Finding Goddess Ch. 11

"Yes? You wanted to see me, sir?"

"Ah, Miss Connors. I just finished speaking to Miss Cassidy and she seemed surprisingly chipper for once. She spoke quite highly of you in particular. Said her meeting with you had been a very informative and inspiring experience."

"Ohh. What...exactly did she say?"

"Oh, a great many things. Such as how you provided actually useful feedback for once, showed you were clearly well-versed in the kind of experiences she was looking for in her writing material, finally understood what we are looking for in the books we publish, that sort of thing. She claimed she might even have an idea for a new story entirely thanks to you."

"I...I see."

"I understand she is a very difficult client to work with, Miss Connors, but she is a very important one, so I would like you to know that I greatly appreciate the work you have put in with her. Nobody else in our company has been able to reach Miss Cassidy in nearly the same capacity as you have today. The next time she needs a little one-on-one time with us, I'll know exactly who to turn to."

"G...great."

"Are you feeling well, Miss Connors? You look awfully red, and you're shaking an awful lot."

"I'm fine."

"You don't need to lie to me for the sake of your job, Miss Connors. And you shouldn't. Go on. Take the rest of the day off. You've earned it."

"I...I...alright. Thank you, sir."

***

Carol thought the way clothes felt on her body yesterday was bad, but after her meeting with Elaine, they had become even more unbearable. Whereas before they closed in on her like a coffin, today it was more apt to say they were piercing her flesh like an iron maiden. It almost hurt to wear them, made her feel dizzy and feverish, even sick to her stomach. It didn't help that they were wet here and there with spilt coffee. At least, she hoped that wetness was just from spilt coffee.

But more than anything else, her hands seemed to be operating on their own accord. They wanted to pop every button off her blouse until her breasts popped out, they wanted to peel every inch of nylon off her legs until they were left completely bare, they wanted to stroke every erogenous area on her body until she burst again. Every ounce of her willpower had to be devoted to keeping one hand firmly grasped on the other to prevent either from stripping her bare while she talked to her boss. Even that was shaky. Or maybe it was just her legs that were shaky. With how violently they were trembling, Carol's ability to stand up for any length of time could only be described as a miracle.

Miracle...I seem to be experiencing a bunch of those, lately.

Carol didn't wait until she got home before she began to take her clothes off. The second her car door slammed shut, she was already tearing voraciously into them, starting with her shoes. She tossed them so contemptuously into her backseat that she could hear the heels snap. Her stockings followed; she didn't so much peel those off her legs as she ripped them off, tearing numerous holes in the fabric and ruining them completely. She didn't care. They were clothes. She hated them. Hated how they covered her body, hated how they stuck to her skin so tightly, hated how they gave her so little room to breathe. If Carol never had to wear stockings again, it would be too soon.

"And...there! Ahhhhhhhh. Much better." Carol let out a deep sigh of relief once she slid her skirt off. She was bottomless now. From the waist down, she didn't have a thread or a stitch on her body. And it felt so good! Even her skin seemed to be moaning with happiness. Things were much less tight around her, air circulated in and out of her lungs more freely, and the temperature just seemed to drop dramatically in and around the mother the more nude she got.

"I should be allowed to be like this all the time," she murmured as she rubbed her thighs and wiggled her toes. "And I could be...if I converted to Zenrism."

Her smile faltered with that thought. Convert to Zenrism. That would definitely solve all her problems. Heck, it would give her everything she ever wanted in life. Permanent 24/7 nudity! Bodily freedom! Sexual liberty! It was everything a woman could ever ask for.

But...it was a big step. One that would no doubt turn her whole life upside-down. It would change the way everyone looked at her, it would dictate the things she would do, the crowds she would run with, and so on. And Carol wasn't so sure she was ready to make such a massive change so soon. She couldn't help but be a little suspicious of it as well; Zenrism sounded too good to be true. There was a definite catch to it, there had to be. It was a cult after all, one that would expect her to believe in all kinds of nonsense.

But then, how nonsensical could it actually be? Strange things were happening the moment she learned about it. Henrietta forgot to put her clothes on the one time. Carol was forgetting to put her clothes on every single day. And she was stripping herself naked without realizing it. Wearing clothing was getting more uncomfortable by the day, the hot coffee didn't affect her at all, in fact, now that she thought about it, it didn't affect Maisie either when it spilled all over her the other day. Was it just as the Holy Scripture said in the story of Kinuse? Were Zenrists really resistant to fire and heat?

And then there were the words that the priestess whispered in her ear as they made love in the grotto.

"I need...I need to think about this," said Carol. Realizing she had been sitting in her car for ten minutes without any pants on, she decided it was time to get a move on. Turning the key in the ignition, the mother rolled the vehicle out of the parking lot and drove away.

***

Driving bottomless was great, but it wasn't enough. Carol's breasts were still trapped in the confines of her blouse, and the way they were pushing against the fabric told her they were screaming for freedom like two hungry babes. So when she stopped at her first red light, Carol wasted no time in giving them their wish. She was naked now, completely butt-naked in her car, and no one was the wiser. No one except maybe the two people in the van right next to her who were staring at her with eyes the size of saucepans.

"Uh...hi," Carol giggled as she gave them a nervous little wave, not knowing what else to do. Fortunately, the light chose that moment to turn green, mercifully giving her a reason to vamoose. "Bye!"

So here Carol was, driving in her car totally naked. It had been a while since she did that and she forgot how...fun it was. Sure, she got to ride with Henrietta as a passenger a few days ago, but this was different. Carol had full control of the situation now. She could drive as fast or as slow as she wanted, pull up as close to the curb as she liked, and decide for herself if she wanted to go left or right. In essence, she had a choice in who she could reveal her naughty little secret to. That college-age group of girls entering the cafe? The old man with the cane on the crosswalk? The despondent-looking mother exiting the grocer with two bags of food in her hands? All viable marks.

N-not that she would of course! Such a thing would most definitely get Carol in trouble, and she didn't want to push her luck anymore. Not after she miraculously dodged that cannonball with Elaine. But if I were a Zenrist, there wouldn't be any luck to push...

She let that thought hang until she pulled into her apartment building's parking lot. She very nearly opened the door and stepped outside before remembering that she was still naked. Riding around in the car without a thing on was one thing, nobody had to know what she was doing (and few people did). But it was another thing altogether to stroll outside in the...altogether. Everyone would see what she was doing, and there would be no way to deny it. Carol would need to put something on first.

But as the mother gazed at her assorted clothes, which had been tossed haphazardly around the car, a feeling of despondence seemed to fall over her. She didn't...want to put them on. She didn't want them covering her breasts, her stomach, her back, her thighs, her butt, her anything. She didn't want them anywhere on her body! Not even for the couple minutes it would take just to walk from her car to her apartment. And now that she was looking at her blouse lazing about on the passenger seat, Carol couldn't help but feel her skin crawl simply from seeing how close it was to her. It was like it could, at any moment, leap up and pounce on her, covering her beautiful skin with its odious fabric.

"Screw it," she said, flinging the door open without a second thought. "I already showed everyone on this street my naked body. What's flashing myself one more time gonna hurt?"

Carol shivered with joy as she stepped out and the sun hit her bare skin, warming it in all the best ways. Goddess, these were the moments she lived for. That she used to live for. That she could live for. That she would do anything to live for. To live nakedly every minute of every day, to feel the very essence of the world with her every inch of skin. The sun caressed everything; its rays crept down her thighs, over the contours of her back, along the slopes of her breasts, and even crawled between her buttocks and slightly parted lower lips. Even the soles of her bare feet were not spared the sun's touch as they took in its warmth from the ground.

"Mmmmm," she moaned as she stretched herself out, thrusting her breasts into the air just to expose them to more of the sun's warming light. This feels divine. Being naked is such a blessing. Why can't more people realize that?

Deciding that she had spent enough time soaking in the rays, Carol locked her car and headed inside, leaving her clothing behind.

***

Carol hummed a cheerful tune as she mopped up the floor. Since coming home, she had spent the last couple hours cleaning the apartment and erasing all evidence of her and Katy's illicit activities, and like everything else she had done at home for the past week, she did it nude. It was such an interesting change of pace doing housework like this. Her breasts jiggled back and forth as she swept up the floorboards, air rushed in between her spreading butt cheeks each time she bent down to pick something up, and the sound of her footsteps changed as her bare soles slapped against linoleum tiles that started off dry and dirty and ended pleasantly damp and clean. It was almost like taking a reverse bath, where instead cleaning her naked body, her naked body was cleaning the world.

"It's been a long time since I did this," she mused. Back when Robert was still alive, she would do everything in whatever home they shared in the buff. She slept in the buff, ate in the buff, read in the buff, watched TV in the buff, and yes, even did domestic chores in the buff. Even back then, she had learned doing something as mundane as sweeping the floor could be turned into a fun activity if it was done without any clothing on. Carol chuckled at the memory of how she used sway her hips playfully and seductively with the broom. Her poor husband couldn't get anything done whenever she got busy.

Carol sighed. She missed those days. They just seemed so liberated and carefree.

In any case, the apartment was clean now, and with a little potpourri or some incense, it would smell good as new. Nobody would have to know what wicked things Carol had done in the meanwhile. Besides Katy of course. And Henrietta. And...whoever else Carol decided to be open about her sex life to. But never Mindy and Erin! They didn't need to know. For their own good.

Thinking about her daughters caused Carol's eyes to stray over to their bedroom door. Was it really as clean as she remembered it being? There didn't seem to be any sign of any lewdness last time she checked, but she couldn't be sure. She had only looked in for a moment.

"Eh, wouldn't hurt to check again."

The room looked just as untouched now as it did this morning. The beds were immaculately made without a single wrinkle to be found in the sheets, the chairs were still upright, and all the various papers, books, writing utensils, and other things the girls kept on their desks were still in place. Mindy's was a little messier, but that was to be expected. If any sexual shenanigans had occurred in here, Carol couldn't see them.

I do wonder though, if they ever got into any sexual shenanigans themselves?

That was one thing Carol was certain she would never know for obvious reasons, but being a mother, she couldn't help but at least be a little concerned about it. Erin had one boyfriend that she was aware of, though Carol hadn't met him yet, and as far as she could tell, Mindy was single. However, it was possible both of them had some secret paramours in the past she never found out about.

Carol wasn't too worried about them getting any unwanted pregnancies. She told them all there was to know about having sex safely and responsibly. She just...hoped that if they were having sex, it was with good people, and that they were ready for it, and that they didn't feel any pressure, and...and...

...And I hope maybe they're willing to experiment with girls.

Ah, girls. If there was one thing Carol regretted more than giving up her nudist lifestyle, it was taking as long as she had to discover, or perhaps just admit to, her attraction to the fairer sex. Because ever since she got her first taste of feminine flesh, rubbed her face between her first pair of breasts, ground herself on her first womanly flower, she couldn't get enough of it. She liked lesbian sex. She loved it. Maybe even more than straight sex. And she wanted her daughters to discover and experience all the wonders of lesbianism earlier than she had because...because...

"...Because it is what the Goddess made us for!" she said clasping her hands to her chest and squeezing her breasts sumptuously.

Carol stopped her ministrations. "What did I just say? No, scratch that, what am I doing? I can't do this in my daughters' room!" Hastily, she scurried out and shut the door behind her, her whole body red as a beet.

"Damn it. I've been putting this off long enough," she said, marching straight to her purse where the Scripture awaited her. "It's time to confront this issue of mine head on and straight from the source!"

She needed to speak to the Zenrists themselves, hear from them just what was going on with her. Carol figured she could easily find a website via a search engine, and from there find a number she could call, but it would save time if she just checked the book for the URL outright.

It turned out the Scripture saved her a few more steps than she thought it would. For while the book's title page did indeed include a URL leading to what she assumed was the Zenrists' home page, it also had a phone number written in pink-colored ink and big loopy characters along with a message saying "Call me! XOXOXO!" The exclamation points were even dotted with hearts.

"Don't tell me this is Celeste's number," she murmured. The woman just seemed so regal and dignified; Carol couldn't even begin to picture her doing something so girlishly corny. "Well, might as well get on with it."

She dialed the number, listened to the rings, and started bracing herself. She needed answers, and if she had to pry teeth out of that woman to get them, so be it. Nothing was going to get by Carol, she was ready to play hardball, and there was no way in hell she'd let herself get swayed by a pretty face—

"I'm here, my love," said the sweet, soothing voice of Celeste on the other line. "Tell me what you need of me."

"Eh heh, heh, heh!"

The sound of the priestess' voice was enough to turn Carol into a puddle of goo on the spot.

"Caroline Connors," said Celeste. Carol stiffened as the woman uttered her name. She could almost hear the Zenrist priestess curve her lips into a gentle and motherly smile.

"How...how did you know it was me?" said Carol who suddenly felt herself tremble all over.

"I recognized your voice," answered the priestess. "I remember every little nectarine sound that dripped from your lips. Every moan you poured into my ear, every passionate cry you gifted to me as I gifted you, every murmur I drank from your throat when we kissed. And what I remember the most, childe...is the way you laughed. Hm-hm-hm-hm-hm!"

Carol could almost feel the whole world around her shake with Celeste's subtle little laugh on the other end of the line. So gentle and comforting...like something she could rock herself to sleep to.

She gulped. "Celeste, I...I...I need help, and I...I don't know where else to turn."

"Then tell me what ails you, childe," said the priestess. "Tell me what is troubling your mind, and I will offer you my guidance."

Carol shivered. For reasons she couldn't explain, she swore she could feel Celeste's arms wrapping around her in a tight, maternal hug. She could feel the priestess rubbing her cheek against Carol's own like an affectionate cat. She could feel the priestess's lips on her ear as she whispered her sweet-sounding words to her. But such a thing wasn't possible; Carol was at home, in her kitchen, a hundred miles away from the brilliant redhead living in the ornate Temple.

"It...it's hard to explain, but the thing is," Carol stammered, having no idea where to even begin. She intended to go into this hard, to demand just what kind of trick the priestess played on her, to treat this whole thing like it was an interrogation. But now that she was here, listening to Celeste's voice, feeling like she was actually in her presence...she couldn't find it in herself to feel angry or accusatory at all. "I think I'm losing control of myself."

So Carol told Celeste all the strange things that had happened to her. All the times she stripped naked without realizing it, all the times she nearly forgot to put her clothes back on, all the times she felt the urge to tear the horrible, hateful things off her body, all the times she felt her lust overtake her or nearly overtake her. She told Celeste everything until she could tell her no more, and only when she finished did Carol realize she was beginning to tear up like a guilt-ridden child.

"There's something wrong with me!" she wept. "Please, Celeste! Tell me what I should do! Because if this keeps up, I think...I think I'll do something I'll regret!"

"My childe," cooed Celeste as her phantom arms tightened around Carol and pulled her ever closer to the priestess. "My poor, sweet childe. There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing at all."

"But...but it hurts me to wear clothes!" said Carol. "What if I can't wear them again? And what if I...what if I get caught somewhere I really shouldn't be naked in? What if I assault some poor girl? What if..."

"There is nothing wrong with you," Celeste repeated much more firmly, firm enough to clam Carol up on the spot. "What you are experiencing, childe, is what every woman experiences as she undergoes her metamorphosis."

"I don't...understand."

"In every person's life, there are periods where they must undergo swift and rapid change within. From wombling to newborn. From newborn to child. From child to adolescent. From adolescent to adult. Every one of these periods of transition are marked by moments of confusion and emotional instability, all brought about from the pain of the body and soul growing so violently and forcefully. Bone pushing and piercing through muscle, humours pumping through the veins, needles clawing out of the skin...to say nothing of your first bleeding and all that comes with it. They are not pleasant experiences, as you no doubt can recall.