Do For Lust Won't Do For Luv Ch. 02

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She paused and said, "I... meant to tell you. The whole next day I was racked by quilt as I said and on the plane ride back home I just kept going over the whole thing in my head and wondered how I was going to tell you. As I'm sure you remember I was very aroused when I got home, we had almost nonstop sex that night and I didn't stop attacking you for a week. At that the time I explained that it was because I was so horny and that I wanted you. That was only two-thirds correct. I was s 'till horny, as I explained I was only partially sated by that young stud, which meant I was s 'till more horny then anytime I could remember. I also did want you. I will swear by anything you want me to that I wanted you. I forgot to mention it but on the trip there I daydreamed about you. I did lust after every male and I did flirt but more time was spent thinking about your body. Which was why my panties were completely soaked by the time I got to the hotel. I had expected to see a patch of wetness on my pants at anytime.

"On the trip back I thought of you. Some of the time I was surprised I didn't start balling right there on the plane. I had to hide the tears in my eyes. At the same time there were periods of time where I had wet panties again thinking of your body and what I wanted to do with it.

"The third reason I was so sexually aggressive was that I wanted to make up to you what I had done. You, of course, didn't know that, but that was in my mind. After we got home I tried to tell you, but the words wouldn't come out. I even called your name once and you looked at me but I just couldn't say the words. So I attacked you instead. Two days later I was determined to tell you but you were being so loving, telling me how you much you missed me, giving me flowers and a card, I just couldn't spoil that. One reason I could not was that it would hurt you."

Manty stopped walking and said in a hurt ironic tone, "That's what they all say."

"That's true but I will swear by anything you want that in my case I really was thinking that."

Manty had to think on what she had just said, for that phrase met something. Whenever Darlinia wanted to make sure everyone knew she was not lying she said that. If she wanted to make a promise that she would keep no matter what, she said that. He had seen it in action, she had taken great pains to fulfill promises even to her hurt, after she emphasized the promise with that phrase. Of course she usually didn't lie even when not saying that phrase but it emphasized her statements. She did not use it often.

She continued, "It was true that I was protecting myself also. I didn't want you to lose respect for me, but I did care about not hurting you."

He looked at her and said, "I would have forgiven you. It would have hurt of course, but I know I would have forgiven you."

"I know that," she said as she looked down again, tears forming in her eyes.

"I... it got easier and easier not telling you so eventually I just let the idea go. I never completely forgot about what I did even though I stopped thinking about it for periods of time."

He started to say something but she beat him to it, "No, I didn't daydream about him. Even on the plane trip back when I was s 'till so aroused. For a couple weeks afterward I did sometimes think about how he felt inside me, but I never fantasized about it and I never thought of him while we made love."

There was a pause than "What about you lover? When did you meet him?"

"I first met him close to a year and a half after the stud, which was almost twelve months ago."

"You said..."

"I know what I said. Our affair began ten months ago, but we had sex one time close to a year ago. It was just supposed to a one night stand. Or one night and one afternoon. As I said already I was on another business trip, this one was eight days long."

Manty nodded since he remembered that trip it had been one of the rare trips that lasted more then two days.

She continued as she looked at any place but his face, "That was during another bad time in my life, one you didn't seem to be aware of. I was depressed because of something going on at work and because of what was happening with my mother and my sister."

He nodded again, since he had known about her mother and sister even though he hadn't known about work.

"You had recently started to take me for granted. No flowers for a while, you were expecting me to do things for you around the house more and more, plus we hadn't had sex for two weeks. In the four days before that we had had only two quickies. I was at the beginning of my sexual peak and quickies just didn't fulfill my needs any more. Now you didn't notice I was mopping around the house.

"I went on the trip somewhat peeved at you, as the eight days went by I got more and more upset at you as well as more and more horny. Day seven also happened to be one week before my period. I had started the trip horny, but I became more so because of my period getting closer. At the same time I was PMSing which was why I got more angrier at you as time went by. During that month both, PMS and horniness seemed to hit me harder then usual.

"The first night after I took care of the business I was sent to do, I had dinner and went to my room to read or watch TV. However that night I started thinking about everything going on at work, my mother's physical problems and what was happening to my sister. I got depressed, it was worst then any time since all this stuff began. You called to make sure I got there OK, which I did appreciate, but you were not the help you usually were. Maybe because you didn't sense I was depressed or because I was thinking of you taking me for granted, I don't know but voice did not make me feel better. I eventually fell asleep and the next morning I was better, not emotionally normal, but not actually depressed either. That night I decided not to be alone in my room so after dinner I went to the hotel's lounge. I had some wine and just sat. A couple of people I knew came by and we chatted for a while. After they left a somewhat handsome man came along, but he soon saw I wasn't interested in being picked up and he left. And for your information I usually got hit on at these conventions. Sometimes only once and sometimes two or three times a night. I have always shown I am not interested even after that night with the young stud. There have been some handsome guys who seemed nice and who I was attracted to but I never considered going to bed with them for more then a few seconds. Until the third night of that conference that is.

After three classes of wine, drunk very slowly, and after a little bit more chatting with people I knew I went to bed. That evening had been a lot better, it was more relaxed and enjoyable. The next night I decided to repeat it. Again after dinner I went to the lounge and found a nice sized booth to sit in. I was hoping for more people I knew to come by and chat. A couple did, but they soon left. Half an hour later a stranger came by. He had drifted back and forth two or three times that evening and finally sat down. On the far side of the booth. He excused himself and said that most booths were full and he just wanted to talk. He had a class of wine also so I figured he was not a drunk or some other weirdo.

"We did just talk, that was when I found out that he was from around here, but was in that city for another convention at the same hotel. And I found out his name was Tony. Hmm, even as he sat down I was attracted to him. I am not sure why. He is not as handsome as some men, but as soon as he sat down I was drawn toward him. That night I made sure I didn't move any closer to him, however within half and hour of chatting he knew I was depressed. You had been living with me for four days and didn't even know it.

"After a while I said good night and left to go to bed. The next day was more of the same, with meetings I had to attend. I finally got to a late dinner and afterward I went straight to the lounge and had a class of wine. Tony showed up soon after I sat down. He again had a class of wine and again asked to sit. I said of course. I realized because of my attraction to him I should have said no, but I had no reason to, he hadn't made any passes, no sexual suggestions or anything else along those lines.

"We talked more and I got more horny. I s 'till could not figure out why. By the end of the night we were seating next to each other. When they say animal magnetism they're right. We seemed to just drift together. Once I had to get up and use the ladies room and when I got back I scooted closer. He did the same a bit later, however I am not sure how we got right next to each other. I could feel his warmth and drew me more. We touched hands that night a couple of times and it was like a light charge of electricity shot through my hand, right down to between my legs. I resisted the temptation to kiss him good night, however as he got up to leave I looked at his fly. He was hard, I almost gasped as I realized that he was as attracted to me as I was to him. Sudden desire shot through me as I realized that. I had been getting wet all evening, but that began a flood. After I got back to my room I masturbated. I didn't bother with warming myself up, I didn't need to. I just stuck two fingers of one hand in my tunnel and began thrusting them in and out fast, at the same time I used two fingers of my other hand to rub my clitoris. It didn't take long to have a climax. It was a four, and it helped some, but not enough. I had a some erotic dreams that night, most of which I could not recall enough of to do who they were about. I just knew they had been erotic. I was horny the next morning but managed to get through the day OK. That night after dinner I was calmer. I started feeling guilty because I knew it was Tony making me feel that way. When he came by that night I almost told him I didn't want to see him. I couldn't figure out how to though. I then almost stood up and left, I was very close to doing that but didn't. I wish I had.

"After he sat we just talked like we had been doing, again we moved closer. I am not sure how. I can recall sliding a little closer twice to hear him better but next thing I knew I was right next to him. My side was touching his."

Here she paused to look up to see what his reaction was. He was s 'till pacing, looking much like a lion in a cage that had decided to attack the first thing that came into its cage. He was again feeling the jealously, hurt, betrayal and shock. He couldn't stand to listen to her recitation of her cheating but at the same time he could not not listen to it either. This conflict clearly showed on his face.

She saw what she what she had done to him and began to cry. To really cry not just tears forming in her eyes. She had known he would be hurt if he discovered her affair but this pain went beyond what she had expected. He glanced at her and saw her tears running down her face and falling onto the sheet between her legs.

At that moment all he could think of was what was also between her legs on the sheet. She hadn't moved from that spot where he had fucked her, since she began her sorry tale. That meant that the gob made up of his sperm, her cum and her lover's sperm that had flowed out of her slit was s 'till there, right where her tears were falling. He thought it was very symbolic.

After a few seconds he said, "Please continue."

He said it in such an unemotional voice that she looked up sharply at him for his uncaring. She then realized why he was being so uncaring and just sniffed, stifled the tears and sighed.

"Soon...soon we were kissing. His tongue was in my mouth, mine was in his, I chewed on his lips. He whispered in my ear that he had masturbated the last evening after leaving me. He had been so worked up, he had done it again this morning. I said I had done it the night before hard and fast. Then I felt his hand on my leg. I had worn the shortest skirt I had taken. It ended a few inches above my knees. His hand was just above my knee and I knew it would be moving up in a second or two. I didn't care. I wanted to kiss him more. He slowly slide his hand up, he stopped suddenly and jerked his hand back out of the skirt once when I moved. I was only getting more comfortable. Which he must have realized because his hand was soon back. After a minute or two of slowly moving up he touched my panties, I noticed that his hand was shaking as if he was a nervous teen. He waited to see what I would do and when I just kissed even harder he moved his hand up further. I wanted him to touch me there. I was super wet already and already moving toward a climax. If just kissing him was doing that to me I wanted to see what him touching my love tunnel and clitoris would do."

She paused and in a guilty voice said, "I never once thought of you or the kids during this time."

She paused again sniffed and continued, "Soon he placed one finger on the outside of my love tunnel. As he did I jumped. He hastily pulled his hand back, but I had jumped for pleasure. I whispered in his ear to move it back. He did and I jumped again. His hand was just on the outside of my panties but I already was feeling like he was finger fucking me. I placed my hand on his hardness and he jumped. I stroked him and he groaned loudly. There was hardly any people in the lounge that night because of two meetings going on, but I s 'till decided we were making too much noise, I asked if we could go to his room. He just jumped up and said lets go.

"As soon as the door closed in his room, we were all over each other. Kissing and feeling each other through our clothes. I helped him take off my blouse and bra. He immediately began to suck on my nipples. As he did he kept complimenting them. Soon he reached his hand up my dress and found my joy button. After a few minutes of rubbing it he pulled his hand back down pushed two fingers into my slit. No hesitating or nervousness this time. The fingers slipped in easy and he started stroking them in and out fast. He tried to get to my G-spot, but the awkwardness of his arm under my dress would not allow him to. I didn't need his fingers there to excite me, however.

"Soon after I was naked and laying on the bed with my legs spread. I was ready for whatever he wanted. He knelt down at the edge of the bed and licked my slit. God, I was in heaven. I was so stirred up by his fingers inside and his mouth on my breasts I almost had an orgasm while standing, now after just five licks I had one. A good one, maybe a seven or an eight even. He kept licking and soon I stopped him and quickly moved around so I could suck him off. He tasted so good, his precum sent waves of pleasure through my mouth. When he cam, I almost cam again.

"Soon after we fucked and soon after we fucked again. I lost count of my orgasms, but one was a nine. Maybe a nine and a quarter. We fell asleep and woke earlier in the morning. We would have had sex again but we both had appointments, it was the last day of the conference after all. I hurried to my room and cleaned up. We didn't see each other until lunch. He found me and asked how I was. I said guilty but sated. He said he felt the same but he wanted one more round. So we skipped an afternoon meeting and fucked.

"And when I say we fucked I am not just using an obscene word I don't usually use. It describes best what we did. We did not make love. After we were done he gave me his business card with his home phone and we said bye. I said I don't plan on continuing this. He said he knew, but if I ever wanted to get in touch with him, I would have it.

"We were in my room this time, so he dressed and left. I cleaned up, changed and went to a last meeting. I felt guilty the whole meeting, I hardly took the notes I was supposed to. I couldn't believe I did it again. This time was different, for one thing it was a whole lot more enjoyable then last time, but s 'till, I almost cried three times during the meeting.

"As you know when I came home I attacked you. For five days I wouldn't let you alone, unless we with the kids.

He stopped his pacing, crossed his arms across his chest and said, "So all that time you did things to me and allowed me to do things to you because you felt guilty?"

"Noo, well... part way. I did miss you. I wanted you. Please believe me that I wanted your body next to mine, I needed your body next to mine. But yes some of that was because of guilt. I didn't complain about your fingers in my anus because of guilt. I...I... I almost told you three times."

"I would have forgiven you, just like I would have forgiven you for the first time."

Sniff, "I know, but I didn't want to hurt you, you are usually so good to me."

He gave her a look that said "Yeah, right."

She saw it and said, "Please believe me. I really didn't want to hurt you and, yes, I didn't want you to see me as a woman who couldn't control herself and have you wonder when I would do it again."

She sniffed some more and finally wiped her nose on a sheet. They would need cleaning anyway.

He said, "I know when you called him to began your affair."

She looked up at him in surprise and he continued, "Now that I know my suspicions have been proven correct, it was easy to figure out. It was the night of the special date I missed out on. That was when I knew you were having an affair."

She looked at him with puzzlement and he explained, "When you came home that night it was clear you had had sex. You were looking very satisfied and sated. I convinced myself it was just because you had succeeded in going out to dinner and the show by yourself. While denying me both the pleasure of seeing it and being with you."

She nodded and said, "I had planned that night for three months, I wanted badly to see the play and to have a nice relaxing dinner before hand. I had arranged for your parents to take the kids for two days so there would be no interruptions from them. However as the evening approached I began to think of it as something even more special. You had been taking me for granted, you hadn't bought me flowers or even a card for months. We were auguring more, you were working late and sometimes not even calling. Then you forgot my birthday. A week before the date you put me down at a party, you thought I didn't hear but I did. I thought the date would be a good relaxing romantic evening we could spend together.

"Then you forgot and worked late."

In a testy aspirated tone he said, "I did not forgot. We have discussed this before, more then once."

He paused for a moment to get himself under control and continued, "There was an emergency at work. I mean a once in a life time emergency. Some virus had gotten into the main computer and was wrecking files. Our back up computer half way across the country had just been destroyed by an earthquake. We hadn't had time to replace it yet. Everyone had to work late to try to save what we could or to redo certain new files from memory. We had just received some new important orders that had to be processed immediately. I called you on your cell phone, and when you didn't answer I left a text message."

"I never got that message, maybe you called the wrong number and left it with the wrong person, or it got swallowed up in Internet hyperspace as you say. I checked a number of times while I was waiting for you. That morning you promised you were going to be home at four-thirty that afternoon. No matter what, come hell or high water you would be there. At five I began to get worried, when you say something that way you always come though. I thought for sure you had had an accident. At five-forty-five I called your work. The person who answered the phone said nothing about an emergency, just that a special project had come up and you were busy working on it. I thanked the person nicely but I almost threw the phone across the room. You knew what this date meant to me but you got busy and forgot even after swearing you be home on time to get ready for an early dinner."