E-Written Jack The Giant Killer

The reason for the season chapter 2 : Punished with marriage

I have dovetail parts of two related fairy tales back together, Jack the giant killer and Culhwch ac Olwen from the Llyfr Coch Hergest.

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Chapbooks starting selling in the late 1500s. They were cheap booklets printed on a single sheet of paper that would be folded into pages. Using simple words and crude woodcut prints they told stories at a time when roughly 30% of the population was literate. The stories they told tended to be simple, about one level above Dick and Jane in terms of complexity and reading comprehension.

Jack the giant killer and Jack and bean stalk were popular chapbook stories. They had their roots in older King Arthur tales.

The King Arthur myths and legends themselves could be split into three board categories.

The first category would be the stories that most Americans have some passing familiarity with. These were the stories of chivalric romance, Sir Lancelot, and Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. They tended to be written in the 1400s, later modified by Victorian era views.

Then there's the second category of stories. They could be summed up as a grim dark game of thrones written by two guys named Edge Lord and Neckbeard. Think Monty Python's Holy Grail rewritten by Rod Zombie and directed by Quentin Tarantino, from a studio that kept demanding more incest and cannibalism. They tended to be from around 10th century and the Victorians and others disappeared them, soviet style, from the Disneyfied version of the myths most Americans know and love.

The last category would be the origin stories and source material of the first two categories. Depending on which dissertation by a PhD candidate you believe, either some or nearly all of the King Arthur myths have their origins in Pagan beliefs of the pre-christian British Isles and Norse settled lands. The ancient Greeks had demigods like Hercules, a mythical figure who was the son of a god and the legendary founder or protector of many city states. The ancient people of the British Isles had similar demigods, who would become the early knights of the round table.

In this way, Jack and bean stalk is directly related to the Norse Yggdrasill, the world tree those branches extended into the land of giants as well as Asgard and Niflheim. But you clicked on this to read a sex story, not a review of stories like the epic Kalevala poems and the English language works they have inspired.

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***Planet New Assuwa- hills outside of Island town of Hogshead; 10am***

The woman was not topless, but her large tanned breasts were hanging out of the front of her formal robes in the style of a Minoan priestess. On her head was the owl crown of the Earth goddess. A golden colored projecting looped cord lay between her breasts. She carried a scepter of divine authority in the shape of a snake in her hand. Her face was painted pure white, with black outlines around her eyes, almost like Dia de los Muertos facepaint I thought.

All of us stood on a hillside outside of town near a large black obelisk. About 500 naked, freshly-fucked MILFs in one group, a large group of teenaged boys and young men who had been captured and fucked by the MILFs in another, the largest group was thousands of young people who had volunteered as tribute. Even here I could smell the smoke from the buildings set on fire during this morning's riot. Some of the fires still burned out of control in structures outside of town. Most of the flying sleds were here with almost all the flying rain deer. The naked homeless guy still had one of the sleds and some flying deer.

"Let me start by explaining the ancient traditions of our island." The priestess said, her voice was stern and deeper than I would have expected. "Long ago, if a woman's husband died, then on the summer or winter solstice, and ONLY those two days, she could take a second, junior husband. Symbolical this day is a marriage between not just the Sun father and Earth mother..."

"Blessed are the Earth and Sun." the guards and some followers chanted.

"but also the forces of life and death. It is a day of rebirth and new beginnings." The priestess continued. "The bachelorette party to the Earth Goddess was a time for mothers to reflect. The younger men they married were almost always young men captured from other city states or tribes in battle. All benefited. The woman received a new junior-husband, who in time would become a husband-protector and a father figure to her kids. The young man received a place in our society higher than a slave, and also an experienced life partner. And our island benefited by having fit young men protecting it instead of a group of hostile slaves ready to overthrow us at any moment. It is almost always better to marry off such men instead of executing them on the hill side."

"What about us, we're only 18 and don't have any kids. We've come to volunteer as tribute." One of the young women in a toga cried, hot tears streamed down her face.

"You can go back into town as soon as the fires are out." One of the guards told her. "We pride ourselves on keeping everyone safe when their fucking our minotaurs. We don't want anyone getting hurt. You will be allowed in the maze as soon as we get rid of that flying castle hovering over it."

"See, what is suppose to happen is a coming of age quest. Young people come here on a magically talking, giant bird or sail here as part of an epic quest lasting months, to find their place in the world." The priestess said as she addressed the horny moms. "What's not suppose to happen is a bunch of horny moms from the mainland cities leave their kids with their husbands for the weekend, take an hour long flight over to the island on some magic sled and have a girls weekend where they get drunk on wine with their friends or messed up on mescaline and peyote from that stupid homeless wizard who lives down by the river. Then run naked through the streets with huge nets, rando mooing, and fucking every man they see. And finally, when law enforcement tries to stop them, setting the town on fire and claim it is all cool because they are with the bachelorette party to the Earth goddess. Half of you don't even worship the Earth goddess."

I quickly checked my English to Local translator. Rando mooing- screaming like slutty orangutans, mating in the field loudly where others would be woken. The local cuztom has no negative conceptz for women enjoying or having zex. Concept of 'slut' does not exizt.

I didn't know why it had Z instead of S for a bunch of words, it was annoying.

"You can't prove it was us who set the town on fire. Maybe it was that crazy naked guy who stole our flying sled." One of the naked horny moms told the priestess. "Also, those men wanted to have sex with us."

"We would have gladly had casual sex with you." One of the men said, "We freaked out when hundreds of women ran at us with nets. And none of us wants to be married with kids yet, that is a major life change and responsibility you cannot force on us. Having casual sex and getting force-married are not the same."

"We sure can force it on you." Some of the horny moms giggled, "We'll pull you down from the trees by your genitals and force-marry you on the spot. Once that bracelet is fused to your wrist, you are married."

A bell started ringing in the town square. "Okay," one of the guards said, "The means the town's not on fire anymore. Those who have volunteered as tribute are free to enter the town, but stay away from the Labyrinth till that floating castle is dealt with. Once the hunt for minotaurs starts, good luck and stay safe."

The priestess placed her hand on the obelisk. By my holy decree, any man who was force-married may touch this obelisk and his fused bracelet will unfuse and fall off, the marriage never was. All you men who were force-married to the horny moms can touch the stone then return to town. Those who wish to stay married as second husbands may do so with the blessing of the Earth goddess." A large crowd of men started walking to the obelisk. "You horny moms stay here, you're still in trouble from all the arson and assaults."

"And then there is you," The priestess said addressing me. "Instead of telling law enforcement once you escaped, you helped that stupid, crazy wizard hijack a magic sled. Do you know he has been attacking innocent people for no reason? He's flying over in that sled and dropping rain deer poop out of a giant sack onto people all morning. Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

"Yeah, sorry about that." I said while trying as hard as I could not to laugh. "I'm high right now, and more than a little drunk. I think I just shit myself." I checked the back of the toga I was borrowing, "Yeah, I totally just shit myself." I took the toga off and dropped it on the ground.

A griffin landed, its beast before taking a large piece of hardened honey and sugar from his saddle bag and gave it to the griffin. He walked around it rubbing the soot from its feathers. "Bird....defeat...Magic-man." He said as he threw the homeless wizard to the ground, golden feathers gleaming in the morning glow, followed by the last sled. "Bird....defeat..." the rider clearly didn't speak local and was struggling with the words, "flame." He took the saddle and saddle bag off the beautiful

"He saved two kids from the burning barn and put the fire out." One of the guards said as she took control of the wizard. She had had time to throw on her armor but didn't have time to get dressed. Her firm naked ass was on display under her cuirass. "His griffin lifted a barrel of water from the river, then they dumped it on the blaze. He jumped from the griffin into the wizards sled and captured him. I saw the whole thing."

The rider turned toward me, I couldn't believe my eyes- My half-brother was alive! "Douglas! You're alive, how? How did you get here? Wait... what the hell are you wearing?" What he was wearing was skin tight David Bowie labyrinth pants and knee high riding boots. He was hung like a horse and the outline of his dick was clearly visible down his pants leg. He was not wearing a shirt, I noticed all the women were openly staring at his pecs and abs as well as other places.

The average size here for men was around 5'4" and about 120 pounds. The average height here for women was around 5'7" and a little heavier than the men. It was not unheard of for some women to reach 6 foot. My short height let me blend in with the locals. Then there was my half-brother. He was 6'10" and around 300 pounds of solid muscle.

The nude moms were staring at him wantonly. I could see they were visibly wet and their tails were straight up in a state I had come to understand meant arousal or lust.

"Arlo, can you translate from English into local?" he asked me in English. "I am alive, I'll explain later. Priestess, I have come to free the slaves and the town from the minotaurs. Here is money to pay for damages to the town from the fire and to buy weapons and medicine." He reached into his saddle bag and handed the priestess five of the million chit crypto-wafers. "I give no money for the slaves, we will fight for their freedom!"

"Where did you get all this stuff? That's more chits than this town normally sees all season." I asked, still in awe that my half-brother was here.

"I killed some giants. Grandfather Wicked, the Cannibal King gang, the Brothers three. They were three brothers that each had three heads. They had been enslaving people, eating people. I got a sword of sharpness, a force shield belt, a griffin, a whole bunch of other stuff, and a massive pile of loot."

The guards had backed Grandoff the wizard up against the rain deer. With a wave of his hand he said "These are not the droids you are looking."

"Okay, first off, we're not looking for droids, we're looking for you. And second, these are rain deer, not droids. How much mescaline are you on?" The guard asked, her nice ass wiggling as she tried to control the wizard.

"You can't win, if you strike me down I will become more powerful than you can possible imagine." The old wizard said, pulling a huge minotaur dildo from his belt. He held it like a sword, with the large minotaur scrotum like a cross guard. He gently squeeze the dildo's balls and a nearly two meter long blade of pure plasma shot forth with a loud burr sound. Waving the sword around wildly he cut the antlers off one of the deer behind him. The guards bolted for safety one way while the rain deer did the same the other way.

As the wizard turned to see what he had cut with his energy sword my half-brother threw a rutabaga, hitting the wizard in the face. The wizard turned back at my brother and charged, waving the sword in front of him. My brother hurled a second rutabaga at the wizard's head with his right hand and another with his left hand in a sort of curve ball from the hip motion. The wizard cut the rutabaga aimed at his head in half and brought his sword down quickly to stop the other. Instead, he sawed both his own legs off at the knee. "Arghhhhh" He howled, the sword falling from his hands, switching off, and landing at my brother's feet.

"This is why you don't drop acid, then wave a sword at people, especially a magic energy sword." I said.

"Your brother has bested me in single combat, so I will grant him a boon if he spares my life." The wizard pleaded. " I know you are the famous conqueror of giants; now, at the top of the floating mountain is an enchanted castle, kept by a giant named Galligantus, who, by the help of a vile magician, gets many knights into his castle, and there mind-download them into hogs. They also have a Duke's daughters who they changed into deer. They captured them and flew them up to the castle on an air-chariot drawn by fiery flying sloar. Many brave knights have tried to save them, all have burned in the belly of the sloar. That is all totally a thing they can do, not just some bullshit I made up cause I am high as fuck on peyote. I have blue prints to the fortress, access codes to shut down their deflector shields and tractor beams. I give them to you in exchange for my life." He threw the data crystal to Douglas.

He put one of the rutabaga in his mouth, slipped off his flying carpet robe, grabbed his two legs up off the ground, and with a shout flew up into the air. As he flew off he sang:

"Haste, valiant stranger, haste away,

Lest you become the giant's prey.

On his return he'll bring another,

Still more savage than his brother:

A horrid, cruel monster, who,

Before he kills, will torture you.

Oh valiant stranger! haste away,

Or you'll become these giants' prey."

It took me a second then I realized he must be the vile magician who was helping the giants. Otherwise how could he possible know any of those codes.

In local, my half-brother yelled to the crowd "I defeat...Magic-man. I buy your freedom with blood. Say...I...am... Spartacus."

One of the gay tributes stood up. "I have no idea what he is talking about but I'll say it." The guy shrugged "I'm Spartacus." Without missing a beat Douglas threw him a string of Mardi Gras beads. On Earth, this gaudy plastic jewelry would be worth pennies. Here, plastic was almost unheard of, no one had ever seen anything like it and he had just given 5 million chit to the priestess. The result was everyone assumed the beads were some sort of valuable jewelry.

Another guy jumped up and put his hand over the gay guy's mouth. "Shut up you little bitch, don't listen to him. I'm Spartacus." Douglas quickly threw a second string beads to the man.

Douglas pulled an arm full of the beads from his bag and within a heart beat the crowd had gone wild. "I'm Spartacus. I'm Spartacus." The crowd of naked people shouted. He threw an armful of the beads into the crowd then threw a second handful in front of the priestess. Within seconds the priestess and guards were knocked to the ground by the frenzied mob of people.

One of the young tributes ran up to Douglas and I, "I volunteer as tribute to the Earth man. My friends and I all do." Her eyes were fixed on his groin. He threw her his last few strings of beads. She and her friends squealed with excitement.

Blondie and Red came up behind us with some guy. I had not seen them since escaping from them earlier this morning. Both were just as naked as before. Red still had my dried jism matted in her bushy pussy hair. Blondie looked us both up and down before saying in broken English "Do not run. You're the tail-less humans from Earth. I've been searching for you for weeks. I killed the giant Cormoran, his brothers seek revenge on me. Do not run."

Red took the man up to the obelisk. His marriage bracelet bonds melted as he touched the smooth back surface of the stone and he slipped them off, handing them to Red. They hugged intimately for a long time, then he ran to a waiting flying sled and took off, flying hard and fast in the direction of the mainland. That is odd I thought. "My former promised, he was kidnapped from my home and forced married to a bitch a few months back. We've been looking for a way to get her marriage bracelets off him for months." She explained with a shrug.

The priestess stormed up covered in mud. Her voice shook with anger as she spoke. She looked at all four of us. "You have angered the gods. You mock our ways. You mock the gods. You set all of this up, all these hundreds of women here kidnapping men and force-marrying them, just to get your brother out of his forced marriage, didn't you? For you, today is the bachelorette party of the winter solstice. Your punishment is banishment for a year and a day and marriage, let's see you mock our marriage ways with some husbands of your own wiggling between your thighs. "

Turning to the Red and Blondie the priestess hissed. "These two males are now your husbands... Your junior-husbands... with all the rights and responsibilities that entails. They are your problem. Now get the fuck out of my city and take your stupid boy-husbands with you." Guards slapped bracelets onto our wrists, we stood in a circle with our bracelets touching. For a second, I felt a burning feeling in my wrists. When I looked down the bracelet was fused tight to my skin.

"The floating castle over the maze, it is said there are giants in it looking to take revenge for the killing of the giant Cormoran." One of the guards said in local. "It is really hurting business, the castle is an eye sore, and they're eating people, can you save us oh brave ones? Please tell your good giant brother to save us from the evil giants."

"What is going on? Are the slaves free?" Douglas asked me in English. "I'm really confused. Who are these women, are they freed slaves, do we own them now? What was up with that dude with the robes and the magic sword?"

"We got banished from their little shitty town by that ghost faced bitch." I replied. "Oh yeah, these are your wives."

"Which one?" Douglas asked, confusion clear on his face.

"They are both your wives and mine too. Can your griffin hold four people and get us up to that flying castle?" I asked. Douglas nodded, too shocked to speak. "Then let's get out of here." I said in local.

Red pointed to the south, I could see smoking rising from the distant flying mountain with its fortress.

"Hey you horny bitches, give us a little while. We are going to fly up there. Kill the giant and turn his flying oppression palace into a mobile sex dungeon." Red yelled to the nude women "Party at the flying castle this afternoon!"

All the women cheered and started getting the flying sleds and flying rain deer ready.

***Planet New Assuwa- outside of the Island town of Hogshead, the flying fortress-palace above the labyrinth; 11am***

The access codes the wizard gave us were old, but good so we were able to land the griffin on one of the many landing pads below the fortress. Some droids walked up to tend to our griffin, they took hoses off the wall, turned a handle, and started bathing the beast with cool water. There was piping all along the ceiling both to water any flying beasts and to put out the blaze if a flying machine caught fire.