Family Thanksgiving MisadventuresbyBobby_3111©
(This is a work of fiction)
There is a lot to be said for thanksgiving. I mean it's the one holiday out of the year people come together, cook good food, try to be nice to one another and no one wants or expects anything from anyone except maybe a good meal. At least that's the myth behind it; the story of my family is somewhat different.
The Holidays around my house are a somewhat strange affair. It usually starts with my dad John buying all kinds of weird shit to put up in the yard. This thanksgiving its plastic turkeys and small Elmer Fudd size statues dressed as pilgrims, about a dozen of each. From what my mother and my sisters tell me he didn't really start it till I came along, some kind of turning over a new leaf type of deal. Whatever the reason behind it, it seems like every year since as long as I can remember he's been putting stuff up and then he's constantly at war with the neighborhood kids.
When I was little it was rocks, and as the years progressed it's been a variety of objects and different forms of vandalism. It's almost as if its target practice for anyone with a strong arm or trying to improve their shooting skills. Slingshots, baseballs, kickballs, and just this year, paintballs, it's become almost a kind of a tradition. I can almost visualize it in my head, other dad's around the block saying to their sons "Don't forget to practice for next season, you've got a perfect target gallery across the street, do me proud boy!" And off they go to wreak havoc on our grass destroying my Dad's plastic display of the holiday. But that's just one part, on to the rest.
My Mom Janice and my sisters, Tiffany and Karen, on the other hand are always busy looking for a new way to cook. That's not to say they are kitchen type's, far from it, but they still try and last year it wasn't so bad, at least no one lost a tooth from weird objects floating in the gravy (unlike a few years ago). I'm just hoping it's edible, if not I hear the Chinese place is open down the street, thank god for chicken lo mien.
My name is David and being the youngest at 18 is somewhat a disadvantage, my two older sisters for one. Growing up was a pain in the ass and now with them home for the holidays for a whole 2 months (you would think they would go have families of their own instead of freeloading off our parents) I can only imagine the remarks that will be incoming. Mainly about my love life (they still think I'm a virgin, at 6'2", 185 lbs of muscle, with brown hair and green eyes I have had quite a few sexual adventures), what my future prospects will be (working at the pizza place), and of course how I'm not going to get into any 4 year college (I've already been taking classes at the local community college).
So here I sit, up in my bedroom, browsing the net, listening to some music as my mind turns over all the wonderful holiday events yet to unfold.
'Happy fucking Thanksgiving' I say to myself.
Ya gotta wonder just how in the hell people come up with this shit. I'm standing out in the backyard, freezing my ass off (35 degrees, no snow yet though thank god) and looking at my dad trying to set up a deep-turkey-fryer (one of those ya see on infomercials). He's got a propane tank and 5 gallons of peanut oil sitting there while he's putting the hoses on the right valves while reading the instructions.
My Dad is an intimidating guy, big hands, big frame, black hair, green eyes and 6'3" tall. At least to strangers, but once ya get to know him you realize he's a pretty nice guy, at least to everyone that doesn't deface his front lawn. I guess that's why Mom fell for him, that and the fact that he keeps himself in shape. It's almost a miracle at 45 he hasn't become one of the potbelly-pro's of middle age (considering he works in an office). I guess the gym membership he's had for years has helped, strange.
Now my Dad has a funny way of looking at things, he naturally assumes that since I'm his son I will do everything he does if I see him and help him do it. In a few ways he would be correct (for instance changing the carburetor on an old '78 pickup, well there's only one right way to do it) but in some cases we just don't see things eye to eye. This whole frying the turkey deal is one of them, I'd be happy with something non-food poisoning from the oven, but to Dad it's something new for the holiday so it's important to him.
Finally he set the pot on the burner and stood up looking over at me after getting the hose attached and tinkering with the burner dial.
"Ok David, turn on the gas."
I walk over and turn the valve and hear the gas hissing out below the pot. Mt dad starts fidgeting with the dial on the hose and the hissing stops.
Getting out his matches he bends down to look under the pot at the burner before he lights it.
"Dad..." I say to get his attention.
"What?" he asks, still looking at the burner while getting a match out, about to strike it.
"You really shouldn't be that close when you light it" I said.
"No it'll be ok son, as soon as the gas comes on it will light, trust me." He said on one elbow thumbing the switch to turn on the gas and then lighting a match.
I had already reached into my pocket and dialed 911 and held my thumb on the send button, just hoping I would be able to press it before flames engulfed us both.
"Dad, you really shouldn't be that close." I said again, trying to keep him from an ER visit today.
"Hush David, your old man knows what he's doing." He said just as he was putting a match to the burner.
One big whoosh later (it had engulfed his head but thankfully it didn't catch) he was getting up and slightly shaken looked over at me with a grin.
"Told ya it would work boy." He said still grinning.
I just shook my head and activated my camera phone, pointed it at him and snapped a picture. Giving it to him he just looked at it for a minute then felt around on his face, in particular where his mustache used to be, or what was left of it (along with part of his eyebrows).
"Well, fuck it, I been meaning to shave it off anyway." He said with a dismissive wave of his hand as he handed the phone back to me.
Taking the phone back I slipped it back into my pocket as he picked up the oil and started pouring it into the pot.
Halfway full he stopped and put the oil back down and put the lid on. Asking him why he did that he said so the oil will heat up faster. Which kind of confused me, as I thought this way just him putting it together and doing a test run, but apparently he was getting it ready to cook.
Trying to be diplomatic with my words (he had almost set himself on fire once already) I tried a new approach.
"We need to save the gas don't we Dad? We know it will cook, why not wait for tomorrow before we crank it up full blast eh?"
"No, no, I'm gonna cook one today, Bob at work says deep-fried turkey is delicious and I want to try some today." He said picking up his few tools on the ground.
"How many turkeys did Mom buy?" I asked confused. I had gone with her to do the shopping because she always needs help unloading the car and knows I like to avoid it if I can. So she drags me to and from the grocery store with her so she can make sure I help. I knew she had only bought one three days ago.
"She only bought one but I'm gonna get another one, you stay here and watch the burner, shut it off if you have any trouble." He said as he started walking towards the garage door.
Looking at my Dad in disbelief as he went into the garage I reached down and turn off the burner just as I hear his old pick up crank up and start to back out of the driveway. No way am I standing out here for over an hour while he tries to wade through the holiday shoppers at the grocery store (not to mention the only store that would still have turkeys is 30 miles away).
Walking back inside through the garage it felt good to have heat on my skin again, it had already turned slightly chapped from the dry wind, typical for a winter in Colorado.
Walking into the kitchen from the garage I see my Mom and my sisters busy looking over different recipe books and commenting on different ones they would like to try as I stand there and take off my sweat shirt.
The women looking up at hearing me enter and seeing me remove my shirt started giggling.
Now I gotta say my mother is one hot lady at 42 years old. Ever since I can remember I have been fascinated by her tits, big 38 DD's, there's just nothing better than big tits, the fact that they were on my mother made them even more desirable. With shoulder length brown hair and laughing brown eyes standing at 5'1" she was the picture of a housewife in her floral print dress.
My sisters on the other hand didn't have much in the cleavage department; I guess it must be a youth thing.
Karen, the oldest at 22, was only 5' tall and had smallish b-size tits, but she did have mom's hair and eyes and she was very cute. Today she had her hair in a braid that went all the way to the small of her back.
And Tiffany, 21, standing at 5'5", strangely enough, is a blonde (it must be from our grandparents, gramma Edna has a blonde hair), she only has mom's eyes and certainly doesn't have her tits, Tiff is only an A cup, but to her credit (and I hate to admit this) she does have an ass on her and keeps her hair in a short pixie cut that makes her look really hot. But the main thing I disliked about was her mouth, it wasn't the form, but the way she used it.
"Sorry little bro we don't have any ones, you might wanna check down the street, Mrs. Miller and her daughter love male strippers so we hear." She said laughing.
My Mom and Karen both started laughing at that, what was so damn funny I have no idea, must be a woman thing I thought.
"Sorry sis, I don't think they like chest hair, but from what I hear you love it, so it's a freebie this time." I said grinning, making a subtle reference to her ex, the hairy guy that looked like he belonged on a wild kingdom re-run.
At that Mom and Karen laughed harder and even Tiff laughed a bit at that one, but I could tell from the way she glared that she didn't like it all that much, she was just trying to avoid embarrassment.
Grinning, I started up the stairs to my room when suddenly I hear Dad's pick up in the driveway.
What the hell? I thought as I walked back down and saw him coming to the front door.
Shit I said to myself as I race to the backdoor in the kitchen with my mother asking me what's wrong. Stopping to pull the sweat shirt over my head I quickly explain that dad asked me to watch the burner for him while he went to the grocery store.
Shrugging into it just as my dad walks into the kitchen I start to open the door to go back out when he stops me.
"David, your gonna have to go, I gotta stay here with the burner, gotta make sure it doesn't catch anything on fire." He said kind of half turned towards the stairs.
My Mom looking over noticed a bit of soot on the side of her husband's head.
"Why can't you just go John? And what is that on your face?"
John still looking away mumbles something about needing to shower and shave and trudges up the stairs.
Mom looked over to me and asked what was that all about.
Knowing when to keep my mouth shut (he pays my tuition after all) I just shrug my shoulders and head outside to take the trip to supermarket hell.
Finally getting back after close to two hours of being gone (it was even worse than I had thought, there was actually a cat-fight in the parking lot, two very old ladies bashing each other with bags, I actually saw someone recording it with a phone, gotta be on YouTube by now) the lines were hell and the only turkeys they had where almost too big, I just hope dad would be happy with this one. 12 pounds is a lot, but oh well, it's all they had.
Pulling into the driveway I noticed 2 new colors on the Elmer Pilgrims on our front yard, a nice shade of pink and a very metallic looking green. Dad wouldn't happy with that, but he'll get over it eventually.
Grabbing the turkey and the keys I head back into the kitchen just as Mom and Karen were glazing some donuts. Setting down Big-Bird I asked if they were ready. No my mom replied I had to wait till they were cool.
Shrugging in disappointment I head back out the door to see if Dad is in the backyard. Going out the garage door I see him sitting in one of the lawn chairs sipping on a beer as he watched the burner slightly flaming out from the side of the pot.
"Dad I'm back." I call out to him.
"Ok, take the turkey out and put it in some warm water for me in the sink." He said turning to look at me.
Heading back in Mom was placing the donuts over on the counter to cool while Karen was bending over to check the oven giving me a great view of her ass (which was almost as perfect as Tiffany's). Stopping to stare as her ass swayed slightly under the skin tight sweats she wore I swear she wasn't wearing any underwear, no panty lines were visible that I could tell.
"Be careful David, Karen hasn't gotten laid in months." Mom said suddenly.
Startled I look over at Mom as she stood there leaning against the counter grinning at me.
Karen standing up and looking at me, grinning herself now, had my face flaming, I mumbled to Karen that Dad wanted them to put the turkey into the sink with warm water to help it thaw then in a dignified manner strode to the stairs.
Just as I started up to my room I heard my sister giggling and my mother's voice.
"You have a nice ass too David." She called out laughing.
Hunching my shoulders at their laughter I climbed the stairs.
Entering my room I found Tiffany on my computer, browsing around looking at her usual garbage. Celebrity sites giving all kinds of star rumors and politic scandal bullshit. I could have saved her the trouble and just told her all celebrities fuck each other till they get tired then move on and all politicians are crooks and sex-offenders, wonderful role models. But of course she never listens; after all, I'm just the little brother.
"What are you doing Tiff?" I asked already knowing the answer.
"Just reading up on what celebs are doing, I'm gonna be on here one day so I need to know what to avoid." She said not even turning around.
"What's wrong with your laptop?"
"The Wi-Fi modem is horrible for this area and you have the only dsl connection in the house except for dad's computer and he needs it for work."
"Well you can look up all the star bullshit on your laptop, I don't care how slow it is, get off mine." I said seeing what she was looking at now.
"I'll be off in a few minutes." She said waving her hand at me dismissively.
"Did you hear what I said?" I said angrily.
"Fine!" She said turning around and getting up glaring at me, I thought she was gonna slap me there for a second, then she just stormed out.
As I watched her leave I couldn't help but notice how nicely the tight jeans show off her ass.
And of course she turns around to give me one last comment and catches me staring.
Looking up at her just as she was about to speak I turn red, knowing she had caught me and knowing she was going to take advantage of it.
Grinning now she lays in.
"So you like my ass do you David?" She asks teasingly.
I kept silent, just looking her in the eyes, keeping them locked there.
Turning around she pulled the back of her jeans down slightly to show me the top of her panties.
"Oh look, you're staring again, poor little brother, never seen one of these before have you?" She said in her same teasing tone.
With a great effort I turned away from that marvelous ass and started taking my shoes off. Hoping it would piss her off and she would leave.
"Poor little David doesn't want to play anymore, too bad, I was feeling like taking these jeans off." She sighed as she pulled up on the back of her jeans and as I watched her walk across the hallway to her room and after looking back and giving me a wink shut the door.
Getting up I angrily shut the door to my room and take off the sweat shirt and toss it into a corner, laying back on my bed I put my headphones on and listen to some music from my I-pod as I stare up at the ceiling thinking about Tiff's perfect ass while slowly getting a hard on.
After a minute I can't stand it anymore and get up and take my jeans and boxer-briefs off and lie back down and slowly start to stroke my cock, thinking of that fabulous ass on my sister while listening to some alternative.
With my eyes closed, it wasn't long before my fantasy was in full swing and I started stroking faster and faster, feeling the cum boiling in my balls, begging for release. A few strokes more and I started shooting straight up into the air, some of it landing on my stomach, some landing on the sheets. My orgasm lasted for about 30 seconds, then finally I was done, taking my left hand (my right was a mess) I unplug the phones from my ears and hear giggling. Knowing damn well it was my sister I raise my head up to a shock.
There stood Mom, Karen and Tiffany all giggling at me in my open doorway and commenting on the quantity of how much sperm I produced.
"Well did you girls like the show?" I asked, slightly offended at the intrusion.
"We certainly did David, my little boy isn't so little anymore." Mom said still giggling and staring at my 9" cock.
"Yes he certainly has grown hasn't he Tiff." Karen said smiling at me.
Tiff just licked her lips and agreed with Karen.
Still standing there I just give them a frank look. Hopefully they would take the hint and leave so I could at least clean up.
Karen, still staring at me asked our mother.
"Well Mom I think we should help David clean up, after all it's Tiffany's fault he's in this mess."
"I didn't make him jerk off, and I didn't help, although I would have liked to." Tiffany said still staring at the mess I made on my stomach.
"Hey!" I almost yelled.
"Do you all mind getting out of here so I can get cleaned up? And stop all the cock-teasing, its damned annoying." I said, feeling life start to return to halfway deflated member, it slowly starting to harden again in my hand. Staring at 3 beautiful women will do that to a man.
At this the women all stopped talking and looked dead at me like 3 eagles looking at prey, they weren't exactly glaring but it was close.
Mom was the first to speak.
"Cock-teases are we?" She said slightly above a whisper.
Hearing that tone I knew she was pissed, but at the moment, so was I, this was my room and they were standing there staring at me like I was some kind of a freak show.
"Yes, now leave and let me get cleaned up... please." I added the please so as to try to smooth over my harsher words moments earlier.
Mom didn't say anything at first then apparently she made up her mind.
Walking into the room with Tiff and Karen trailing her she shut the door and started undoing the buttons on her dress. Tiff and Karen following her lead did the same to my utter disbelief and shock.
When the last button was undone and the last piece of clothing was removed I was laying, cock in hand, staring at 3 very beautiful naked women, all eyeing me like I was a piece of meat they meant to get a bite out of if it was the last thing they did.
Mom strode over to the bed, climbed on between my legs and leaned down close to my ear and whispered.
"I'll show you cock-tease little man." And suddenly shoved my hand out of the way and started licking my stomach clean. Karen and Tiff, one on each side started doing the same.
This was a dream I thought, I'll wake up in a couple minutes to realize I had fallen asleep jerking off, or passed out from blood pressure, no fucking way this could be happening. I started to pinch myself with my right hand when Karen grabbed it and started licking it clean.