Fallen Ch. 16

"I..."

"Tell me." Without him even realising it I have let go of his wrists and put my arms around him, drawing him close. He is just about the same height as me and my vision is dominated by the most incredible shade of blue.

"No..." he whispers, struggling again, but it is weak and uncertain.

"Star, you are the most beautiful boy I have ever laid eyes on. When I saw you in the bar, I watched you all night. I wanted to touch you, to taste you, but for the first time ever I was afraid. I was afraid I would drive you away, that I would lose you."

"You kidnapped me." He tries to rally but there is no real anger in his voice now.

"I couldn't help myself. I couldn't let you go."

"You almost killed me."

"It was the biggest mistake of my life."

"You... you drugged me, kidnapped me, brought me here and had sex with me." There is a flash in his eyes but I am ready.

"Can you really tell me that you didn't want it, that you didn't like it?"

"I... no I... I didn't want it."

"Really? When you were biting me, when you were growling like an animal, did you really want it to stop?"

"I..."

"Tell me the truth, Star. Isn't it the very fact that you didn't hate it; that you wanted me, wanted it, that's made you so angry? Isn't it the fact that everything that has happened to you since I passed you the JD in the bar turned you on, that has made you hate me?"

"I..."

"Tell me, Star." He shakes his head, a look of desperation coming into his eyes. "Tell me," I command

Something snaps behind his eyes and he sags, lowering his head, all the fight leaking out of him. "Yes," he whispers.

I lift his face with my fingers and stare into his eyes, moving my hand to cup his cheek. "I promised I would not take you unless you asked me to, that I would not lay a hand on you unless you wanted it." He swallows noisily. "If you want me to walk away, right now, I will. If you want me to never speak to you again, I will. If you want me to let you go then I will."

"Why?"

"You said yourself that there is something about Bridge that even though you haven't known him for long makes you absolutely sure that you love him and will never stop loving him. I felt that the first moment I looked into your eyes. I love you, Star. I would live or die for you and I can't bear it a moment longer. Being close to you, seeing your smile, your eyes, smelling your scent, hearing your voice is torment. I would rather release you and never see you again than to have to live with you, seeing you every day and not being able to be with you."

"Do you mean it?" he asks as if he really can't believe he's saying it. "Do you really love me?"

"With all my heart."

There are tears in his eyes and his jaw is trembling where he has clenched his teeth. "I don't love you. I... hate you."

"Are you sure?" Still holding his face with my hand I move closer.

"Yes, I... I don't... I don't..." He keeps on saying it right up until our lips meet and then he throws his arms around me and pulls me close, kissing me as I have never been kissed before.

There is desperation in the kiss and I can feel his heart thudding against my chest. The smell of his blood is intoxicating and I want him... oh Hel I want him.

"Not here." I manage to gasp between kisses. "Bridge... not here."

Panting, Star lifts his head and looks down at Bridge, who is sleeping peacefully. He nods and comes willingly when I take his hand and lead him out of the room.