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Alena and Caleldir shared a lot in common with each other as the night wore on: neither of them wanted to be there, and both were finding each other's forced embrace exceedingly pleasurable. Also, as the night wore on, both of them found themselves increasingly detached from anything but the orgy. And Caleldir was having trouble staying awake.
Eventually, the sun came up, and Caleldir had collapsed. His time with the succubi was over, and he was not particularly desirous of a repeat. Dahlia by herself was tolerable enough, but bringing all her sisters into it, and then poor Alena's corruption... Well, Caleldir was not feeling great about his experiences that night.
But he was too exhausted to think about anything. He collapsed into his own bed with the drow, finally separated from the succubi.
- COMMENTS
Anonymousabout 4 years agoBut as you stated. I am not confusing undesirable fetishes with poor writing. I agree with little bird, I found it disturbing and uncomfortable. I ended up skipping over paragraphs. I kept waiting for Cal to be the master of Dahlia and force her to obey him. Dude really needs to start growing a spine that doesn't require his death.
In the critique department I would say you need to get a proofreader or do a better job of it. Over the course of the story there have been a multitude of errors, typos and autocorrect that don't make sense. Specifically the dozen or so times you have used message in place of massage. Yeah, great criticism anonymous guy. You wait 106 chapters to say anything. I know double d. I know.
The story is good. I have read 106 chapters so you must be doing something right.
Anonymousover 4 years agoThis is, admittedly, the first chapter of Drow's Dilemma I've read, but it is well written and quite entertaining to read.
Anonymousover 4 years agoI like the approach you made with Alena so far. Most nun corruptions end with the poor girl completely fallen, but her interaction with Cal is a good swerve on a common trope. Makes me kinda root for the two. <3.
P.S. good chapter overall. You got me hooker.
Anonymousover 4 years agoHey even if I don’t always like where the story is going or the specific things that are happening, it’s a story. Nobody is making me read it. And after over 100 episodes of this delightfully well thought out and interesting series, there’s bound to be one or two that don’t match up exactly with what I’d write.
That doesn’t mean it’s a waste. It’s definitely not a ‘waist’ either. It’s what you want to write. It shows that you put a lot of time, energy, and thought into the entire universe that these characters live in. I enjoy finding the newest episode because I don’t know what happens next! Great job and please keep it up!
