First Time

He looked at me for a moment, that soft, hazy smile still on his lips. He ran his tongue all over my cock, his saliva glistening on my skin. Then he took me in his mouth again. Just the head this time, sucking hard on me. He wrapped one of his hands around the shaft of my cock and began stroking hard, the rhythm of his stroking matching the rhythm of his sucking. His other hand rubbed my balls, that hand moving in an opposite rhythm. “Oh God!” I exclaimed as I felt the contrast of rhythms. It was almost too much to bear! I couldn’t imagine how he could do that! But then, I couldn’t imagine anything at that moment! I watched him for a moment but that was way too much for me! I couldn’t take any visual stimulation…I could barely stand it as it was! My fingers clutched convulsively at the comforter, trying to grip it, to hold on to something. The light show behind my eyes was like the Fourth of July!

Then, just as I was certain I would just die before I came, I felt that sweet tightening of my muscles, felt that fleeting moment of pure tension—and then the incredible sensation of release. I came hard, harder than I had ever come in my life. I could feel the hot semen pumping from my burning cock. I collapsed back onto the bed, my breathing hard and fast. I just lay there, panting.

I felt him get up briefly, but I couldn’t possibly open my eyes to see where he went or what he was doing. I have no idea how much time passed before I felt him get back onto the bed and lie beside me. He took me in his arms. I could feel the sweat on his body—or was it from my body? I couldn’t tell; it didn’t matter. He brushed the hair from my eyes and kissed my forehead and then my cheek and then just under my ear, making that last kiss last a while, his lips brushing so softly over my skin, his breath hot against my neck. His hands caressed me, but with a hunger that had not been there before. As he pressed his body hard against mine, I could feel his cock against my hip. It was hard and hot.

He ran his tongue over my earlobe and his hot breath sent a chill through my body. He moved his body slightly and some how managed to turn me so that I was on my side and my back was against him. I felt him rub his cock against my ass. I could hear his breathing quicken. I could feel the heat from his body. I knew what he wanted.

He ran his hand down my side, his fingers massaging my skin as they moved slowly down to my hip. He pushed against my hip, turning me further over until I was lying on my stomach. His lips were on the back of my neck now, kissing me, sucking on my skin. One hand was on my shoulder, running down my arm, flexing his fingers in the muscles there. His other hand was now rubbing my ass, gently, really, considering I could tell he was absolutely on fire with desire at this point. He slipped his hand down between my legs, stroking the area from the base of my cock to the entrance of my ass. I gasped as his finger played at the opening. I tried to pull away from him, my breath quickening sharply as a wave of fear swept through me. He stopped instantly. He brought his hand up to my other shoulder and massaged it gently.

“I won’t hurt you, Lucas.” He whispered the words against my ear. He turned me over a little, to look in my eyes. He caressed my cheek and ran his fingers softly along my eyebrows. He tilted his head slightly and that look of wonder that had been in his eyes after our first kiss reappeared. “You are so very beautiful, you know. “ And he frowned, his brows knitting. “How anyone could ever want to hurt you is beyond imagining. But I know they did.” His words were barely more than a whisper.

He must have seen my reaction, the surprise and horror I felt at his words must have shown in my eyes. He ran a finger over my lips, then touched his lips to mine briefly, softly. “I know what happened, Lucas.” He put his finger over my lips as I started to ask him how, how he knew. My thoughts were racing. Did everyone in the world know? He seemed to read my mind and smiled very gently. “Mark told me, babe. He loves you, you know. Probably more than you realize. He told me a long time ago. Cried it all over me. But no one will hear it from me, Lucas.

“But you need to know it doesn’t have to be like that.” His expression grew very serious as he stared into my eyes. “I would never hurt you, babe.” He caressed my cheek as he shook his head slightly. “I won’t rush; I’ll take it very slowly. I want you so badly my entire body is on fire, but I promise you, I won’t do anything that won’t feel good. And if you truly don’t like what I do, I’ll stop. I won’t force anything on you. I only want to give you what you want.”

I stared up at him for a long moment. Even through the haze that clouded my senses—for they were still very cloudy, both because of the alcohol I drank and from the aftereffects of the most intense sex I had ever had—I could see that he meant what he said. His eyes stared into mine. And they drew me into his. I felt myself relaxing, noticed my breathing had almost returned to normal. I know he felt my reaction, because he smiled, and that look of wonder came into his eyes again. “So beautiful… “ I smiled back at him and sighed, a deep sigh that seemed to take the tension from my body. I turned myself back over on my stomach, resting my head on my arms. I felt suddenly very sleepy and very relaxed. I heard him catch his breath slightly before kissing the back of my neck once again.

He rubbed his hand over my back, slowly, his fingers kneading slightly. And wherever his hands touched his lips followed, light, soft kisses, warm, soft lips on my skin. I sighed as I felt myself drifting into a very hazy world. I could feel his hands on my skin, feel the warmth from his body. His touch was so light, almost not there. I started a bit as I felt him move, felt him kneel over me, straddle me. My tensing was instinctive and I felt almost embarrassed by it. I didn’t want to tense. I didn’t want him to think I was afraid. I wanted him to know that I wanted him, wanted whatever he wanted to do.

He felt my reaction and put both his hands on my shoulders, massaging them slowly, deeply. He bent down and kissed the back of my neck again, lightly, this time rubbing his cheek softly against my skin. As he bent down I could feel his hardness pressing against me, rubbing between the cheeks of my ass. I gasped a little, but did not shrink away as I had before. He kept rubbing my shoulders, his hands working a steady rhythm, massaging my muscles deeply. I felt the tension leaving my body, even as I felt him rubbing his cock against me. He moaned softly as he moved over me.

He moved his hands slowly down my back, keeping the pressure firm but gentle, working the tension from every muscle he touched. He paused his progress for a moment at my lower back, at the base of my spine. He placed the palms of both of his hands on that spot and rubbed outward, his fingers kneading into my sides. I soft groan of pleasure slipped through my lips. I was more relaxed than I could ever remember being. The heat from his hands, the rhythm of his hands—and the alcohol, no doubt!—put me even deeper into that hazy world. I knew it would be very easy for me to just go to sleep—except for the fact that I did not want to go to sleep. I did not want to stop feeling his touch.

As he rubbed back and forth, he would let his hands occasionally slip down, brushing over my ass, lightly at first, then with more pressure, more contact, until he was just rubbing my ass, nothing else. He stopped for a moment, his hands going to my thighs, pushing them apart slightly as he moved himself to kneel between my legs. I felt myself tense involuntarily. His hands instantly moved back to the base of my spine, repeating that gentle back and forth motion that had lulled me into such a calm, quiet place. Patiently—incredibly patiently!—he repeated his previous motions, until his hands were once again just rubbing my ass. While one hand continued to massage me gently, his other hand teased at the entrance to my body. His fingers just brushed the edges, not even trying to penetrate, as if he just wanted me to get use to the feeling of being touched there. He paused a moment and I felt a little sound leave my lips, a little murmur that clearly told him I did not want him to stop. I thought I heard him laugh a little at that sound.

I jumped a little when he touched me again. But it wasn’t from tension, just a reaction to the feeling of “cold” that was suddenly on his fingertips. He knew that, and I definitely heard him laugh a little that time. He rubbed the cold gel around my entrance, the slow, gentleness of his fingers warming the gel, forcing heat into my skin. I could feel my muscles relax even further at the warmth. And when he paused another moment and resumed touching me, even the coldness of the gel did not make me tense. Nor, surprisingly, did the feeling of his finger as it penetrated me.

I took a short breath as he moved his finger inside me, and I could feel my body squirm a little, but I wasn’t tensing, wasn’t pulling away from his touch. He continued to move his finger inside me, very gently probing just a little deeper… He would pause briefly from time to time and would resume, more of that cold gel—which had actually begun to feel good, soothing—on his finger—or by this time fingers, for he had two of them inside me from what I could tell. And I couldn’t tell much, because the feelings he was giving me were starting to take my thoughts away. He was moving his fingers deeper within me, thrusting slightly, not hard, but firmly. I moaned with pleasure at each of his thrusts, my body feeling incredibly tingly where he touched. I groaned in displeasure as he removed his fingers from me. I felt myself raising myself up a little, as if reaching for him, wanting his fingers back where they had been. I could feel him moving around, heard the sounds of a condom wrapper. I tensed a little, involuntarily. My breath quickened, but it wasn’t with fear, but with anticipation. The moment was here… and I wanted it, I knew that without any hesitation. My own cock had already grown hard, had responded to the stimulation from behind. And I knew his had been hard for a long time… I shivered a little at that thought, at the thought of all the restrained passion that had been building in him. He noticed, I knew he did—he paid very close attention to my reactions, didn’t miss a twitch! He placed one warm hand on me, caressing me slightly, acknowledging that shiver.

I could feel the shift in his body as he leaned a little forward, allowing just the tip of his cock to touch my ass, allowing it to rest lightly against my opening. My breath quickened even more. And perhaps there was just a little fear mixing with the anticipation. And he knew this also, for his hands rubbed me gently, massaging my ass, working loose any tension. As soon as my breathing began to slow a little, telling him I was relaxing again, he pushed the tip of his cock inside me—just a little, couldn’t have been more than just the very end, not even the whole head. I gasped a bit, but I didn’t pull away. But I did tense, that I knew. And if I hadn’t known, I would have been able to tell from his sudden gasp as my muscles closed around him. His own breathing quickened, and I could hear him struggling to get his own body to relax. I could feel that he wanted to be inside me, to thrust himself all the way in, to the hilt… But I could also feel that he was not going to do that, not yet. He would keep his promise to me; he would not rush.

He held there for a few moments, his hands gently massaging my ass, rubbing in a rhythmic up and down motion, kneading into my muscles. I could hear him calming, hear his own breathing slowing again, as I felt mine do the same. As soon as he felt that change in me, he pushed himself a little further inside me. He moaned as he did so, it was a sound that was almost anguish. I moaned with him, both from the pain and the pleasure that accompanied his push. Once again, my breath quickened and my muscles tensed and closed tightly around him. “Oh God!” the words seemed ripped from him, breathless. I had no idea how far inside me he was. I couldn’t tell, I couldn’t feel that—all I could feel was that burning, tingling mixture of pain and pleasure as he filled me with his cock.

This time he pulled back slightly, just a very slight bit, then pushed himself back in—not penetrating any deeper, just going to that spot he had already reached. He repeated these small, gentle thrusts and I could hear his breathing, short and hot, could feel the tension in his body as he fought to restrain himself. I was nearly beside my self at this point. My breathing was in time with his movements. I could feel my body warring with itself as I both wanted to pull away from the pain of his penetration while at the same time I wanted to push back against him, to take him deeper within me.

Either he sensed my reaction, or he could restrain himself no more. With a groan that seemed to come from the very depth of him, he pushed himself all the way inside me. I cried out in pain and I felt him stop, felt him about to pull back, to ease the pain he knew I felt. He had said he would stop if I didn’t like what he was doing. I felt a swift wave of fear sweep over me. No! I didn’t want him to stop! “No, dont!” I cried as I reached around behind him, my hand clutching at his ass, keeping him from pulling back, ending up by pulling him closer, further into me.

“God, Luc!” he gasped as I grabbed at him. He repeated the words several times as he pulled back and pushed forward, thrusting as gently as he could—I could still feel him holding back, being as gentle as possible with me. I moaned with each thrust, still not sure whether I wanted to pull a way or push into him. I felt like every nerve ending in my ass were on fire—but it was a fire that burned good, so hot and so good! I felt myself moving against him, matching his rhythm, but in opposite time. As he thrust forward, I pushed back against him, begging his cock to touch just a little deeper inside me each time. My own cock was throbbing now, and the mixture of stimulation was overwhelming. I didn’t know what I was feeling, I was just a throbbing mass of arousal. I could feel sounds coming from my mouth, feeling the air, feeling the vibration in my throat—but my ears had stopped hearing, the blood rush in my head making me all but deaf.

His thrusts quickened, his hands gripped my hips now, holding me firmly against him, helping me keep my rhythm. I was vaguely aware that his fingers were digging into my skin, vaguely aware of that pain, of that slight distraction. But only vaguely. I could hear my voice now, even over the rushing in my ears, I was crying out to him, begging him for more, pleading with him to go deeper, harder, faster… I had completely abandoned myself to him. I wanted all of him, I wanted him to be in my body, to be part of my body. My own fingers were clutching the comforter so tightly I could feel my nails digging into the fabric, nearly ripping the threads from the force. My body was all but convulsing from the shock waves of heat that rippled through every nerve. And I could feel his body tensing, feel the pressure in him building. Then I felt his body release, the tension flowing from him as I felt him convulse within me, felt him shudder as he pumped his hot fluid into me.

He all but collapsed on top of me, still inside me. He lay there gasping, panting, yet all the while kissing the back of my neck, whispering my name hotly against my skin. He pulled himself from me and moved off of me and I felt cold, empty. An involuntary whimper passed my lips. I wanted him back, wanted the heat from his body against me. I felt him get off the bed. I lay there, my breath little more than sharp pants, the muscles in my body contracting convulsively. It seemed like he was gone forever, but I knew it had to be less than a minute, because my breath had still not calmed, was still coming from me in short pants, though my body had stopped convulsing. I rolled over onto my back as I felt him get on the bed beside me. My hand reached down and I realized with a bit of a shock that I had come as well. The entire feeling had been so intense, so overpowering that I had not even noticed that part of it. I felt like my entire body had come—not just that part! I looked up at him with wonder. How had that man done that to me?

He gently wiped the come from my stomach and from the bed a towel (apparently he had found the bathroom that connected Mark’s room to mine). He lay beside me, propped up on his elbow. He smiled into my eyes as he ran his fingers softly across my chest. He brushed the hair from my eyes tenderly. His fingers seemed to linger over my skin. He bent and kissed me, softly, tenderly, his lips brushing over mine with the lightness of a butterfly’s wings. I put my arms around him, wanting him close. His skin was moist with sweat, as was my own. I returned his kiss, my lips parting, inviting his tongue to dance with mine. The intimacy of this kiss was beyond words. His tongue tangled with mine tenderly, touching me, tasting me. He pulled back after a long, lingering while and smiled down at me. “Remind me, sweetheart, to buy that girl who taught you how to kiss something very nice, will you?”

I grinned at him and he grinned back, kissing the tip of my nose lightly. I laughed. “You know, I really have to pee!” He laughed outright as I tried to manage a “cool” walk to the bathroom—and ended up nearly tripping over my own shoes. Remember, I had been drinking earlier (though THAT was all but worn off by now!) and truly I was very unsteady right now!

When I walked back into the room, Paul was lying on the bed, stretched out, looking so completely comfortable and at home on my bed that my insides just fluttered. I stood there for a moment looking at him. He was truly a fine looking man. I looked at him as I had not looked at him before. Before he had just been either Mark’s friend, or a nice guy to talk to. But now… he was someone that had just awakened something in me that I didn’t knew existed. With one kiss he had changed my life.

He raised one eyebrow and smiled, that slightly tipped smile that made my breath catch in my throat. He didn’t say anything, just patted the bed beside him. I got into bed beside him--actually, I nearly fell into bed beside him, the entire evening was catching up to me. The rush of adrenaline that had shot through my veins as we had made love had held the effects of the alcohol at bay. But that surge was slipping away now, being replaced by a slow spread of warmth through my body, warmth and heaviness.

He pulled me close to him and pulled the comforter over both of us. I laid my head on his chest and rubbed my cheek against his skin. He felt so warm. He put his arms around me. He felt so safe. I felt his lips brush my hair, heard him whisper my name as I drifted away into a world of peace I had thought I would never find again.