E-Beth Ch. 04

But all I could think of was Stella. She'd been my best friend for years, and had even become my lover. But now it felt like we were breaking up. And even though I wanted to believe that we all cared enough about each other to get through anything, I sincerely worried if our friendship would ever recover.

****

*-- JUNE 2007 --*

It was nearing 6pm when Teddy stopped by my office to pick me up. It was just an ordinary weeknight, but my boyfriend and I had made plans to go to Primavera's for dinner and then back to my place for sex.

Of course, I had completely lost track of the time. Radinsky was an absolute moron and had refused to even consider the possibility that triglycerides would work just fine as a bonding agent for a new product. They may have been cheap and common, but they worked just fine. But Radinsky claimed that such a solution wouldn't be "elegant".

I muttered under my breath how annoyed I was with Alfred for sticking me on this project and didn't even notice someone had come into my office until I felt Teddy's hands on my neck. I stiffened in momentary surprise, but he was already stroking and soothing my muscles, causing me to let my head dip down as the pleasant sensations worked their way up my spine.

"Mmm... That feels great..." I moaned with my eyes closed.

"I should do it more often then," Teddy chuckled.

"I am the luckiest girl on Earth," I replied with a smile, sighing happily as Teddy continued his neck massage.

Just then, I saw a figure stand up and exit the cubicle just outside my office. Stella's blonde hair swished as she turned around and caught sight of us through my open door. She gave us a little smile before turning and walking away quickly, perhaps heading to the copy machine or the coffee break room or whatever.

At the same time, I felt Teddy's fingers tighten ever so noticeably against my neck. The sudden pressure was almost painful, and I tensed my shoulder muscles in response.

It was only for a moment. Teddy quickly relaxed and went back to stroking my neck and shoulders, resuming his massage. But it was enough.

Reaching a hand back, I covered one of Teddy's in a gesture for him to stop. He did, and I tilted my head back so I could look at my boyfriend. And in a soft voice, I asked, "You miss her, don't you?"

Teddy pursed his lips, momentarily thinking of some dismissive comment. But after another beat, he just shrugged and replied, "Of course." His eyebrows popped and then he quickly added, "As a friend."

I shrugged at his qualification. And then looking back to the open doorway, I thought of all the things we used to do together. Even though I'd had my boyfriend all to myself, the past month hadn't been easy for me. Not only did I miss the closeness I'd once shared with my best friend, but I really missed having a girl in bed with us, too. "I'll bet you miss that tight pussy," I commented quietly.

Teddy sighed and patted my shoulders. "You're all the woman I need. You know that."

I exhaled, "I know." And I probably was. I was as horny as a teenaged boy, and Teddy never complained about getting enough. And whenever I saw Teddy and Stella talking together, it really seemed that they missed the closeness of their friendship, not the sex.

*But *I* miss her tight pussy, too.*

"You miss her too, don't you?" Teddy's voice came out of nowhere, echoing my thoughts.

I exhaled slowly and then shrugged. "I see her all the time. We still go out to Monahan's most Fridays."

"But it's not the same." Teddy sighed. "You two aren't the friends you used to be. Everyone can tell. You know most people think that *I* came between you two? Audrey cornered me yesterday and practically accused me of trying to seduce Stella; and that THAT'S why everything's been so awkward between the three of us."

"What?" I sat up straight and turned around in my seat.

Teddy nodded, and then he looked out the open door with some longing in his eyes. I did too. I knew my boyfriend loved me, and only me, at least romantically. But there was still a big hole in his heart where Stella used to be. And to be honest, there was a hole in my heart, too. Even though Stella stepping back from me and Teddy was supposed to help my relationship with my boyfriend grow, it felt like we'd just been treading water ever since, making no progress forward.

This was stupid. I missed Stella. Teddy missed Stella. And she missed us. It was like she was the glue that held us together, and without her, even love wasn't enough for Teddy and me. The three of us HAD to figure out how to work this out.

If only I knew how.

Teddy took a deep breath first, rubbing my back before standing up straight and then reaching a hand down to me. "Come on, sweetie. Let's get to dinner. We'll gorge ourselves on heavenly tapas, drink some nice wine, and then cuddle on your couch watching reruns. Okay?"

I put my hand into Teddy's and let him pull me up. And then reaching up to cup both of his cheeks, I kissed him softly, with all the tenderness and affection I felt for him inside. After years of dating jerks, I had finally found a quality man I could depend on. I had finally found someone who showed me loyalty and devotion equal to my own. And yet, I was thinking of doing something that could potentially lead me to lose him.

But not tonight. Tonight, he was all mine. So I pulled away from our kiss, looked my boyfriend in his clear blue-gray eyes, and answered, "Okay. Let's go."

****

I stopped by Stella's cube and knocked against the plastic of a side wall. "C'mon, honey. Time to go."

The pretty blonde, less bubbly than usual for the past month, looked up at me and sighed. "Oh, uh, y'know I think I'm just going to skip this week. I'm absolutely buried and I wanna get this done before the weekend."

"This isn't a request," I said firmly with raised eyebrows. "It's 5pm on a Friday, and you're coming with us."

Stella smiled wanly but shook her head. "No, really. I'm fine."

I grinned as I simply stepped into her cubicle, grabbed the back of her desk chair, and wheeled her away from her keyboard. "We're going. And that's it. You very much look like you need a Vodka Cranberry, and you're gonna get one."

Stella exhaled slowly, then looked up at me with a defeated expression. But at the last, she smiled and nodded. "Fine." And she reached out to grab her purse.

A few minutes later, the two of us strolled into Monahan's. Audrey and Paula were already waiting for us at our usual table. And as soon as we sat down, our usual waiter came by to grab our orders. "The usual?" he asked me and Stella.

"Sure." I nodded and looked to Stella, who nodded as well.

I sighed and looked at Audrey. "Are we THAT predictable?" I jerked a thumb at the departing waiter. "He's only been here what, six weeks? And he's already figured out our 'usual'?"

Audrey shrugged. "We're getting old and boring."

"Speak for yourself," Paula said huffily, but with a playful smile on her face. "Some of us are still having new and fun adventures."

"Oh, really?" Audrey chuckled. "And just what new adventure did you have this week?"

"Nuh-uh," I interrupted, eyeing Paula carefully. "I know that look. What new *guy* did you meet this week?"

Paula's smug grin immediately vanished and she carefully studied the bottom of her glass. "Oh, nobody."

Stella was on top of things. "*Paula*..." she drawled. "Don't hold out on us."

Paula's eyes darted to Stella, and then to me, and then she frowned and blushed. "I... uh... oh... I don't know if I should..."

"*Paula!*" Audrey whined. "No secrets, remember? Spill it."

Paula looked straight at me. She sighed and then gave me an apologetic look before gathering herself and saying, "Grant asked me out."

"Grant?" Stella sputtered. "As in... *Grant?*"

Paula looked ashamed. "I'm meeting him at Torreta's at eight. I'm sorry, I know I probably should have told you first, but this is the first time I've seen you and I figured that things have been going so well with you and Teddy that you wouldn't mi-"

"It's fine," I cut her off, holding a hand up. "It's fine, really."

"You sure?" Paula bit her lower lip, looking nervous. "Because I don't want things to be all weird between us. Not like you and..." her voice died out as she glanced at Stella. Then Paula's eyes tracked back to me and she finished lamely, "Uh, I mean, if you're not okay with this, then I can still call-"

"It's fine," I cut her off again. "Nothing ever happened. Grant wasn't right for me. I found Teddy. Everything's cool." I took a deep breath. "Grant's a charming guy. Just... be careful with him, okay?"

Paula nodded. "I know. I always am."

"For God's sake," Audrey sighed. "Don't sleep with him on the first date."

"I only did that once!" Paula complained. Then she rolled her eyes and flopped against the booth backrest huffily. That just got the other three of us to giggle in amusement; and after a couple of seconds, Paula joined in as well.

"So anyways," Paula continued. "I'll have to leave soon to get ready."

Everyone nodded, and then Stella added quietly. "Me, too."

Audrey was the first to raise an eyebrow. "What? Do *you* have a hot date, too?"

Stella pinched her lips, looking at the table for a moment before glancing over at me and nodding. "Yeah. I do." That heartbroken look of longing in Stella's eyes was back.

"Well spill it!" Audrey insisted. "Who's the guy?"

"Yeah!" Paula chimed in.

I just looked at Stella curiously.

Stella glanced at the girls and shrugged. "Guy I met at the gym, actually. He's nice. Little overmuscled and stocky for my taste, but he seems really sweet. He's been flirting with me for months now, and I guess I decided to finally give him a chance."

"'Bout time, girlfriend," Paula reached over and slapped Stella's hand. "You and Chuck broke up what, four months ago?"

"Yeah..." Stella sighed, once again staring right at me with a sad look in her eyes. "I guess it's time that I moved on."

****

After the one round, with two of our number leaving early to prep for dates, we decided to call it a night. We collectively wished Paula and Stella good luck on their dates. But after Paula and Audrey went in one direction, I followed Stella to her car. "You really have a date tonight?" I asked curiously.

Stella furrowed her eyebrows and looked at me like I was crazy. "Yeah," she chuckled. "You think I just made it all up?"

"No, no, of course not. But..." I trailed off, not sure where I was going with that.

"But what?"

My shoulders slumped. As much as Teddy and I loved each other, our relationship had slowly been fraying over the past month. We still clearly cared about each other, but we both had missed the spark and presence that Stella brought to our relationship. Her absence was just a downer from which we hadn't been able to recover. And just last night I'd decided that I wanted to find a way to get her back.

So I took a deep breath, gave my best friend an honest look, and I said, "We miss you, Stella. Both me and Teddy. We miss hanging out with you. We miss having you closely in our lives. Frankly, we want you back."

Stella stared at me, the haunted look back in her eyes. She shook her head in the negative and replied wearily, "I told you. I would never intentionally do anything to interfere in your relationship."

"I know! I trust you. I trust that you wouldn't try to steal him from me. And that's why we want this. We want to go back to the way things were."

Stella looked at me sadly. "The way things were? I was hurt, and lonely, and vulnerable. I'd broken up with my long-term boyfriend and I needed some affection and love. I got that with you guys. It was great while it lasted. But now?" Stella shrugged. "I'd never be anything more than a third wheel to you guys. You're the couple in love. I'm just the extra pussy. Are you really asking me to go back to that?"

"No, of course not!" I blinked in surprise. "That's not the way it would be!" I said defensively.

"And how would it be?"

"I don't know! I just... we miss you Stella. We BOTH miss you."

"And I miss you both, too. But that's a dead-end relationship for me." The pretty blonde sighed. And then she picked her head up and fixed me with a piercing green gaze. "You often talked about how close you were to your college friends, David and Amber. You were sleeping with the both of them, weren't you?"

I blinked rapidly. "Uh, yeah."

"Do they love you?"

"Yes."

"But do you have a future with them? Did being with them fulfill you? Last you told me, they got married and have a baby on the way. They're living their lives and moving on. But could they take you with them?"

I bit my lip and my shoulders sagged even more. "No," I admitted.

"Of course not. You had to move on, to find your own relationship. And you've done that. You've got Teddy. Now I don't know if the two of you will last forever. You're both young and it's really only been five months that you've *actually* been together. But there's promise there. There's hope there. You have a potential future together."

I just looked down. I had no answer to that.

Stella sighed and then collected herself once again. "I've got to do the same. I've got to find my own way. Maybe Nicolas, this guy from the gym, is the one for me. Maybe not. Either way, I owe it to myself to find out."

I exhaled slowly. And in resignation, I nodded. "I understand."

Stella gave me a wistful smile, and then she stepped forward and hugged me. "I love you, E-Beth. I love Teddy, too. I learned so much about myself while I was with you. But I need to move on with my own life."

I nodded and hugged her back, softly patting her shoulder.

Eventually, we broke apart. I squeezed her one more time and then held Stella at arm's length. "Good luck tonight. I hope it works out for you."

Stella shrugged, but gave me a soft smile. "Me, too."

"And however this works out, don't be a stranger with me and Teddy, okay? We're all best friends. We really should act like it a bit more. I have no fear of you and him, so stop trying to be such a 'good girl' by keeping your distance, okay?"

Stella blushed and bent her head. But she nodded and grinned. "Okay."

I turned to leave, but just before I did, Stella tugged on my hand, pulling me to her. And grabbing my cheeks, she leaned forward and softly kissed me.

It was beautiful.

And it was over just as suddenly as it had started. There was a little smile on Stella's face. And with the cute giggle I hadn't heard out of her in a full month, she turned back to her car and unlocked it.

Maybe there was some hope yet.

****

*-- JULY 2007 --*

"So I hear congratulations are in order," Audrey beamed over at Teddy. "Got a promotion?"

My boyfriend squeezed my hand on top of the table and blushed. I squeezed back, and Stella even reached across and patted Teddy's hand from the other side of the table, looking almost as proud of him as I was. The girls, my boyfriend, and I were at Monahan's, just enjoying a few drinks on a Friday night before heading our separate ways for the weekend. Well, most of us; Paula had called in sick and wasn't at work today.

"It's no big deal," Teddy replied modestly.

I rolled my eyes. "He's a junior researcher," I pointed out. "They more than doubled his salary, it's full-time, and he's getting a cubicle out in the farm with the rest of us. It IS a big deal."

Audrey fixed me with a raised eyebrow. "You pull any strings for this?"

I held my hands up immediately. "No-no. It was all him."

Stella nodded. "I was there when this coterie of researchers all went to Alfred's office. Apparently, Teddy had been giving them advice whenever they came to the stockroom. So after realizing he had such a good chemistry background, they banded together and ordered Alfred to hire him. Even Radinsky vouched for him."

Teddy blushed again, and I was positively fawning over my man by now.

"So you got a promotion. Well you know what this means," Audrey drawled.

"What?" Teddy took the bait.

Audrey grinned. "First round is on *you*."

We all got a laugh out of that. But then Audrey switched gears to rather unsubtly pry into Stella's dating life, asking about this Nicolas guy from the gym she'd been seeing for the past month-and-a-half. And just when Stella was about to try and deflect Audrey's more probing questions, a blonde hurricane stormed into the bar.

"Fucking piece of shit ASSHOLE!"

We all turned to look, and Stella was the first to exclaim, "Paula?"

The buxom bottle-blonde stomped over to our table, a look of pure rage etched across her face. She promptly went over to the table next to us, next to me, really. And turning straight to me, she practically snarled, "What did Grant tell you about his ex-fiancée and all that?"

"Wh- what? Grant?" I blinked, still caught off-guard.

"Yes, Grant! Who else?" Paula barked shrilly. "Our first date, he was so smooth and charming and chivalrous. Oh, he's *really* good that one. I might've slept with him on that first date if it wasn't for Audrey's nagging voice in the back of my head scolding me for even thinking about it. But then our second date, he was telling me this sweetly romantic story about how he met Maggie in a bar at Mardi Gras. How she gave him a fake name, of course, but how things had progressed and developed and turned into something pure. Now I know it's not supposed to be a good thing whenever a guy talks about an ex, but he continued on and told me about how they were engaged and all ready to get married. He started choking up a bit and he looked like such a wounded animal that I couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. Can you imagine me being maternal and comforting? *Me?* I couldn't, but there I was, wanting desperately to comfort him. He told me about how he came home one day to find his fiancée banging his *brother*. And he talked about how he'd had to just pick up and move away to try and recover the pieces of his heart."

I was nodding along. It was a sweet, if sad, story. That had been the night that I nearly slept with him, only to decide at the very last moment that I wasn't ready for intimacy just yet. Grant had promptly disappeared on me for the next week or so, before I bumped into him again at the Holiday Party and belatedly found out he'd called off our budding relationship.

"It was all bullshit!" Paula screeched. "He just said that to get me to sleep with him!"

"Wait, WHAT?" My eyes flew WIDE open.

"Oh, he met Maggie at Mardi Gras. And they did get engaged. But what he *didn't* tell me was that HE'S A LYING, CHEATING BASTARD!" Paula screamed that last part loud enough for the entire bar to hear.

"Hey, hey," Audrey was quickly on her feet, hovering over Paula and trying to get our friend to calm down. "What happened?"

Paula buried her face in her hands. "Grant got this impulsive idea to run away for the weekend. You know, a spontaneous stay-cation, just the two of us here in the city. We'd go out to nice restaurants and get spa treatments and maybe see a show. It sounded so exciting and wonderful so I called in sick and we left. We got this hotel room downtown and promptly started screwing like bunnies. But about an hour ago, Grant got this call on his cell phone. His eyes went wide and he tried to turn away from me as he chatted with whoever, mumbling angrily about how he'd call them back later and being all secretive and stuff. Now I've been around guys that were cheating on me, and I know those kinds of looks and the way they try to hide things. I suspected that it was some other girl that Grant was banging, and he realized I was giving him some cold looks. So he kind of retreated into the bathroom to compose himself or something. But he left his cell phone in the room, so I picked it up and called back the last received number."