Fear and Euphoria

"Shush, stay in bed and sleep," said Kari the next morning. "I'm going to shower and order breakfast." She kissed my hand, smiled and walked away and all I could think was; she's awesome!

When I finally got my eyes open and rolled out of bed, she was on the phone with room service and I couldn't resist playing while she tried to give the order. She squirmed slightly when my hands touched her shoulders and slightly more when they pulled off her towel.

"Lightly scrambled," she said changing tone in midsentence as I kissed her neck and shoulders. "Yes, and orange ----"

She gasped as my kisses moved down her spine. "Uh, I mean, yes, orange juice."

Her beautiful ass was warm and inviting and I couldn't resist. "Yes, that'll be it. Thanks," she said hanging up the phone as my tongue moved down the valley between her cheeks.

"Kimmy...?" she squealed with a laugh while turning to back away. "No, no, no, no, no..., you're not going to get me all worked up now. Take your shower so we can eat. I want to explain some things." When I straightened up, she hugged me. "God you're beautiful. I really hope you don't hate me."

"Hate you..., for what?"

"Shower first. Then I'll tell you everything."

During my shower, I wondered, or more accurately worried, about what horrible thing she was going to tell me but, when I came out wrapped in a towel, the table was set with bacon, eggs, coffee and juice. "Wow, that looks delicious," I said suddenly realizing how hungry I was.

She grinned and handed me a rather short hotel robe. "I'm afraid we wrinkled your clothes pretty badly so I sent them out for pressing."

The robe barely covered my butt and left a bit of me dangling below it in front. We both looked down for a second and laughed.

"Let's sit down Kim. I seem to want you in my mouth more than those eggs but we have to talk a little first."

"Okay," I said as I pulled out her chair. "What do you want to talk about..., and what was that hate me thing you said before?"

"Here, let me fix your blonde and sweet coffee. And I promise not to suck your fingers this time..., well..., not yet anyway."

The morning sun backlit her golden hair and framed those bright blue eyes in a portrait the masters would envy but I couldn't lose myself in her beauty. It was time to talk. "Okay, now I'm nervous. What did you want to tell me?"

Her face reddened slightly as she started her story. "Kim, I just want you to know about me. My past is..., well..., I've lived through hell."

"Ha, I can relate to that! Oh, sorry for interrupting, please continue."

She chuckled and relaxed a little. "The reason I said I never do this is because I only date women. I thought I had become a lesbian but you...," she looked at me and laughed, "you did something to me last night that I've never felt before and I hope you don't hate me for what I'm about to tell you. So please listen and, if you don't want to ever see me again, I'll understand."

The idea of her being a lesbian stunned me but, deep inside, it also excited me and I must have looked as confused as I felt.

"Just give me a chance to explain, okay?" I nodded and she took a long breath. "I was in a bad marriage, a really bad one and, after I got away from him, I dated for a while and discovered that the men who were attracted to me were generally disgusting lying pigs so I spent my time with the girls. One night, a good friend sort of seduced me into having sex with her. And I liked it. After that, I started dating women so I wouldn't have to deal with hairy, sweaty, obnoxious men."

She took a drink of juice and fanned her face with her hand. I sat silent, listening. "Whew, there, I said it. Do you hate me for being..., well..., I don't really know if I'm a lesbian or not but, that's what I've done. Do you hate me?"

I reached across the table and held both her hands. "Kari, you are the most beautiful girl I've ever met and, if I had to, I'd be a lesbian just to be with you."

Her eyes welled up with tears. "Really...? But you've only just met me. How do you know----"

This time it was my finger to her lips. "Shush, maybe I don't really know, but right now, I do feel that way and I want to get to know you. Besides, how do you know you won't hate me tomorrow? I'm certainly not the tall dark handsome male model type, and I'm far from being rich!"

She leaned back and sighed. "Kim, do you have any idea how scared I am about ever making love with anyone again? I'm petrified!"

"Why?" I asked with a nervous laugh.

"Because, last night was so absolutely incredible that I'm afraid it'll never happen again!"

"There is an easy way to find out you know." She laughed and squeezed my hands.

We never did finish breakfast that morning and once again, I had to hold and cuddle her until she came down from her sexual high but I loved doing it and I loved being the one who could give such intense pleasure.

Later, I was in the bedroom getting dressed when I heard her say, "I like to be the boy". She was in the bathroom twenty feet away and hadn't spoken a word but, somehow, I heard her thoughts. I froze for a second. Did I actually hear her say that? But then, I passed it off as just another freaky notion in my confused and twisted mind.

A few minutes later, she hugged me and said, "I have to go to the office for an hour or so. Would you like to come with me?"

"That could be interesting but are you sure you want me there with you?"

"Why wouldn't I?" she asked with a laugh. "You said you wanted to know me better."

"Well, I do but I don't want to embarrass you in front of your friends."

"Kimmy..., you're not going to embarrass me at all. Besides, you might like my business."

"Okay, um, what kind of business is it?"

"I'll show you. It'll be a surprise."

When the valet brought my car around, Kari motioned me toward the driver's side and said, "Let's pick up my car, drop yours off and go to the office. And..., I'll let you drive today."

At the end of the hotel driveway, I stopped. "Where am I going?"

"Ha!" she laughed. "You don't remember how we got here from the hotel you're playing at?"

"I was distracted last night."

"So was I. Turn left."

"You had a car last night?"

"Uh-huh. But I wanted to be with you."

I smiled and started down that twisting road to get her car, and what a car it was!

"It's the black Mercedes SLR," she said to the valet when he took my car to the parking area. "Now where's that ticket," she muttered searching for the errant piece of paper. "Oooo, sometimes I hate purses! I know I've got it here somewhere."

With a slight smile, the valet said, "No problem Ma'am, I know the car. Every valet here does. It's the only McLaren Roadster we've ever seen. Take your time finding the ticket and I'll bring it round."

"McLaren..., I thought you said it was a Mercedes?"

"It is. He was talking about the model. You don't know much about cars do you? Ah-ha!" she exclaimed holding up the ticket.

"Some," I said wanting to sound not too dumb. "What's so special about a McLaren?"

"Tell you what.... I'll let you drive it. Then you'll know. I was on a waiting list and it took over a year to have it delivered. It's a special version."

"That sounds expensive!"

"It was but it was a super special birthday present I bought myself.

"Speaking of birthdays, would it be rude if I asked how old you are?"

She laughed. "Ooooo..., aren't you supposed to never ask a lady her age?"

"Oh ---- yeah ---- right..., sorry."

"I just turned thirty. I hope that's not too old for you but..., well..., does that bother you?"

"Absolutely not," I said as I stared into her eyes. "I don't care what the number is."

She hugged me and said, "Thanks. You don't know how much better that makes me feel. Oh good, here comes my car now."

She held the driver's door and motioned for me to get in but, when I sunk into that luxurious seat, my feet didn't reach the pedals. She bent over the door to put my hand on the seat buttons and I noticed the attendant standing behind her getting very excited. I wasn't sure what she had on under that short skirt but his pants were bulging and his face was getting red. With a kiss on my cheek, she whispered, "These should get you situated. Just put it wherever it's comfortable." Then she went round and got in the other side.

Once I could reach the pedals and see out the mirrors, I leaned over and whispered, "You made me comfortable but the valet is probably going to have to take a short break. Do you always tease men like that?"

"Only when I'm happy, come on, let's go."

I barely touched the gas pedal and we took off like a shot. "Easy Kimmy, don't let her get away from you," she said with a laugh. "I told you it was special but you'll get used to it. I can tell. You, uh-hmm, drive very well."

"Ha! Yeah, that was a really dumb comment I made last night, wasn't it."

"It wasn't dumb. You were just nervous, almost as nervous as I was. Turn here."

"You..., nervous..., I doubt that!"

"Oh, I've just learned how to hide it a little better than you." I glanced at her, questioning that statement. "Don't believe me huh? You'll see."

The car was a dream to drive and soon, we were back in the city. "Pull into the garage. The entrance is just there." She directed me to an oversized parking spot with a sign that said, Reserved - Euphoria - CEO.

I tried to turn the engine off but couldn't figure out how. "Where's the key?"

"No key, just push that button." We got out and I asked about locking it. "Don't worry," she said, "it'll do it all by itself."

"Do you have the keys?"

"No key, remember? Just this little control thingy here." She held out a small rectangular device. "If I walk away, the car locks itself and when I get close to it, it unlocks. Neat, huh...?"

"Cool! What happens if you lose this little..., what is it, a remote control?"

"Then I just make a phone call."

"Wow, that's really cool. What a car!"

"Told you you'd like it...!"

We took an elevator to the top floor and got out in the lobby of a beautifully decorated and very expensive looking day spa for women. Gold backlit lettering on the wall above the receptionist's desk spelled out, "Euphoria" and several open doorways led to various facilities. While I gawked at the decor, the receptionist handed Kari several notes. "I have to make a few calls so, let's get you a tour."

We walked down a hall to an office where a very attractive blonde woman looked up and said, "Hi Kari! What's up today?"

"Hi Ginger, this is Kim. Would you give him a full tour while I try to catch up please?"

She got up and shook my hand. "Sure, love to, pleasure to meet you Kim."

Kari gave me a quick kiss, made a little purring sound and said, "I won't be long."

"Well Kim," said Ginger, "I'm glad to meet the one person who made Kari take a little time off!"

"Why..., is that unusual?"

"It sure is! All she's done for the past few years is work. I don't think she's taken more than an hour for herself." Then she looked at me for a moment as if studying something. "Let me show you our spa Kim. It's pretty amazing!"

We walked by a sign that said, "Enhancing the Feminine Side of Life," and past rooms equipped to deliver every imaginable kind of beauty treatment for women of all ages. "We make people beautiful," she said while pointing out various services. "And, we're medically certified."

"Wow, great business, what does Kari do here? The sign said CEO on the parking space we pulled into."

"Oh..., you don't know?"

"No, she said it would be a surprise."

"Ha! That's Kari all right, never bragging about anything. She owns this place and three others like it."

"Owns it..., really? Wow, she never said!"

"How do you feel about dating such a woman..., intimidating isn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I don't know anything at all about this kind of business. I'd probably sound like a real dodo if we ever talked about it."

Ginger looked at me with a thoughtful expression and smiled. "Let's go back to my office and wait for Kari."

I was still gawking at all the artwork and posters as we traversed the entire top floor and Ginger kept silent until we entered her private office. She closed the door and asked if I wanted something to drink.

"Water if you have it," I said when I saw the fully stocked bar.

"Kim," Ginger began after handing me a bottle, "Kari told me to tell you all about her but frankly, I'm hesitant. I've been protecting her for ten years and you seem so young. Do you mind if I ask a few questions?"

"She told you to tell me about her?"

"Um-hmm, but first ----"

"Oh yeah, questions, sure, go ahead."

"Everything we say in here is confidential so, tell me, do you think I'm attractive?"

"Well, yeah, you're beautiful!"

"Would you like to have sex with me?"

That was a frequent question I got from the sorority girls but this time, my answer was totally different. "Look, you are beautiful, and if you had asked me two days ago, I would've jumped at the chance but not today."

"Why not...? I'll turn on the privacy light and we won't be bothered."

"It's not that. It's just..., I'm, uh, look, I'm just not interested in anyone else right now. And I thought you were Kari's friend!"

"How do you feel about her?"

"She's great!"

"No..., I mean how do you feel? You just refused an opportunity that most men, or boys, would jump at so you must feel something!"

"That's a little personal isn't it?" Ginger's face became expressionless as she stared at me, waiting. "How Kari and I feel about each other is...," I couldn't help but smile as I thought about her. "Well, that's between us. Besides, I've only known her since yesterday."

"Did you have sex with her?"

That brazen question shocked me. I stood up and blustered, "Okay, that's enough. I'm not going to sit here while you denigrate the girl I..., I mean, denigrate Kari."

I started toward the door but Ginger said, "Stop, don't leave...! Sorry I started off so fast but she is my friend." It was then I noticed the diplomas hanging on the wall. 'Doctor of Psychiatry', said one and the rest were 'BA's, 'MBA's and 'Board Certified'. I stopped, put a hand on my mouth and turned toward her.

"Oh boy..., was that sneaky! You were testing me weren't you?"

She smiled. "Yes, but I had a good reason."

"What..., did Kari ask you to find out if I was nuts or something?"

"No. Come on Kim, sit down and I'll tell you everything. Okay...? Truce...?"

"Okay, truce," I mumbled and, in a serious voice, Ginger began Kari's story.

"When she was married, she suffered frequent severe beatings and eventually had to have major surgery. After she recovered, she went back to school to finish her graduate degree and dated a few guys but always felt inadequate and stayed pretty much alone. That's when I met her. She came to see me for therapy but, as I got to know her, she became my best friend."

When she said best friend, my eyes widened. "Are you the one that ----"

"Yes, I'm the first woman she ever had sex with."

"Whew! Some therapy...!"

"Not therapy Kim, I dropped her as a patient before that. I felt she needed something I couldn't give as a doctor so I did it as her friend. I know she told you so I'm not giving away any secrets."

Talking to a psychiatrist about Kari was a bit overwhelming so I listened intently to every word.

"I spoke with her on the phone this morning and she told me to tell you about her. She thinks you might hate her because she's not the average typical woman but, I get the idea that you're not the average typical boy either."

"Did she tell you to psychoanalyze me too?"

"No, that was my idea. She just wanted you to know about her so, if you left, she wouldn't have to face the rejection. Sorry, but I had to learn a little bit about you first. I still protect her and she is still my best friend."

She went on to tell me how Kari had helped a doctor patent a new cosmetic procedure and used the money from licensing it to start Euphoria. Taking charge of her own life and helping other women became an obsession that occupied her every waking moment and, except for a few meaningless lesbian trysts, she rarely dated and felt empty, alone and unloved.

"I know how that feels. It's horrible!"

"I believe you do know," she said with her serious doctor expression, "and I think you and Kari have a great deal in common. By the way, do you have anyone special in your life?"

"Me...? Ha! After my mother died, my father ignored me. I was never the football star he wanted and I don't think we've spoken ten words in the last ten years."

"Any girlfriends...?"

I smiled. "Right now, one...!"

"What's she like?"

I grinned and said, "You tell me!"

Her serious expression broke into a laugh. "Ah, you got me. Of course, Kari...!"

"So, when's she going to be done?"

"Anxious to get out huh...? Okay, I'll call her."

"No, no, don't disturb her if she's got things to do. I was just wondering."

She took her hand off the phone and smiled. "And you're considerate too!"

"I just..., she's probably busy and I don't want to interrupt her or be a burden."

She put her elbows on the desk, her chin on her hands and said, "Have you ever heard about insecurity and low self esteem?"

"Yeah, I've heard of it but I ----"

Suddenly, her phone rang. "Oh I think so," I heard her say to the caller. "It went well! Sure, that'll be fine." Then she hung up. "Kim, I'd like to talk a little more when we have the chance. Are you up for it?"

"Want to see if I'm crazy huh? Sure but I don't have the money to pay what you must charge."

"Money's not a problem and I'm not the enemy. We'll set it up. Kari will let you know when. Okay?" Then she opened the door.

A few seconds later, Kari came in. "So, how did the tour go?" she asked looking a little nervous. Then she looked at me with an even more nervous expression. "And..., you're still here...."

I remembered what Ginger said about Kari not wanting to face rejection so I grabbed her hands and kissed her. "Yes, I am still here. Can I take you to dinner?"

She glanced at Ginger who held out a 'thumbs-up' gesture and let out a long sigh of relief. "Absolutely, where would you like to go?"

I got up on my tip-toes and whispered, "Anywhere as long as we can be together."

Her face lit up. "Okay but I'm driving this time! Thanks Ginger. I appreciate it."

I shook Ginger's hand and whispered, "Thanks from me too. I think Kari's got a good friend."

She drove to a very expensive restaurant and I tried to sneak a look in my wallet as we were walking in but she caught me. "Don't worry about the bill. I've got it."

"But ----"

"Don't worry, I've got enough money."

"Oh, yeah, Ginger told me. I guess you've got enough money for anything you want."

"Does that bother you?"

"Not really but I wanted to take you."

"Money isn't everything!"

"No, but it sure helps things a lot."

"Kim, having enough money may make things easier but it doesn't fill the hole in your heart. Besides, it's no good unless you do something worthwhile with it."

I took a deep breath and grinned. "Okay, I'm completely in your hands."

After a delightful dinner, we went to the hotel where I was playing and later that night, I spent several more hours learning how to please the girl of my dreams. For me, the world had just become a much better place.