Elise and Harvey Barrios

byMatt Moreau©

"I think we may have the guy," said Sandy. "If he was hard because of the humiliating circumstances of you peeing on him, he's a dead duck and you win. Trust me.

"When is he going to get out of the hospital?" said Sandy


I knew I'd told Elise that we would talk, but I was not ready to mambo out and away from the hospital's loving care and risk dueling with her in my weakened state. Still, that said, I was feeling a good bit better, and the hematoma to my brain had shrunk—the doctor's words—to the point that I was no longer in any serious danger.

My room at the Hard Hat was clean and my stuff was all there, just as I knew it would be. I slept in my first day back and followed doctor's orders to not push things too hard.

I had not figured—and I should have—on my wife's resolve to converse with me. Two days after getting back to work, I was sitting at a table in the Hard Hat. I was just relaxing in the waning moments of the late afternoon, a cup of hot tea in front of me. I was accosted by a slim and pretty blond who, as she stood there, assured me that I had nothing to fear from talking with her—the blond that is. Her name was Sandra Canby. She laughed as she took the seat across from me without being asked to.

"You can call me Sandy," said Sandy.

"Okay. What can I do for you ma'am, uh Sandy," I said. She smiled.

"Weeell, maybe it's more like what I can do for you," she said. I began to smell a rat.

"Look miss, I don't pay..." I started. She feigned a pained expression.

"You too good for me?" she said. Her features were now passive and patient.

"Hah!" I said. "More like you'd be too good for me." She looked me up and down.

"Not the answer I expected from a big strong fellow like you," she said. I wasn't big or especially strong, and I knew it; but I let her remarks, which I knew were not meant to be insulting, slide.

Yeah, well, my wife—used to be wife—assures me that I'm not man enough for any woman," I said. That stopped her, or so I imagined.

"Huh? Used to be wife? Man enough? What are you talking about, mister?" she said.

"Small dick, no skills, and no hope of ever getting either. The five sisters take care of me thank you very much. So take your prostitute's ass elsewhere. Okay!" I said. I was beginning to tear up again. Why had I unloaded on her? I didn't know. Frustration at my lack of hope I suppose. I really didn't know. But, at least I wasn't setting myself up for another crusher.

She sat back in her chair and stared at me. "Kinda down on yourself aren't you?" she said.

"Just up and travel, okay. I don't need the aggravation or the humiliation, so just leave me alone," I said.

"Wow! You are down on yourself. I would never have suspected it.

"You say your wife told you that you were hopeless? Hey, I've seen guys with little weenies lots of times. It ain't no biggee," she said.

"Maybe not for you; you're in business to please not to be pleased. But for a wife I just ain't got what it takes. And, I never have nor ever will pay for a piece of ass," I said. She studied me.

"This might be the challenge of a lifetime, and I may be some kind of sucker here—and I don't mean the cock sucking kind. But, I'm gonna take a chance.

"How long has it been for you?" she said.

"Over five years," I said.

"Sweet Jesus! five years? Five years!

"You must be climbing the walls," she said. The look in her eyes was genuine sympathy; there was no doubt in my mind about that.

"Oh yeah, you're getting a freebie from me—now! Come on," she said.

"Huh? What? I don't..." I started.

"You don't have anything to say about it, mister. You're getting fucked today, so get used to the idea. I can't let it get out that the male population around here can be intimidated to not want sex," she said.

"I didn't say I didn't want it; I said I know that no woman would want me. My wife is kinda an expert in these things," I said.

"Unless she's a prostie like me, baby; she ain't no expert," said Sandy. "And besides, as an added bonus today, and today only, I am going to give you an unbiased analysis of your skills when we're done. How's that for a deal?" I looked at her and thought she had a point.

A prostie, as she referred to herself, would at least be more concerned with my feelings than my wife was; that was an actual fact.

"Okay then. Where?" I asked.

"Follow me, I have a pad nearby."


The pad, as she called it, was nearby, like two blocks away nearby. I wondered why I'd never seen her in the bar before. Didn't ladies of the night like bars?

Sandy was a very nice looking gal, I decided. If I could get a free lay, and maybe a little advice, I'd count it as time well spent.

The apartment was small, one bedroom, a comfort room, and what I can only describe as a combination kitchenette-dinette-livingroomette; I mean small, but it evidently served her purpose.

"I'll be right back. You make yourself comfortable," she said. I did so on the little love seat by the wall. The apartment was warm, but that had to be counted as lucky because, when she came back from the bedroom, she was naked. I stared.

"You look fantastic," I said. She smiled her gratitude at me.

"Come here big boy," she said. She crooked a figure at me beckoning me. I obeyed her. She let me kiss her. I made sure to be gentle; I did not want to ruin the mood. I made up my mind to do my level best to please her. I knew I didn't have much hope of measuring up—no pun intended—but, maybe I could please her in other ways. That was my goal.

Her arms around my neck, she melded her body to my still clothed one. She pushed me a back a little.

"Take your clothes off, okay," she said. I nodded and began to mechanically undress myself. I hadn't been naked in front of a woman in five years: the one while I stayed with Elise even after discovering her and that Harry guy, and the four years since; I felt a little shy around this very experienced—so I imagined—pro. Stupid to say it, but that was the word.

I was hard as a rock. My almost masculine weapon did not look to threatening to her, that I was sure of.

Her hands dangled at her sides. She stood back a step and eyed it, my penis. "It is a little on the small side," she announced. "But, believe it or not, I've seen smaller. Now let's see if you know what to do with it, and, with a woman." I swallowed big. Nervous didn't even begin to describe me at that moment. I took her in my arms and kissed her, still gently, but with a deal of pent up passion. She ground herself into me, and I hardened yet more. I must have squeezed her with a little too much enthusiasm because she grimmaced.

"Careful, big guy, I'm not real fragile, but I can break," she said.

"Oh—I'm—I mean..."

"Calm down, let Sandy take the lead, okay. You'll be fine."

As we stood there she played with my cock and kinda smiled moving her head from side to side. I had the feeling that I was being evaluated.

"Get down on your knees, Harvey, please," she said. I immediately did as she told me. "Now, kiss me Harvey. Yes, like that. Right there. Now french-kiss me Harvey, there." She braced herself against my face as I licked and sucked on her pussy lips. I did my best to try and fuck her with my tongue; she came. And, I know it was real because of the juices she squirted on to my face.

A few minutes later she used a single finger to raise my gaze to hers. "Stand up, young man," she said. She guided me over to the love seat and had me sit on the edge. She knelt between my legs and once again played a little with my cock. Leaning forward, she took the whole of it into her mouth. As she did, I felt her insinuate a finger into my ass. I felt her brush against my prostate. It was the most erotic thing I had ever experienced. I came in gobs; she swallowed a good deal of it.

Wiping her mouth with the back of her hand, she tendered me a serious look. "Well, you tasted good," she said. "My turn on the couch." She pulled me off and knelt on it with her butt pushed back toward me. "Get your face in there, mister, and do me good with that tongue of yours. And, don't neglect my anus," she said.

"I'd never licked a woman's butt before, but I didn't hesitate. I was so horny that I was actually almost hard again after but minutes since having cum in her mouth. I ministered to her holes for some time before I got my next command. "Now push that little cock of yours into me and fuck me, Harvey. Give me the best you've got." I tried. Oh God, how I tried. I only hoped that I had had some measure of success in pleasing her.

It took but a few minutes to get to the point of pumping my second load into her, this time into her pussy. I strained to hold back as long as I could before spurting. She felt me shrinking and looked rearward at me; I felt like I was being judged. She sighed.

Coming down from the couch." She pulled me to the floor with her. We made out for some little time. Then, rolling to the side and propping herself up on an elbow, she looked at me critically.

I didn't want to leave, but I wondered how much she was going to let me do, since she was doing me gratis. I soon got the answer to my question.

"You're not done yet, young man," she said. "But, the next go 'round is in the bedroom." She stood and waited for me to do likewise. I wasn't sure that I had another shot in me, but she evidently had little doubt about that.

She laid herself face down on the bed and spread her legs wide. "The KY jelly is there," she said, nodding in the direction of the nightstand. "Use a lot of it on yourself and then push a bunch inside my butt. Don't be stingy with it. You may be small, but a butt needs a lot of care regardless of the size of the cock that you guys shove into it. Okay."

"Yes, ma'am," I said. I'd never butt fucked a woman before not even my wife. I was intrigued. I Plied her with a huge amount of the slick goo.

As I pushed into her, she grunted. All in, I began to fuck her. She got into it after a short time and started ramming back at me each time I slammed into her. It was fully ten minutes before I unloaded inside of her. I almost passed out from the thrill of it; yes, the thrill of it. Finally sated, I rolled off and waited for the angels in heaven to come and retrieve my certainly about to expire body.

We were asleep in minutes. The smell of coffee woke me. I found her in the combo room.

"Sleep good, mister?" she said.

"Apparently," I said, "I don't remember any of it."

She motioned me to sit down. I did. "Was it okay for you?" she said. "I mean doing a whore?" I stared at her and gathered myself to answer her objectively.

She poured the coffees and brought them to the table. She sat across from me, her robe falling open, exposing her breasts.

"It was fucking wonderful," I said. "You? Tell me truly, please. I can take it."

"Hmm. You can, can you," she said. "Okay, then, here it is.

"You were okay. Not wonderful, but okay. I got off when you ate me at the start. I think you know that, but not from you fucking me.

"You're dick reminds me of the little engine that could. Honestly, it felt good inside of me, and yes, I could feel you in spite of what you may think. I especially liked you in my ass. You didn't hurt me like some men with larger cocks. It was actually quite—stimulating.

"Overall, you have possibilities. You need to learn a few things, and, it will take a woman to teach them to you. But, it is more than possible for you to be a decent lover given that you do learn.

"At any rate that is my truthful analysis of your performance. Your wife is probably not going to ever be satisfied with the size of your dick, but that does not mean that it is impossible to satisfy her. Okay?"

"Sandy, thank you. I think I enjoyed you more than I have any woman in my whole life, not that I've had many, but..."

"I understand. We'll talk again," she said. "But, now it is time to eat."


"You fucked him! My husband! You screwed him! Some friend you are, Sandy," said Elise.

"He needed it, Elise. I mean he really needed to get off. I've never seen the like. Desperate is the word that comes to mind—and maybe hopeless. You absolutely destroyed that man. I'm just hoping he doesn't find out that it was a set up; I think he might end it all if he did," said Sandy. Elise looked at her friend and then let the tears come.

"Sweet fucking damn it! Why couldn't he understand what I meant. I love the guy; always will. I know he's lost to me now, but in my heart he will always have the first place.

"Men, I don't understand how they think or what they think is important; all I know is that whatever it is; it's wrong!" said Elise.

"I'm in the number one girl profession of all time, Elise, men are my game. No psychologist, unless she's been a prostitute, knows more about the subject than someone like me. And I'm here to tell you, Elise, that what men think, and what they feel is most important, is not the great mystery of life that you seem to think it is.

"Men are very fragile creatures if the truth be known. Men think that how and what we women think of them is the most important thing in the world. Wanna hurt 'em? All you have to do is sneer at them, or laugh at them—or—tell them they're worthless in the sack. Their egos are almost certainly lost forever if a woman lays any of the three on them," said Sandy. "And Elise, to some degree you hit Harvey with all three. We definitely have a chore ahead of us."


Talking to the prostie, got me to thinking about the miserable situation I was in—as if I hadn't almost every day as it was. Fucking her got me a deal of relief in the thinking about it too. God she'd been good. Maybe that was gonna be my path out of my years' long funk. Just do it with Sandy, or someone like her, and pay the money. Others have. Why not me, I thought. What was special about me—fucking nothing, as I have been more than assured by my sometime wife. I looked at my watch; my advisor was late.

"Hey, bud, whatcha got for me?' said Molly. "Hey, you're smiling. What's going on?"

"Well, last night was kind of a mark-the-calendar kind of night, if you get my drift," I said.

"Pussy! You got pussy last night. You did didn't you?" said Molly.

"Yes!" I said, a little too emphatically. "Well, I kinda did anyway."

"Kinda did? What's kinda did? Was your dick inside of a woman?" asked Molly.

"Well, yes, of course, but..."

"But?" said Molly.

"It was with a prostitute—a nice one though," I said.

"You paid for it? You paid for a prostitute?" said Molly. It was clear she was a little disappointed in me.

"No-no-no. She did it with me, and she is a prostitute; but, it was free," I said.

"Really? That's sounds—odd. Are you two an item? Is there more to this little happening?" said Molly.

"Well, no, and yes. We met here at the Hard Hat. She made me an offer, if you get my drift. I said no. Then, somehow, we got to talking. I told her about my situation; she felt sorry for me I guess. So I got a freebie. Molly, I have to tell you, I was grateful. I knew it was the very definition of a mercy fuck, or maybe a pity fuck would be closer to the right way to say it; but, I loved it and she didn't make me feel like a loser. Molly, I needed that; I mean I really needed that.

"As for us, she and I, being an item, no. I wouldn't say it was anything like the start of something like that. Maybe if I were to see her again; well, I just don't know. And, anyway, she was a pro doing a potential John a good deed. Would a woman with that much experience wanna saddle herself with a loser like me? I don't think so," I said.

"Was she even single?" said Molly. "How did she react when you two were naked together?"

"You mean when she saw my equipment, right? She was okay with it I guess; said she'd seen smaller. And, no, she's single. At least that's what she told me. Never been married." The look on Molly's face was one of doubt.

"Molly? Something wrong? Did I do wrong? I mean I really needed what she did for me..." I said.

"No-no. It's just—I've known some pros in my day. And on a rare occasion a few of them have given out a freebie or two. But, almost none of them would be sharing their innermost secrets and personal lives with a stranger they just met, and especially one with your kinda baggage. But, I guess there's always a first time," said Molly. I nodded.

"Anyway," said Molly, "you gonna go back to your state of depression or was your friendly local pro able to shake you out of it?" Her saying that to me made me realize that I didn't know what I was going to do. I had been in a semi-euphoric state for almost twenty-four hours. The question now was: now what?"

I looked at her. "I don't know?" It was Molly's turn to nod.


After my talk with Molly, I understood that I indeed did want to see Sandy again. But, I also realized that I had not gotten her phone number. I really was a loser, I thought. Any other man—and I do mean any other man—would have gotten that without the slightest doubt. I wanted to kick myself.


While my self-deprecation was more than justified and deserved, the good luck, as I saw it, that was about to manifest itself, was not.

For the first time in a long time I was early. I figured to have a beer or two before I began my shift.

I was sitting at the bar when she slid on to the stool beside me. "How are you doing, Harv," said a very pretty Sandy. "Haven't heard from you or seen you around."

I had to smile at that. "I had no way to get in touch with you," I said.

She smiled and placed her hand atop mine. "Yeah, I figured as much. As many things as we said to each other last we met, we spoke very little about our situations: jobs, contacts, anything like that," she said. "You're here tonight though. This your regular hangout?"

I was surprised. She didn't know. "Yes, and no," I said. I work here—midnight to eight in the morning—seven days a week," I said. Her look was neutral.

"Work here? What do you do at those hours?" she said.

"Janitor slash security guard," I said. "I've actually got a little room here in the back."

"Really?" Her look now was one of interest if not actual concern. "I remember when we were—done—after our evening together, that you'd mentioned something about being a computer expert or something. I naturally thought..."

"I am—was. After my breakup with my wife; well, I just couldn't seem to get it together. You know; we did talk about that, I remember that. Anyway, I wound up here. It suits me for now. Has for the last year plus," I said. She nodded and pushed a slip of paper over to me; it was her phone number.

I looked at it and up at her. "Does this mean what I hope it means," I said. "I mean, Sandy, I still don't pay for; well, you know." She laughed. "I mean, maybe in your case—I might..."

"No, for you there is never going to be any charge. Believe it or not, you did it for me. Your tenderness and attitude made me want to see you again." She paused. "On the flip side, Harvey, I don't want you to get the idea that I'm an easy lay: just a way to get your rocks off. Yes, I do it for money, but apart from that world, from business, I'm the same as any other woman."

I know my brows knitted. I didn't know what to say to that. So, I said the only thing that made any sense at that moment. "Okay, that's cool with me," I said. She saw what must have appeared a look of disappointment on my face as I spoke.

She laid her hand once again on mine. "Harvey, I am not saying you can't ever have me. It's just, well, you have to earn your way inside of me.

"The last time we were together I was your therapist. Next time, Harvey, I will be your date. I mean if something like that appeals to you. I know you've been hurt. And while I don't agree that you reacted wisely to your wife's words and actions, I do understand why you did what you did. I intend to be very gentle with you, mister. Anyway," she pointed to the slip of paper I was still holding in my hand, "that is a bona fide offer." I nodded.

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