Darla

There must have been something on my face because David spoke up.

"Sarah, you will have to count me out on this one."

Both Marylyn and Sarah turned their eyes on him and tried to object but he was firm in his insistence. Justin was quiet and his eyes darted to mine quickly and his glance returned just as quickly to Sarah, almost as if pleading. I made my decision.

"I'm sorry, guys, but I've really had a long day and probably too much to drink at this point. If I start with the shots, I'm going to be worthless."

I was trying to be diplomatic without throwing rain on the festivities. David looked at me and nodded his head as if he could read my mind. I rose somewhat unsteadily on my feet and then the alcohol hit me. I was more plastered than I thought. David rose up and caught my arm, laughing.

"Darla, you are going to end up flat on your face if you're not more careful."

I guess that broke the chill because everybody laughed and the tension disappeared.

"OK, party poopers, I'm saving it for when we get together at my place again and no excuses." Sarah exclaimed with a throaty laugh.

Justin looked just a bit disappointed but I left it. He wanted to play, just like I would have wanted to play a year ago or maybe even just a couple months ago. It might have been great sex but it sure would not have been love, not like this. The rest of the evening went well enough but I was tiring of it. There was still some tension in the air or rather some disappointment that I could sense with Justin and Sarah. Marylyn was fine with everything and we were chatting and drunkenly laughing at nearly every word.

At some point I asked Marylyn if David could run me home as I was not at all fit to drive and he was the only one reasonably sober. The rest of us were tanked and I really didn't want to spend the night here as I felt out of place. I felt like the third wheel and I needed to wrap my mind around that when I was sober.

David did run me home and even accompanied me into the house to make sure everything was OK. I assured him I was fine, gave him a hug and a cheek kiss.

"Darla, get some sleep and either Marylyn or I will call you tomorrow. I saw the look on your face earlier and understood."

He hugged me again and I watched him head out the drive and down the road.

The next morning, I woke at dawn again although my head was splitting. After chugging nearly a quart of juice, I suited up for a good run and headed down my country road. The events of the previous evening were playing out in my head and I kept coming back to the disappointment hidden in Justin's face. He wanted the sex and it seemed to me he was really interested in Sarah Stanhope. That was trouble enough in my mind but oddly it didn't bother me as much as it might a while ago. Last night when I saw them together, it bothered me. That morning, there was only an unsettled feeling that I no longer understood what I want.

When I rounded the last bend toward the house, I saw a car in the yard and didn't recognize it. As I approached, a tall man exited the vehicle and waved at me coming up the drive.

"Hello, Ma'am. I didn't mean to startle you if that's the case. I'm William Donaldson from Baylor University. I was in the area and somebody mentioned you did some craft work and artistry out here and when I looked you up, your contacts popped up with an application and CV."

"Oh yes, Dr. Donaldson, it's a pleasure to meet you. I see you are an early riser like me, it seems."

I had acted on a whim some three or four months earlier and submitted my CV and an application for an artist in residence program in Austin run by Baylor. I had not heard back from them and hadn't given it any real thought and now here stood one of the program directors.

"Mr. Donaldson, I hope you will forgive my appearance. If you would I'd like to clean up and change and then perhaps we can have some coffee and discuss your visit?"

He nodded and agreed so I showed him to my studio and excused myself to do just that. I returned about 15 minutes later with fresh coffee and some pastry I had left over from the previous day. He was peering intently at a couple pieces I had just recently glazed in the kiln a few days before.

"This is marvelous and the detail carries through the whole piece. Is this a commission piece or still available?"

This was a jade green 36" vase with a carved forest scene around the base and the lip. I made it with hopes of moving it to the gallery but if somebody wished to purchase it I was all ears.

"It's available if you like it or know somebody who might" I replied with a sellers smile.

"Oh I might. It's an intricate work and it brings me to my purpose for being out here so bright and early. You see, I had reviewed your CV and your work earlier but had been distracted for a couple of months with some personal business. However, as I said, your CV popped up on my PDA when I was looking up the referral to you.

I was hoping to get a look at your work and perhaps discuss your application if you are still interested."

Well that was a hell of a surprise and a big deal. A residency in Austin was big league and I had dreamed of that kind of break for years. My app was really made on just a hope and chance.

"Mr. Donaldson, I am very much interested and would love to talk further about it with you."

We sat down and discussed all the details and by the time we had finished a pot of coffee, I had an invitation to travel to Austin and Waco to do a meet and greet and see if there was a mutual fit. There would be a wonderful stipend, a salary actually, a loft apartment in the same building as the studio and a well-heeled consignment shop to move product. If successful I could very well look to an adjunct position at Baylor. To say I was excited was a gross understatement. Mr. Donaldson left with the Jade green vase and left me with a check for $1,200.

I think I jumped and danced for joy for an hour after he left. When I finally calmed down, I decided to take a good walk around the place. I would never sell it. It's a family place having belonged to my grandparents first. Kiera would get it at some point and if things turned out well, she might get it sooner than anticipated. The garden was in full swing now with vegetables all over the place. I used to keep chickens and some hens a few years ago but I got tired of the chicken shit. The house and buildings are all in good repair. It's a nice country place on 60 acres of land with privacy and convenience to town, the best of both worlds. The question now is whether I could really leave it. I've been here all my life.

The phone went off in my pocket.

"Hello and good morning, Mother."

"Why good morning to you too, my little precious girl."

"OK, what's up? You are too happy to be my mother."

I shared my good news with Kiera and told her I would be out of town for a few days the following week and asked if she could keep watch over the place while I was gone. Of course she agreed. Until then, I wanted her to come out and have a BBQ the following afternoon and bring Millicent with her if she was free. I had decided to ask David and Marylyn on the spur as well. We ended our call and before I could call the Stones, David called me.

"Good morning, Darla, I hope your head is still on straight this morning. I know Marylyn's is wound up tight."

"Hey, David. Good to hear from you. I'm fine. I did my morning run and that cleared it all up."

"Great. Listen, if you are interested I'd love to bring some lunch by and maybe have a chat for a while. I need to apologize and explain some things to you."

"David, you do not need to apologize for anything. I'm a grown woman however, lunch would be great."

We chatted briefly after that and concluded with him bringing deli sandwiches and drinks. By the time he had arrived, I had freshened up and set a table on my patio next to the garden. David was only a few short years older than me but if I didn't know I would have pegged him to be a few years younger. He was around 6 feet tall and maybe weighed in the 180 range with dark brown hair and bright blue eyes. In a word he was attractive. He struck me as the type of man that most women were universally attracted to. I know I certainly was and it wasn't the thoughts of getting my bones jumped by him. It was the whole package.

David had brought a wonderful spread of sandwiches, fruits and cider for our lunch and we enjoyed it in the mid-day sun while chatting about running, fitness and even my vegetable gardening. I didn't bring up the exciting news from that morning. After I cleared away the dishes and things from the table, David moved on to the events from the previous evening.

"Darla, I know you told me not to apologize for last evening but I insist." He held up his hand to stop my protestations.

"I know, we're all adults and consensual ones at that but I still need to tell you I am so sorry for how that scene was being played out last evening. I should have gone with my initial instincts and nixed it from the beginning. I was foolish and for that I apologize.

Now, I am compelled to explain a few things for you so you don't think me to be some sort of rogue or careless with my intimacies. As I told you a month ago following that awful incident, I was playing matchmaker of sorts in having Justin invite you to the party that Sarah was having that weekend. Marylyn had introduced me to him as Kiera's dad and when I mentioned it to Kiera one evening, she started talking about the both of you and before I knew it, we were both scheming to somehow get the two of you back together or at least enjoying each other's company socially. As it turned out, we didn't do anything initially. You set that ball in motion all on your own. Now, to be honest, I did suggest to Justin that he take you to Sarah's party instead of out to dinner the night before. I stand guilty of that before you."

I interrupted him briefly. "David, it is an appreciated guilt, really. I was looking forward to it initially although I have to be honest. After last night, I'm having second thoughts."

"About that, I guess that's what I really need to apologize for and try to explain."

I nodded and he continued.

"You see, Marylyn and I have a special relationship with Sarah. I've worked for her father for many years now and have known her since I was a youngster in high school. I don't know how much Kiera has told you about me but Marylyn and I went through a few rough spots where I came this close to leaving her. Without going into all the details, Marylyn was involved with resolving the problems and became very close to both of us. Now, there is a lot more to the story and someday if you are inclined, I'll share some of that but suffice to say, the three of us, are, well, I guess I'll be frank. The three of us have a shared intimate life. You know what I mean?

I guess I half smiled and nodded.

"Good. And that brings me to last night, I guess. As I said, Marylyn had introduced me to Justin whom, she had met while staying at Sarah's home one weekend. He had been keeping company with the woman we saw him with during our lunch at the Bistro, if you remember. Her name is Janet and she is a long-time friend of Sarah's along with her husband Donald. As I mentioned then, they both enjoy a rather open relationship in their marriage and at the time, Justin was filling one of Janet's desires.

I guess this is where Sarah comes in. You see, Sarah has a fairly dominant personality. She likes being in charge and directing the action. She is also and I struggle sometimes to describe it, she is a passionate voyeur. So, when you put that dominant desire mixed in with her love of voyeurism, you get, well, you get Sarah."

I wanted to stop him at that point because I knew what I saw in Justin. It was lust and desire on his part and it wasn't for me. He wanted that woman. I knew this because I've felt the same many times in the past. I've desired another man's fat cock and chose that over the satisfaction I already had in the man I loved. Justin desired what I was trying to leave behind.

"David, would Sarah have fucked Justin last night or maybe, better yet, did she fuck him?" He looked at me for several moments before replying.

"Darla, if she did, it was while I brought you home but probably not. Now I might be wrong. Justin is a good looking man and Sarah has a rapacious appetite but her interests last night probably would have been more inclined to see if she could have exerted the kind of persuasion she has with Marylyn on you. Justin might want to fuck Sarah but he doesn't really know her and what turns her on.

That said, I already knew you were not going to fit her bill, so to speak. You aren't the submissive type and when I saw the look on your face, it plainly told me to put a halt to what she was trying to do. So I did and as we know, I brought you home. Justin spent the night in our guest room."

"So, she could have fucked him and you wouldn't have known about it. Look at me! I don't know why I'm asking these questions."

"Darla, I know she didn't spend the night in the guest room or visit it during the night. She spent the night in bed with Marylyn and me."

He grinned when he said it and I was jealous. So they have a ménage à trois.

"OK, I need a glass of wine. Want one?"

I returned with the bottle and glasses and over the next couple of hours we talked about relationships, marriage, his relationship with Sarah and my years both as a wife and the ten years since my divorce. I even got brave and talked about my unfaithfulness and the attempts to bring Justin into that lifestyle. While I was sitting there talking and drinking I knew I was becoming aroused by the man but something new in me pushed that back. I really liked this man but I knew I needed one man I could call my own. We finished the bottle and our discussion and David hugged and kissed me briefly on the lips. After I watched him drive down the drive and turn onto the road, I knew I had made a decision.

Other than dinner at David's the previous evening, I really hadn't been anywhere since the incident, as I referred to it. Kiera had done a real number on both men. The man who attacked her had a cracked skull and was being charged with several offenses, namely assault. Jason had skull fractures and a loss of hearing in one ear. He was being charged with aggravated assault and rape. He was also dismissed from employment with Phoenix Financials Group. While both men were free on bail with heavy restrictions, somebody paid a visit while they were still in in the hospital or jail and put the fear of God in both of them. Neither has been seen since they were let out.

Later that evening, I ducked out of the house and found myself back at The Pub nursing a vodka tonic and eating salt peanuts. It was busy again but I didn't go to hook up. In fact this was really more of a self-test than anything else. I knew if I wanted, I could easily get laid and probably have a great time. The difference was, that no longer appealed to me as having a great time. The more I thought on it, the more I decided that Austin would be a good thing. Nobody knew me there and if I was writing a new chapter, this would be the best thing to happen. Before I could pull myself out of the place, fate intervened.

"Darla, how in the world are you?"

I looked up into his face. He still had that wavy shock of red hair, more toward auburn actually, and deep brown eyes to compliment a fresh white smile.

"Daniel, I'm doing great. I didn't see you in here or I might have said hello."

Daniel was one of my more serious affairs from a couple years ago. We had a torrid affair lasting for about six months before I broke it off because of his wife. Well, he was still married at the time but she had separated and returned to live with her parents somewhere upstate. I say torrid because we were compatible in every way. I never so much as looked at another man when I was with him. His wife came back into town and learned that we were seeing each other and she approached me one evening, right here in the Pub. She wanted her husband back and me out of the picture and wanted to know what it would take. Well, that was odd. I'd never been asked that before, especially by a man's wife. Other than trying to beat the snot out of me which she couldn't have done if she tried, I don't know what she could of offered that would have won me to her side. It would not have mattered. I told her I was gone. The truth be told, I ended the affair because I found myself falling in love with Daniel and I still loved Justin. So it ended and I went on a binge of men for a couple of months trying to forget him.

"Darla, I know we are passing each other in the dark of night like this. Jesus, that's such an old cliché but true. Look, I'd like to get together for a drink sometime soon or dinner or something and no, I'm no longer married. It didn't work out."

I didn't say anything at first.

"Anyway, here , take my card. If you are game, give me a buzz. I'd like to just catch up if nothing else."

"Daniel, that would be fine. Here, take my card too. The number is still the same. I've got to go out of town for a while but I'm game when I get back. Let's touch base then, OK.

We hugged each other and I slipped out the door for home. Oddly, I felt a light spring in my step and the feeling that for the first time in years, things were really going my way.

Kiera and Millicent came by for a BBQ the next day as did David and Marylyn. Justin turned down the invitation when I called him due to a prior engagement he had already made. Secretly I felt somewhat relieved by that. We all had a good time and I shared the good news of my upcoming visit to Austin. Surprisingly, everybody already knew about it but I went into all the details regardless.

Perhaps it was the light spirit I was in and the cheerfulness of my opportunity but Kiera seemed to pick up on it.

"You and dad aren't getting back are you?" She didn't ask that with any sadness but more of just a general nature kind of inquiry as if she already knew.

"Baby, I'm going to go to Austin and see where I want to be in life. I've wasted the last ten years of my life and I don't want to waste another minute of it. If your dad and I get back together it will be because both of us want it. At this point I don't really believe he does and while that might have ruined my day a month or two ago, baby, today it makes what I'm going to do that much easier."

"But you don't know if he feels that way, Mother."

"Kiera, you are a smart woman. Look at me. Look really hard at me. Now tell me. Do I look disappointed?"

"Fuck! You are moving on, aren't you? I don't believe it, after all this time." Kiera had tears in her eyes but a smile of joy on her face. She knew my decision had been made. We hugged each other and I kissed her forehead and told her how much I loved her. We then returned to the patio and my guests.

I was packed, out the door and on a plane for Austin by 9 AM Tuesday morning. When I arrived at Baylor's north Austin campus, I seemed out of place. This was more of a business and education kind of feel but I eventually found Dr. Donaldson's office after looking for nearly twenty minutes. He made quick introductions and ushered me into a waiting conference room. I think the process was to try to make me sweat and it was working. When he returned with six other people, they started the grilling process. In all fairness, Donaldson had given me a heads up about the board interviews so I wasn't surprised. Actually, once I got past the sweat stage, it was a breeze. We were done in thirty minutes and after waiting with coffee and Danish, he came back in and told me we were heading downtown to the studio. I was in.