Decisions

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Whitney makes a decision that affects her future.
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We all make decisions in life that we may or may not live to regret. I guess that I'm one of the lucky ones that have survived a really bad decision.

It was my decision to leave home after an argument with my mother over the boy that I was seeing. It was my decision to move in with him and it was my decision to have sex with him.

What followed was not always my decision but it was a result of my decision.

When I moved in with Johnny I thought we would live in an apartment of our own, not some run down squat in a run down section of town inhabited by a bunch of kids who had all run away from home, some from violence, some from abuse and some like me who thought that we just couldn't get along with our parents' discipline any more.

Johnny and I shared a dirty mattress in one corner of one of the rooms while Jan and Pete shared an equally dirty one in another corner. I got on okay with Jan but Pete and Johnny were always fighting about money and drugs.

I think that after I'd been there for a month I'd just about reached the decision to go back home, but circumstances prevented it. Johnny had been out looking for drugs as usual, he was into speed and ice and sometimes crack, and these cost him every cent he could lay a hand on. I think he was dealing as well.

Soon after moving into the squat we were lying on our bed listening to Pete and Jen going at it. She was kneeling on the mattress and he was fucking her from behind, that seemed to be their favourite position. I was getting a little turned on by watching them and listening to Jen grunting every time Pete pushed into her, when I felt Johnny's hand on my tits.

I pushed it away but it came back. "Come on Babe, you know you want it." I let him fondle me and kiss me. I was repulsed by his breath that smelled of drugs and decay but I still let him kiss me and push his tongue into my mouth.

I could feel myself getting wet between my legs and it made my decision a difficult one. Part of me wanted to stop him while another part wanted to feel his cock in my virgin pussy. The more that he kissed and fondled me, the more that I wanted him. I felt his hand slip under the waist band of my jeans and cover my pussy. I half knew that I wanted him to stop but the half that wanted him to continue opened my legs to allow him easier access. His finger pushed under the elastic of my panties and into my pussy.

Any residual inner strength that I had disappeared at this point and I found myself submitting to him entirely. He lifted my tee shirt over my head and removed my bra. I was naked from the waist up and vulnerable and he took full advantage of my vulnerability to press his advantage over me. He kissed my breasts while his hand undid the button at the waist of my jeans and lowered the zipper. His fingers worked on my pussy until all resistance left me.

I heard the zipper of his jeans and the rustle as he shrugged out of them, and then I felt the end of his cock at the entrance to my pussy. He shoved it hard into my pussy, and I screamed in pain as it ruptured my maidenhead. In that one harsh movement I was no longer a virgin. His cock pummelled in and out of my pussy until, with a grunt, he, with a final lunge, emptied himself inside me.

"Suck my cock Bitch." This was not the Johnny that I left home for. I had no option but to obey him. I licked his deflating cock, cringing, almost retching, at the taste of the mixture of his cum and the blood from my ruptured hymen.

His snoring next to me as I tossed and turned left me wondering what I had let myself in for, but, unknown to me there was worse, much worse to come.

Each night for the next week I was forced to submit to his callous stripping from me any innocence that remained. A week later Johnny had been away all day hoping to score enough for his personal use and have some left so that he would be able to sell some drugs, and when he came home he had three other men with him.

They stood talking to each other at the entrance to the squat, all the time they looked at me. I didn't know what they were talking about, but it seemed that they were discussing something to do with me.

Johnny led me into our room and undressed me. He left the room for a couple of minutes and returned holding an open can of Lemon Rusky, "Here drink this, it'll make you feel better. After I'd emptied the can he pushed me onto my knees on the mattress and began to fuck me. After about five minutes he rolled onto his back and pulled me over him, pulling me down so that I was lying on top of him he fed his cock into my pussy. I was feeling quite dizzy at this point. He was pushing up into me when I felt another cock push into my ass.

I cried out in pain as this second cock forced its way roughly into my virgin ass-hole. I heard a noise and when I looked up I saw the other two men kneeling near my face, their cocks in their hand. One pushed his into my face. "Suck on this you slut!" His hand grabbed my hair and pulled my face until his cock was against my mouth. I refused to open it. "Open up slut!" He shouted at me. His hand came down hard on the side of my face. I opened my mouth and he shoved it inside.

My mind became a blur after that, I seemed to vaguely remember all four of them fucking my cunt and ass. All four of them in turn rammed his cock into my mouth. By the time they had finished and the three men had left, my jaw ached, my cunt was sore and my ass felt as if someone had rammed a baseball bat into it.

Johnny stayed out in the main room doing drugs, I don't know what it was, while I lay in bed whimpering in agony and wondering what was going to be next.

Next was more of the same. It became a regular thing for Johnny to come home with two or three other men and they would fuck me until they were satisfied, leaving me sore and sinking deeply into depression. Johnny suggested that I take some speed or ice to get over my depression but I refused. "Please yourself, but stop complaining, I did offer."

About three months after this had begun I had just about reached rock bottom. I hadn't had a bath for over a week and knew I must have stunk of sweat and, even though I had cleaned as much off as I could, stale semen. It repulsed me because when I lived at home I was scrupulously clean at all times. It was then that I noticed two things. The first was that my period had not come as expected and I also felt an irritation around my cunt.

Johnny was out as usual and I sat talking to Jan. "I'm worried and I don't know what to do."

"What's wrong?"

"I haven't had my period and I have this itch around my cunt."

"Fuck Whitney, we'd better get you to a clinic and get you checked over."

After the people at the clinic had gotten over the shock at my appearance they were quite good. They did a pregnancy test which confirmed the worst and they then examined me and confirmed that I had contracted an STD. I was given antibiotics to take in the hope that it would clear up. I hoped that at the very least I wouldn't have to put out for Johnny's 'friends' that night.

I told Johnny that I was pregnant and that I also had an STD and he told me to shut the fuck up about it. There were three other men that night and Johnny was more violent towards me than usual, he seemed to take pleasure in the rough way that he fucked me and, when he took his turn fucking my mouth he held my head and forced his cock so far into my mouth I almost choked.

It took almost two hours for them to gain their satisfaction and they all left me, lying, with drying cum on my tits and belly, in my hair and all over my face, as well as the cum that had leaked out of my cunt, on the mattress sobbing. I heard someone approaching. I looked up and it was one of the men. "No please, no more, please no more."

"Are you all right?" I remembered this one, he seemed to hold back and played little part in my debasement. "When was the last time you had a decent meal and a bath?"

"I don't know." I sobbed.

"Come." He held out his hand and helped me to my feet. He found a pair of jeans, I didn't even know if they were mine, they were very loose on me, and a shirt and jacket. The clothes were filthy, but I put them on.

"What if Johnny sees me?" I said as he led me from the room.

"He's gone off with the others to score. I don't think he'll be back for a while." He led me out into the night and we walked for several blocks until we came to an apartment building. "I live here."

He helped me up several flights of stairs to his apartment. "First things first, I think a bath for you." He led me into the bathroom and while he ran a steaming hot bath with scented bath oils in it I took off my clothes. I didn't care that he was in the room with me, he'd seen it all before. He felt the temperature of the water and helped me into the tub. "I want you to have a nice long soak while I rustle up something for you to eat."

He left me in the bath and I lay back, allowing the hot scented water to soothe my aches and pains. I must have dozed off because the next thing he was standing beside the bath with a large fluffy towel in his hands. "Come on, out you get." He held out the towel and as I stood up he wrapped it around me. He was so gentle as he dabbed me dry. Taking care not to put too much pressure on the many bruises that covered my body. "You really have had a rough time of it haven't you?"

He wrapped a bathrobe around me and led me out into the kitchen where a couple of plates sat steaming on the table. "I'm sorry it's only frozen meals but that's all I have at the moment."

Frozen was more than I'd had for months and I gulped it down so quickly I was finished almost before he started on his. He pushed the plate over to me, "Here, you need this more than I do." I only took a short while longer to finish that one.

While I ate he sat there staring at me, "What are you looking at?" I was uncomfortable under his gaze.

"I'm Steve by the way, and you are?"

"Whitney, don't laugh, I don't know how many times my mother has seen the Bodyguard, but she is a big fan."

"You don't look like the average prostitute, you must have been pretty at one stage, and not that long ago I would guess. What made you go on the game?"

"What do you mean prostitute, I'm not a prostitute, I don't get paid for it!" I was angry at the suggestion. There was never any discussion with Johnny about me charging for sex.

"Well tonight cost me a hundred bucks, I don't know how much the others paid but I think they paid in drugs."

"That bastard! How dare he do that to me! I was under the impression that I was doing it as a favour for him."

"We have to decide what we are going to do with you. You can stay here for the time being."

"I can't stay here because I have a couple of problems and I don't think that you'll want me here."

"What problems?"

"One is that I'm pregnant and the other is that I have an STD that I'm supposed to be taking antibiotics for, and I left them at the squat, and I don't think that I want to go back there."

"That's not a problem. I'll take you to my doctor tomorrow for more medication and I'll support whatever decision you make about the baby. Now it's time for you to get some sleep." He led me to his second bedroom. On the bed was a large tee shirt that would work as a night shirt. There were no panties but that was no big deal, unless he decided that he wanted a fuck in return for saving me.

He saw the look on my face and knew exactly what I was thinking, "Don't worry I won't bother you and it's not because of what you have. I just think the best thing for you is to get some rest." In a way I was disappointed.

I don't know how long I had been asleep but I was woken by a loud banging at the front door, it sounded as if someone was trying to break the door down. That was confirmed when I hear the door frame splinter and the door crash into the room. "Where the fuck is she, Whitney where the fuck are you?"

I heard Steve's voice, it had a calm authority about it. "Just leave her alone, and leave right now and you won't get into trouble."

"And what are you going to do about it Smartarse."

"I just might stop you."

"Yeah, you and whose army?" He put two fingers between his lips and blew a shrill whistle. I heard running footsteps and assumed reinforcements had arrived. I scrambled out of bed and started to walk towards them.

I heard the sound of someone punching someone else, and then I heard Johnny yell at the others to give him a hand. When I got to the door I saw Johnny just getting off the floor while the other two men held Steve. "I'll show you, you bastard." Johnny said as he hit Steve several times in the mouth.

"Stop that!" I screamed at them. The two men let Steve go and he fell to the floor. I ran across the room and threw myself on top of him trying to protect him from further damage. I felt someone kick me in the side and was sure that a rib had broken. A second kick, to the abdomen this time, lifted me and hurled me across the floor. I curled up in a ball and lay there hoping that there would be no more pain.

"You're coming with me." Johnny said as he grabbed me by the hair and dragged me to my feet.

"She's not going anywhere." A man stood where the front door used to be and in his hand was a pistol. "The police will be here shortly, and you three are going to stand there like good little boys and wait for them to arrive.

Johnny started to run towards the man but there was the sound of a gunshot and a scream as Johnny fell to the floor holding his knee. He waved the pistol at the other two men. "Don't you try anything similar or you'll meet the same fate."

"No, no, don't shoot."

I heard the sound of footsteps in the passageway. "Hello Sarge, what are you doing here?"

"I live next door and heard a disturbance and thought I'd investigate. These three you can take away and book for assault, I'll sign a witness statement tomorrow. In the mean time these two are in need of medical treatment."

The ambos arrived and lifted Steve onto a stretcher and then focussed on me. "Holy shit, look at all of those bruises, it looks as if she's been systematically beaten over a long period of time."

When I complained of having difficulty breathing they examined me closely and found the broken rib. One of them noticed that I was bleeding from my cunt. I was placed on a drip and a mask placed over my face and that was the last thing I remembered until I woke up in a hospital bed.

"Where am I?"

"You're in hospital, don't worry, we'll take extra good care of you. In the mean time I'll call the Doctor and tell her that you are awake."

Several minutes later a young woman in a medical gown came into the room. "How are you feeling today?"

"Awful, I ache all over. What has happened to me?"

"You were brought in three days ago. You were in a pretty bad way and have been under some heavy sedation since then. I have to tell you that you've lost the baby, the kick to the abdomen has caused a mis-carriage." She seemed puzzled by my lack of concern, how could I tell her that I was glad to be rid of the child whose father I didn't even know. I didn't know which of the many men who had fucked me over the last few months would have been the father of the bastard in my belly.

"You will be here for another week or two before we release you to the detox clinic to help you get off the drugs."

"Drugs, what drugs, I don't do drugs!"

"Are you telling me that you haven't popped any pills or anything like that?"

"No, I wouldn't do that."

"Then how do you explain the existence of the drug GBH in your system? Do you drink alcohol?"

"Johnny, he's my boyfriend, he gives me a can of something now and then."

"Do you see him open the can before he gave it to you?"

"No, he get's it from the other room and when he gives it to me it's already open. Why do you ask?"

"Because I think he has been lacing the drink with GBH. That's the drug commonly known as the date rape drug. Do you remember much after he gives it to you?"

"No, I usually don't remember anything until the next day."

She put her hand briefly on my shoulder, "Get some rest, as soon as you're well enough we'll get you somewhere where you can get treatment."

"Wait. Steve, he's they guy that was brought in with me, how's he getting on?"

"He's doing as well as can be expected under the circumstances."

"Can I see him?"

"I'll get someone to take you to see him, but you won't be able to speak to him."

"Why not? Is he badly hurt?"

"Let's just say that you've come out of this lightly in comparison. Do you still want to see him?"

"Yes." I was worried about him. It was my fault that he was in hospital, if he hadn't tried to help me he wouldn't have been bashed up by Johnny and his friends.

Half an hour later a porter came into the room with a wheel chair and took me down to see Steve in Intensive Care. He looked terrible, lying there with tubes and wires hanging off him. His face was swollen and there were bits of wire poking out of the skin on his jaw. He was conscious and turned towards me as I was wheeled in. His face was unable to smile but his eyes were, he seemed pleased to see me. The porter wheeled me over to his bedside and I took his hand and lowered my face to it. The tears started and just wouldn't stop. I felt his hand close on mine and squeeze it.

They left me there for at least an hour before taking me back to my room. "Will he get better?" I asked the Doctor that was just coming in as we left the ward.

"It'll take time, but we think so."

When the Doctor stopped by the next day she asked me what my relationship with Steve was. "I only met him the night that I was brought in but I feel responsible for him being here."

"The reason that I ask is that after you had been to see him his condition made a significant improvement, it seems that you are good for him. That being the case we'll take you down every day to see him and see if the improvement continues."

"If I am helping him make an improvement why can't I stay there with him?"

"Not yet, we'll wait until he's out of Intensive Care and then think about it."

My visits to Steve got progressively longer as his condition improved until I was spending several hours each day at his bedside. At first I did all of the talking, chattering away about everything and nothing, whatever came into my head, except the events of that night, I avoided that entirely. These were the happiest times that I've known for some time.

There was one downer though. I asked the nurse if my mother had been informed that I was in hospital and I was saddened, but little surprised, when they told me that she knew but had decided that she wouldn't come in to see me. I was on my own.

The day came when I was released from the hospital and taken to the detox clinic, where I was to spend the next month, not so much to come off the drugs because once the GBH had been flushed from my system I was pretty much clean. I was there because Steve and the Sergeant, whose name was Trevor, had decided that it was the best place for me in the short term because Johnny would not be able to get to me and, I needed somewhere to stay seeing as how my mother wouldn't have me back and I had no money. I guess that they figured that, if I was placed in a shelter Johnny would find me.

Until he was released I travelled each day to the hospital and spent hours with him. After he was released he came by the clinic every day and we spent hours walking around the grounds just chatting and, as it turned out, getting to know each other better.

I learnt a lot about my previous life that had been lost in a haze. Not only had Johnny been paid for my services as a whore, but he had been having the whole thing video-taped and had sold the tapes to a porn site. I was disgusted by this when I found out. I was even more disgusted when I had to sit through one of the tapes. I had to admit that the person who covered up the bruising on my body had done a good job, but the brutal way that I was treated by the men who used me, and the way that I was degraded by having them jerk off all over my body, after they had cum in my cunt, my ass and my mouth. I felt so abused and humiliated that I just wanted to find the men that did it and kill them.

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