Desires within Young Girls Ch. 20-22

Chapter 20—Therapy?

I sat in Janet Billingsworth's office waiting for her to call me in. I had returned home Sunday after some rest and time away. I got in late Sunday night and got up early and left for work, so I haven't seen Brandi since my return. I had decided to schedule that follow-up visit with Janet—my therapist—even though I wasn't looking forward to it. How would I explain to her what I had done? How could I tell her that I didn't follow her advice, I didn't self-regulate, I lost control of the narrative, and, instead, spanked Brandi again, watched her masturbate, and fucked her?

"Sam? Come on in."

"Hi, Janet."

"Have a seat. Let's catch up on your situation. Let me just take a quick look at my notes."

I waited and fidgeted for a few agonizing moments while Janet read through her notes from my last visit a month ago. "I'll save you some time, Janet, and cut right to the chase. I failed miserably. I succumbed to the temptation and torture."

She looked up and didn't say anything.

"I had sex with Brandi." I continued. "I tried to avoid this. I really did. I tried to take hold of the narrative, but I couldn't. I'm weak, and I gave in to her seduction."

"Okay. Take a deep breath. Your language suggests that it's her fault because you couldn't control yourself from all of the temptation."

"No. No. It's not her fault. It's mine. I'm simply pointing out the reality, though, that she didn't make it easy to resist her. She made it hard... Uhmm. So to speak."

Janet was writing more notes.

"So, here I am feeling very guilty, and I'm at a loss as to what to do."

"Tell me what you want to do—assuming there were no constraints, no wife, no societal boundaries."

"That's easy. Fuck Brandi until I'm blue in the face."

"And then what?"

"Uhmm. What do you mean? Ah, I guess live happily ever after? Wait a second. Scratch that. We wouldn't live happily ever after, would we? I guess I'm thinking that if we did it as much as we wanted, we would soon get past it—we would have had our fun and experimentation—and we could move on with our lives."

"And you see no long term consequences to that plan if you were able to pull it off?"

"I don't know. You're probably right! This is an incredibly fucked up situation that I have created! What do I do now?"

"I take it Audrey does not know."

"That is correct. And I'd like to keep it that way."

"Do you want this marriage? Do you want her?"

"Yes! I mean, she's great in so many ways and doesn't deserve this. She would never cheat on me! But, my god, I'm just gonna be honest with you. I can't make it another year of Brandi's senior year in high school with us in the same house! I know this sounds terrible, but I lust for her! I want to fuck her. Like her mother, she is so incredibly hot, and she wears the clothes and undergarments to show it off. I can't live in that house with her parading around half naked. And now that we've done it, the pussy, errrr, uhmmm, I mean, cat, is out of the bag! She wants it too. Trust me."

"You may not like what I'm about to say, but your only solution may be to have Brandi, your wife, and you in here for some serious therapy where this all comes out in the open."

"NO! OH MY GOD, NO. You can't be serious?"

"Well, do you move out, Sam? You just told me that you can't control yourself."

I put my head in my hands. "Oh, god. What am I going to do?"

Janet didn't say anything. After a long pause, she said quietly. "I think you have one other solution, but, from your own admission, it's the hardest one of all."

"What's that?"

"Stop. Just stop. Every time you think about having sex with Brandi, DON'T! Go masturbate. Take a cold shower. Anything to keep you from perpetuating this."

I looked at her.

"There is one other possibility that is radical, and I don't advocate it. But in your situation, it might work."

"I'm desperate. Tell me."

"Go away with Brandi somewhere for a weekend or even a week. Fuck like bunnies. Do it until you're exhausted. And tell her in no uncertain terms—this is it! The last time forever."

"Seriously? Like that scene in one of those John Irving novels?"

"Understand. It's not my choice that you do this. My choice is that you act like an adult, and come to grips with the reality that you can't act on every impulse, you can't have whatever you want, Sam. You need a little tough love, right now. You are acting worse than her, because you are the adult who knows better. But you're acting like a child. I know from so many male clients that to be a man in modern society is torture. Pure torture. Every day. Because underneath the veneer of civilized behavior lies a primitive man with the same impulses he's always had. But, yet, they aren't allowed to behave that way, even though we are now in a society that is even more promiscuous, even more in your face with sexuality—from beer commercials to Victoria's Secret models. The Internet is both the proof of what I'm saying—porn is a multi-billion dollar business—and part of the problem—because it's so readily available. I get it. I really do. The girls Brandi's age are all wearing tight jeans and sexy underwear, because all of the boys they are trying to impress have grown on up on internet porn. That's why they are all shaving their pussies. But you can't continue to do this. It will end miserably. Trust me."

"So if I understand you correctly, you don't advocate the method, but if it works, you agree with the end result. The ends justify the means?"

"If it will get you to stop having sex with your step-daughter, then I can justify it. So, yes, in this case, the ends may justify the means. I will tell you that this is wholly unconventional advice. I suppose some might think that I should lose my license to practice therapy. But unless you put an end to this with your own willpower—which is the way I prefer you do it—then, I don't know what else to tell you. Other than to get this out in the open and have a chance for healing."

"Janet, there would be no healing. I would be dead."

"Tell me how this incident happened. How many times have you had sex with Brandi?"

"One and a half."

"One and a half? Huh?"

"We went all the way, and then the next day we, ah, uhmm, touched each other to orgasm."

"Okay. That's twice in my book."

"And I watched her masturbate again. Only this time she knew I was there and wanted me to see."

"Now we're up to three times. Jesus, Sam. Have you spanked her since we last talked?"

"Yes. Twice."

"Oh my god. Okay, this is out of control."

"And we sexted and had phone sex while I was in California last week."

"Sam! This is a full blown sexual relationship!"

"I know." I said sheepishly. "I've completely lost any control or willpower. And while I'm confessing, I guess I should tell you that I had sex with two prostitutes while I was in California."

"What? Sam, what is wrong with you? Are you that horny? So, now you are cheating on Brandi!"

"I couldn't help it! One of our best clients paid for it. He insisted. What was I to do?"

"What were you to do? You tell him that you can't do that. That's what you tell him! My god, Sam! You are behaving in a very reckless manner. In fact, after hearing all of this, I think we need to talk about a whole different solution."

"Okay, please tell me."

"You're a sex addict! I think you may need rehab! You might need to go away and get some professional help."

"Sex addict? Aren't I just a healthy male with a healthy libido?"

"But Sam other men have the same libidos, and they don't have sex with every woman living in the house, and they don't hire prostitutes when they are away on business."

"You may be surprised to know how often that happens. Look at the businessmen who travel to Thailand and the Philippines. What do you think they're doing over there? That's big business."

"But Sam that is still reckless! There are many men who don't do that! Why not be like them?"

"What do they do to control themselves?"

"They masturbate! A lot! I've had clients who told me they masturbated half a dozen times a day! And I'm okay with that. It's a control mechanism. And no one gets hurt, and no one gets STDs!"

"I'm masturbating too! I told you about that. But Brandi is in my face! And, lately, Audrey is horny as hell. She suddenly seems to want it all the time."

"Then by all means have lots of sex with your wife! And masturbate more! But, good god, Sam, you can't sit here and tell me that it's somehow okay for you to visit hookers and have sex with your stepdaughter! That's not okay! In fact, the basis of forming a society and making rules comes from this very problem! The men were busy indiscriminately screwing every girl in the tribe—the wives, the daughters, the sisters—anything with a vagina, and it wreaked havoc on the social order. Rules had to be imposed, and men had to follow them. And that means you, Sam!"

I had never quite seen Janet so forceful, but she was clearly upset with me, and she had every right to be. I had majorly screwed up. I am a cad! And I was on a tragic trajectory.

"Janet, I'm sorry. What should I do?"

"I could give you a prescription to curtail your libido. I wasn't thinking in that direction, but I'm now thinking that that may be the way to go. And I think you need to have a very long talk with Brandi and end it. As soon as possible." Janet thought for a minute. "I tell you what. Let's not go the prescription route. Too risky. Too many potential side effects, and it's typically prescribed for sex offenders. Even though you have crossed some lines, I don't consider you a sex offender. So, I want to start with chasteberry. It's a natural supplement that the monks used to take to curb their libidos. There isn't much clinical research to support that, but I've had some success with it with other clients. You can get it at any of the stores that sell supplements. It's hard to determine dose, so whatever bottle you purchase, follow the directions, and let's see if that has any impact."

"What about the week away with Brandi?"

"Like I said, I don't advocate that, but if it will end your illicit affair with Brandi, then it will obviously be worth it."

"I want to see you weekly for awhile. I think talking about this may help. So, how does next Tuesday look?"

"Good. I'll do it. See you next week."

"And Sam?"

"Yes Janet?"

"Please try self-control. Go masturbate the next time Brandi gets you excited."

"No problem. I'll do my best."

Chapter 21—Out of Control

I left Janet's office a little after 5PM. Audrey told me that she was working late and probably wouldn't be home until after 9. Shit. If I went to the house, I'd be alone with Brandi. I could go drink until 9, but I decided it was time to face up and try to act like an adult. This would be my first real test. If I could pass it, it would be easier the next time. I decided. I would go to the house and have a talk with Brandi.

When I walked in, I saw her standing there, hair in a ponytail, her familiar tight jeans, and a white, tight tube top. Her belly and belly button were exposed. We stood for a split second staring at each other, and then, almost simultaneously, we ran to each other. She threw her arms around me, and I clutched her body, wrapping my arms around her waist and taking her in, inhaling her odor, feeling her lithe body rubbing up against me, feeling her little ass squirming underneath my hands. She nuzzled my neck and kissed me deeply on the mouth. I scooped her up and carried her over to the sofa and threw her down.

I was done with will power. I had lost the battle before it started. It was no use. I couldn't resist her smile, her charm, her youth and beauty.

I pulled her jeans down, slid off her panties, and buried my face in her little, tight fuck hole. I was an animal, and she screamed with delight. I licked and licked her little slit, darting my tongue in and out; it was divine—she tasted and smelled so fucking good. And she had shaved most of her pubic hair, and her little pussy looked delicious!

I pulled off my shirt, slid down my jeans and boxers, and I mounted her. I wasted no time. I stuffed my cock right up her slit and humped her mound like a wild crazed dog. I was crazy! I humped and grunted and nuzzled and nibbled her, biting her nipples, sucking her lips, nibbling her ears. I thrust my cock with all my might inside of her, slapping my balls against her ass with every plunge. I pulled her hair back and licked her neck and fucked and fucked and fucked her little sweetness. She screamed and cooed underneath me, her legs tightly wrapped around my thrusting pelvis. When my orgasm built, I didn't wait. I wasn't interested in satisfying her this time. I wanted release. I wanted my pleasure. And I wanted to use her body like a rag doll. I needed to release the pressure, and as I exploded inside of her, I gripped her tightly, my head buried in her hair, my dick pulsating and spewing cum against the walls of her womb.

I collapsed on top of her. She was crying again... and giggling.

Chapter 22—A Plan for Release

"Brandi, look at me."

She sat up panting and smiling. "Yes, Samuel?"

"Listen to me closely. You have exams this week. That is all I want you to focus on. We will have no more sex, no teasing, no nothing for the next week."

"But Sam!"

"No buts. But here's what we're going to do when exams are over. I'm going to talk to your mom and convince her that I should take you on a business trip with me as a treat for finishing exams and to see what the world of work is like. I'm thinking a few days."

"Really? Are we going to stay together and fuck?"

"That's the plan. We're going to fuck until we're exhausted. I'm going to have my way with your tight little body in every way I can imagine!"

"Oh my god, Sam! I love you! Yes!"

"But until then, nothing. Do you understand?"

"Yes! I can do that!"

"Good. Now go study, and I'll make you some dinner."

"Yes sir! And I love you!!"

Brandi ran up the stairs bursting with happiness. I could tell. Now I just had to convince her mom of my plan.

Audrey strode through the front door around 9:30. "Hey, how are you? Happy to be home?"

"Yes." I said, and I gave her a kiss.

We talked for a few minutes about work and Brandi's exam schedule.

"Speaking of Brandi's exams, I've got an idea."

"What's that?"

"I was thinking about taking her with me on a business trip after exams are over. It would be a little bit of a reward for buckling down, and she could get a taste of the world of work. I was thinking she could go with me to meet some clients and kind of be my assistant."

"Wait a second. You wanna take my gorgeous daughter with you on a trip, just the two of you?"

"Yeah. What's wrong with that? I've been here plenty of times with her when you were gone."

"In the same hotel room?"

"Well, I guess I don't understand what you think is going to happen, but no, not in the same hotel room. I was going to get her her own room with my hotel points. Work will pay for my room."

"Hmmm. I don't know. I've been meaning to talk to you. It's not like I haven't noticed you looking at her lately."

"What do you mean?"

"You know very well what I mean, Sam. You've looked at her with that look that guys have when they're looking at hot girls. You've looked at me that way before. And she's been acting kind of funny around you. Almost like she's been flirting with you."

"Really? I'm not sure I've noticed."

"Oh, Sam. Come on. You haven't seen her when she gives you a hug or walks by you seductively? I know what she's doing. I've done it myself. Exactly when I was her age."

"I think she's just growing up, and if I looked at her in any way that you think is inappropriate, I'll not do that."

"Oh, it's not like I blame you. She's gorgeous. So, are the two of you going to promise me that you won't come back in love with each other? You're pretty hot yourself." Audrey smiled.

"Of course we won't, Audrey. I want her to see what I do with clients. You know, let her tag along. And we'll stay at a nice hotel with a pool, so she can do some swimming and tanning."

"When are you thinking?"

"I was thinking the week after next. I need to make a trip to Atlanta, so I thought we could fly down on a Sunday or Monday and stay for the week."

Audrey was looking at her calendar. "Why don't we all go and make it a family vacation? I don't see anything pressing that week."

"Ah, uhmm, okay, well I hadn't thought about that. I thought it would be some father/daughter bonding time."

"Yeah, you could still do that during the day. I'll stay at the pool while you two go to work. Hahaha."

"Ah, yeah, okay, well, yeah I guess that could work." I was thinking desperately. How could I ward off the family vacation plan?

"Oh, wait a second. I have a big presentation to give on that Wednesday. I see it in my notes, but I didn't add it to my calendar. Darn. I guess you two will have to go it alone." She looked up at me.

That was a close one. She's noticed me looking at Brandi? I've been gone for a week! When did she notice that? I need to be more careful. And when did she see Brandi hugging me? Flirting with me? I wondered if it wasn't that woman's intuition kicking in. Maybe?