Cybertherapy Ch. 04

She went back down to the kitchen and peered through the glass door of the oven. The cheese soufflé looked good -- just not as good as his. Cursing him again for what seemed like the ten thousandth time, she went to join her parents in the living room.

Seeing her parents had become difficult again now she'd finished with the surgery. Her mother was adamant she should be out 'socialising'. Of course what she meant was dating men. The onslaught recommenced almost immediately.

"Have you been out at all this week?"

"No Mum." She was resigned to hearing the usual lectures. "I know, you think it's time I had a social life, I should be making friends again. What you mean of course is a boyfriend."

"Not necessarily dear. Although that would be nice."

Cathy groaned. "Mum, I still have some pretty nasty scars. I have to cake my face with make up to hide the damage, and I'll never be able to wear sheer stockings again. No man is going to be interested in me. And if they do it'll be out of pity. I don't think I could bear that, knowing a man's only with me because he feels sorry for me."

Her mother looked at her with an odd expression. "Not all men would care about the scars."

"Oh right. I'm not likely to find one of them, am I?"

"Not if you treat them all the same way as you did the last one."

"Meaning?"

"You know full well what I mean. Ben Fielding cared about you. He saw past the scars. And when he was talking to you on the net he didn't know who you were but still cared."

Yes, Cathy thought, but her mother didn't know about what had happened, did she? She still found the memory of their cyber-sex embarrassing. "I've told you Mum, I don't want to talk about it. And I don't want to talk about him either."

"Why not?"

"He hurt me, OK?"

Gloria frowned. "How could he have hurt you if you didn't care about him?"

"I... Ididn't care about him." Cathy was irritated again now. They had had this discussion several times and she hated the way her mother made her face things she wanted to ignore.

"Cath. You're an intelligent woman and you know as well as I do, you could only be hurt by someone you cared about. You never say you're angry with him, just that he hurt you. How long are you going to deny what you really feel?"

"As long as it takes to make you leave the subject alone."

"It won't happen. I can safely say I know Ben far better than you ever did and I know he still cares about you. You're the first subject of conversation every time we see him."

"But he hasn't seen me for nearly two years." Cathy was a little surprised he could still be asking after her; he should have lost interest by now.

"He still cares dear. I think it's time you forgave him and let him explain what happened."

"You really think he cares about me?"

"Yes. And you did like him didn't you?"

Cathy hesitated. More than she was willing to admit. "A bit, I suppose," she conceded at last. "He was quite nice when I started to be friendly to him. And he cooked wonderful food."

"Come on Cath, admit what we all know, you liked him."

"Well maybe I did. But he took advantage."

"He didn't, you know. You need to talk to him."

"OK, OK. If only to stop you going on and on about it. You win, alright?" But when Gloria smiled, Cathy groaned again. "But you're not allowed to gloat."

Gloria was still smiling. "Well, I don't often win an argument against you, dear."

*

Unusually Gloria had made a special request for a cheese soufflé. She was coming alone, as Roger had had to go on an unexpected business trip. Ben had just shut the oven when the doorbell rang.

He opened the front door to find not Gloria but her daughter and the shock of finding Cathy on his doorstep, and not her mother, left him speechless. As always when faced with a pretty woman, even one he knew, he had no idea what to do. He stood staring until she finally spoke.

"Hello Ben. Can I come in or do I have to stay out here?" On her face was the loveliest smile he'd ever seen.

"I'm sorry." He stepped back and caught his foot on the mat, making him stumble.

"Thank you." She walked past him into the living room. "This is a nice room."

"Er... Thanks," he mumbled, closing the door and following her in.

She turned around, giving him another of those beautiful smiles. "I'm sorry to spring this on you. It was Mum's idea."

"I've no doubt it was." He thought for a moment. "Sorry, that sounded all wrong. What I meant was it doesn't surprise me. She's wanted us to talk for a long time."

Cathy sighed. "I know. And I know I should have listened to what you have to say a long time ago. I was embarrassed and hurt and I lashed out at you. I was wrong and I apologise."

"That's OK," Ben said, rather thrown off-balance by this new conciliatory Cathy.

She began to take off her coat looking pointedly at Ben, who finally realised he needed to take it from her. He stopped when she slipped it off her shoulders to reveal the pretty floral dress beneath. The neckline was low enough to allow a modest glimpse of her cleavage; he noticed she was actually very slim and for the first time he could actually see her legs beneath the swirling knee-length skirt. Once again he froze, intimidated by the evidence of her femininity.

"May I sit down?"

"Yes, sorry." Ben was aware he'd forgotten all his manners. He'd never had this problem with her when she was an invalid in her bed.

She gave him a rueful glance. "Ben, that's the third time you've apologised since I arrived."

"Sorry -- oh..." He looked sheepish. "I can't help it, it's a bit of a shock, seeing you here. I didn't think you'd ever want to talk to me again."

She nodded. "Nor did I for a long time."

"So what changed your mind?" Ben was a little puzzled.

"My mother."

"Oh yes, of course." Once more he was tongue tied, why did it have to be so hard to talk to a woman?

Cathy sniffed the air. "That smells good, what is it?"

"Cheese soufflé." They both burst out laughing. "Your mother insisted."

She smiled. "She knows I can't make one as good as yours."

Embarrassed by the compliment, Ben flapped towards the sofa. "I'm sorry. I'm not thinking," he gabbled. "Please have a seat. Can I get you a drink?"

"Stop apologising," she said, laughing as she sank down on the sofa. "And I'd love a glass of wine please."

He returned with their drinks and sat in an armchair facing her, amazed at the changes since he'd last seen her. To him, she seemed as beautiful now as she had been when the picture in the drawer was taken. As he sat staring at her he lost all sense of time; he had no idea how long it was before she finally broke the silence.

"Well?"

"Wow," he said, finally releasing the breath he'd been holding in. "You look incredible."

"Thank you, sir." She grinned. "They put me back together quite well, didn't they?"

"Better than that. You look beautiful." He seemed unable to form any sentences longer than a few words.

"Well, that's just flattery. Not that I'm complaining."

Ben excused himself and went to the kitchen to make an unnecessary check on the dinner, jumping several feet into the air at the sound of Cathy's voice behind him.

"Why are you so nervous, Ben? I promise for tonight at least I won't lose my temper. I can't promise for longer than that, after all I am a woman and we're allowed to be unreasonable if we want to." She chuckled.

"I'm sorry."

She groaned. "Will youplease stop apologising?"

Ben managed a laugh. "Oh God. I always seem to be so awkward with women. I don't know why. My confidence deserts me and my brain seems to stop working."

"It didn't when you were my home help."

"No, I can't explain that. Although, maybe because you needed my help it gave me confidence." Even as he spoke, the idea made sense to him.

"Well if you could talk to me then, you can talk to me now. Why don't you start with you? Tell me all about Ben Fielding."

Two hours later they were still talking.

Ben couldn't remember eating the meal; he'd been too busy watching her for most of the time. "I hope the food was OK."

"I'm sure it was. After the soufflé, I confess I was so caught up with talking to you I didn't really notice." She looked adorably bashful, he thought. "My turn to be sorry. I should have paid more attention after you'd taken the trouble to cook it."

"Don't worry, I was just as bad. I hadn't realised we had so much in common." He collected the plates and took them to the kitchen.

"Did you really like me? When I was being so horrid." She had to speak a little louder whilst he was out of the room.

"Yes, although I thought it was KillerBitch I was getting to like." He blushed at the memory, thankful she couldn't see him as he made the coffee. "I really am so sorry about all that. I'd never have taken advantage of you."

"What? Never?"

He went to the kitchen door and looked at her with surprised, only to see her smiling back at him. "You're teasing."

"Yes and no. Mum knows me better than I know myself. She said I didn't really hate you and she's right. I'm not sure how you did it but you got inside my defences."

"I think you are the most beautiful woman I've ever known." Ben couldn't imagine what possessed him to say such a thing. He was embarrassed as soon as the words left his mouth.

Cathy gave a snort of laughter. "That's downright ridiculous and we both know it."

"No. I mean it. It's you, the person you are. That's what's so beautiful." Ben was serious but Cathy didn't seem to believe him.

"Lot of old flannel," she joked. "Now hurry up with that coffee. I shan't makeyou wait this long next week."

*

Three weeks later Ben knew he was in love for the first time in his life but had no idea what to do about it. After dining out for once, on returning Cathy to her house he found himself accepting her offer of another coffee.

"Would you put the kettle on for me please Ben? I'll be back in a minute."

He did as she asked and sat on the sofa to wait. When she returned down the stairs, she was wearing a long white negligee. Whilst it was not transparent, it showed sufficient to hint at her body beneath. Ben was breathless. As soon as she sat next to him, all thought of coffee was gone.

"Right then, CareBear," she teased. "It's time to finish what you started."

He had no time to respond before her lips locked on to his. Though he'd hoped this would happen sooner or later, he still found he couldn't believe it was happening. Having found he enjoyed writing, he'd carried on creating stories--and Cathy had been the model for all his heroines. But though he tried to concentrate on all the things he'd fantasised about doing with her, her kisses made it very difficult to concentrate and when she took his hand and led him up to her bedroom, Ben thought he might have died and gone to heaven.

Having followed her down on to the bed, Ben held her tightly, trying to give himself time to think. She put her hand on the back of his head and pulled his face to her neck. Of course--her neck! She'd said she liked being touched there that night on the net. His hand began its caresses as he kissed her throat, his lips feeling the vibrations as she made soft humming noises. He nibbled down to her shoulders, kissing and sucking. Pausing for the briefest time, he recalled their chat and which part of her incredible body he should explore next. Gently pushing her back, he opened the negligee exposing her body. Her breasts were perfect. Full and rounded, larger than he could cover with his hand and topped with perfect dark pink nipples.

He traced a circular path round each one with his fingers, gradually working towards the nipple in a decreasing spiral. When he finally reached the hard little peaks he gently pinched and pulled at them. Her soft sighs told him he was doing the right thing. Eventually his mouth followed his fingers and he sucked first one then the other into his mouth sucking and lightly biting on them.

"Oh Ben," she said quietly.

"Mmmm?" he murmured, not about to release his delicious mouthful to start talking just yet.

"It's been a long time."

He smiled against her flesh. "Mmmm."

His hand had left her breast and was exploring the flat plateau of her stomach, stroking, enjoying the smooth silky skin. He wanted to touch all of her at once, to take her and possess her but he didn't want to do anything that might scare her.

"Don't you dare stop now," she said as his movements slowed, taking his hand and pulling it down between her legs, the silky fabric there already drenched.

"May I take these off?"

"For fuck's sake, Ben, stop being a bloody gentleman. I haven't done this in almost five years -- what I want right now is a hard cock."

He was astonished - but delighted - at her words. It wasn't at all what he'd been expecting.

"Rip them off me if you like. I don't care." Her voice sounded hoarse, her hands already clawing at the waistband of his trousers. She seemed almost frantic in her efforts to undo them. "Oh Christ, Ben, help me. Get your bloody clothes off -- now!"

Laughing, he rolled away from her long enough to undo his trousers and begin to slide them down his legs. Cathy grabbed his shirt and ripped it apart, a button striking the base of the bedside lamp with a ping. She took hold of his now painfully hard manhood and pulled him towards her.

"I need this in me. We can make love later. Right now, just fuck me."

Ben didn't need any further invitation and climbing between her legs, slid straight in.

"Yes!" The scream in his ear was almost painful. It helped to distract him for a moment, he wasn't sure how long he could hold back; the sensations created by her hot wet sheath around his phallus bringing him almost immediately to the brink of orgasm.

"I'm not going to last, Cathy," he panted.

"Then don't, babe -- finish for me."

She lifted her hips, pushing back at him as he thrust into her, finally releasing the pent up passion he felt. Afterwards, he fell to one side, trying to keep his weight from crushing her, breathing heavily. Shell-shocked, still reeling from the frantic pace at which she had brought him to this point, it was some time before he recovered sufficiently to speak. "I'm sorry, I couldn't--"

"Ben Fielding!" she interrupted, gazing at him with amusement. "If you apologise one more time, I'll make you wait at least ten more minutes before you can have me again."

He smiled, weary but elated. "What just happened here? One minute we were going to have a coffee and the next we're in your bed."

She smiled back, stroking the side of his face before running her fingers through his hair. "Tell me something, how long is it since you made love to a woman?"

"A little while." He wasn't about to admit the truth -- then she'd really think he was a wimp.

"Honestly. I'm not making fun of you."

"Four years or so," he admitted sheepishly.

"And why is that?"

"I just seem to have a problem talking to women, never mind anything more."

"But you didn't have a problem when you were talking to KillerBitch?"

"No. I was pretending to be someone else." Her touch on his face and hair was reassuring.

"I don't think so. I think that was you, but without the fear. When I talked to Mum about you she said you seemed intimidated by women. That's when I knew I'd have to take the lead. If I'd waited for you we'd never have got started."

"But I don't understand why you'd be interested in me. A beautiful woman like you could have any man she wanted."

"You're so sweet. A complete idiot of course, but so sweet. You know how badly I'm scarred, you've seen me stuck in bed, I've insulted and belittled you and still you stayed around. And while you found the real me on the Internet, maybe I found the real you. The Ben who's strong and kind, patient and understanding. In the last three weeks I've felt safe and cared for. Now we need to move forward. We've made a start, now you have to make love to me. We'll learn together how to please each other."

And pulling his face towards hers, she kissed him.

*

The sun was shining through the window when Cathy woke up. She was lying on her side, Ben's arms wrapped round her. The memory of their lovemaking brought a contented smile to her lips. He'd been a very apt pupil and by the early hours of the morning he'd proved he could make her scream with pleasure. Somehow, she didn't think he'd need many more lessons.

She heard his breathing change and felt him stir. "Hello stud," she said with a giggle.

"Hello yourself." He squeezed her gently. "You feel good."

"Mmm." She wiggled her buttocks into his groin. "You feel pretty good yourself."

"My God, you're insatiable," he said with a chuckle, allowing himself to enjoy how she felt in his arms for a few moments before deciding the time had come to be serious. "Cathy, what happens now?"

She looked back over her shoulder at him, grinning. "Well, if I'm lucky you'll ask me to marry you before I get pregnant and you decide it's your duty."

Ben stared. "Is that a proposal?" he said, keeping his tone light. "You'd really want to marry a man like me?"

"What's wrong with you?"

"A middle aged hospital porter, who, until last night, was hardly Don Juan."

She rolled over to face him. "Ben! Don't you ever run yourself down like that again. You do a caring job, you're a fantastic cook, you're strong and I promise you as long as you make love to me like you did last night I will never feel short-changed." Her fingers traced the line of his jaw, feeling the stubble. "Though you'd better shave before we make love again. I think this would be very scratchy on the insides of my thighs."

Ben smiled. "Well, if you're going to be my wife, there's a problem you should know about."

"And that'syour idea of a proposal? I think you'd better practice." She smiled. "What's the problem? Are you worried about money?"

"Sort of." He felt rather guilty.

"You don't need to. I have some money. I can get a job, and we'll have your house. Don't worry that you don't earn a huge salary. I don't care." But he still looked worried, she realised. "That's not it, is it?"

"No. There can't be any secrets between us."

"Oh hell, tell me the worst." Thoughts of debts, bankruptcy, first wives, alimony all rushed through her head.

"Your parents never said where they got the money for your surgery?"

"No." Cathy frowned at the question. "I'm sure they borrowed it but they won't tell. They say they've been sworn to secrecy although I can't understand why."

"Probably because the person who gave them the money didn't want you to feel indebted to him."

"Him? What do you...?" Her eyes widened. "You? But how? What...?"

Ben grinned. "You'll find out soon enough. We have more than enough money to do anything we want."

"How much exactly?"

"I don't know exactly. But when I won the lottery it was three million pounds."

"Oh hell," Cathy groaned. "Now I'll have to spend the rest of my life repaying you." And pushing his arms away, she lowered her face to his groin. "Time to get started then..."