Dawn Redeemed

Fallon threw her feet off the back of the couch and sat up, watching the world swirl around dizzily for a minute. "Nothing." She tucked her knees up under her chin and stared at the cover of the book on her aunt's lap. The man on the cover was muscular and strong, dark and mysterious, just like her dad. "What would you do if you had a secret?"

Leigh marked her place and closed the book. "That depends. What kind of a secret?"

"A really, really big one. One you weren't supposed to tell anybody."

"Whoever told you this big secret must trust you an awful lot." Leigh studied Fallon's reaction curiously. Fallon bobbed her head sharply, her curls danced around her shoulders. "Are you worried about what's going to happen if you don't tell? And you're also worried about what's going to happen if you do tell, aren't you?"

Fallon blinked and nodded again. "Nobody would believe me if I did tell anyway."

"You might be surprised about what people would believe," Leigh said softly. "Do you trust the person who told you the secret?"

Fallon thought about that for a minute and shook her head. "I guess so. Yeah."

"Well then, you have your answer. Some secrets weigh so heavily on your shoulders that you feel like you are going to bust if you don't tell somebody. But, just because you know a secret. Doesn't mean its your secret to share. No matter how hard it is. Secrets are best kept behind zipped lips."

"Oh." Fallon clamped her mouth closed, practicing zipping her lip. She sat on the edge of the couch, thinking about her aunt's advice. Telling the secret would hurt everybody she knew and loved. No matter how difficult it was for her to keep quiet. She would. She had to trust her dad to decide when the time was right to tell her mom. She knew deep down, her mom loved her and it didn't matter if she'd grow up to have four paws to two hands and two feet. Her mom would love her anyway.

Finally, after what seemed an eternity in little girl time, Fallon heard the noisy clatter of her mom's car and the crunch of rock under tires as the car wheezed up the drive. The whole world went all dizzy as she flipped her legs over the back of the couch and sat up. "Mom's home!"

Erica climbed the porch steps and opened the screen door. Fallon was on her like a tick on an old hound dog the minute she stepped inside. Gently, she pried Fallon's arms from around her waist. "I missed you too."

"You were gone all day," Fallon scolded. "We were supposed to go shopping," Fallon said with a pout.

"And we will, as soon as I get changed. These shoes are killing my feet." Erica wiggled past Fallon and gave her aunt a wave. She gave the couch a longing sigh and walked down the hall to her room. "Go put on your shoes and socks, Fallon. We have to do our part to keep the Super Center in business."

Fallon trotted merrily past her mother. "Ok."

Saturday afternoon at the Super Center was like taking a brief glimpse into hell.

Shoppers wandered along the aisles at an unbelievably slow, zombie like pace.

Kids screamed in agitated tantrums, over stimulated by the noise and chaos in the store. Carts banged, clanged, and clattered along the endless stream of foot traffic. Erica looked down at her own cart, brimming with things that she didn't really need, but couldn't bring herself to do without. Her checking account was terrifyingly low and she should put back most of the items in her cart. She had enough to cover her purchases. Barely.

Rationalization was the mother of all bad decisions. She'd be getting a paycheck at the end of next week anyway. Spend the money now. Spend the money then. Numbers were numbers and it didn't make much difference anyway. The shopping cart had one wobbly wheel and Erica had to fight to keep it rolling in a straight line as she prowled along the checkouts, scouting for the shortest wait.

Fallon had one hand on the cart. Her fingers woven through the metal bars in the side. There were so many people. She thought shopping was fun. People watching was something she genuinely enjoyed. Being a kid meant people didn't pay much attention to her and some of the things they said and did when they thought nobody was paying attention were just too funny. Given the expression on her mother's face as she forced the cart to turn and took her place at the end of a long line to check out. Her mother didn't share her enthusiasm.

She scrambled to the front of the cart and climbed onto the bottom rack to get a better look at the crowd. A grin spread across her face as she saw her dad pushing a cart as he waded through the masses. "Look! There's Dad!"

Erica glanced up from her borrowed gossip rag and stood on her tip toes weaving and bobbing as she scanned through the crowd. Embarrassed, she hurried to bury the box of tampons in her cart beneath a bag of chips and a new short outfit she'd bought for Fallon. The crowd parted like the Red Sea for him as he pushed his cart toward them.

"Hi," Erica said doggedly. She tried to look anywhere but in his cart. Snooping was so beneath her. But, there were a lot of secrets about a person that could be revealed by the contents of their shopping cart. He had the usual, a gallon of milk, eggs, bread, some produce, a few packages of meat, a very nice bottle of wine, and a few tidbits from the hardware section. Nothing condemning or damning in any way. Too bad.

Torr gave Erica his best smile and slid around the cart, squeezed in between her and the impulse aisle. "Fancy meeting you two here." he chucked Fallon under the chin with his index finger and gave Erica a casual hug around the shoulders.

Erica inched back till her butt touched the candy bar display. She was wearing a battered pair of cutoffs, a t-shirt that was definitely older than Fallon, and a pair of flip flops that showed her chipped toenail polish. Definitely not what she'd like to be spotted wearing around Torr. Nervously, she smoothed the loose tendrils of hair that had fallen out of her ponytail away from her face. "I think the whole damn town is here today."

Torr snickered and nodded. "I think you're right." The line inched forward and he dragged his cart along with it. Erica's cheeks were reddened with a heated blush. Her reaction to him stirred the predator within him. He made her nervous. He made her excited. She was the most enticing prey he'd ever encountered. Erica's cart had reached the end of the conveyor belt. The male in him couldn't help checking out the frayed ends of her shorts as she fished out the contents of her cart and laid them on the belt.

That she could feel Torr's eyes roaming over her disheveled appearance made her blush even deeper. Quickly, she helped Fallon pile their purchases onto the conveyor belt and avoided conversation by pretending to dig in the bottom of her purse for her ATM card.

The checker was a model employee. Speedily, efficiently, and dispassionately, she scanned and bagged Erica's purchases and recited the total with a nasally Midwestern twang. Erica scanned the card and punched in her code. Luckily, she was going to have enough to see her through till next payday. Just enough, but it was all she needed. She helped Fallon load the heavier bags and scooted out of Torr's way.

She would have made tracks while Torr was checking out. Escaping the pounding of her heart and the wobbly feeling in her knees that being near him always inflicted upon her. If was if her body responded to him on some deep elemental level that her brain couldn't understand. Politeness dictated that she wait patiently while he paid and loaded his cart.

Torr was pleased when Erica stuck around instead of running off. He pushed his cart beside hers and stopped outside of the automatic doors. "I've bought enough food for a few people and I really don't like to fire up the grill for just one chicken breast. Would you two like to come over for dinner tonight?"

"Yes!" Fallon blurted out eagerly. She'd never seen her dad's house before and was curious.

Erica rolled her eyes at her daughter's eager answer. She could hardly back out now that Fallon had accepted the invitation. She reminded herself that she was supposed to be encouraging a relationship between Fallon and her father. "Sure," she answered in defeat.

Torr grinned in triumph. "Great, I'll get these loaded into the truck and go warm up the grill." The carts rattled and clanged in a metallic chatter over the rough surface of the parking lot. "Do you need help with your bags?"

Erica cast a warning glare at Torr. An accepted dinner invitation was no need for him to go all chivalrous on her and load the handful of plastic bags into her trunk. "I think we've got it."

Torr held up his hands in gesture of a surrender. "Just trying to be polite." He stopped his cart at the truck and gave them a wave before they melted into the sea of vehicles and sun baked blacktop.

Erica finally found her car sandwiched between two trucks with enough horsepower to tow a small country. Luckily, she hadn't bought any items that needed refrigeration. She hit the key fob and the trunk popped open. "Fallon, you should have let me answer Torr's question." She wasn't angry at her daughter and understood the little girl's naturally inquisitive nature. But, some warning would have been nice.

"Why? We didn't have any plans for tonight," Fallon answered.

"No, I guess we didn't." Erica closed the trunk lid and slid behind the wheel. Self-consciously, she stared at her pale, freckled legs and the faded frayed edge of her shorts. At least, Torr had seen her dressed down and couldn't say he didn't know what he was getting into. As her looks went, they didn't get much worse than this. She flipped down the visor and pulled her hair free from its ponytail, finger combing it into submission. There wasn't anything else she could do to look a little more presentable.

Her purse, resting open on Fallon's lap, was a mother's purse and full of useful things, but an emergency make over kit wasn't one of them. She settled for a dab of perfume and a touch of lip gloss. She wiped her sweaty palms on her shorts and started the car, exhaling a nervous, jittery sigh as she backed out.

Fallon dutifully zipped up the purse after her mom dropped the lip gloss down into its depths. "Don't you want to eat supper with dad?"

"Its not that. I just wish I wasn't such a mess. You have the gift, just like Alex, you always look perfect. I look like an unmade bed."

Fallon giggled, "I don't think so. And I don't think dad does either. We both think you are absolutely perfect."

"Thanks, don't be jumping the gun about your dad and I. We still care for each other, but neither one of us are ready to rush into anything permanent. We're friends and we like one another, but that's all. I don't know where things are going between us. I don't want you to get your hopes up too soon."

"Oh." Fallon waved her hand nonchalantly. "I know all about relationships. I used to watch soaps with grandma before she...," Fallon bit her lip and diverted her eyes from her mom. Whenever she talked about grandma her mom always got this sad, far away look on her face and totally shut down. She missed grandma too. Fallon traced designs on the hot glass of the passenger side window with her fingertip. She realized, for the first time, what her dad meant when he called the wolf a blessing and a curse. Her mom would die someday, and she would be left alone, to miss her the way her mom missed grandma.

Erica steered through the traffic in the turn lane. "Its ok to talk about Grandma." Erica shook her head and slowed to make a turn onto a side road. "She used to make me watch those horrible things too."

Fallon giggled and nodded, "Everyday." Fallon rolled her eyes expressively. "I think soaps are so lame."

Erica snickered and pulled into the driveway behind Torr's truck. "Me too."

Chapter 62

Torr had exchanged his jeans and button down for something more casual. The kaki shorts made his knees look even knobbier than they already were. His feet made thwack-thwack sounds in the flip flops as he trotted across the living room to answer the door. "Hi guys, c'mon in."

Erica's eyes scanned down his masculine frame. She couldn't help it when such a fine male specimen was holding the door open for her. His thighs and calves were covered by a thin layer of coarse dark hair that deceptively hid the tight and toned muscles underneath. The t-shirt clung to his well proportioned chest and the sleeves stopped short enough to show the bulge of muscle on his arms. His dark hair curled around his ears and the nape of his neck, giving him a casual disheveled appearance. She blushed when he caught her checking him out.

The house looked homier than it had the last time she'd been there. He must have finally gotten around to unpacking. Knickknacks and pictures were scattered about on the coffee table and shelves. He'd taken the time to decorate. Soft fluffy pillows were strewn about on the couch in a haphazard arrangement. A throw rested across the back of a wooden rocker. The plush rug under her feet added a splash of color to the muted neutral tones of the living room.

"Do you like it?" Torr asked proudly.

"Yeah, it looks like someone lives here."

Fallon was busily scouting out the place when she noticed a game system tucked away on a shelf beside the T.V. "Oh! You've got a game system. Can I play it?"

"It'll be a while before dinner is ready. If your mom doesn't mind, I don't."

Erica thought about it. All Fallon's friends had game systems, but she'd stood her ground and refused to buy one for her daughter. The game Fallon had in her hand didn't look violent and it might have some educational potential. "Sure."

Torr taught Fallon the ropes of the game and ushered Erica down the hall. "I got the bathroom finished and this room is done as well." He turned the knob and showed Erica the room he'd picked out for Fallon. The room was small and lacked personality, but it had the basics, a bed and a nightstand. As Fallon grew up, she could add her own personal touches to the space. "Erica, I don't want you to think I'm pushing. This room is for Fallon. Whenever you both are ready, I'd like to start having her visit overnight."

"You want visitation rights?" Erica bristled. She knew it was too good to be true. She didn't attract princes, only toads.

"Erica, it's not like that. Yes, I want to spend as much time as possible with my daughter and with you. But, I told you I wouldn't push and I won't on either account." Torr smoothed a piece of Erica's hair away from her face and ran his fingers down her cheek. "I've made my intentions clear. And I can wait." He inched his mouth lower till their lips almost touched. "Eventually, I'll win you over."

Erica sucked in a deep breath, inhaling the male scent that hung in the miniscule space between their lips. "How can you be so sure?"

Torr closed the space between them and joined their lips. He kissed her slowly, his tongue made languid passes at the gap between her parted lips until she opened up and let him slip inside. Her arms respectively reached up around his neck, elongating her body in a gentle press against his. Soft skin brushed the back of his neck as she ran her fingertips through the ends of his hair. He sped the kiss, thrusting his tongue in and out of her mouth with eager swipes. His hands trailed down the arch of her back and spanned the narrow curve of her waist. She matched his pace stroke for stroke. Nails dug into his scalp. The sharp sting of her nails on his skin excited him. Her breath panted into his mouth and he inhaled every gasp as deep as he could, trapping her inside of him. Abruptly, he broke his hold on her lips and hovered just above them. "That's how I know."

"Cocky bastard." Erica gripped the door frame for support. She pushed off the oak frame and followed Torr into the living room. Obediently, she took the head of lettuce from his hands and began washing leaves for salad.

"You like me," Torr said as he peeled the chicken out of the grocery store container and dipped it into a bowl filled spicy-sweet marinade.

Erica looked at the sly grin on Torr's face and shook her head, "Sometimes, I don't know why." She flicked cold water at him off the end of her fingertips.

"Oh, I don't either. I'm just content that you do," Torr said with a devilish grin on his face. Part of a wolf's survival hinged on the ability to take advantage of a situation when it presented itself. Every kiss, every brush of his skin against hers, softened her and weakened her resolve. Erica's hands were full of dripping lettuce leaves. With her hands occupied, he stole a quick peck from her lips on his way to the grill.

Erica finished tearing the lettuce leaves and chopped a tomato and sprinkled some shredded carrots and cheese over the salad. The smell of grilling meat wafting through the open kitchen window was heavenly and her stomach growled with eager intent. She put the bowl in the center of the table. The salad looked pretty enough with the green leaves and splash of orange, red, and yellow.

Not knowing exactly what to do with herself, she idly rearranged the plates, glasses, and silverware on the table. She could go out and talk to Torr while he grilled. Right now, she was so confused about how she felt about him and the way he affected her. Whenever he was around all sense of self-preservation that she had went out the window. Just watching him hovering over the grill, performing such a mundane action, made her knees weak and her heart race. She blushed as hot as the gas flame, when he turned to look over his shoulder and smiled back at her. Embarrassed at getting caught in the act of checking him out, she retreated to the living room, plopping on the couch next to Fallon.

Fallon was engrossed in a video game. Erica picked up an extra controller off the coffee table and studied the knobs and buttons. Back in the day, when she was a kid, the controllers weren't nearly so complicated. Up, down, left, right, and fire were the only buttons on them. This thing had so many buttons and knobs crammed into a palm-sized space that it looked like it could launch a fleet of missiles.

"Wanna play?" Fallon asked, her attention still focused on the game. Fairies fluttered across the TV screen in a joyous dance as she mastered another level.

"No. that's ok. You go ahead," Erica answered. Fallon didn't get a chance to play video games very often. The technology changed so rapidly that Erica couldn't see parting with two or three hundred dollars when another latest and greatest game system came out every week.

Erica knew she didn't have the right to keep Torr away from his daughter and she didn't want to. Torr adored Fallon. She could see it in his eyes. Fallon was a good kid, but if Erica wasn't careful, Torr would spoil their daughter rotten. Fallon didn't need every toy that she thought she wanted. Fallon did very well, for a little girl, when it came to asking for things, but she only had a ten year-old's restraint when it came to wanting. If Torr offered, Fallon would accept. Torr didn't need to buy Fallon her every heart's desire. He was virtually a new dad and wouldn't know when to say no.

She could see that there were going to have to be some very strict ground rules laid out, soon. Right now, Erica wasn't ready to let Fallon come over alone. Spending the night would take even longer. It wasn't that she didn't trust Torr to take care of their daughter or Fallon to behave herself. Erica had had Fallon all to herself for a long time and she wasn't completely ready to share her, just yet.

"Fallon, do you like Torr?" Erica asked. Something else she had no right to do was to make decisions for Fallon without considering her thoughts and feelings. She'd have to listen to Fallon and use her input as a guide as for when the time was right to move to the next step.