Fear, Confusion...Love? Ch. 02

A week on from his attack in the alley way, Mark hadn't been out of the house. As far as he could see, his life was over. The money that he'd been saving was gone and so had his plans of travelling, his mother was on his case about him not leaving the house, he'd been orally raped by a weirdo mugger in an alley and, all of a sudden, he'd found himself attracted to a man he'd met once. He wasn't even fucking gay! He'd never thought about being with a man in his life and now he couldn't stop.

Tony had been texting him all week asking how he was. Mark hadn't replied. He hadn't seen of spoken to anyone since he'd been attacked and Tony had stopped it. He'd brought him home and made sure he was OK before leaving but Mark hadn't been able to speak to him then and he couldn't now.

Tony, meanwhile, hadn't stopped thinking about Mark either. He'd stood and watched while his new friend had been fucked in the mouth and (he could admit it to himself) he'd enjoyed it. Tony had been with a man once. It was a few years ago after a drunken party. He'd been curious and decided to give it a go. They'd given mutual blow jobs and then Tony had screwed the other guy in the arse. It had been amazingly tight but he figured it was nothing he couldn't get from a woman. He, like Mark, had no interest in men at all. He was straight through and through...but if he was, why was he feeling like this about Mark?

Tony's phone beeped with a text. His heart skipped a beat when he saw it was from Mark. 'Why am I getting so excited about this?' he thought 'I must be crazy!' He picked up the phone and read the message carefully:

'Tony, just wanted to say thanks for the other night. Sorry not been in touch, was really confused. Pretty embarrassed that you saw that. Understand if you don't want to be mates. Mark'

Without thinking, Tony grabbed his keys, got in his car and drove straight to Marks house. Marks mum let him in saying "If you can get him to snap out of this strop he's in, you're better than me!" she slammed off into the kitchen, muttering something about ungrateful kids.

Tony walked up the stairs to Marks room and knocked on the door "Mum! I told you to leave me the fuck alone!" came the shout through the door

"It's me" said Tony. After a few seconds, the door opened and Mark stood there. He stared at Tony, his eyes red. He clearly hadn't had a shave or a shower in days and looked like he hadn't slept either. Tony ached to hold him but knew it was the worst thing he could do and he still couldn't figure out why he felt like this.

Mark had turned away and sat on the bed. He waved Tony to a chair in the corner and sat back, staring at him.

After a couple of minute's silence, Mark spoke "Why are you here?"

"I was worried about you. I hadn't heard from you and then I got your message and you seemed to think I wouldn't want to know you anymore"

"Yeah well, you saw me doing that with a bloke and then I had my arms around you and I thought you might think I was coming on to you"

Tony looked at him, trying to figure out what to say "I realised you were being attacked and when you got hold of me, I figured it was shock." He said.

Mark looked at Tony in silence for a few moments and then looked away. When he spoke again it was in a quiet, far away voice "I'm not gay but I didn't get in touch because after that night, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I'm sorry. I think it was just like a whole saviour thing. I wanted you to keep hold of me and look after me and I thought I was gay. I'm sorry. I still do feel like that and I'm sorry! I'm so sorry but I don't know what to think!"

In the silence that followed this outburst Mark heard Tony stand up and move across the room 'Fuck, what have I done? He's going to hate me and tell everyone what happened...I'm such a fucking moron!' Mark looked up and realised that Tony had shut the door and was stood looking at him. He held his breath, waiting for the negative reaction he expected.

Tony took a deep breath and sat down beside Mark. He slowly put his arm around Marks shoulder and pulled him close until Marks head was resting on his chest. "I know" he said "I felt the same and I didn't know what to do. I've never been into other men...I mean, I experimented a few years ago but I never thought I'd feel like this about a man"

Slowly, Mark raised his head and looked up into Tony's face. Tony leaned down to him and their lips met. They kissed gently and then laid on the bed running their hands over each other and kissing.

Suddenly, Mark giggled. Tony looked at him with one eyebrow raised "What's so funny?" he asked

"Just all this! I can't believe it! Last week I thought you were going to throw me off the rugby ground for using it as a short cut, then we became friends, then you rescued me and now we're lying here like a couple!"

Tony smiled, "Yeah, it's a bit mental" he said "What are you going to do now? Go to uni?"

Mark sat up, frowning "I can't go to uni yet" he said "I've missed the deadline for applications and I have no money, no car, no anything! I sold everything to raise money for my trip so I couldn't afford uni right now anyway...plus I have a good reason to stay around for a while" he smiled as he said the last bit and stroked the side of Tony's face.

"If you hadn't said that last part, I think I could have got you a job!" laughed Tony

"Seriously?"

"Yep, I need a partner" Mark raised an eyebrow at Tony

"That wasn't exactly what I had in mind!" he said

Tony laughed again "I'm doing night security at the rugby club, we've had a lot of vandalism going on in the grounds so we've all taken on a bit of the security. I was between jobs and the committee decided to make the post a paid one. Thing is, they want to take someone else on as well so we can have someone in the office while the other one patrols."

"Would they be alright with you asking if you can take a friend on?" asked Mark

"Is that all I am?" replied Tony. Mark looked at him, unsure what to say. "I'm sorry, I'm just being silly. I don't know what to call this either!" Tony said. "The committee said that I can take on who I want, it's a 12 hour shift so I have to get on ok with the person I hire. It's crap pay but you get a shift allowance and, of course, the pleasure of my company for the evening!"

Mark thought about the offer. He had nothing to lose. A job was a job and he'd be with his...friend. "Why not then? Sounds perfect for me. I can stay up with you all night and sleep all day and never have to see my damn mother!"

"Cool, I'll get the paperwork sorted and you can fill it all in tonight. Just bring your bank details with you. Wear what you want, there's no uniform. In fact, the only rule is that you don't wear green; that's our rival's colours!"

"Woah, what about an interview? An application form? Y'know, the usual stuff" exclaimed Mark. Tony leaned forward and kissed him.

"Well, your interview went well and that was your application form" he grinned. Mark smiled, tonight was going to be a good night. Tony left shortly after telling him to try and get some sleep and saying he was going to the same. Mark went downstairs and his mother about his new job. Her response was a long tirade about him abandoning her and ending in her usual cry of "It's not fair!" Mark was used to this, he'd heard it nearly every day since his father had died. As far as his mother was concerned, she was the only one affected by his dad dying. She didn't seem to care or understand that losing a father hurt just as much as losing a husband. He let the words wash over him and tried not to hate her. Turning round, Mark went back to his room, locked the door and stretched out on his bed.

He laid there a long time trying to sleep. His mind was full of thoughts of Tony, he wanted to go further than just kissing but he was scared too. He tried to imagine it and found himself getting hard. He ran his hand up and down his cock, pretending it was Tony doing it to him and felt a tingle run down his spine. His mind drifted back to the events of last week and the feeling of holding another man's dick in his mouth. Instead of the repulsion and loathing he'd felt just a few hours before, he remembered the feel and the taste and imagined that it was Tony who he'd been sucking. The thought of it felt so right that he came without warning. He licked the cum off his fingers, still pretending it was Tony. Then, he cleaned himself off, rolled onto his side and fell asleep.

Marks alarm woke him at 6pm and he woke full of anticipation. He still didn't understand why he was feeling this way. He was still convinced he was straight and he couldn't figure out why he was feeling like this about another man. For once, he'd decided not to fight events, he was going to go with the flow and see where it led him. Mark was convinced that this was his shot at happiness and he was happy to see where the path took him.

After a quick shower, he threw on a pair of jeans and a jumper. Going downstairs he raided the fridge for something to eat and grabbed a jacket. Reaching the front door, he froze. 'I have to go down the alley' he thought 'It's dark and I have to down the alley' Mark tried to will himself to move but he couldn't. The fear he was feeling consumed him. He couldn't move! Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Mark yelped and then heard a familiar, if muffled, voice "Mark, it's Tony" Mark opened the door and saw Tony standing there. Without thought, he stepped forward and reached for him. Tony grabbed Mark and pulled him into hug. Kissing Marks hair, he told him "I thought I'd come for you, I wouldn't make you walk down there by yourself. It's ok, I'm here."

Mark leaned against him for a moment before stepping back "I'm ok" he said "We'd better stop, I'm not ready for anyone to...you know"

"It's fine" Tony told him "I know what you mean, I can just imagine what your mother'd say if she found out!"

Mark grinned at him, yelled goodbye over his shoulder and walked out the house. "She'd probably say I wanted to ruin her life by not giving her grandkids or something"

At the entrance of the alley, Mark paused and took a breath. Tony looked around them and, seeing no one around, reached out and took hold of his hand "Come on" Together they walked hand in hand into the alley. After a few feet, Mark stopped. He let go of Tony's hand and put an arm round his waist instead. Tony smiled in the darkness and draped his arm across Marks shoulders. Neither of them spoke, they didn't want to break the mood. As they reached the end of the alley, they both left go of each other. There was nothing awkward about it, neither of them wanted to 'go public' yet, they weren't even sure what was going on! For now they were happy with what they had.

This set the tone of the next week. Each day, Tony would come for Mark in the evening and they would walk arm in arm to work. Once there, Mark would stay in the office while Tony walked the grounds. He'd come back and he and Mark would spend the next few hours playing with each other. Over the course of a few days, they had gone from kissing and holding hands to touching each other.

After a few days, Tony asked Mark if he could go down on him. Without hesitation, Mark agreed. It was the greatest experience of his life. To feel Tony's strong hands caressing his thighs while his soft lips wrapped around his cock. It was everything he'd imagined it could be. He came with a sigh that was more powerful than any scream or groan he could have made while coming and sat slouched in his chair for long moments, unable to speak.

Shaking himself out of his trance, Mark turned to Tony and smiled "I think I should return the favour" he said

"You, you don't have to." Stammered Tony "I know, after last time...I mean, I'll understand if you..."

"Shut up" said Mark. He pushed Tony down onto a chair and slowly unzipped his trousers. Taking out Tony's already hard cock, he gasped. He smiled up at Tony and shyly said "I didn't realise you were so big" before Tony could respond Mark had taken the head into his mouth. He swirled his tongue around it and gentle nibbled the end. He was amazed at how easy it was and how turned on he was getting! He looked up and Tony through his eyelashes. Tony leaned his head back against his seat and groaned. Smiling to himself Mark flicked his tongue all over Tony's dick, he worked his way down to his balls and then gently sucked them into his mouth. Tony's gasps got louder and Mark moved his mouth back up Tony's cock to taste the pre-cum that was leaking out of him. Tony was getting louder and louder. Mark gently stroked his balls in one hand while using his other to wank Tony into his mouth. All the time he carried on sucking.

Through gritted teeth, Tony moaned "Stop, stop, I'm gonna cum...Please...oh God...oh please!" Mark carried on. He slid Tony's cock further into his mouth until he felt like he was going to gag. Determined to take more, he carried on. Each time he tried, he got more into his mouth. Feeling Tony starting to buck his hips he clamped his lips around Tony's dick and felt the hot, salty cum flood his tongue. Sitting back, he swallowed what he good. Tony looked at him in amazement, "That was unbelievable! I've never felt anything like that!" Mark smiled. Cum had dripped out the corner of his mouth and he reached up to wipe it away. Tony stopped him, he reached out and gently ran his tongue over Marks lips, cleaning the last of his seed from his mouth.

They kissed for what seemed an eternity and then laid together on the floor, holding each other. Mark looked up into Tony's eyes and realised that this was it, he was safe, he was happy... more happy than he had been in a long time. This was the new start he had wanted. It wasn't what he had expected, he had never thought that he would be fulfilled by another man but, right at this moment, he couldn't imagine anywhere he'd rather be, or anyone he'd rather be with.