tagNonHumanElf Pleasure: Amy

Elf Pleasure: Amy


"Is there any more chocolate-chip?"

Kelly watched as Amy searched through the freezer. She looked unkempt, straight out of bed, her hair sticking out in all directions. "Have you brushed your teeth?"

"No." Amy continued searching for the ice cream.

Okay. She'd have to be cruel to be kind, Kelly decided. "I think you've gained a few this past week. Have you been on the scales lately?"

Amy's hand stilled for a moment, but then started rummaging again, hesitantly. "I don't care really," she muttered. Suddenly, she banged the freezer shut and sank down on a kitchen chair. "Oh my God! I do! I do care! How can I not care? I have to care!" she wailed, before burying her face in her hands.

Kelly hurried to envelop her in a hug. She didn't know what to do to ease her friend's distress. With Christmas around the corner, all the shit that Amy was going through was making her even more depressed. She didn't like looking at Amy destroying herself like this, which is why she'd hidden the half-finished carton of chocolate chip last night. Amy was gaining weight - and it showed. This was good in a way because Kelly had always thought Amy was too skinny, but it could mean cancelled contracts for her as a runway model. Amy didn't need that right now. She had to have all the confidence she could get. Comfort food was good, but so much? Bad.

"What am I going to do Kelly?" Amy's muffled voice found its way out from between her hands.

"How about a nice green salad?" Kelly strove for some humour. "Or... how about pigging out on yoghurt and grapefruit?" She rubbed her hands across Amy's back soothingly.

Amy sniffled. "You're a good friend Kelly." She sighed. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Yes, well, you don't have to think about that really. I'm here and I'm running your life for the next few days until you're better, ok?"

Amy chuckled. "Do I have any say in what happens to me?"

Kelly smiled. "Some."

"I'd like to eat but not put on weight."

Kelly rolled her eyes. "I said I'm running your life, which means you do what I tell you to. It doesn't mean I can turn nature around to keep you skinny even though you stuff your face. Try again. Concentrate on it being something doable this time."

"Hmmm... how about finding a couple of hot men who'd give me mind-blowing orgasms?"

Kelly's eyes widened. "Are you serious?"

Amy laughed. "Of course not, silly. This whole mess I'm in, it's because of a guy. If that swine hadn't left me to run off after that skank...." She took a deep breath. "Right now I want all of them dead. Wiped off the face of this earth. Incinerated." Amy cocked her hands in a gun shape and made bzzt bzzt noises while pointing them as if men were nothing but flies who could be eradicated as easily as flies that had found themselves in intimate contact with one of those electrical current fly traps.

"God, this could be so satisfying!" she whooped.

Kelly was relieved. Amy was sounding a little like her old self. "Yeah. Death to all men! Who needs them anyway? But you know..." she continued slowly, "...they're kind of good for orgasms."

Amy made a face. "Nah. I could do that without them too." And with that she tromped off to the bathroom.

All this talk about mind-blowing orgasms had given Kelly the niggling of an idea. She didn't know if she should do it, hell, she didn't know if she could, but she would try.

She remembered the last time she'd had a break-up. It was two years ago this Christmas, and she remembered how broken-hearted she had been. Fabian had come into her life then, and had made her feel loved and wanted. She now wondered if he could help Amy in the same way.

Kelly tiptoed to the door and closed it. She cleared her throat, and then a thought occurred to her. He said he'd come when she called him, but was there a time limit to it? It had been two years. Would he still come?

Well, it was worth a try.

Kelly opened her mouth... and closed it again. Maybe she should ask Amy about this? Maybe she should check that Amy was occupied before going ahead? Maybe she should stop making excuses and just do it? Yes? Okay, so she took another deep breath, and called out to him.

"Fabian, please come. I need you."

There, that should do it. She looked around, and yes, there was that familiar little chocolate brown figure coming through in the window.

Kelly stared. The window? Why the window?

"Hi Kelly. You had the door closed," he explained.

"Oh." Kelly was at a loss for words, but she battled on, "That was for Amy. You know Amy, right?"

"Ah, yes. That delightful young woman. Of course I remember her."

Something twitched in the region where Kelly thought her heart was. Delightful? Well, Amy was delightful, but... she frowned and caught herself. Was she actually jealous of her own friend?

"Kelly? What's wrong?" Fabian was peering at her with narrowed eyes.

Kelly sat down in a chair and sighed. "Why do you ask?" she asked him. "You can read my mind, can't you? Elves can."

She looked him over. He was exactly how she remembered him - small, chocolate-coloured, with kind eyes. Her very own elf.

Fabian watched her with his head cocked to one side.

"Oh, dammit. Listen, I need your help. Well, you know, like when I had broken up with Alex and was sad, you helped me through it? I want you to... well, I don't know... Amy and I were talking this morning and she just happened to mention, well, ummm... mind-blowing orgasms, and I thought... the best I had ever had were... oh my god, this is really tough!"

Fabian grinned. He actually grinned, and sent Kelly into an incoherent sort of rage. He was enjoying this. How dare he!

"Why are you doing this to me?" she hissed.

"What am I doing?" he asked, amused.

"You can read my mind!" she grumbled. "You know what I'm trying to tell you. Why are you making me do it?"

"Ah, well." Fabian fingered his chin. "Sorry. Was just having some fun. So you want me to help your friend, but you're too possessive about me to let me give her mind-blowing orgasms."

Kelly's eyes widened. He could read her mind all right - every little thought, even those drenched in self-denial and hidden in the depths of her mind. Yes, he could read it. She just didn't want him to be this accurate about it. A girl needed some places of hers left uninvaded.

"Well, that's why I wanted you to tell me what you wanted," Fabian mumbled.

"I just want her happy," Kelly said earnestly. "I do care for her."

"Of course you do." Fabian smiled. "And I think I have a solution for you."

Kelly tensed.

"No, it's not what you think," he continued. "I'm not about to go down on her. There's someone else actually. I met him a few days ago, and I think..." Fabian chuckled before going on, "...I think he would be perfect for her."

"What are you going to do? You're not going to set her up with some man, are you? Don't do that. She hates men right now. She's not in the right frame of mind for that, she just needs some fun and loving..." Kelly stopped babbling and realised she was sounding too much like a mother hen.

Fabian smiled kindly at her. "No, it's not a man. In fact...." He went to the door and threw it wide open, mumbling, "He probably isn't fit enough for the window."

And Kelly saw another Fabian walk in. He was a perfect copy of the little elf standing right in front of her, but something was different -- something imperceptible. Kelly scrunched up her brow in concentration. Okay, he looked... somehow older, though how, she had no idea, because he had the same lean built, same arms, same face and the same... oh, there it was. He wasn't smiling. In fact, he was frowning.

"Hi Harold!" Fabian greeted him like an old friend.

Harold looked at Fabian and nodded at him, then turned to Kelly and gave her a sweeping look from her head to her toes.

"This is Kelly," Fabian introduced her. "And Kelly, this is Harold, a dear friend."

"Hi," Kelly offered tentatively.

Harold nodded at her.

Fabian coughed uncomfortably. "Kelly here needs our help," he said. "You know what she needs," he added.

Just then, there was a flurry at the door and Amy walked in, still in her bathrobe, but much more awake with a freshly scrubbed face. She stopped short when she saw the two little men.

"Amy! You remember Fabian?" Kelly asked her.

"Yes, but..." Amy looked very confused. "There are two of him?"

Kelly managed to disguise her sudden laugh into a cough and Fabian grinned. Harold's frown deepened.

Fabian cleared his throat and explained. "Amy, I'm Fabian. This," he gestured, "is Harold."

"You're called Harold? Why, that is so absur..." She stopped, obviously realising that she shouldn't be so outspoken about someone's name.

"What exactly is so absurd about Harold?" Harold asked. "It's a perfectly respectable name." His voice was deeper than Fabian's.

"Well, nothing I suppose, unless you're an elf. I just haven't met an elf called Harold ever."

"And just how many elves have you met before?" Harold asked her patiently.

"Oh. Well. You know what I mean. Harold is not a very... elf-like... name. I mean, it's so grown-up!"

Harold looked at her for a beat before replying dryly. "Well, I'm grown-up. I'm 118."

Amy's eyes bulged. "Years?" she squeaked.

"Of course, years," Harold replied calmly.

"Oh. My. God." Amy looked completely shocked.

Kelly was much too surprised herself. "One hundred and eighteen?"

Fabian cleared his throat again. "Stop playing with the ladies, Harold. 118 is about middle-aged in an elf's life. We live to be about 250 on an average."

"Wow." Amy seemed awe-struck. "I've never seen someone who's 118 before."

Harold raised an eyebrow at her, spread his hands and shrugged as if to say, 'well, here I am'.

Amy shook her head from side to side like she still couldn't believe it, and stood there, staring at Harold.

"Um... Amy? Breakfast?" Kelly wanted to distract Amy and get her out of the kitchen soon without being too obvious about it. She didn't really know what was going on, and if Fabian thought that he could pair off Amy with Harold... well, that wasn't going to happen. This was a stupid, stupid plan.

"Breakfast? Yes. Sure." Amy was still half occupied by the two small men in the middle of their kitchen.

"Coffee?" Kelly asked.

"Yes." Amy wandered over to the table and sat down on one of the chairs.


"Yes." She was still giving Harold little, unobtrusive looks.

Kelly wondered if Amy was even listening to her. "Ice cream?" she asked next.


"The rest of the carton?"


"With the two chocolate bars I have in my bag?"



She whipped around her head at that to look at Kelly.

"Are you even listening to me?" Kelly demanded.

"Of course. You were asking me about... breakfast?"

Kelly sighed and served her coffee. "You can make whatever else you want yourself," she huffed.

"Ugh! I'm sorry. I guess I'm just not in a sociable mood. And you should entertain your guests. I'm... I will just... I think I'll take my coffee into my room and be back in a bit, ok?" Amy shuffled off.

Kelly watched her go and soon as she was out of earshot, she whipped her head around to face Fabian. "No," she said quite clearly.

"But why not? Harold isn't as grumpy and forbidding as he looks."

There was a sputter from Harold at this. "Excuse me?! I'm right here."

"Yes, yes Harold, you are. It's just that... listen, don't take this personally." Fabian tried to soothe the other elf.

"Not personally? How else then? Humph!" Harold's frown deepened.

"Kelly, he's not as crotchety always. Maybe his back's acting up?"

Harold advanced on him.

Fabian took a step back. "No, Harold. I don't mean you're crotchety really. It's just that you're a teeny bit grumpy today, aren't you?" Fabian turned to look at Kelly. "I wouldn't do anything that would hurt your friend, would I? Harold is a marshmallow really, under all that gruffness, he's a puppy. Believe me."

"I can't believe this," Harold muttered.

"Neither can I, actually," Kelly chimed in.

Fabian threw up his hands. "Ok, I admit defeat. We won't do it if you don't think it's a good idea. I thought it would work, but... well... okay." He turned, walked into a corner and sat down.

Harold cleared his throat. "Do I have any say in this?"

Kelly looked at the little frowning creature. "Yes, tell me." She felt sorry for the poor thing.

Harold sighed. "You do not have to feel sorry for me."

Kelly caught herself and tried to clear her head of all thought. Damn these little beings who could invade minds like this!

Harold continued. "Well, I'm an elf. And elves always strive to make people happy. I'm no different. I might look like someone's idea of a cantankerous old fuddy-duddy, but I cannot be mean or hurt anyone. It's the way I'm made and maybe because of the way I look, people don't really give me a chance to do anything for them." He stopped, gathering his thoughts. "Well, all I can say is -- my job is to make people happy. And I think I can make your friend contented, if only for a few moments."

Fabian nodded from his corner. "That's what I've been trying to say."

Kelly was undecided. She wanted Amy well on the way to healing, and she knew how the little elf had made her feel two years ago -- loved and special, but she didn't want Amy hurt. Was what she was orchestrating right? Who called elves to mend broken hearts? Was she, maybe, losing it? Maybe all this was better stopped now than regretted later? But then, she couldn't think of anything else to help her friend.

"Kelly, you're thinking too much." That came from Fabian in the corner. "This should be about what Amy wants."

"I'll leave if the lady tells me to, okay?" That was Harold.

Howard's offer clinched it for Kelly. "But if you upset that girl, I swear I'll hurt you," she told Harold.

Harold turned away and walked out of the room, grumbling about helping people and getting threats in return.

* * * * *

Amy was sitting by the windowpane on the ledge, looking out and sipping from her coffee mug when Harold entered. She looked around at him. "Oh, hey," she greeted him with a smile.

"Hi." Harold settled down cross-legged on the carpet and cleared his throat. He didn't know how to do this. "Do you need..." he stopped. He couldn't just barge in like that, could he?

"Yes? Do I need what?" Amy looked at him with an expectant look on her face.

"Well, do you need... anything?" Harold asked.

"No, thank you. Coffee's enough for now."

"No. Yes. No. I didn't mean..." Harold swallowed. This was harder than he thought it would be. "Well, Fabian called me here to..." he stopped and sighed. He looked up at her. "Amy. You're a delightful girl," he said sincerely.

She smiled. "Thank you," she said softly.

"And you're hurting," Harold continued. "I want to help you somehow. Would you let me?"

Amy looked at him. "I'm not sure how you'll do that."

"Ah. Well. It involves... you know... um... you were talking about mind-blowing orgasms earlier this morning?"

Amy stared at him. Then her gaze softened. "Harold, are you blushing?"

He shook his head vigorously. "Of course not! I don't blush," he said gruffly.

Amy laughed delightedly. "You're such a darling."

Harold got up and walked to Amy. He took her hand in his and waited until she got to her feet, then led her to the stuffed chair in the corner. "Your coffee's done?" he asked her, and when she nodded, took the empty cup from her and put it on the floor under the chair.

"Harold? What are you doing?" She sounded anxious.

"Giving you a relaxing massage," he replied.

She looked at him suspiciously, but put her head back and relaxed.

"Don't worry," Harold soothed. "You're in good hands."

He felt her body relaxing as he took both her hands in his and rubbed her palms soothingly. He placed her hands beside her knees on the chair, and kneeled in front of her. She tensed a little as his hands found the back of her legs, but loosened up again when he only kneaded gently. "I won't hurt you, Amy," he whispered.

She nodded and her lashes dampened imperceptibly. "You're being so good to me," she whispered, almost too softly for him to hear. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," he murmured and took her foot in his hands, gently working it.

"I'm not usually like this. I'm not weepy. Its just that... too much kindness... you all are being so good to me. It makes me feel incredibly grateful." She sighed and closed her eyes.

"Yes, I know."

"That feels good..."

"It does?" Harold kissed the insides of her knees.

She sighed. "Yes."

Harold trailed his fingers up her thigh, under her robe. Amy's eyes remained closed, so he got bolder and spread her legs a little for better access. He kissed her thighs and moved up, feeling the edges of her panties.

Amy shifted in her chair.

"Relax," Harold whispered. "Let go of your inhibitions. Enjoy this." His finger trailed over her centre, feeling the warmth there. While his finger teased her, his tongue made little swipes over her thighs.

Amy felt like she was in a dream. Her limbs hung loose, her breath was slow, and deep; it felt like she was breathing something thicker than air. Her body felt warm and tingly all over. She was completely relaxed and secure. Every touch and sensation seemed amplified, as if she was drugged.

Harold felt her wetness seeping through and replaced his finger with his tongue. He lapped at her lightly until her panties were soaked, and then slipped them off so easily from under her that Amy didn't realise they were gone until she felt him touch her there.

Her upper body arched reflexively, bringing her chest to Harold's attention. He placed his hands on her breasts and started kneading them. Amy moaned at the contact. His pointy tongue prodded her sex, eliciting another moan and causing her hips to squirm. She was pushing down towards him.

"More?" Harold asked her.

"Oh yes, please." Amy's speech was slow, slurred.

Harold smiled and prepared to give her the thorough loving she deserved. A finger found its way inside her and he heard her sigh as he burrowed it deep inside her. Her stomach clenched as she felt him move inside her. He added another finger to the first and established a slow rhythm.

It was not hurried, nothing earthshaking. Instead, the slow and honeyed assault had Amy's insides melting slowly and steadily, until her fingers curled with the slow building heat. She felt something in her start to uncurl as she registered Harold suckling on her clit.

His fingers were going in and out of her, with her hips moving to meet them with every thrust. Amy abandoned herself to the feeling that gripped her, the ride that took her higher and higher until she could take it no longer and felt herself explode with the sheer pleasure of it all. As the waves washed over her, Amy let herself enjoy every heightened sensation that she could.

When it was over, Amy opened her eyes to see Harold watching her intently.

"That was good," Amy murmured, moving down next to him on the carpet. She sighed and continued, "You're not as grumpy as you look. You're a sweetie really." She threw an arm over him, cuddled up and settled down next to him for a relaxing morning. "It's going to be a lovely Christmas."

* * * * *

Author's note: I'd like to thank RogueLurker for her valuable suggestions on this story and deathlynx for being my guinea pig reader.

To the readers: I hope you liked the story. Votes, comments and feedback are always appreciated. I like hearing from you so please do write. Every email with a return address will receive a reply. :)

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