Distractions Ch. 07

"Truth."

"Are you sleeping with Jeremy?"

I couldn't help myself I started laughing. He grimaced at me, and I laughed harder. "No, definitely not. He's like a puppy I can't help but like." That was the answer I would allow myself to say. He didn't need to know the whole truth.

Again, I saw Gavin relax a little more. He nodded his head and took a shot not even looking were he was shooting. It seemed like the game was finished, but neither of us was willing to say that. It was easier to have this conversation with the game as motivation.

"Truth," he said again.

"You plan on having sex with that cashier?"

His brows wrinkled in confusion. "I saw you get her number in Victoria's Secret. You plan on sleeping with her?"

Gavin looked at me for a second like I was insane. He shook his head in what looked like disbelief and answered no. He went and sunk his first shot and missed the second. I didn't ask a question, I just got up and went. I needed time to gather my thoughts. He didn't say anything.

So, he didn't have sex with his secretary and he didn't plan on having sex with the cashier. What now? Does that change anything?

Still distracted, I missed my shot. My heart wasn't really in the game any more.

"Truth." I said as I drained my beer and opened another.

Was this beer three or four? I couldn't keep track anymore, but I knew that if I were going to ask the questions floating around in my head, I needed more liquid courage.

"Do you hate me?"

My eyes rocketed to Gavin's features. I guess I was trying to see what he was thinking. He looked at me with pleading eyes, and I thought about the question. Sure I was pissed at him, frustrated even, but I never entertained the idea of hating him, well at least not seriously.

I didn't hate him; I was more frustrated with myself. I knew the way he was with women, so I shouldn't care what he was doing, or with whom, but it was bothering me. It was my fault that I couldn't contain myself when I was around him. Gavin Preston evoked a roller coaster of emotions in me, and it was my fault that I got so riled up.

It sounds ridiculous, but I was more pissed at myself than him because he knew I was lying to him and myself. If I were a better liar, we wouldn't be in this position, whatever this position was.

"No." I watched shock register on his handsome feature. Obviously, he was expecting me to say something else. "I don't hate you. I'm more irritated with myself for not being able to stay steadfast in my resolve and prevent this from friendship from being ruined, which is something you obviously don't care about. Honestly, I'm not sure why I'm trying so hard."

Gavin looked stunned as he moved from his position in the corner to grab more beer. He gulped down half the can and lined up a shot. Now I knew he was missing on purpose because there was no way he couldn't have sunk the thirteen ball.

"Why are you doing this, Gavin?" I asked not even bothering to keep up the pretenses of playing truth or dare.

"Because you wont talk to me anymore," he said as he ran a shaky hand through his long brown locks. "You suddenly seem to think that I don't care or something. If this is the only way to get you to have a truthful conversation with me, then so be it."

I wasn't expecting that answer. I stood and took a shot because I was sick of standing still. Of course, I missed.

"Why are you doing this, Red?"

Honestly I didn't know. Any saner person would have left a long time ago, even if it meant they had to walk home. Any saner person wouldn't be pretending to play this stupid game. I didn't have an answer for him.

"I guess," I started, knowing I had to give him some kind of answer otherwise he'd think I was hiding something. "I guess to get some answers."

He nodded his head and drained the rest of his beer. The answer seemed to be enough for him. I watched as he rubbed both hands over his face, wiping away sweat that was beginning to form on his forehead.

When he pulled his hands away from his face, I saw a slight flush to his cheeks. I watched in horror as he lifted the hem of his shirt and pulled of his t-shirt, to stand on the other side of the pool table in just his jeans and sleeveless undershirt.

"All this beer is makin me hot," he answered my unasked question.

After a moment of silence, he picked up his stick and tapped the cue ball, giving me a chance to ask another question. He guessed right when he figured that I wouldn't ask my next question without prompting.

"How bad was it today?" I asked the question so softly, I didn't think he'd heard. I guess that's what I was silently wishing for.

I felt his light brown eyes bore into me, and I couldn't believe that question had slipped out of my mouth. "It was horrible wasn't it? I saw the look in your eyes when you shut the dressing room door."

Gavin gripped the edge of the table and I watched as the veins in his arms bulged.

"Is that what you think?" he asked incredulously as he stared down at the table.

"You didn't answer my question."

My heart was slamming against my ribcage, and I was afraid it would beat right out of my chest. Here it was, the entire reason for me flying of the handle today, and I was about to find out what he really thought about me.

Without another word, he turned from the pool table and walked back towards the couch. So, it was so horrible for him seeing me half naked, he couldn't even answer. Wow. Well, at least I had an answer, right? I was fighting the sob that was threatening to escape my throat.

I turned my back to him, so he wouldn't see me struggling so earnestly.

He walked up beside me and tossed a bag onto the pool table, sending a few balls scattering across the table. "That's what I thought of today," he said pointing to the bag.

Quickly, I wiped my eyes and turned to face him, questions written all over my face.

"Go ahead and open it."

With shaky hands, I reached for the pink and white Victoria's Secret bag, almost afraid of what I would find. I forgot to breathe as my fingers touched the lacy material hidden by the plastic. My fingers grasped the material and slowly slid it out of the bag.

"Oh," was the only sound that escaped my lips as I realized how wrong I'd been. He wasn't flirting with the woman at the counter; he was buying me the lacey boy-shorts and the red demi push up bra.

I saw dots dance in front of my eyes, and that's when I remembered I needed to breathe before I passed out.

"Oh," I said again still not sure what to say.

"What are you so afraid of?" he asked as he took another step closer to me. I could feel the heat radiating off his body. Suddenly I was really hot too.

"Obviously, what you're not afraid of – ruining this friendship," I said as I dropped the lace onto the pool table. My head was still spinning and I needed a minute to get myself together. The room began to tilt, and the heat radiating of Gavin's body seemed like too much. I felt like I was going to burn up inside.

I turned to walk away from him, but he grabbed my elbow and spun me back to him, searching my face for an explanation.

"Frankly," I continued as if I just hadn't tried to run from him. "I'm surprised that it hasn't been already. So would you please stop trying to chance it? Unless that's what you really want..." My voice trailed off and I looked up frantically.

I never thought about it like that before. If he wanted a way out of this friendship, this was a hell of a way of doing it. He could have just told me he didn't want me in his life anymore, he didn't need to do all of...this.

Gavin looked at me baffled, and I kept talking, rushing on, trying to fill the awkward silence that was falling around us.

"You only want me because I'm saying no to you. I know how you are." I didn't notice his fingers were pressing deeper into my elbow.

"I'll wait for you – till you're ready I'll wait for you." He said it so low, I wasn't sure if I heard him or not. It wasn't until I saw his eyes frantically searching my face for an answer that I realized he did say it out loud.

"You said that last night. What the fuck does that mean?"

Gavin pulled me closer to him so I could see frustration starting to mar his handsome features. He looked hurt.

"It means just what I said," he said grabbing me with his other arm and shaking me. "I'll wait for you, convince you if I have to." His eyes desperately probing my face. The waves of heat rolling of his body were making me delirious.

I couldn't help it, I laughed. I didn't mean to laugh at him, but it just came out. It came out in loud bursts, so forceful I couldn't breathe. After years of denying myself my feelings for him, it felt nearly impossible to just accept what he was saying.

"This will be over before you can say ruined friendship," I said between fits of laugher. Gavin's fingers tightened their hold on me. "Someone will come along and grab your attention like they always do, you just have to wait for that someone to distract you."

I tired to quiet my laugher as I stared into his face. He couldn't be serious. At least I hope he wasn't. The prospect of that was much more frightening than if he'd told me he didn't want me in his life. I couldn't face these feelings head on, so I laughed. It wasn't a strained laugh either; they were full blown belly laughs.

Gavin shook me again, hysteria beginning to take over his face as he searched mine for the meaning of my reaction.

"With strict avoidance," I continued on, "and sticking to only safe topics on the phone, we could eventually return to normal. Perhaps even venture out into public in a few months. Of course Brenden would suspect something, but I think this could work," I babbled on.

I was afraid if I stopped talking, the meaning of the heap of red lace on the pool table would make itself clear to me, and I didn't think I could handle that. This emotion, this feeling like all hope was lost, and I was the voice of reason was an emotion I could deal with. I couldn't deal with the weight of the emotion contained within the red lace.

"I dare you to kiss me," Gavin's words broke through my ramblings, and my laughter died in my throat.

"What?"

"I dare you. If you can kiss me and honestly tell you have no reaction and can't tell that I'm sincere, than we drop the subject forever." Gavin looked at me desperately now, and I could feel tiny beads of cold sweat beginning to break out across my forehead. I stared back at him in shock and it was his turn to ramble on.

"I remember how you kissed me. That night at the bonfire, that night in the bar when you saw Wilson. I remember it all. You can say whatever you want. You can lie to yourself and lie to me, but I know the truth. I know what your feeling. The way you kiss me tells me everything."

Well, when he put it like that, we really did kiss way more often than socially acceptable for best friends. Was that normal?

The cold sweat was turning into a full-blown panic attack. If I kissed him, my ruse would be over. If I kissed him, I wouldn't be able to pretend anymore, and he'd know that I was lying to him. If I kissed him, it would change everything. Change was supposed to be a good thing...right?

He took a confident step closer. He could see in indecision written on my face, my emotions so easily playing themselves out in my eyes.

"What are you, chicken?" I saw the same challenge in his eyes that I'd seen that night at the bonfire. The light brown of his eyes boring into mine, daring me to back down.

"No," I said defiantly lifting my chin up a notch.

He knew I'd never back down from a challenge, especially from him. He knew he had me.

"Then do it."

He stepped closer to me, pressing the hardness of his body against mine. I could feel my body trying to mold itself to his. Our breath mixed as our breathing became ragged. I could feel the tension coiled in his arms as my hands slid up the side of his body. This time it was his breath that caught in his throat as my hands continued their journey up his body.

They ran over the expanse of the muscles in his arms, up his tensed shoulders and into the curled hair waiting for my fingers at the nape of his neck. I smiled at the dark chocolate color his eyes had become, and he smiled back.

Slowly, as if waiting for the other shoe to drop, and my bubble to burst, I raised up onto my toes and closed the distance between our mouths.

_(*(*(-)*)*)_

Haha, (with an evil grin). I know, I know what everyone is thinking, and I'm sorry. I can understand your frustration and honestly I'm frustrated too. I would have kept going but I didn't want this chapter to get too long and have you loose interest. So see, I had your best interest at heart when I ended the chapter right when things were getting good.

Don't be too angry with me though, I submitted 7 and 8 within days of each other, so you should have your answers very soon.

=)