Denial Slut Learns to Cuck Ch. 03

8 Aug 2015.

Sir and I are laying here just appreciating each other while he reads and I write this as he requested. He always has me write after a punishment or a particularly intense scene just to help me process, and the experience he, Blair, and I shared this morning were intense at the very least. He says we are going to have a vanilla night to let me recover and so he can just take care of his girl tonight. I hate Hate HATE being punished, because it means I disappointed him, and it hurts so much to hurt him, but I love how he nurtures me afterwards. It's almost like aftercare for him too. Hmm. I guess Doms need that too.

So here's what happened. It all started last weekend when she got here. All I had to do was remember one thing. One silly little chore she told me to do. It wasn't even difficult or that big a deal. Basically, Blair had to leave straight from our house last Saturday to take her son to a birthday party. She told me to make sure that I switched the wash to the dryer so she had a clean vanilla outfit to wear and not just her sexy corset and thigh high fish nets. Something about that might not go over too well with the other moms, especially since Blair was also their kids' principal. And what did I forget to do!? Switch the wash!

I lucked out that she found something of mine that fit her to wear, because I don't know if I'd still be alive to tell the tale today otherwise. But this weekend is when I received my punishment. And let me tell you what, there was nothing to indicate that she had forgiven anything over the seven days we'd had apart. God I felt so stupid!

When it first happened, Sir told me to just go wait in the playroom. He knew that Blair was legitimately upset. She had every right to be freaking out; she only had a kinky, slutty outfit or a soaked vanilla set of clothes to wear to a 9-year-old's birthday party with people she had to maintain a positive professional relationship with. She was pissed and would have said something or done something she would have probably regretted as her Domme self once the panic subsided. Sir immediately removed me from the situation to protect both of his girls. He always knows exactly what to do and keeps us safe.

He took her to my wardrobe and apparently she found one of my dresses that I almost never wear to school that fit her well. It was colorful and flowy so the size being a bit too big wasn't as noticeable since it fit well anyway. Sir calmed me down while Blair got dressed. I felt so guilty. This was no longer about power exchange and kink. I felt bad that I had failed to meet her expectations and it had put her in a really compromising predicament. Sir said he understood that I was upset but to let myself relax for now since she had an outfit to wear and I could call her later to apologize. She just needed some space. I get that. I do. But I always want to make things better, ya know, like right away. But this is where I put myself into my slave mentality and allowed myself to accept that I was upset and didn't like the situation, but I needed to let it sit in the uncomfortable for now. I gave up control. It helped. My tears dried and our day continued uneventfully.

Long story short, I called to apologize and she accepted it and said we'd deal with it next weekend but that once we did it would be okay. She was okay. That was a comfort. When a Dom/me tells me it will be okay once we "deal" with something, I understand a consequence is coming, probably a harsh one in this case, but that they are giving me the chance to be forgiven and they still want me. Any time I upset or disappoint them, I worry they won't want me anymore, that they'll see I'm not good enough for them afterall. So telling me it will be okay soon really helps me be okay-ish which I think is where a slave who fucks up should be. Definitely not good. But definitely okay still.

This kind of emotional reinforcement comes with a cost though, and that is anticipation. I had the whole week to think about and dread my upcoming punishment.

And they had that time to plan...

So Friday night we're in the playroom, Sir has received his first orgasm, and I am humbling myself to the door as I am starting to really appreciate how it helps me find my place in our dynamic before we, or at least I, begin play. I feel a fist in my hair and I am pulled to my feet and over to the massage table we got to use for play.

They lay me on my back and put the Liberator wedge under my ass so it is raised about six inches above the height of where my shoulders meet the table. Using hemp rope, they each tie a leg by an ankle and thigh so my knees are pulled to my chest but opened wide. I am then tied down across my breasts and once more a little higher just under my collarbone. My wrists are then cuffed right to the sides of the Liberator. This puts me in a position where I just cannot move anything put my head. I writhe a bit when I realize how fully constrained I am. Sir notices that I can raise my hips too much for his liking so he ties me once more across my pelvis. This puts pressure just against my pelvic bone and sends need straight to my core.

Sir asks why I am being punished. I answer that I didn't do a specific task I was given to make sure to dry Blair's clothing for her in time for her departure.

He then asked what would have happened if there wasn't something in my closet that she could have worn. I responded with little confidence that I guess she'd have had to wait for her clothes to dry and been late to get her son to the party.

He finally asked if that would have been acceptable, and I of course said not at all.

Sir was convinced I understood why following the instruction was important logistically, and the three of us had already had a conversation about what forgetting a command like that communicates to a Dom/me such as lack of concern, little effort, laziness, etc.

Blair began to explain how my punishment would be a series of edges and ruined orgasms to increase my desperation to cum. While she explained, Sir covered me with a fleece blanket, began filling a bucket of cold water, and he started pouring it over my newly blanketed body. I was so confused until Blair said that my punishment would end when the blanket was dry.

My jaw dropped... That would literally take hours. They meant business. Oh jeez I really fucked up. But I immediately took a deep breath and reminded myself that I trust both of them fully. I guess they would trade off through the night if they needed to rest. There were two of them after all.

Sir rolled over the toy cart and I noticed for the first time that every toy that provided pleasure was out. There were even some toys that would enhance my pleasure through pain. He opened the tiny drawer at the top left and grabbed his leather knife. I jumped. He cut a hole in the blanket around my crotch and also each breast. He was creating access for the onslaught of pleasure-torture I was about to receive.

I could feel my cunt begin to drip already...