F6: Bliss

Gabriel had been withdrawn and uncommunicative until her recovery had been announced and Lisbeth prayed that he didn't see it as God's retribution for the illicit meeting on the eve of their wedding. She yearned to see him and make sure he understood that this was not their fault but only the anger of a spoilt girl who was used to getting what she wanted. She had asked to see him but was unsure if her request would be granted. The hospital had stipulated that immediate family only could visit her while she had been in the coma and since she had woken it seemed to have remained that way with her mother being the only familiar face she had seen since the first day that she woke.

The second day saw a delegation from the commune arrive at the hospital. Her mother was sent home to take care of her family's needs for the day. Two by two the female elders of the commune visited with Lisbeth, telling her news of her friends and the general day to day life of the commune. They each stayed for an hour or two before giving way to another pair of women. The Choir Mistress and her sister came late in the afternoon and Lisbeth smiled at the familiar face.

"Well this has certainly gotten way out of hand," the choir mistress said distastefully taking Lisbeth by surprise. "I don't know why you must persist in all this obnoxious behaviour. You merely had to wait for a week, and you could have been gone to the sister Assembly and that would have been the end of the whole debacle."

"Put an end to what?" Lisbeth asked in shock at the venom in the voice of the woman she had thought to be a caring friend.

"This nonsense with Gabriel," she spat. "Do you know how much work I had to put into getting you passage away from us and him?"

"From the time my daughter was born Gabriel's mother, and I had planned their wedding," the other woman raised her face to look squarely at Lisbeth who gasped as she realised who it was. "My Selena did not do what you say she did, and you better recount that story before you leave this place. You will also give back the promise ring you stole from Gabriel," she ordered.

Lisbeth wanted to laugh the whole situation. It was ludicrous. She had tried to dissuade Gabriel for months, dreaming of escape from the strict confines of the commune. She was shocked to speechlessness.

"Hush Margaret," The choir mistress turned on her sister. "In this bag," she indicated a large canvas bundle that lay on the floor, there are several sets of reasonable clothes, a bus ticket to Tenterfield and an address of a friend of mine who is a singing coach there who will help you find your way in the world. Don't come back, just leave here and this place. It will be better for everyone," she said her harsh tones softening slightly as she added, "even you."

"Your mother was an outsider, did she ever tell you that?" Margaret sneered. "People like her shouldn't be allowed to steal our men and bear their children. Selena was clumsy, but you can rest assured that if you dare to come back and go through with this absurd wedding plan, I won't make the same mistakes." The threat was clear in her tone.

"Margaret! Stop, now is not the time. Lisbeth wants to escape don't you dear? You were just waiting for the opportunity, like the visit to Pastor Phillips Assembly. Alas, that will not happen for you now though I imagine Abigail will still have the opportunity. I doubt she will wish to return once she is offered a place there as you would have been. It's a much more progressive assembly than ours, with their clothes and attitudes to love," she said knowingly. "I quite enjoy my little visits to Miles."

Lisbeth continued to remain mute as the two women's voices filled the air. One spoke with pure venom, and the other spoke with a strange conversation about what Lisbeth might encounter once she left as if it was a foregone conclusion.

Anyway dear, your mother will be here shortly so we will be going. I wish you all the best on your journey and will pray for your success in your new life. You have a voice given from God use it for if you come back it will surely be wasted." The choir mistress picked up a smaller bag from within the larger one that she picked up and put in the large bottom drawer beside Lisbeth's bed and the two women left.

Lisbeth lay back on the pillows thinking about what they had said. This was exactly the opportunity she had wanted and had been waiting for, of course, she would take it. They hadn't needed to threaten her. An image of Gabriel floated into her mind, and she felt guilt at leaving him. The night before the almost wedding she had realised that she did love him, she had just never let her mind think about it before because she had been so determined to escape the life of a commune wife and mother, with no other purpose than to breed and look after her family.

She felt good, she was healing, and the headaches had lessened to little more than an occasional throbbing in her temple if she sat up to fast or swivelled her neck too fast. She would wait until after she had seen the doctor tomorrow morning and then she would decide what to do and where to go. She sat up slowly and opened the draw. Opening the bag she saw a purse that seemed stuffed with money and a bus ticket that was refundable. Lisbeth had never handled money in her life or seen bus ticket but she read all the details on it, and the money seemed like a lot.

The clothes were colourful and in foreign materials. She felt excitement override her feelings of guilt about leaving Gabriel and Abigail to be happy with each other and quickly closed the draw again. She was going to do it. She was going to leave. She went over the address in a small notebook until it was emblazoned in her mind. Each time that she tried to imagine what it might look like though Gabriel's house and his smiling face telling her that he loved her for who she was, came into her mind.

Searching the top two drawers of her nightstand she came up with paper and a pen and began to write three letters. One for her parents, one for Abigail and the hardest one for Gabriel. The choir mistress had been right, all their lives would be better off without her, and she wrote passionately about why that was the truth of it to each of them.

Her mother had arrived looking worn and tired and reassuring her that she was almost ready for a nap herself when she had finished writing a letter to Abigail, ostensibly because she missed her very much, she encouraged her mother to sleep in the reclining chair at her bedside. Then she stopped writing and looked at her mother.

"Margaret said you were an outsider," she said to see if it were true.

"She had no right to tell you that," her mother said sadly not denying the statement. "When your father was a young man, they would allow the young people of the commune to leave for a year to experience the world and choose for themselves whether to come back or not. So many girls did not come back or were ruined by the world that they stopped that practise and now only young men who request it are allowed some few months out in the world."

"Is that how you met father?" Lisbeth asked interestedly.

"Oh yes. He was such a good and kind man, strong as an ox and very handsome," she said dreamily. "I would have followed him into hell in those days, sometimes I think I did," she gave a sad smile.

"The other women haven't been kind have they mother?" Lisbeth knew the answer.

"Not always but it is of no importance, sometimes we have to follow our hearts. They say that for every heart there is an equal, as a matching half, a soul mate and if you are lucky enough to find it there is nothing you can't endure for a love like that," she smiled. "Your father and I love each other even more now than we did when we were first married. The snide remarks of a few silly women can't take that from me."

Lisbeth remembered that as a child before her coming of age there was always the comfort of loving hugs and softly kissed cheeks and foreheads. She remembered guiding hands in hers and over hers as she learned new skills and knew instinctively why she was so impulsive about unseemly touching now. It was part of who she was, who she had brought up to be by loving parents.

"Mother if I wanted to take a few months, just to see a little bit of the world and maybe visit your family out there would you let me go?" Lisbeth asked tentatively.

"If I knew you were prepared and were going someplace safe," the older woman answered and then listened to her daughter tell her of the visit she had received from Margaret and the choir mistress. "This is what you want?" her mother asked at the end of the tale not questioning the truth of it.

"I do but..." she paused as the thought sprang to her mind, "What if Gabriel is my other half and I am handing him to Selena or Abigail?"

"If he is your soul mate, the two of you will find each other again," her mother answered with certainty. She then looked at the pages her daughter had been writing, "Are those goodbye letters?" she asked softly and saw the tears form in Lisbeth's eyes as she nodded.

"Just a few months, no longer," she got up and went to the bed to hug her daughter fiercely. "Promise me, Liss, you won't go forever without any word to me like I did to my mother," tears escaped her eyes then. She knew if she held her daughter back she would be miserable. She had always had a feeling this day would come, and she was glad she would have the opportunity to say goodbye.

"Well then," she said and stood up sniffing away the tears. "Just remember you asked for this. I am not about to put my daughter on a dirty Greyhound bus on her own. If you are determined to go and see the world, then you should do it properly and safely. I am going to the bathroom I will be back in a few minutes."

Lisbeth was stunned that her mother had taken the idea of her daughters impending flight the way she had. Admittedly in her relief Lisbeth had promised to be gone for a few months only but still the woman had surprised her. She leaned back thinking about all of the revelations this day had brought her.

"No going backwards now," her mother sighed when she returned some time later. "Finish your letters and I will tell you a story about a little princess."

The story was about a girl who was born to a life of wealth and opulence. She was given everything money could buy the best clothes the best schools the best nannies. She had everything but the attention of her parents. She thought they didn't love her, that they doted on her brothers and preferred their friends to her. She started acting out, doing the wrong things with the wrong crowds. Alcohol and drugs were a very real part of her life until she met a common man who was good and kind. He didn't care what are she drove or what parties she went to. He didn't care who she or her parents were. He cared about her and why she would treat herself so badly and let others treat her that way.

"You have lived such a sheltered life with us here in the middle of nowhere I worry for you going out into the world," her mother said softly as Lisbeth struggled to keep her eyes open. "Sleep now," she whispered kissing her daughters cheek and taking the letters from the drawer along with the bag left by Margret and Catherine, which she didn't want to go missing in the chaos that would erupt in the early hours of the morning. She would deal with those two women when she returned. She may have taken all their insults and jibes for herself over the years, but she would not let them mess with her daughter. She was sure this address they had given her was probably for a brothel of some description, but she would find out for herself when she approached the council. There were enough good men there to hear her out regardless of the women's standing in the Assembly.

In the hallway outside the room, she looked up at the big clock at the end of the ward and nodded. It had been so long since she had seen her parents and she wasn't looking forward to this reunion. She went back in and sat in the recliner and waited for the drama to unfold. Hoping that this wouldn't harm her husband's standing in the commune, and she worried over the whole situation as she dozed off knowing it was worth the risk to ensure her daughter's safety.

"Melody!" Lisbeth woke to the cry of a woman who rushed to her bedside and held her face between her hands making her give her own cry of alarm.

"I'm here Kasey, that is my daughter Lisbeth," she said tiredly shaking her head and standing from the recliner.

'She looks so much like you did when..." Kasey looked between Melody and Lisbeth. "Oh darling don't you worry about a thing I am here now, I will get you the best medical care available."

"Where's Daddy?" Melody asked as Kasey smothered Lisbeth in her ample bosom as she hugged the girl tightly.

"He's taking care of the paperwork, we are taking you both back to the city where they have proper doctors," Kasey informed them.

"I'm not coming with you, Kasey. This is my home now, and I won't leave my family," Melody said with conviction.

"I am your family, yet you left me without a backward glance," Kasey said anger creeping into her voice.

"Be honest Kasey, you didn't even know I was gone. Even Daddy didn't notice for the first six months before he sent someone to look for me," she sighed. "I don't want to argue, I made my choice. Now Lisbeth must make her choices. She wants to know you and your world that is the only reason you are here."

"Sweet Melody," an older gentleman said as he came into the room. Lisbeth watched as he picked up her mother and hugged her.

"Put me down Daddy," she complained but Lisbeth could hear the change of tone in her mother's voice to one of affection. Lisbeth watched as a second man entered the room behind her grandfather and approached her bed. Kasey made way for him and stood to the side watching as the man examined her face.

"Fell in the shower did you?" he asked looking into her eyes with a blinding torch.

"Yes, Sir," she answered in a whisper blinking against the bright light and trying to readjust to the dimly lit room again.

"I disagree with your current doctor's diagnosis and believe it would be best to transfer you to a hospital with an MRI machine so we can be sure there is no residual damage," he said officially. "You are over eighteen, so I do not need your parent's permission to move you. If you would sign the release papers, we can be on our way."

Lisbeth looked at her mother as if to ask what she should do. Turning to follow her gaze the officious doctor spoke again. "Officially I was called in for a consult due to ongoing headaches and advised the patient to sign the forms for her transfer against yours and her current doctor's wishes. That way there will be no issues of distrust with the local community groups. Ah, here he is," her doctor arrived in the room with a wheelchair.

"Remember always that I love you, and you must come back to me," Melody said with emotion as she helped her daughter from the bed to the wheelchair and hugged her tightly.

"Come home with us Melody," her father said sadly knowing what her answer would be having had this conversation on two other occasions.

"I can't Daddy, my life is here now, and I am happy," she said quietly moving to hug her father. "Happier than I ever was before coming here with William." She hugged her mother farewell without saying anything. Kasey seemed about to launch into a diatribe about being hurt and rejected by her own flesh and blood as she had done on the two other occasions they had seen each other but closed her mouth firmly and walked from the room her back stiff and her walk purposeful.

"She's changed a great deal since your brother's death, Melody," her father said softly. "Try to give her a chance next time." With that, the small group followed Kasey out to the waiting ambulance. The doctor and Melody stood at the front of the small rural hospital and watched the lights of the ambulance disappear into the night.

"Come and get some sleep," the doctor encouraged. "I will take you home in the morning and explain what happened." They walked inside the now empty, save for the night nurse, building and Melody went back to the room where her daughter had lain still wondering if she had done the right thing and worrying about the fallout for her husband with the council.

"The story is true. I have been concerned. The fault will be mine alone," The doctor smiled. "Can I get you something to help you sleep?"

"No thank you I don't like taking any medication these days," Melody laughed thinking of the days she would have jumped at the offer.

* * * *

Lisbeth or Bliss as her grandparents had named her now sat on a lounge on the front deck of their yacht enjoying the smells of the ocean and the spray that sometimes rode on the wind up to mist over her. The revelation that her grandparents were wealthy was nothing compared to the voice and music of her grandmother that pumped through her ears via a player and earphones.

While not exactly backwards at the commune like their Amish brethren they were not encouraged to use or interact with the limited technology they had there particularly the girls of the commune. In the last few weeks, she had discovered computers and tablets and Android phones and a wealth of music that did not sing the praise of God. Strangest of all she found that Kasey was a famous singer. It was strange sort of music that interspersed singing with the warbling voice of a yodeller. Some she admitted wasn't so bad, and she sang along as the music pumped into her ears.

"Yodelay he yodeloh oh;

You rock my world

Yodelay he yodeloh oh

When I grow up, I wanna be your girl."

"You've got quite a voice," Eric, her grandfather interrupted her thoughts. "When you said you liked to sing you made it sound like a pleasant pastime like singing in the shower or the car."

"I've only ever sung in the Assemblies with the choir. I did get a couple of solos, though," she smiled. "I love singing more than most anything," she admitted.

"I have an idea, let's find Kasey," Eric said and held out his hand to her. Since her arrival in their lives Bliss as they called her had brought both his wife and himself nothing but Joy. The sheer look of wonder and gratitude as she discovered all the things they took for granted in their everyday lives for the first time. If singing was what made her happy, then he would give her every opportunity to explore that talent.

They wandered into the cabin and found Kasey thumbing through a collection of sheet music with her guitar by her side. Looking up as her husband led her granddaughter into the room she couldn't help but smile. The relationship that was quickly growing between them was more than she could have expected. Melody had told the girl nothing of her grandparents and without the baggage of past wrongs and guilt to weigh her down Kasey was making the most of every moment they shared.

"I have a surprise for you, Darling," Eric smiled and went to the stereo in the corner and pulled out a keyboard. "This girl said she liked to sing, but she never told us how good she was. Listen to this," he said and typed a few keys then played an instrumental track of the song she had just been singing along with. Lisbeth immediate got stage fright as her grandmother looked at her expectantly.

"I can't sing your song," Lisbeth said quietly dropping her head in embarrassment. "I was just singing along to the music on my player. I'm sorry." She blushed deeply.

"Nonsense we can sing it together," Kasey encouraged picking up the tune as it got to the chorus.

"Yodelay he yodeloh oh;

You rock my world

Yodelay he yodeloh oh

When I grow up, I wanna be your girl."

She continued to sing lifting Lisbeth's chin and smiling encouraging as the next verse started.