Dawn's Innocence

"He didn't. If you'll sit down and let me explain. I'll tell you everything."

Erica plopped down on the lip of the tub. Inside, she was trembling. But, she supposed it was her friendship with her cousin that she valued more than her fear. If Alex had turned to the dark side there had to be a damn good reason for it. Maybe, she had been dying or something and it was the only way to save her life. Maybe, she'd been attacked and hadn't had a choice but to become one of the fanged. "I'm listening."

Alex took a deep breath and started where all good stories start, at the beginning. By the time she finished her story. They were both clutching onto one another and crying on each other's shoulders. "I can't imagine what you went through. To find Lucien and to lose him, again. You're so lucky to have Chance in your life. Love is so rare these days. Men suck and not in a toothy vampire kind of way either," Erica said.

Erica blew her nose on a wad of toilet paper and tossed it into the overflowing trash. She was amazed, after Alex explained things, exactly how ok she was with Alex's vampire lifestyle. Bitch. Alex would never gain weight. And she'd look exactly the same for decades, maybe longer. Vampires aged, at least that was some small consolation, slowly, a minute for every year? No one had exactly figured out the age to year ratio, yet. Erica would be a pile of dust before Alex got her first gray hair.

There were some perks to being human though. Alex couldn't eat. She couldn't drink anything but animal blood and the occasional human supplement. Sunlight blinded her. And wasn't the crispy critter myth a huge relief? Having a limitless lifespan meant complications. Eventually, Alex would have to disappear and give up all her mortal friends that weren't in on her secret. Eventually, all her mortal friends and her parents would die. The world would go on, but she would remain frozen, exactly as she was. As much as Erica envied Alex, she also pitied her. To never change in world that changed so quickly hardly seemed to be worth the price of immortality.

"Man problems?" Alex asked in a desperate attempt to shift the attention off of her or rather...her fangs. All things considered Erica took the news pretty well. Alex had smelled the pungent scent of envy for all of five seconds before her cousin thought the whole thing through and drew her own conclusions. Yeah, the whole immortal thing definitely had its drawbacks. They could be chatting it up like they had back in the day, but Alex sensed Erica had something more on her mind than makeup and the latest Dr. Phil episode.

Erica shrugged and took a deep breath. Nodding to Fallon's room across the hall, she confessed what weighed so heavily on her mind. "Fallon's father called a few days ago. I don't know how he found me, maybe a private investigator? Who knows? But he called, asking to meet me over coffee. He even offered to fly out to DC for a cup of Seattle's Best. Fallon answered the phone when he called. He didn't ask, but I think he suspects that she is his."

"Isn't that a good thing? So many guys shirk their responsibilities as a father. Whoever he is, he seems like a good guy."

"I feel guilty. I should have told him about her a long time ago. But, it was just a one-night stand, Alex. And don't judge. I... never tried to find him after I found out I was pregnant and I certainly never expected to hear from him again."

"Are you going to give him a call once you get settled?"

"I don't know. I should. He has a right to see his daughter. But, I'm not exactly in the best of situations right now. What if he's some big business tycoon and he tries to take her away from me? I can't afford a lawyer or a messy long distance custody battle right now."

"Do you know Fallon's father's name?"

"Alex, I was young and impulsive back in the day. But, I wasn't that much of a slut. Ok, maybe a little slutty, I'll grant you that. I didn't hop from bed to bed. He was...well he was so damn handsome. I let my hormones overrule my better judgment. No, I don't know his last name, but his name was Torr. Why?"

"Torr? And you met him in Texas?"

"What are you getting at Alex? Do you know him?"

"He lives in town."

"Here?"

"Do you want to see him?"

Erica bit her lip. Was she ready for a reunion with her long lost fling? Was she ready to introduce her daughter to her father? "I don't know. I need to think this over."

Alex grabbed Erica's hands. "I don't know him well. But, from what I know of him he's a good man and that he's suffered a great deal over the years. More than you could ever imagine."

"Don't tell me," Erica scowled. "He's a vampire like you."

"No, he's not a vampire."

Erica frowned at the seriousness of Alex's expression. She wanted, so desperately wanted Alex to say he was human. But she hadn't. "What is he? A fey? A goblin? A freakin' ghost? The damn tooth fairy? Is my daughter in danger? You have to tell me."

Alex shook her head. "I think he should answer that question for himself."

"I'm not even sure if I want to see him again."

"Erica, I don't think it's a matter of wanting to or not. You have to." She didn't know much about the pack, but their condition wasn't consequence of a bite or a blood exchange. Wolves passed the gene down from generation to generation. And little Fallon could have inherited the gene. She might not be as human as her mother thought she was. And she'd need her father, desperately in the years to come.

"I don't like the sound of that," Erica said hesitantly.

"Erica, I'm sorry. I wish there was more I could say. Please, call him. Soon. Just hear him out. Give Torr a chance."

"I'll think about it." She was information overdrive. Her cousin was a vampire. Her cousin was married to a vampire. And now her daughter, even though Alex hadn't come right out and said it, might have something hidden inside of her too. Something she'd inherited from her father that Erica didn't want to think about. She sat on the edge of the tub for a long time after Alex and Chance left. And she would have sat there all night if Alexander hadn't shooed her out with a hard grunt and a ruffle of the magazine tucked under his arm as a hint to scram and let a man do his business.

With nothing better to do she gave up and went to bed. The nights were still chilly and she sank under the covers searching out a warm spot in the bed. Sleep was a long time coming. Erica rolled over and tried to find a comfortable spot in the sagging mattress.

She bedded down in Alex's old room. The pepto pink walls were an ashy shade of gray in the dim light seeping through the curtains. Torr was an enigma she wasn't certain she wanted to solve. He'd sounded genuine over the phone. In person, from what she remembered, he was charming and damn was there an aura about him. He made a woman want to drop her pants and lose her inhibitions. But, that was ten years ago. She supposed it was too much to ask that he was balding and pot bellied. Of course, he wouldn't be. He'd be every bit as handsome and breathtaking as he'd been back then. And that worried her more than confessing to him the truth about his daughter.

Chapter 57

Kacie groaned as she met the mat face first yet again. The sleepless night had her concentration completely in the crapper and John Mark knew it. He reveled in the fact that she wasn't operating at one hundred percent and in the torture he inflicted on her. Her body was battered and bruised. She ached from head to toe. Yet, she rallied up her strength to face him again.

"You'd be dead by now if I were an enemy!" John Mark swept Kacie's feet out from under her with a swift kick and pinned her face first to the mat. The girl wasn't worth a shit today, mainly because she wasn't paying attention. Her mind was somewhere else, on something other than training with him and he had a feeling Tristen's conspicuous absence was the cause.

"I know. I know." Kacie sputtered as she wiggled uselessly beneath the bulk of John Mark's muscular body. "I'd be dead and the Rogues would take over the world," she huffed.

"COME on, Kacie. Where is your head today?" John Mark frowned and released his hold. He scooped her up off the mat and set her on her feet. She wobbled a little then righted her footing. He extended his body to its full height and towered over her. He didn't need a poser on his team. She was either in this or she wasn't. And he needed to know before he sent her out into the field and ended up with a dead body on his hands. "This is serious business. If you can't do it, if you want out, say so now and quit wasting our time."

Kacie plopped onto the mat and sat on her butt, tucking her knees under her chin. Her bottom lip quivered as she looked up at the male towering over her. John Mark was pissed at her. His big body practically ripped with fury and rightly so. If her head weren't in the game she'd get herself and possibly someone else killed. "I'm sorry. I just...I didn't sleep last night. I know my head isn't on right this morning." She snuffled and wiped away a tear. Glaring at the crystalline drop on the end of her fingertip, she wondered where in the hell that had come from. She was not a cryer. Today, it seemed like the least little thing was capable of setting off a major downpour. "Can't you give me a break, for once. I'll try harder. I promise."

John Mark rolled his eyes, women and their tears. He'd always been a sucker and always would be. Typically, he didn't give anyone a break. Ever. But, Kacie had been through some serious shit recently. Carter had everyone a little tense and the collective mood in the compound was dark. Wolves were far more sensitive than what they pretended to be. She'd probably picked up on the hailstorm that was Carter's mental state. And yeah, that was enough to put anybody into a crying jag. "

You'd better. You have to understand that you are my responsibility. If I feel that you're not strong enough to take on the Rogues, I will pull you out. I don't have a choice. I won't lose another life to them." He shook his head. Remembering Lucien, his mentor, his leader, his friend and the night when the rogues stole Lucien's life from him. He squared his shoulders and extended his hand, helping Kacie up. "Give me ten on the treadmill and then cool off. We'll give it another go tomorrow. And take care of business. Whatever has you so distracted, deal with it. Today."

"Ok. I will." Kacie took a deep breath and took a towel from John Mark. Sponging it over her sweaty neck, she took a deep breath. She didn't pry. But, something bad had happened, not so long ago. She could see it on John Mark's stony expression.

Kacie set an easy pace, concentrating on the whirring of the motor and the pounding of her feet on the belt as she gave John Mark his ten miles. Her body heated up. Sweat rolling down her cheeks and her lungs heaving with exertion as her muscles contracted and released with each mile she ran.

Tristen had her head and her heart tied up in knots. He'd loved her with such gentleness. He'd taken so much time and care exploring her. And then to turn on her with such anger, over a concept, a feeling that couldn't be proven. Love. She could have lied. Promised him everything he wanted and taken everything he offered, but she hadn't. She wouldn't. He had his lofty principles to protect. Well, she had hers too. Love was for suckers and bored housewives. Love was nothing but a fairy tale, just another fence that threatened to cage her. This, the pounding of her feet on the treadmill and the air scissoring in and out of her lungs, was real.

She kicked up the speed on the treadmill. Pushing Tristen and his demands out of her head. She ran with a hurried pace, panting from exertion. Struggling to escape the feelings that she would rather dismiss than confront head on. Truth, she felt something for him. Love? Lust? Was there a difference? She supposed it didn't really matter. In a way, she owed him a great big thank you. He'd put an end to their little tryst before she'd had the chance to make a complete fool out of herself.

Ok, so she loved him. She couldn't lie to herself about that. Marriage? That was a whole different story. Forever, the word might as well be a mountain. Forever meant a lot more in wolf time than in human time. Humans couldn't grasp the concept of forever. Neither could she. She'd been a complete idiot. Thinking that Tristen would be satisfied with her love. Oh no! He wanted her, not for now or for a few years, but forever? Not happening.

She increased the incline on the treadmill and poured on more speed. Pushing past the point of exhaustion. In retrospect, maybe she should have lied. Told him exactly what he wanted to hear if only to get him to do the deed. Prove to him that the myths weren't true and purge him out of her system. That was what was wrong with her. OF COURSE! She hadn't thought about that. He presented a challenge. And she didn't like losing. Why the hell was she torturing herself like this? It didn't matter anyway. They were through. Game over.

It was for the best anyway. Tristen, as good as he was with the things he did to her, had never gone all the way before. He was a virgin or whatever the male version of a virgin was. It was a load off her mind that she wouldn't be the one to spoil his wicked innocence. Thoughts of the woman that one day would, rankled her. That bitch would be everything he needed her to be. Soft. Pure. Committed. Absolutely fucking perfect for him. And he'd love her for it. He'd get the wife he demanded out of the deal. No doubt about that. And they'd be so damned...fucking perfect together. The thought of it made her nauseous and well, jealous as hell.

Tristen spent the night in the garage, pacing agitatedly back and forth, and replaying the argument over and over in his mind. The truth was ugly. Kacie had wounded his pride when she shot him down. He offered her his heart and she'd thrown it back in his face. The wound was still raw and festering around the edges. His jaw tensed as a pang of anger tugged at the tender injury. He shouldn't have to go back to her begging. He wasn't the only one that had committed a wrong. She had too. Why should HE be the only one suffering so? Why should HE be the one to come crawling on all fours? SHE owed him an apology too. Maybe he'd just sit tight and wait for her to come to him. See how long SHE could hold out.

What would he say to Kacie when they were face to face again? Nothing sounded right. She pushed him past the point of logic and to a place where nothing made sense. He really had been an ass to her. That he regretted with every fiber of his being. Idiot. Jackass. He shouldn't have pushed. Kacie wasn't a woman who would respond to demands. He knew that. She was a woman that would need time and patience. Coaxing. He'd be lucky if she ever spoke to him again. He deserved it if she didn't. Who was he to think that he knew everything about women, love, and forever? He sure the hell didn't.

Tristen ran his hands through his hair and pulled at the strands out of frustration. Hadn't he leaned anything from his dad? Forever even when promised with an open and full heart, was still a relative term. His mom and dad had promised one another forever. And after she died, his dad spent the next ten years chasing forever down. All anyone was ever promised was the moment right in front of them.

In his mind, his heart and head battled fiercely. His heart cried for him to go to her. Drop to his knees at her feet and beg for forgiveness. Promise to meet any terms she laid out for him. His head, his pride argued that he shouldn't have to be the first one to cave. SHE should come to HIM and GROVEL at HIS feet. SHE rejected him, not the other way around. He'd given her everything. EVERYTHING. And she'd thrown it in his face. Nope. No way. He wasn't going to go to her first. DAMN WOMAN. SHE could come to HIM.

Tristen popped the hood of the Camaro and studied the engine. Finally, set to doing something with a woman, a REAL lady, that he understood implicitly. He sorted through the tools he'd scattered across the floor last night in his fit of rage, searching for a wrench in the size he needed. With a few adjustments, his girl would purr with appreciation. SHE understood him.

Chapter 58

Jan rubbed her belly contentedly. Finally, her mother had gotten this wedding planning under control and had called at the crack of dawn to tell her all about it. Thanks to Thomas's crazy schedule, they were awake anyway. Ha! Looks like Janine had wormed her way into being instrumental after all. Good! That left so much less for her to do. She propped up her swollen feet and breathed a sigh of relief. The baby pressed down on her pelvis. Even Thomas's last exam had confirmed what she already knew. By the end of this week or maybe the beginning of next, she was going to be a mother. NOT till after Friday evening and the wedding, however. She would NOT be in labor while her mother was saying her 'I dos'.

She listened to her mother excitedly babble on about Kacie and how good she looked in her bridesmaid dress. Kacie in a dress? Seems a rabbit had been pulled out of the hat on that one. Jan had no doubt that a certain love interest had more to do with getting her into a dress than her mother had. Not that she'd ever voice her suspicions to her mom. It was better to let her mom revel in her moment of triumph.

The sounds of a commotion down the hall drew her attention. "Mom, I've got to go," she said. Hanging up the phone, she rolled onto her feet. She'd never heard such a string of curses coming from Thomas's mouth. "What are you doing?" She asked peering into the pink room that in a week or so would become a nursery.

Thomas looked up from the directions and scowled at the pile of spindles and screws strewn across the floor. Who knew putting a crib together could be such a pain in the ass? Easy to follow instructions? HA! He couldn't figure out which part was tab A and where in the hell tab B even was. "I promise I will have this crib together in time."

"I'm sure you will." She shook her head and waddled out of the room. When he had that look on his face, the best thing to do was to make a hasty retreat. When he finally gave up, she'd slip in there and put the thing together.

She stepped out onto the porch. The air was warm and filled with sunshine. Spring was everywhere around her bursting forth with new life. When she first came here over a year ago. She was looking for a quiet place to disappear from the obligations that she thought fate had saddled her with. This tiny town was just another one of many places for her to hang her hat. Her stay was supposed to be temporary. Somehow, this place had transformed and became her home.

She smiled as a police cruiser pulled into the drive. "Hey Mack!"

Mack slid back the brim of his standard issue hat and lifted his sunglasses from his nose. "How's that great-grand baby of mine doing?"

"Due any day now." She gave Mack a loose hug and ushered Thomas's grandfather inside. Mack was robust for his age. His blue eyes were lined with the burdens that came with a lifetime of seeing the darker side of life and the worst that people had to offer. His skin was permanently tanned and weathered from exposure to years of sun, wind, and cold. The career he'd chosen hadn't been an easy one. Despite his strong exterior and the way he tried to hide the toll the years of being a sheriff had taken on him, Jan could see the strain of the weighing heavily on his shoulders. "Thomas is in the nursery trying to put together the crib."

"That bad?" Mack grinned as Jan nodded her head. "Sometimes, I think that boy didn't get any of my DNA at all." He snickered, "of course, that's why he's a doctor instead of a beat cop. I'll go see what I can do. Can't have any great-grandchild of mine sleeping in a drawer now can I?"