Dwelling in Desire Ch. 15

Dismal.

That was the best way to describe our ride home. Once the sexual high had worn off a bit, I'd transitioned from horny beyond belief to wondering just what the hell I'd done. What was I thinking?

It was difficult to tell what Beth was thinking—as if any man had any sense of what women were thinking. But it didn't take a genius to deduce what a dumbfuck I'd been. And how I might have hurt Beth in the process.

She hadn't seemed angry, during. At least not once things got really heated in the backseat. But at that point neither of us were really thinking with our heads.

Would she hate me for exerting my control over her in the way that I had? I might have abandoned my Catholic faith decades ago, but it was not the same for her. Beth obviously still held significant respect for the church, or she would not have interrupted a weekend such as this to attend services.

I needed to apologize.

Reaching over, I gently stroked her thigh, hoping she would understand.

My heart melted when I felt her tiny hand on mine. This girl was perfect. Beautiful, funny, honest, and innocent to a fault. I felt goodness and forgiveness radiate from her, even though I didn't deserve it.

I kept my hand on her thigh until we pulled into the garage. Shifting into park, I paused, knowing she wouldn't move until I allowed it.

"I'm sorry Bethany," I muttered. "I shouldn't have..."

"It's okay."

"No, I don't think it is," I asserted. "I wanted you so much that I didn't concern myself with whether I might be insulting you, or crossing a line."

Shaking my head, I continued, "You're just so beautifully submissive Beth, and I let it go to my head. I hope you'll forgive me."

I squeezed her thigh then, silently pleading, despite any attempt to keep my cool.

"I'm equally at fault," Beth whispered. "I could have told you no. Perhaps I should have."

"Perhaps," I agreed, "But I should've known better. I was an idiot, thinking with my dick and nothing more. I didn't realize how far I could push you without you pushing back."

"So I need to push back?"

I smiled weakly at her confusion. "Sweet Bethany, you shouldn't have to push back. As your Dom, and as your lover, I should know your limits."

"But how can you know my limits?" Beth reasoned. "We've only been together a couple of days."

"Still..." I shook my head, determined to punish myself.

"Curt, look at me."

I looked, trying to keep the anger from my face, as I didn't want her to think it was directed towards her.

"Curt, what we did...I...it was..."

I could think of a million things.

"Hot."

"Hot?" I laughed, thrown by her choice of words.

"Yes," she said as a smile tugged at her lips. "It was wrong, and we definitely can't make a habit of it, but, yeah. It was hot."

What the hell did I do to deserve this woman?

"Well, I still feel like I need to...I don't know, repent or something," I laughed, thoroughly enjoying her smirk as she shook her head at me.

"How about this," Beth offered, "You can make us some eggs while I go and take a nice hot shower. Alone."

"That seems a tad harsh."

"We had sex at my church."

"Fine," I growled. "Get to the shower then, little girl, before I change my mind."

---

I couldn't help but moan aloud as the water hit me. I'd been sticky all over, and tense from our passions in the back seat. Nothing could have been better than a hot shower. Except for maybe a hot shower with him.

Curt's punishment was as much a bummer for me as it was for him. But he needed absolution, and it really was best that I shower alone. Maybe I could actually get clean, and stay that way for a while. Plus, the water bill was already bound to be obscenely inflated from our prolonged aquatic...conversations.

"Aahhh," I hissed as I ran the soap over my breast. Looking down, I saw the marks from Curt's teeth, where his canines had broken skin. The marks weren't too bad, but they were enough to make my eyes go wide. I shivered as I flashed back to that moment in the car, when he'd affixed his mouth to my flesh, and given me what I so craved. What I didn't even know I craved...until him.

I shut the water off, determined not to prolong the shower any more than necessary. Drying myself quickly, I slipped back into Curt's robe before heading downstairs. The smell of first class cuisine filled the air, but it was different than before...

Emerging into the kitchen, I looked curiously at Curt, who had a pan sizzling with smoke and grease in his grip. It smelled like...steak.

"So I take it then that 'steak and eggs' is also a type of egg?"

"Hey Beautiful," he smiled that panty-dropping smile at me. I noticed his tie was gone, his top few buttons undone and his sleeves rolled up as he saw to the steaks. "Actually yes, it is, but this is not steak and eggs. This is my special omelette."

"Jeez Curt, I don't know why you restrict yourself to breakfast dishes. You obviously know how to cook, if not how to bake," I giggled.

"Baking is a girl thing," Curt declared as he sliced the meat.

"Well that's very open minded of you," I smirked.

"Right?"

"You're such a goof!"

"So I've been told," Curt grinned, popping a sliver of steak into his mouth. "Maybe I will spread my wings a bit, now that I have someone to impress."

"Yeah," I grinned. "You can do breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and I'll handle dessert."

"Or you could just be dessert," Curt winked suggestively.

"Even better. Less work for me," I replied cheekily.

"Oh I don't know about that baby," Curt snickered. "I think we can agree that our exchanges in the bedroom can be mutually exhausting."

"Mmm," I nodded, licking my lips from the mental image he'd painted.

"Come here," Curt ordered softly, as the mood went from light to serious in an instant.

I approached Curt with caution, but felt my entire body relax when he pulled me close, wrapping me in his warm embrace and rocking me softly.

"I love you Beth. I'm sorry."

I felt him squeeze me tighter as the final words escaped him.

"I know," I whispered before pulling back to look at him.

Curt refused to release me, but I managed to reach up and put my palm gently to his cheek as our eyes met.

"I love you Curt. It'll take a lot more than...that to make me stop loving you. In the future, just promise me 'no church sex', and I promise to say 'no' more often."

"Well don't go out of your way," Curt teased, as was his nature. "I love it when you say 'yes'."

"But I have to set boundaries," I insisted, relishing the familiar darkness simmering in his eyes as I sassed him. "I can't expect you to respect my limits if I've declared none."

"And yet you can't declare limits if you don't know what they are. And you can't know what they are if I don't educate you."

"You want to educate me, Mr. Donovan?"

"Yes," he growled, making me lick my lips. "But first, why don't we finish breakfast? At this rate, it'll be more like brunch."

"Fine by me," I nodded, stepping grudgingly away from him as he returned to the stove to finish the eggs and stir the meat with peppers and spices.

A handsome, sexy, sensitive, charming, funny, rich, well-endowed chef. Was all mine. And I all his.

Did life get any better? I felt certain that it did not. Well, maybe but for one little detail, and I refused to push him on it.

God had a plan for us. I'd never been surer of it than I was now.

---

"Uhmmuhhgud," Beth mumbled through a mouthful.

"Glad you like it," I grinned.

"Mmmm," she nodded, still chewing, a look of pure pleasure on her face.

My omelettes were pretty fucking awesome, I had to admit. Perhaps I should expand my horizons where cooking was concerned. If it put that look on her face, I definitely couldn't rule it out.

Thank Christ I'd thought to add steak to my cart yesterday.

She'd forgiven me. At least I felt that she had. But I had a long way to go before I forgave myself. The dumbfuck timing of my introduction of pain into our relationship was definitely not without consequences.

How would I revisit it without it being a source of discomfort? Emotional discomfort. Would it wreck our relationship?

Fucking idiot, I chastised myself over and over.

I'd play soft for a while. Maybe take a step back into vanilla. It wasn't as if I didn't enjoy being with Beth, regardless of the flavor of our lovemaking.

Only time would tell whether I could keep the demons at bay long enough to repair the damage I'd done.

"Ufff! I think I need a nap Curt," Beth slumped in her chair when she'd finished.

"Hmm, a nap doesn't sound half bad," I purred.

"Maybe I should nap in the guest room then," Beth didn't miss my tone, or the implications.

"Like hell," I growled.

Beth laughed, "You just need to promise to stay on your side of the bed."

"For how long?" I asked gruffly.

"Until I'm done napping," she answered simply.

"Those are rather strict conditions."

"Well, the kitchen is a bit of a mess. Perhaps you can busy yourself with that while I get some rest," she suggested with a sassy grin.

"Good point, Bethany."

Her expression sobered then, at the way I said her name. So she did feel it—the sexual trigger that had evolved over the course of our relationship. It affected her, just as surely as her pigtails affected me.

"Go on up and have your nap. I'll be there shortly."

We would see how much sleep she got, waiting for me.

Quite honestly, I was game for a nap. And it was probably best that she be asleep when I went in, so she didn't encourage me—not that I needed much encouragement where Beth was involved. But given the fragile state of things, I was probably less likely to interrupt her nap. Probably.

---

I surveyed the kitchen with mild satisfaction as I finished wiping down the counters. Cleaning up after breakfast had been more of an undertaking than expected, given my lack of attention to it the past couple days.

The pans were clean, the granite shone, and the sink was scrubbed and sanitized.

There was something about a freshly cleaned kitchen that felt...good. I wasn't exactly Suzy homemaker, but there was an undeniable the sense of pride and achievement a lemony-fresh kitchen instilled.

It'd taken at least thirty minutes, so Beth was likely asleep. My arousal had waned a bit, but I still worried that seeing her in my bed, asleep or not, would immediately rekindle my need to take her.

Beth needed rest. Hell, I needed rest. Perhaps I should just crash on the couch for a while. Leave her be.

But I couldn't. She belonged in my bed, and I with her.

Praying I could control myself, I headed upstairs to join her.

A tender smile spread on my face as I saw her lovely blonde hair and the collar of my blue robe peeking out from beneath the covers. She was turned away from me, for which I was grateful. Had I looked upon her soft eyelashes resting on her cheeks, her lush pink lips, her creamy complexion, the rise and fall of her glorious breasts, I might have been undone.

I shed my clothes before joining her under the covers, making sure to keep to my side of the bed, or what had now officially become my side. Cursing my stiffening cock, I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for the food coma to kick in.

---

"Aahh," I groaned as I awoke to the familiar sensation of a hot mouth wrapped around me.

All I could see was a mass beneath the covers, hovering over my cock.

My sweet Bethany sucked, cupping my balls in her tiny hand, adoringly, aggressively. It was clear that she was not finished with me, and any anger from this morning had long since dissipated.

"Aahh, Beth," I choked as she swallowed me. "Beth please..."

She released me and crawled up my body, only to emerge from the covers and render me speechless with her beautiful blue eyes.

"I love you Curt," she said solemnly, before kissing me full on the mouth.

Her kiss was thorough, aggressive, unyielding. A muffled moan escaped her as I wrapped my arms around her, pressing her breasts more firmly into me.

She fisted her hand in my hair and wrenched her lips free of mine, her eyes now sparkling with desire and longing.

"Take me," she ordered.

She didn't have to tell me twice.

I rolled us both so she lay beneath me, and gently kneed her legs apart. In an instant I was inside her, adopting a slow intimate rhythm as I lovingly kissed and nibbled at her neck, savoring her little mews. I wanted her writhing in desperate need before I surrendered.

"Mmmm Curt," Beth whimpered, clutching at my back.

"Sshh," I soothed as I continued the relaxed thrusts.

"Curt!"

"I know babygirl, just take it."

Beth shivered and nodded before she relaxed her legs, and went limp beneath me. Her body had surrendered, but her mouth was insistent as she licked my neck, whispering soft pleases periodically into my ear, making me shudder.

"Nnhh," I grunted as I struggled to maintain my slow pace. I knew it wouldn't be much longer until I needed release. But Christ, her soft begging, her body totally submissive and open to me, it was pleasure I simply couldn't resist.

"Mmhhmm, please," Beth whimpered as her pussy clutched at me in excitement, anticipation of what she knew was coming.

"Sshh, relax baby," I cooed.

"Yes Sir..."

And again she was open.

"Give me your mouth," I ordered.

Beth instantly obeyed, opening wide for me. I kissed her deeply, forcing her to take my tongue, and savored her squirming beneath me, eager and more desperate by the second.

She sucked at me, clung to me, milking my dick insistently as I neared my breaking point. I couldn't handle much more.

Releasing Bethany from our kiss, I savored her wail of disappointment as I withdrew, nearly pulling free of her clasping cunt. I waited for several moments as she squirmed and whined before I relented. I penetrated her, all the way.

"Aahh," she gasped, her eyes going wide, her nails digging into my sides.

I pulled out again, and thrust deep, bumping her cervix. I would plant my seed there. Soon.

Again I pulled back, nearly coming free of her, again and again. I taunted her until she practically growled at me.

"I'm close babygirl, are you ready?"

"Please Curt, just fuck me!" she threw her head from side to side in frustration.

I chuckled at her desperation as I continued my lazy thrusts.

Leaning in close, I whispered into her ear.

"I'm going to come inside of you Bethany...nothing between us...nothing."

"Aahhh yess!" she hissed, wrapping her legs around me.

"I'm going to spray my cum inside you, deep in your cunt..."

"Aaahhh! Aahh, please!"

"Soon, you'll be pregnant Bethany. Very soon..." I crooned, nearly pushing myself over the edge with my words.

"Nnnaahh!!" she screamed, her pussy contracting over me as she came.

"Yeeesss," I hissed, as I gave in and began a furious pace.

The sound of her pussy rang in my ears, the smell of her enflaming me, making me wild. The image of her firmly rounded belly so vivid, so close...

"My baby...aaahhh...you'll have my bbaby...nnhhh..." I growled through clenched teeth as I let instinct take over.

Raw. Animal. Instinct.

I let her have it, hard and fast, pounding and raging into her like I never would again. Tingling sensation buzzed through my ears, down to my toes and back, til it finally rested in my groin, and I knew it was time.

"Now Bethany, milk my cock! Now!" I roared as I delivered a final mighty thrust.

"Aaahhh!!" Beth screamed, her pussy clamping down tight upon me, making my eyes roll back as I pulsed.

I struggled for breath as I fired off once, twice, three times, again and again as she whimpered and mewed. I trembled, breathing heavily into her neck.

When the aftershocks had abated, I rolled, pulling her with me. My cock was still wedged in her, preventing my cum from seeping out for the moment.

I couldn't believe it—we'd more or less just had vanilla sex, and I was still floating on cloud nine.

Nothing. Nothing would ever be this good.

---

Sweet heavens, his words, his...everything.

I was totally limp, useless, yet filled with a new sort of energy. A determination to love Curt. To please him, and have his babies.

Perhaps it was the sex high that was still very much present in the air as we lay side by side. Perhaps the sex was responsible for my sudden transformation.

My career, the whole foundation of our crossing paths, seemed but a distant memory. I wasn't ready to let it go, but I wasn't willing to compromise on my relationship with Curt either. My love for him was so thick, it seemed to drown my concern for anything else. But again, the sex. The hormones—they had to be impacting my judgment.

Maybe tomorrow, when he went back to work, I would be able to think straight.

Wait a second...

Did I need to work? Did I need to, the way I thought I did? It was true that I had bills to pay—bills I would never dream of passing on to Curt, but, he obviously wanted me here. For a while, if not forever.

Did he want me to...move in? That would certainly help me out financially.

It was still so fucking surreal. He wanted me, to keep, and to have his baby.

Would he want to marry me?

I felt like such a silly schoolgirl thinking of such things. Curt was so...out of this world. It didn't seem like general social convention should apply to him. Just because he was trying to get me pregnant didn't mean he wanted to marry me, or that he needed to marry me. Heck, people had babies out of wedlock all the time, with no particular rush to make things legal.

It was my roots, and my faith, which were nagging at me. It wasn't Curt's fault that I had these hang-ups, and I refused to let them burden him, the way I feared they would burden me eventually, when my stomach grew. When I could no longer conceal the repercussions from the outside world.

What would my parents think of me? And my church?

"What is it?" came a gruff voice.

"Huh?"

"Far too many thoughts are running around in that brain of yours Bethany," Curt growled. "Tell me."

"I just..."

Curt waited patiently for me to continue, but I just couldn't. I didn't want to burden him.

"Nothing."

"Nothing hmm?" Curt purred. "I think we both know that's a huge load of horse shit, Beth. But I haven't the energy right now to punish you for lying. So what do you say we have a bath?"

"Mmm, that sounds amazing, but I just had a shower," I mused.

"What? Did I not do a good enough job dirtying you up?" Curt chuckled as he rolled toward me and began kissing my shoulder, licking along my collarbone and downward.

"Ahh," I arched and tensed as he neared the mark on my breast.

"Is it sore?"

"Sore to the touch, yes," I admitted.

"I'm..." Curt began, before shaking his head.

"What?"

"I was gonna say I'm sorry for marking you, but that would be a lie. A fucking monster of a lie."

"You don't have to be sorry Curt. I'm not," I giggled. "It was amazing."

"Yes."

A few moments passed in silence, and he resumed kissing over my breasts, careful to avoid the red marks.

"I'll treat it after our bath."

I nodded, and shivered as he captured my nipple between his teeth and gently nibbled.

Aaahh...

Soft nibble, tender lick. Soft nibble, tender lick. Nibble, tug, nibble, tug...

I couldn't help but squirm as he teased me, the puddle of his sperm under my ass beginning to grow warm again as it mingled with my fresh juices. Every time his teeth put just a little extra pressure on my nipple, I felt shocks race through me, each terminating between my legs, again and again.

"My sweet Bethany," he whispered into my flesh, "I can't wait to taste sweet milk from your breasts."