Dark Impulse Ch. 18

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She could literally feel the blood drain from her face as she processed the information. Her hands began to shake, and she gripped them tightly together to make them stop.

"When did this happen? Today?"

"We're not sure about that yet, Ma'am. We're going to interview the janitors and guards on duty to establish a time frame, but we suspect that it may have occurred over the weekend. Ms. Green told us that she found the office in this condition when she arrived, and it appears to us that your books and papers have been lying around for longer than just a few hours."

Grace exhaled sharply at the policeman's words, aware that his cop's eyes were analyzing her reactions to see if she was somehow involved. She didn't give a damn; she let him watch her as she went to survey the damage. She stared in shock as she saw the destruction and overall lack of respect that permeated the area that was once her personal sanctuary from the madness of the city, the little corner of Academia that was all her own. Now it had been violated, and she knew who was behind it.

David, how could you?

She felt tears in her eyes, causing the terrible scene before her to shift and stretch. It was as if she was looking at the room through a giant kaleidoscope, or walking through a hall of mirrors; all was distorted and horrific. She cried silently as she observed the multitude of overturned desk drawers, books with their pages ripped out and scattered across the floor among lonely paper clips and shards of broken glass.

She stared forlornly at the carpet, searching for the pieces of her shattered dreams.

"Dr. Nakimura?"

She was startled by the deep baritone voice of the policeman, and she could no longer hold in her grief. The sobs escaped her throat despite the hand that she had raised to her mouth, and she felt a wave of deep sadness and rage swell inside her, so powerful that it threatened to tear her apart.

The cop looked uncomfortable with her emotional distress. He cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but maybe we should go to the station..."

Grace's head shot up. "No! I mean, please. I can't handle this right now. I promise that I'll come to the station and make a statement later today, but for now I need to leave. Please, I really need to be alone."

The police officer looked at her face for a long moment before he finally nodded.

She passed through the waiting area on her way out and ran into Evelyn. Her eyes were warm and concerned as she placed a hand on Grace's arm.

"Are you going to be okay, sweetie?"

Grace bit her lip as more tears threatened to fall.

"God, I hope so. I'll call you later."

She left the office and looked around the corridor for Gabriel. He was gone, and while she was relieved that she didn't have to face him in her current state, she couldn't suppress the feeling of disappointment that swept through her. She felt anger, too.

Hmm. For someone who claims he'll support me in times of trouble, he sure left quickly enough. I was only in there a few minutes. Damn it! I need someone to talk to, someone to hold me and listen. I guess he didn't want the job after all.

If it was possible, Gabriel's absence made her feel even worse than the condition of her office. She shuddered at the memory and began to walk away. She headed for the stairs, too lost in her thoughts to realize that she wasn't alone. She opened her purse and pulled out a handkerchief as she reached the ground floor and left the building, not caring where she went as long as it was away from the university.

She was certain that David had sent some of his hired goons to trash her office over the weekend after he left for London, and she knew why. They had destroyed everything in search of the evidence that she'd collected that fateful day over a week before, but Grace had enough sense not to keep it in such an obvious place.

Both the bloody shirt and the shot glass with David's fingerprints were hidden away in her safe-deposit box, along with enough money for her and Rafe to make a fresh start away from the city.

I think it's time for me to call Mosely. There. The decision has been made. I'm finally going to take back control of my life, and I will no longer live in fear. David, you bastard. You made the wrong move, and now you've really lost me and Rafe. For good.

Grace felt a small sense of peace at the thought, and she looked up at the street sign to see that she'd walked five blocks up Amsterdam Avenue to reach the 125th Street Subway. She descended into the depths and navigated past the ticket windows and through the turnstiles, her body on autopilot. Her thoughts centered around Gabriel, and how much she had wanted his presence beside her, his strength. But he was gone.

She needed to find a peaceful, quiet place where she could think things through, and she knew exactly where to go.Of course. It's closed to the public on Mondays, but I have security clearance. No one will bother me there. Wonderful.

As she waited for the north-bound A train to arrive, Grace suddenly became aware of someone intruding on her personal space. Her eyes remained fixed on the vacant tracks below the platform as she waited a moment to see if the person would move away. No luck.

Gritting her teeth, she turned to tell the intruder to back off when all the air whooshed out of her lungs. She saw that the stranger was none other than Gabriel, and she couldn't think of anything but the overwhelming relief that she felt upon seeing him.

He didn't leave me after all. He was there the entire time, just like I wanted.

Gabriel must have seen something revealing in her eyes, because he smiled at her. Before she realized what she was doing, she smiled back. The train arrived, interrupting the warm intimacy of the moment and forcibly reminding her of the last time she'd taken a train in connection with Gabriel. It was back at RLC, when she left him.

At the painful memory, her smile disappeared as if it had never been. He frowned in confusion at the change he sensed in her, but Grace was no longer looking at him.

Together, they boarded the crowded A train and squeezed their way around the cramped bodies until they found a deserted corner in which to stand. Grace held onto the metal pole and took a breath of the stale air, and when Gabriel came to stand with her, her nose was filled with the scent of sandalwood and man.

It took all of her willpower not to grab the lapels of his leather jacket and pull him to her, all her strength not to unbutton his white oxford shirt and press her face to his broad chest and inhale his scent. For all she was worth, she fought the temptation to lean against him and allow him to take over. She wanted him so badly.

She tried to ignore him by looking out of the window, but there was nothing interesting to see. She looked at the other passengers, who were off in their own worlds. She glanced at the bar that she clung to and noticed that Gabriel's own hand was very close to hers on the same piece of metal. Only an inch separated them.

Fascinated, she stared at their hands. Hers was light and delicate while his was slightly darker and rough, hers was small and could easily be swallowed up by his much larger one.

Grace looked up to see Gabriel watching her, his green eyes glistening under the florescent lights of the subway car. She knew that he was waiting for her to make the first move. She remembered her thought from earlier that morning.

Do I dare trust him?

She took a deep breath. Slowly, she slid her hand down to lightly cover his. At the touch of her skin against his, she heard him release a sigh before his fingers opened and laced with hers. She looked up at him again and saw that his eyes were closed, his expression blissful.

Her grip tightened as well as his, and she felt her eyes growing moist. She closed her eyes, unable to look at him again for fear that he'd see how much she still loved him. He looked away, afraid that he would scare her off with the words he wanted to say.

They stayed like that, silent yet connected, until they came to their stop.

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