Dick

Bette was around the other side with the door opened for Mal.

"Hi Dick," Mal said removing his tie but keeping the top button done up.

"Hi Mal. Your girls save the day. I was ready to whack the officious twerp."

"Good staff is hard to find these days Dick, as well you will know."

As they walked into the restaurant and began the long walk to their table, at the center of the windows overlooking the town below them, the resident singer with piano and double bass accompaniment began singing 'Happy Birthday' and when Pearl heard it was for Pearl she stopped and hugged Mal. He claimed innocence so she hugged Dick and he shrugged so she looked at Kade and Kade smiled, "When I called to give your PA the place and time for tonight she mentioned it would be a lovely night out for you as it was your birthday next day." The two women hugged and then both waved to the singer. It was only then Dick realized Pearl was not yet thirty and if they stayed perhaps she and Kade would become close friends. He thought he'd stay clear of Pearl and actually it was a great idea because he would have close business dealings with her husband if Mal became their hotel general manager.

Pearl was sitting against the window, Dick was next to her, Mal was opposite him and that left the two women facing each other. Dick thought that was good as there was no need to spend the night looking down the front of a woman's dress. Pearl had a great pair and rather a lot of that flesh was uncovered. He looked across at Kade and realized she was looking down Pearl's dress. That unnerved him, as he hadn't been aware women did that. Then Pearl's thigh seemed to close the gap between her and his thighs. He went to pull his thigh away but thought she might think he wasn't interested, er wasn't friendly.

"How old tomorrow Pearl -- twenty-eight?"

"Dick!"

"It's okay Kade, twenty-seven actually. I'm exactly nine years older that Mal. We picked you are twenty-five Kade and Dick is thirty-five but we didn't have to guess Dick's age because it was given in the newspaper when the purchase of the hotel was announced.

"Kade is twenty-three, Dick said, any older and I wouldn't be regarded as a baby-snatcher.

Pearl exhibited a delightful giggle. "And here was Mal thinking he had that title to himself. Have you been married before Dick?"

"No, I felt I was too irresponsible to marry before my mid-thirties. It must have worked because Kade's youthfulness makes me feel old."

"Liar -- he's almost too energetic for me," Kade said. "I walk around most mornings half-exhausted, that is the mornings when I can walk."

A silence fell over the table.

Dick could feel Pearl's body shaking and then she slammed against him, smothering near hysterical laughter into the shoulder of his jacket. That set her three companions off into laughter, Mal having recovered from initial shock.

"Oh I'm sorry Dick," Pearl said, leaning over to brush his shoulder with her napkin, saying her lip coating would not have come off. A big breast was now against his arm, her thigh was almost rolling over the top of his and her caught the fragrance of her perfume rising from between her breasts. She dropped the napkin. Dick caught it and returned it, dragging his hand over her breast as he did so. He was aghast and began to sweat, hoping it wouldn't show. A drop of sweat ran down into his left eye.

Bathroom! He jumped up and knocked the drinks tray from the hand of an arriving waitress to take their drinks order. He lunged and caught the tray but in doing so knocked the waitress on to the back of an elderly guy at the next table who snorted and said he wanted red wine, not sex. Dick leant over and pulled the waitress upright, wiping the sweat off his forehead against her tiny breasts as he did so and apologized to her.

"That all right sir, this happens to us all the time. Dick pulled out a $20 and stuck it down the top of her high neck dress and asked her to get the gentleman's bottle of red wine and charge it to his table.

"Oh you're such a lovely man," the waitress said, kissing Dick and turning to the elderly guy said in a loud voice, "The young gentleman apologizes for the accident and is paying for you wine."

"Right, just don't stand there -- get the wine and don't shout. Just because I have white hair doesn't mean I'm deaf."

Dick slid back into his seat and the laughing Pearl pulled him to her and kissed him on the mouth saying he was so entertaining and so much fun to be with.

Dick looked anxiously at Kade who managed a half smile. He turned to Mal and said. "Sorry to have made such a dick of myself." Pearl was off again, banging Dick on the back with her fist and then they were all laughing when Mal said solemnly, "You're accident-prone Dick, just stay away from my hotel."

The maitre 'd hurried over with a compliment bottle of dry white wine and asked could they kindly keep the noise down because not everyone else was drunk.

Dick's humiliation was complete when Pearl said, "Oh you're sweating darling, let me fix it," and dabbed at his forehead with her napkin." Dick glanced at Kade who was looking at him smiling, shaking her head like the embarrassed mommy of a naughty kid performing out of control.

"Drunk? I haven't had a drink since lunchtime, Mal sniffed, pouring the wine.

"I drank my share of a bottle with Dick and my sister in the nude on our ranch at lunchtime," Kade said.

"Oooh, I must have lunch with you guys sometime," Pearl said. "I had a brandy in the bath before I came here, my only drink today. We have been defamed by that outspoken maitre 'd," she sighed.

"Cheers guys, I'm really sorry," Dick said, holding up his glass and they clinked glasses.

"Dick relax," Mal said. "Pearl and I haven't had so much fun at dinner in years."

Conversations at the Savage Table settled down now that Dick had stabilized, the way the four were seated followed logic, leading to a cross-table split, Pearl asking Kade how many handbags did she own and if she thought the inflow of new immigrants was lifting the international awareness of the total population as well as the level of national culture and intelligence while Mal and Dick explored was there an international conspiracy within Governments to inhibit the development of more fuel efficient vehicles and would gladiatorial sport come back in favor now that sports administrators had unwisely taken total control of ball sports world-wide.

When their main course dishes arrived Pearl attempted to unify conversation and achieved limited success when she suggested Main Street sidewalks were overdue for an upgrade and as enthusiasm to keep that topic from advancing into street lighting improvement and more efficient disposal of storm water she stimulated table discussion by asking 'How Safe is Safe Sex?' Suddenly all four of them became self-declared authorities.

When liqueurs arrived with coffee, Dick raised the topic that was the purpose for him hosting the dinner. "Pearl and Mal, have you guys decided if you are interested in staying on in this town?"

Mal, grabbing at his shirtfront as if discovering his tie was missing and adopting the blank look of poker-faced negotiator was stymied when Pearl said simply, "Oh definitely."

"Mal?"

"Er Dick, what else is there to say?"

"Quite," Dick smiled. "I have some good news."

Three pairs of eyes fixed on him unwaveringly.

"When Kade took her mother and sister to Pryde City the other day to build a wardrobe of sweaters, impossibly tight jeans and provocatively short skirts for Carolyn for College, I flew off with a slide screen presentation of the sketches of the interior redesign of the Cattleman's and presented it to the operations committee of the board of Blue Horizon Group. I can tell you they were most impressed of the work of Kade and her project architect Rosalie Valdina."

"Why wasn't I at that meeting?" Kade said angrily. "And Rosalie!"

Mal cleared his throat and said he would have welcomed being included out of courtesy.

"I'm sure," Pearl hiccupped, "that Dick is about to explain those were not oversights."

"Quite right and thank you Pearl," Dick said. "On the day in question Kade, you were otherwise occupied in Pryde and Mal it was the day of your hotel's co-hosted golf tournament. Pearl perhaps you could have represented Mal but as you are all aware I didn't know you last Tuesday."

"Oh, poor boy. So you had to soldier on all by yourself."

"Thank you Pearl, expressed so succinctly."

"And now the entire project is screwed up and has to be smoothed out with cap-in-hand negotiations," Kade snorted. "You have taken no interest in the project."

"Oh that's so mean Kade. Just because I've given it as your project to lead and manage that doesn't mean I haven't kept an eye on things. I know intimately the roles and the work of the sixteen people you have in your architectural, design and interior décor project team although I hasten to say I have not reversed a single one of your decisions and that was why I was able to ask for a DVD of all sketches and was thoroughly briefed before I went to Blue Horizons and yes, I was unaccompanied and facing a possible hostile group. But I had called for a working lunch meeting an arrived with a carton on chilled top quality French champagne. The vice-president briefed his legal chief after seeing the slide show and later I made a couple of changes that they agreed to and we signed as it was too small a deal to go before the full board."

"What kind of deal?" Mal asked carefully.

"Several things," Dick smiled. "The committee agreed unanimously with the compromise exterior design that I had Rosalie work late into Monday night to design and have a CAD drawing done. That wasn't interference Kade because you hadn't asked her to do it. It was the compromise between the curtain smoked glass and bright red coated aluminum frame exterior you two favored and my all adobe and wood beam end traditional look I favored. Only when the committee voted unanimously in favor of the compromise version did I have a slight worry that you might alleged I was interfering."

Kade rolled her eyes and scowled and Pearl said to her, "I sympathize darling but we both know this is just how men are."

Mal prodded, "You said other things?"

"Oh yes Mal, I said Kade and I were adamant that as conditional of the five-year operating lease of the premises to Blue Horizon was you staying on as general manager with a $35,000 increase in salary."

"Ha, those tight-fisted HQ guys wouldn't agree to that."

"Correct Mal but they did settle at $30,000. Expect your new contract to arrive on Monday for signing. I received our copies of the property lease to Blue Horizon today together with it's standard agreement of operational procedure in leased premises and other documentation outlining property owner's obligations and shared responsibilities and similar crap. I have copies of the DVD and all documentation in the car for both you Mal and Kade. Kade, I see you are not smiling but you have to admit we had agreed leasing was my responsibility."

"This is magnificent Dick, well done. That 30G lift in salary pushes me up into the B-team level. Far out!"

"Oh, I did partially lose out on one thing. None of them liked the name The New Cattleman's Hotel. But they did accept my compromise to simply call it Cattleman's."

Kade burst into tears and Pearl was around to her quickly and led her off to the restroom.

"Oh dear," Mal laughed. "My first wife used to burst into tears like that for no reason, calling me the world's worst communicator."

"Oh what a shame," Dick said. "I've learned to pay attention to communication when it comes to women."

Mal looked at him, impressed.

* * *

Kade was quiet except when kissing the Hart's goodnight. Kade only offered a cheek to Mal and Dick was surprised then that's all he got from Pearl plus her idea of a bonus -- she whispered into his ear, "You pig, be nice to Kade and then elbow jolted him in the ribs. The only pleasure Dick received from that, and it wasn't much, was watching Pearl walking away from him rubbing that elbow.

Inside the apartment Dick prepared to be made to suffer, like being told to make her coffee and then to sleep in the spare room.

Wrong.

She went into the bedroom with her phone and slammed the door, leaving Dick to think she valued her phone more than him.

Ten minutes later Kade came out, red-eyed and said, "Bring me coffee. I'm packing and sleeping at mom's tonight and going with her to take Carolyn to college and mom and I will stay over a couple of nights."

"Fine. Oh, the relocation team arrives at noon tomorrow to begin our shift upstairs."

"So?"

"You'll be needed here."

"But I won't be, I've just told you where I'll be."

"But I don't know enough to decide where everything goes."

"Tough."

Dick knew it was time to suck up to her. "Aw come on Kade. Be fair, I overstepped the mark a little but probably achieved better than what we would have had you and Mal been with me pulling in different directions."

She bristled. "Dick, you can do everything without involving me so surely you can manage to relocate us without stuffing up."

"Oh, you said us. Does that mean you're coming back?"

"I'm thinking about it."

"Oh."

She stomped off, slamming the bedroom door.

Dick sauntered off to the guest bed, closed the door gently and looked at the bed with distaste. It was a guestroom bed, designed to be uncomfortable so that guests didn't overstay their welcome. He was barely settled when his phone rang.

"I hear you have been a naughty boy, again."

"Hi Carolyn."

"Darling, just slide your hand down over your naked body and gently grip that heat-seeking pussy missile of yours and..."

He snarled, "Carolyn, I'm not in the mood for phone sex, okay?" She began crying, called him a heartless sonofabitch and cut the call.

Five minutes later the so-called heartless sonofabitch called her back, apologized and wished her well at college. They talked for thirty minutes before she said her battery was running out. They said their goodbyes and he said he loved her and she cried, but not in the harsh way she'd done earlier. He lay back and reflected on that last call -- thirty minutes with Carolyn and not once had they talked about sex or even alluded to it. That would stand as a record for them.

Dick rescheduled his two afternoon meetings, bringing them forward for the morning and was back at the apartment building before the moving team arrived. The bossy woman in charge asked him where he wanted things and he mumbled he didn't really know. He heard the bitch mumble "Another useless male" and she said to him, "Get up to the next floor, stay out of the way and leave it to me. This will take us three hours."

And it did. They left at 3:15 after drinking the coffee and the steak sandwiches Dick had made for them. He tipped the bossy bitch a hundred because she'd been superb.

Despondent and feeling a real heel, Dick took a bottle of champagne up to the roof garden and by 4:15 was in bed. He awoke in the morning feeling great, and thought about ravishing a couple of babes but unfortunately none were on hand. The he had an amazing thought that almost gave him an erection: Fencing! He packed food, two bottles of wine in case he became really thirsty and took off.

After parking over the rotting underpants, Dick loaded the Bush Hog and drove up to the house site and thought there was still time to plant trees and have them settled before the summer heat arrived. His retired farmer consultant Austin had suggested he use Smith Horticulture for planting advice and they would buy in any trees and shrubs he wanted that they didn't stock, and that was the advantage of using a small firm. He called information for their number.

"Mrs Smith of Smith's."

"Er, Dick of D&K."

"Listen you jerk, if this is one of those sick phone calls, I'll..."

"No, Dick and Kade Ranch -- we've bought Mick Owens's place."

"Oh, welcome to the district. That barren piece of land needs considerable landscaping must I must say some genius attended to the bottom dam. What do you want?"

"Advice."

"You come here to the nursery for advice."

"Well, I'm different. I want on-site advice."

"Like when?"

"Now."

"Jesus, you have balls. It's spring, our busy season."

"One hour should do it. Send Mr Smith out and we can talk down at the dam oasis over a bottle of wine."

"He drinks beer."

"Then if you know anything about ranch house landscaping you come."

"Right, Betty is here today so I'll do that if there is phone signal coverage where we'll be. This is our busy season."

"Well, don't forget to bring you phone."

She snapped, "I beg your pardon."

"Are you sure you are the right person to be in business?"

"You asshole."

"Ah, I shouldn't have said that."

"You're damn right about that. I'm thinking of not coming."

"I'd say $30,000 of trees for starters, and then..."

She said she was on her way and knew where the old forestry access track was as she was a trail bike enthusiast.

Dick grinned and tried to imagine her as a sexy twenty-something but failed. Instead his mind attempted to match the bossy voice and came up with a fifty-year-old with balloons for breasts and arm muscles and shoulders that were larger than his. He opened the pipe gate out across the track, propping it open with a fence post and went back to try to get the 'feel' of the building site. He heard the roar of a trail bike and she shot through the gate and powered down the hill towards where he was standing and slid back under hard braking and stopped with the front wheel almost touching his boots.

"You're brave for a guy," she laughed through the dust guard over her mouth. She took off her helmet and shook curly brown hair free, her green eyes sizing him up.

"I thought you sounded under forty on the phone, a grumpy under forty."

"I pictured you as fifty with big tits," he said bravely.

"Leave my tits our of this or I'm out of here. I'm Therese Smith and my fortieth will be in a few months. I'm planning a big do so if you spend big bucks you'll be invited. You're that guy who's throwing big bucks to return the Cattleman's to us, aren't you?"

"Yeah, Dick Savage."

"I hear you've been through half of the town's finest women already including your fiancée's mother and her eighteen-year-old sister."

Dick grinned. "You have to be screwed up to believe rumors."

"Yeah, yeah," she laughed, removing her leather jacket to display nothing remarkable. "Good pick the Hog. Has Dottie been up here?"

Dick sensed that question was a trap so scratched an eyebrow and said with equal casualness, "What do you think?"

Therese laughed and asked what advice did he want.

He explained where they were standing would be the middle of the lounge at the windows.

"Great view," she said, glancing down the valley and out beyond the town. Then she turned after checking the position of the sun and studied the near hills and beyond to the distant mountains and pointing out in that direction and around to behind him said, "The main direction of our worst winter weather."

He nodded and jumped on to the Hog and she sat beside him. She tried out her phone and said nothing, confirming to him she had received a strong signal. They circled the staked makers of the outer fence around the two-acre block and he told her about the curved design of the barn-like garages. She looked at the few markers of the line of the inner fence and told him to push them ten feet farther in because people tended to under-estimate the spread of larger trees.

"A two-acre square you say?"

Dick nodded and said plus the access track from where she'd come down from the boundary gate.

"Look, you'll need to make that access track wide enough for an avenue of ornamental trees. Although few people will get to see it you'll see it every day -- you plant for you, not for your visitors. Do you understand?"