'accept'. For a few moments the program hesitated as it connected. Then it crackled and fell silent. Elaine held her breath.
In his smooth, deep voice Gary asked, "Can you hear me?"
Elaine panted and typed, "Yes!" She had to fix her typing errors twice! On one word! She hastily sent a smile as a shiver of pleasure raced down her spine and wrapped itself around her tailbone.
"Good," he said, the smile apparent in his voice.
Elaine tried to concentrate, but the sound of Gary's voice in her ears was almost overwhelming. Her skin was coming alive, and fast. Goosebumps broke out down her arms and legs and her swollen nipples grappled for her attention. Before she had a chance to type anything, Gary was talking again.
"I'd like you to get a microphone one of these days."
"I'll be so nervous talking to you like this," Elaine typed. Gary sounded so calm. She wished she were more like him sometimes. Besides, Elaine liked being able to type. At least she could think before she opened her big mouth. It would be different when she was kneeling in front of him. She shuddered. Remembering the thin walls of her apartment, she managed to type, "I'd have to whisper."
"Then buy a good one or I won't be able to hear you."
"Okay." She sent a smile. "I will."
"Good girl. Now, about this contract," Gary continued.
"Yes, Sir," Elaine responded, this time more quickly, trying to keep up with him.
"Remember it's symbolic. It's a 'statement of intent' rather than a bona fide contract."
"I understand Sir," Elaine sent. "I mean, thank you. I don't have any issues with it. I like it and I'd be happy to sign it."
"If?" he asked, leaving the word hanging.
"...If I was sure 'the lifestyle' was right for me." Sometimes she felt certain, while at other times she questioned whether she could handle the entire scenario. For Elaine, one core issue remained. 'Was she truly submissive, or had she convinced herself of the 'fact'?' The concern was set to dog Elaine for the next twenty-four hours until she signed the contract. Until that moment, she couldn't really know.
Gary's voice was warm but firm as he spoke deliberately. "It is right for you."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because you've pursued it vigorously from the day you discovered it," Gary said softly. "It's no longer a curiosity or a whim or a kink. It's a full-blown desire to know the freedom of giving the gift of your submission. It's a longing for a relationship with a level of trust you can find nowhere else."
Gary was on a roll now, and Elaine sat listening, remembering some of his lessons as he reiterated them. "You are very lucky. On the net, most potential submissives that make the mistake of allowing themselves to be raced off by the first guy that comes along with a 'Dom' sign around his neck, end up with someone as inexperienced as they are. They don't read up on what to expect and they rush headlong into something that may bear little resemblance to safe, sane and consensual D/s. Disillusioned, they retreat into erotic literature and daydreaming of what it could be like in a perfect world, never having had the opportunity to discover that it exists. The luck involved in meeting each other in the first place, then living so conveniently close to each other in the second, is substantial. For both of us.
"You see, this isn't a one way street either. I have recognised that you have been busy wrestling with the concepts of submission, D/s, and whether or not I am the right one to introduce you to the lifestyle. But I've been busy too.
"I've made sure you were serious because I'm not about to waste my time with someone who is seeking a thrill or whose heart isn't in it. I've made sure you are 'in the range' of submissive that is most likely to please me. To me, your submissiveness is obvious and I've never questioned your nature. What I have checked is our compatibility and you have jumped over every hurdle and through every hoop I've put in front of you. Enthusiastically. I've found you to be sensitive and sensible. You're intelligent and you've exercised good judgement and self-control."
Elaine loved listening to his voice, even though she wasn't convinced of her self-control at all. "I don't know about that."
Gary chuckled. "Did I mention humble?"
Elaine's lips glistened as she ran her tongue over them, wetting her dry mouth. "No." She sent the blushing face.
"But seriously, it's true. I agree that the odds of us meeting, and finding each other, and being right for each other, are astronomical. But so far, that's what has happened. I also agree that the past two weeks have been crazy and we have done things pretty quickly. But I'd like to think our shared enthusiasm has brought us to the position we are in, and that I haven't rushed you into anything. If I'm not right about that, then I'd like to know."
"You haven't rushed me," Elaine typed.
"Good. We've done everything by the book. We are both driven to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's', you know."
"But what if I can't do it? What if I've misread who I am? What if I'm not submissive at all?"
"I'm smiling here."
"Why?" Elaine asked, the heat in her cheeks rising.
"You DO realise that being unsure of yourself is a delightfully submissive characteristic, don't you?"
"I thought submissives knew what they wanted."
"Not at the beginning. At the start most submissives have no idea what they want. All they know is, 'it feels right'. And 'it's so exciting'. Apart from that, not much is actually known. They have lots of ideas though."
"And on that basis they meet someone to dominate them?"
"Sadly, sometimes they do. They don't take the time to know themselves or to know the person they are willing to meet. They make mistakes in their haste."
"I don't want to make mistakes."
"Of course not. And that's what I'm saying."
"What are you saying?"
"I am saying that you haven't made a mistake about this. The lifestyle IS for you, and you are definitely submissive. And I don't want you to think that you are not a good submissive either. You want to learn and read and you are actively pursuing your self-improvement. You listen and you are conscious of yourself and of what you are doing. You are honest and giving. And you blush so beautifully. Did you know that most submissives blush? Did you know that most submissives are intelligent, thoughtful people? It's not shameful to be submissive at all. NOT finding the lifestyle would have been the real tragedy."
Elaine found herself nodding silently. She swallowed. "I might never have found the way to reach my full potential."
The smile in Gary's voice had returned. "That's my girl."
Elaine squeezed her thighs together as the words rang in her ears. That's my girl. Butterflies took over her stomach.
Gary sounded more relaxed as he continued to explain. "Look, everyone is different and the extent varies, but there are three major things most submissives seem to have in common. The first is a deep and abiding desire 'to be pleasing'. This is true in ninety-nine percent of submissives. The trait is not the exclusive domain of subs though. Lots of people desire the approval of others to validate who they are, so it's by no means a defining characteristic. But it's almost a prerequisite.
"The second thing most subs have in common is a physically pleasurable response to aspects of the lifestyle that appeal to them. If for example you like the idea of being tied up, as a submissive it doesn't just appeal to you on a curiosity level, but on a physical level. In other words, a potential submissive who is interested in bondage gets wet when she thinks about being restrained or helpless."
Elaine bit her lip and wondered if getting wet for no reason also qualified. She had to focus. Gary was talking again.
"And the third thing most subs have in common is a strong desire for any relationship to be simple, clear, consistent and structured. Submissives don't take any shit, and people who don't communicate well, don't impress them. Submissives who have discovered their nature are more careful with whom they share themselves. They know how vulnerable they are and they take steps to protect themselves, not just when they arrive in the lifestyle. Often it begins with family and friends. Sound familiar?"
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