Finding My Place Pt. 02

Everyone in this is over 18. If you have any feedback, I'd love to hear it.

*****

As much as I hate to admit it, I slept amazingly well. My whole life I had slept on a worn out mattress, with tattered linens, and blankets covered in holes. The room Noah had prepared for me had the softest sheets, pillows, and the most comfy comforter I had ever felt. Even if I escaped, I would miss this, that was for sure. I looked out my bedroom window, it seemed to be almost noon. 'Thank God,' I thought to myself. Noah had let me be all morning, maybe I could just hide in my room all day to avoid him. 'He might have checked on me while I was asleep,' that thought sent shivers up my spine.

I looked in the closet, it was stocked with six more copies of the dress I was put in yesterday. It was white cotton, thin, and see-through. It dawned on me that my ass and cock where on display for everyone yesterday. 'That's humiliating, but what's an abducted boy with a remote control torture device in his body to do?' I snorted at the thought. I was in too good of spirits for someone bound for sex slavery, but maybe that was the effects one night of luxury had on a dirt poor kid. I either had to deal with this or escape, and that's not something I was sure I was capable of.

Sneaking to the bathroom was nerve-wracking. I tip-toed there, didn't flush as to not make any noise, and tried to tip-toe back to my room to avoid my 'husband.' I didn't think he would notice, but Noah suddenly called out, "Good morning, Sleepy Head." I nervously laughed at being caught in the act, but inside I was terrified of what was to come next. "I think you forgot to flush." He said. I quickly walked back to flush and tried to subdue the nervous feeling in my stomach.

"I had hoped you wouldn't hear me," I said.

"I didn't. I came to offer you some breakfast and maybe a chance to talk." I said nothing. I didn't know what to say. "I get the whole deer in head lights thing, I really do. But when I say maybe talk, I mean we are going to talk. Come down stairs." For the first time in my short few interactions with Noah his tone turned authoritative like a parent commanding a disobedient child. He was bigger than me by a long shot and I didn't want to be zapped by the device so I slowly followed him to the main kitchen downstairs.

That morning Noah had prepared a pretty large spread for breakfast. There was two fake mini trees on the table, bananas hanging from one, a vine of grapes hanging from the other with a bowl of assorted fruits in between them. There was a plate with two large frosted pastries, another with eggs, bacon, and a pitcher of OJ in the middle. It was the most food I had ever seen in my life at one time.

Noah pulled out a chair for me to sit. "I didn't know what you liked so I made a few things."

"Holy crap, this looks awesome!" I exclaimed. My ravaged stomach and this relatively amazing spread made me forget where I was or why.

"I guess this seems like a lot considering where you are from," Noah said. His comment quickly reminded me of my circumstances. Despite this it seemed like Noah was trying to make a kind gesture.

"Thank you," I said quietly.

"I didn't think I would here a 'thank you' so soon, I am glad to see my plan worked so quickly," Noah said with a laugh. I'm not sure if he was joking.

As we ate, Noah made small talk. I didn't say much in response. He asked me about my interests, I said I wasn't sure I had any. He asked me how I liked the house, I said it was nice. He asked me what I thought of him so far, I said he had abducted me and could go to hell. Noah almost snorted OJ out his nose. "I like you," he laughed. "Don't you want to know anything about me?"

"Not really."

"Come on, ask me anything."

"Why would you do this to me?" I said sincerely wanting an answer.

"Um..." Noah took a deep breath, re-centered himself, and decided not to answer my question. "My last name is Williams. I'm 27. I have two degrees. And I have lived here just over two years." Noah stared at me, waiting for a response or a question. I didn't give him one.

"Okay, well, we have established you aren't my biggest fan. So, we have got a guest coming over tonight. She's a nurse, she works at the local clinic and helps out with the new girls..."

"I'm not a girl," I interrupted.

"Sure, sure. Still, she's coming to see you tonight and she's going to examine you. I need you to be showered and ready for her. One of the rules while you stay here is that you will always be clean. Hygiene is important to me and I don't think they bathed you while you was out. As cute as you look, I can smell you from here.."

"Your end goal is to rape me! Maybe I just don't shower..." I sounded more like a teenage girl sassing her parents for not letting her go to a party than a man standing up for himself.

"My goal is to care for you. But there are rules to us being here and things I expect from you in return. I plan on being as easy with you as possible. I could beat you, many men have broken their wives in that way. I could zap you until you throw up blood, I've seen that too. I could have had you in my bed last night, fucked your tight little ass so sore you couldn't walk today, and then made your bitch ass cook me breakfast. But, here we are, not doing those things. Now, shower, there is shampoo and soap and a big fluffy, very expensive towel in the bathroom next to your room. You will use them all." He was firm, scary, but his voice barely raised. I could tell he was making great effort to hold back his fury. I didn't want to see that.

My eyes welled up with tears. I was intimidated, small, and had very little options. "I don't wanna be raped, Noah." I said letting the tears flow.

"It's only rape if you don't want it. My goal is not to rape you as well." He said standing and putting his hand on my shoulder. He leaned in and kissed my cheek softly from behind. "If you need me, I am going to sit on the porch, do a little reading, and try to calm down. Finnish eating, then please, do as I ask. I will clean up."

I couldn't continue eating. I was a bundle of nerves. I was angry, terrified, and something else I have never experienced before. When Noah kissed my cheek gently with his soft black lips, I had surprisingly liked it. I had never had anyone touch me like that. He touched me gently and sweetly. I felt loved. Or at the very least like I could be loved.

"FUCK!!" I screamed as I burst into tears. I'm aware my reaction to his nice gestures and sweet touches are exactly what he wants. He wants be to voluntarily turn gay for him. Fuck him...

I when upstairs to my room, slammed the door, threw myself on the bed, and cried. 'What do I do?' I didn't have an answer for myself. Eventually, I cried myself to sleep.

When I woke, my pillow was wet. My skin was crusty from dried tears and God knows what else. Looking out the window I saw twilight. I instantly remembered Noah's warning and panicked. I didn't know when this lady was going to be here. I ran to the bathroom and figured out the controls on the fancy shower head.

The shower was large and ornate like everything else in this house. I washed myself as quickly as possible. My hair took no time as it was less than a quarter inch long. The shampoo and soap smelled like strawberries and soon, so did I. When I was done I grabbed the over-sized fluffy towel hanging on the rack. It was as soft as the warmest blankets and barely even felt wet when I was done with it. On the bathroom counter lay all the amenities for dental care including a pink toothbrush. I cleaned my teeth and freshened my breath. There was no clothes laid out for me so I wrapped myself in the towel and ran downstairs to find Noah, hoping I wasn't late and he wasn't mad.

I slipped on the last couple steps and almost landed on my ass. Luckily, Noah had seen me coming and was close by when I slipped. He grabbed both my arms preventing my fall. My towel fell to the ground leaving me naked, smelling of strawberries, and held by a tall, muscular, black man intent on torturing or seducing me into willing sex slavery.

Noah laughed and shook his head. "Careful, baby. Are you OK?" He smiled broadly at me.

I burst into tears and started babbling incoherently. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I fell asleep, and I didn't mean to fall. Please don't be mad. I'll be good, I promise. Please don't be angry." I'm not sure Noah could make out what I was saying. I'm not even sure I knew what I was saying. I babbled on until Noah got me on my own feet and pulled me in close wrapping one arm around me and pushing my head into his chest with the other.

"Shhh..." he comforted me. "Shhh, it's okay. She's not here yet. Not going to be for another 20 minutes or so." He petted my bristly hair as my head rested of the his amazingly firm chest. I wanted someone to hold me, I didn't want HIM to hold me.

"I'm afraid of you, Noah." I cried. "What if I'd been late? What would you have done to me?"

"It's OK, Baby. We don't have to think about that. You're on time." He shook me a little and looked me in the eyes. "Congrats, Baby, you did well. Hopefully this is lesson enough and we don't have to move on to anything else."

I choked back the tears. "Noah?"

"Yeah?"

"Noah, I don't have any clothes..."

"What do you mean?"

"Everything in the closet is the same as what I had on. It's see-through.," I explained to him.

"That's intentional, Baby. Until you have been here longer that is all you are supposed to wear."

"What about the lady that's coming over?" I asked.

Noah picked up the towel on the ground and wrapped it around me. "She's going to need you to undress anyway." Just then the doorbell rang. "You want to answer it?" He said this like he was offering a child a chance to do a 'big kid' task for the first time. I meekly shook my head no.

Noah squeezed, released me, then jogged to get the door. He greeted the lady at the door. They cheerfully talked as he took her coat and ushered her in my direction.

"Oliver's getting back a day late so we'll have to switch your appointments... oh my gosh, just look at you!!" she exclaimed, cutting her small talk with Noah short as she ran over to look at me. She was older, maybe mid fifties, but you could tell she took care of herself quite well. She was my height and thin. Her mostly silver shoulder length hair was parted of center and was highlighted with a few strands of brown. "You are just adorable! Oh my God, I'm just so excited for you!" She took the towel from around my body and spread in on the hard wood floor of the living room. "Stand here Sweetie."

I complied and did my best to cover my genitals. She circled me, looking me up and down before finding a nearby chair to sit in while making notes on a clipboard.

Noah brought her a glass of some sort of liquor garnished by an orange wedge and introduced her as Ms. Johnson. "Emma, Dear. Ms. Johnson reminds me I'm getting old. You on the other hand," she peered into her chart, "Desirae Williams. Desirae, what a lovely name for a pretty young thing like yourself."

"It's pronounced Deziree. And I haven't talked to her about that yet," Noah interjected.

"Talked about what?" I asked.

"You're name sweetheart. You can't keep your silly little boys name. Deziree is exotic. No wonder you picked it out, Noah. That's a name to drive you wild at night!" Emma chuckled.

"I like Devin," I sobbed naked and on display.

"Oh, come now. I was hoping this one wouldn't be a crier. They are all criers these days." Emma scoffed and took a big sip of her drink. "Alright, moving on if you are going to be that way. Let me check the damage. Bend over a grab your ankles."

I did what I was commanded to do, while sobbing quietly. Emma put on blue rubber gloves then knelt behind me. She spread my ass cheeks and rubbed her finger over my virgin bud. She let out a "Hmmm" before turning to give Noah a curious look. "Did you fuck her?"

"Not yet." Noah said simply.

"I see, in that case I'll leave the suppository with you and you can administer it after you have finished tonight."

My heart stopped. Tonight? It was happening tonight?! "It's fine, Emma. Go ahead and give it to her." Noah said.

Emma lubed a finger and then dabbed a bit of lube on my ass. She pushed her finger into me slowly until it was all the way in. My ass burned with it first ever intruder. The muscles in my ass clenched and tried to push her out to no avail. As she moved her finger around, I grunted and whimpered. If this is a finger, I couldn't imagine a cock. She eventually pulled her finger away only to put a capsule at the entrance to my hole. She shoved it as deep into me as she could in one quick motion. I yelped out and tried to stand but Noah held me down. I felt her finger retreat from my ass and heard Emma remove her gloves. She playfully slapped my ass and told me to stand. Noah let me go and gave me a little pat on my shoulder. "Not that bad," Noah said. 'Maybe next time Noah could let this woman shove something up his ass instead,' I thought to myself.

"Turn around, Darling. I need to check your other side," Emma twirled her finger and I turned to face her. She lifted my little dick and fondled my balls. I assume she was checking for defects. "Your lips most be very talented to get him to wait two whole nights to break in that sweet ass. You have to teach me your secret so I can surprise my hubby when he gets back in town."

"I haven't done anything with my lips..." I said, my tears drying.

She returned to her clipboard and gave Noah a very displeased look.

"Don't say it," Noah started.

"Noah, we talked about this. You where ready for this. You can't go easy on her. It just makes it harder in the long run." Emma argued.

"I said don't say it..."

"I care for you, Noah. We all do. But your kindness is going to hurt this girl."

"Can you just finish, please?"

"Listen."

"No, Emma, you listen. I appreciate everything you and Oliver and everyone else has done for me, I really do. But, this is my decision. Period. Now, if I feel things are going south I'll ask for help, but for now, give us space." Noah said firmly in a tone that was starting to become familiar.

Emma face turned red at being put in her place. She clearly had been just that, put in her place. "Deziree," she commanded turning away from Noah. "bend over the chair arm, ass in the air." She stuck a needle in my ass and injected me with something hot. She retrieved two pill bottles from her bag and handed them to me. The label just said Deziree and how often to take them. One pill was weekly one was daily.

"What are these for?" I asked. "What was the shot for?"

Emma ignored me and grabbed her own coat. She returned to grab her things and down the drink. "Make sure she takes those at least. She needs to start tonight. She will see Olivia tomorrow then Oliver and me the day after." She stomped toward the exit. She stopped just before she was out of my line of sight. "You are a lucky girl, Ms. Deziree. I will see you in two days." And then she was gone.

Noah looked angry. He grabbed the empty glass a took it into the kitchen. I followed him. He handed me a glass of water.

"Take your pills." He wasn't cheery. He was commanding. I took a pill out of each bottle and swallowed them. "Give me the bottles. Until I can trust you to take them yourself, I will give them to you daily."

"What are they?"

"Hormones. No one has lied to you. You will become a girl, that's not optional."

"But some things are? She was mad you hadn't raped me yet, wasn't she?"

Noah breathed deep and exhaled slowly. "The advice I'd been given was to break you early and work on our relationship after. To make you submit first and foremost. I don't want to do that to you." He said smiling at me. It was sweet. Since I've been here Noah has been nothing but nice to me.

"Noah?"

He looked at me. "Thank you."

Noah smiled, gave me a big hug and kissed my forehead. "You had better head on to bed. You're naked. And if I hold you like this much longer I'm going to change my mind."I giggled and ran to bed with a hand on my backside in a futile attempt to cover myself.

***

The next morning I felt great. I got out of the shower, toweled myself off, and looked at myself in the mirror. It felt weird seeing myself as I have always been whilst knowing I was about to start changing. I had never given any thought as to what it would be like to be a girl, but I had given a lot of thought as to what it would be like to not be poor. With rape and gay sex now off the table, I figured this might be a fair trade. I grabbed a fresh dress out of the closet and flexed my tiny muscles in the mirror. "I wonder if these will go away?" I muttered to myself. I went to the kitchen, opened a bottle of cranberry juice I found, and went back to my room to enjoy my comfy bed, great view, and the fresh air from my open window.

Fifteen minutes later I was dancing back to the kitchen, grabbed a couple bananas from the tree, and started to return to my room when I saw Noah. "Morning, Dez," he said cheerfully. "If that isn't my favorite fruit to watch you eat."

"Don't get any ideas," I said back playfully.

"Too late," he grinned. "I'm glad you're up and showered already. We have an appointment in half an hour." He put his coffee mug of the table. "I lost track of time while reading. If it wasn't for the courtesy call, I would have forgotten."

He patted my butt and ushered me out the door. I don't care for him touching my ass but I tried to think of it more like a father pushing his son to hurry up than anything sexual. That was hard to do in a transparent cotton sundress. I thought about asking him for something else to wear, but figured it a waste of breath. "Is this an appointment with the same lady?" I asked.

"No, today you're going to start therapy. We have a very talented psychologist here in town. Also, she's a friend, so be nice."

We walked back to town down the street lined with gardens and willow trees until we reached a house made of stone. It had two front doors. One door was a deep brown that really accented the stone of the house well. The other a bright royal blue with a plaque that read 'Olivia Jones - Licensed Clinician'.

Noah knocked on the door. Soon a woman in her mid forties appeared. She was a strawberry blonde with piercing blue eyes and pointed eyebrows. She wore a white cotton sundress much like the one I had been made to ware except thicker and not see-through. She hugged Noah then shook my hand "you must be Desirae, it's good to finally meet you." Her tone was sweet and compassionate. It did not at all match her fierce look.

"It's pronounced Deziree," Noah corrected. 'Fuck that name' I thought to myself while smiling and shaking this lady's hand.

She took Noah into her office first while I waited in a reception area. After five short minutes is was my turn. She lead me into her office and turned to shut the door behind us. Her beautiful heart shaped ass was perfectly framed by her dress. It forced an obvious erection from me that she saw and giggled at when she turn around. "Well, aren't you precious."

She motioned for me to sit across from her. "Deziree, my name is Olivia. How are you doing today?"

"I'm okay I guess," I measured my response.

"Oh? I doubt that. You have had a very significant week. Have you ever been to counseling before?" Her voice raised abnormally high with each question.

"No, Ma'am." I said meekly to this new intruder into my life.

"Well, as a therapist I can't tell anyone anything we discuss. Exceptions being if you tell me you are going to hurt yourself or someone else. So you can be honest with me. No blow-back, no punishment. I'm just here to listen."

Her voice was calming. However I doubted that she was sincere. Liam just wanted to use my phone until he abducted me. Ben just wanted me to be fulfilled, happy, and part of the community until he tortured me. Emma just wanted to make sure I was healthy until she set out augmenting my body. Noah was the only person that seemed fully honest with me. He wanted me to turn gay for him, sure. But he was honest about it at least.