For Karine and Country Ch. 01

This is the first part of my first story, inspired by a friend of mine serving in the Canadian army. No sex in this one.

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Now a newly minted Captain, Matt Young stared out of the bar's window, looking at the rain softly flow down the pane of glass as the night took hold. After what seemed like an eternity, he quietly turned back to the bar and stared down at his drink, stirring it slowly like he would a coffee.

Coffee.

There was something he hoped he wouldn't have to taste for a long time. Weeks of military training led into months, months into years and rarely did he ever wake up to the warm orange glow of the sun. In his opinion, man was not meant to wake up that early, and man was certainly not meant to drink coffee by the gallon. Course, nobody cared, and truth be told, he really didn't give a shit anymore.

Truth be told, he had always fancied the idea of serving his country somehow, but had never seen himself as a soldier. Push came to shove, and with student loans to pay off in an unstable economy, he had jumped for what seemed to the best option at the time. He should have been prouder of his accomplishment. Yet he felt empty. He had nobody to share his accomplishment with. Certainly not her. Certainly not after what had happened.

Her. The girl that had captured his heart, only to break it. At nights, he would dream of her. Her long, flowing hair. Her deep brown eyes. Her smile.

He shivered as he remembered that infectious smile of hers, full of perfect white teeth. He remembered looking up from them to find her staring into him. Not just his eyes. His soul. She stepped forward, pressing her body against his while gliding her arms onto his shoulders. A chill ran down his spine as he felt her breasts press into him. Noticing his awkward reaction, she smiled, then softly pressed her lips onto his as he caressed her long, chestnut hair.

"Hey buddy, you gonna finish that?"

Matt snapped back into the present, and looking down at his drink, noticed that he had been simply stirring and playing with it for the last hour or so. He looked over to the bartender, and nodded.

"Sorry." Matt picked up the drink and looked at it with disdain. Truth be told, he didn't enjoy rum on the rocks... but he did enjoy the momentary respite it gave him from his existence.

The bartender chuckled. "No need to be. No point in buying a drink if you're just going to play with it, though." He went back to wiping his counter, leaving Matt to his own devices.

Not intent on feeling like crap, he took a sip of the rum, and then decided to glance around the bar. It was a fairly classy place, well lit, and friendly. On the far wall, there were some booths, and their padded seats certainly seemed more accommodating than the bar stool he was sitting on.

Grabbing his green beret in one hand, and his drink and phone in the other, he got up, and paced over to the second last booth from the door where he sat down. He stared at the washrooms in the back and grimaced. That was where it had all ended for him. He had walked out of that bar that Friday night, five years ago and into the army the next day.

"Don't lie, you didn't join to serve, you joined to get away." He tried to silence the voice in his head, but it was true. She had betrayed him. She had walked away from everything they knew that night, and he had just broken under the immediate weight of what had happened.

The door opened, and the wind blew in. Matt was glad for a moment that he had chosen to bring his rain jacket along. Granted, the thing was made of rubber and it smelled due to the waterproofing... but it worked. He heard steps coming down the aisle. They sounded like women's shoes. That, or clickers, the metal plates on the bottom of some soldier's boots. But there wasn't a base for hundreds of kilometres-

His train of thought was quickly and thoroughly derailed when a tall brunette sat on the bench seat across from him. He had imagined this day for years on end, but never thought that it would happen. What were the chances of that, he thought. Now, in all his bewilderment, he could only ask,

"Karine?"

"No, it's Santa Claus," The brunette replied. She smirked. "Of course it's me."

Matt leaned back into the padding and gave her the once over. She seemed to look exactly like she did five years ago, except she now wore her hair down, cut femininely to just above her collarbone. He noticed she was soaking wet, then remembered, somewhat belatedly, that there was a rainstorm outside.

"You should really take that jacket off."

"I should." She replied, and she pulled the jacket off of her shoulders, and slid it out from behind her back. She straightened out her clothes, and Matt couldn't help but stare at the swell of her breasts as the cotton blouse struggled to contain them. She wasn't that well endowed, by any means, but she was very well proportioned. Matt smiled at the fond memory, moments before a darker one replaced it.

"How have you been?" he asked. As long as they kept to the banter and not the heavy stuff, they'd walk out with some sanity left.

"I've been fine," she said impatiently.

It was her turn to look him up and down. "Now forget about how I've been, you don't even look like the Matt I knew."

"Being in the army does things to people."

"I can see," Karine said as she took a deep breath. "Matt... about what happened-"

"Not now Karine. Not now."

"But-"

"Please. Just not now. We'll deal with it later," his words coming out forcefully.

Karine didn't look too pleased. "Later? Matt, I've waited for the last five years for this, and you want to wait until later?"

Matt felt that rage rise, the one he had suppressed since that faithful night.

"The last five years, huh? Well do you want to know what I've been doing for these... past... five years, Karine?"

Karine's aggressiveness promptly evaporated, and Matt continued, becoming increasingly irate.

"For the past five years, I have been at war, especially with myself. I can't sleep, I take on increasingly risky jobs and throw myself into situations where I'm likely to get killed." His voice started faltering, but he continued.

"When that doesn't work, I go to bars with the guys back at the regiment and I pick up a girl and proceed to fuck her as hard as I can. Sure she comes, sure I come. I try to get back at you for what you did to me. But it doesn't work, and it's all because I still fucking love you."

Karine gasped as he let the silence permeate, then finished off his rant.

"One of these days, I just might take my nine mil, stick it in my mouth, and pull the damn trigger, and end this sad story." Matt was at his breaking point now.

He shot up, and turned towards the door. Karine's face was a look of sheer horror as he turned back, and looked directly into her eyes.

"Go to hell."

By now everybody in the bar was staring at this soldier, dressed in dark green combat uniform, on the verge of a breakdown. He walked as fast as he could out of the bar and into the downpour of the cold night. In his haste, he hadn't taken his rain jacket, but he didn't care. Fumbling with his keys, he pressed the button for the unlock on his car, and got into the driver's seat. He stared forward for what seemed to be an eternity. He then started sobbing uncontrollably, leaning on the steering wheel, pounding on the horn with his fist. His solace was interrupted by a loud banging on his passenger door. He glanced to his right, and unable to make out who it was, didn't respond. The door suddenly thrust open as the sound of thunder echoed through the streets, and standing there, was a rain soaked Karine. They stared at each other for an eternity, unsure of how to proceed. Finally, Matt, having managed to get his outburst under control, looked at the wet and now shivering Karine.

"You're going to get sick. At least get in."

"Okay," said Karine in a voice barely above a whisper as pulled herself into the car. She then looked at him.

If Matt had just been able to pay a bit more attention, he would have noticed the change in Karine's eyes, as if a layer of her armour had been cracked. She started pounding on him with her fists, swinging her arms at him with all her might.

"What the hell are you thinking, you bastard!?! Trying to get yourself killed!?! Thinking of shooting yourself!?! Why the hell would you do that!?!"

Matt yelled back.

"Because you slept with him! Because you threw away everything we had for a cheap thrill! Why the hell wouldn't I want to!?!"

Karine screamed at him. "You didn't do anything wrong! You don't have to live with the consequences of what YOU did! You didn't get shitfaced! You weren't the one that slept with him! You weren't the one that lost your virginity with your boyfriend's best friend in a goddamn washroom stall, and you CERTAINLY weren't the one that miscarried!"

There was an immediate silence in the car, broken only by quiet sobs. Karine pulled herself onto Matt, and he put his arms around her, doing the best to cope with this news, having put his issues aside for this girl who now seemed as much as a victim as he was. The shock of the statement hit him hard. Karine, the Catholic girl, had been pregnant?

Wait, she miscarried? All the assumptions he had made in the previous five years, of her laughing at him for being such a pushover, for not being enough of a man for her, were thrown out the window. It was at this point that the horrific thought entered his mind. He had, in fact, abandoned her and everything they had. Granted, she had cheated, and of her own volition, but in those hours where she was alone, trying to cope with the aftermath, she had nobody to turn to. Surely her parents wouldn't have approved of her being pregnant without being married. She would have become a social pariah. She would have had to deal with the knowledge that it was her fault that everything she held dear had been destroyed. He wasn't sure if he could deal with what she did.

"Oh god," he whispered.

*******************

They arrived outside of a nondescript house north of downtown, on the grounds of what used to be a military base, decommissioned after the end of the Cold War. Though the base was gone, the community was vibrant, sustained by the families of the soldiers who worked at nearby Brigade headquarters. Matt had been lucky to get a nice house on the corner of two quiet streets, and enjoyed the peace and quiet of such an area in what was arguably Canada's biggest city. He pulled up into the driveway, parked the car, and killed the engine. He turned to his right, and saw Karine shivering. He didn't have any towels in the car, and despite the heat, she was shivering uncontrollably. Matt recognized the signs of hypothermia setting in.

"Come on, you can't stay like this. Wait here and I'll help you in."

He got out of the Escape, ran up to his door, unlocked it, and turned around to see Karine, shivering, but with a quiet smile on her face.

"I can take care of myself, you know. I always have been."

Karine had once been a tomboy, and the memory of the tall and awkward girl that he grew up with gave Matt a momentary smile. Regardless, he still took her hand, and walked her inside.

Karine was actually surprised at how clean and ordered the place was, especially since as far as she knew, he lived alone. Doubt ran through her mind. Maybe he didn't. He was a decent guy, and a lot of girls wouldn't mind having a soldier as their-

She killed the thought as fast as she could.

"Bathroom's down the hall, to the right. There are towels in the washroom, I'll grab some of the extras from the linen closet, and see if I can't scrounge up something for you to wear. Throw your clothes into the hamper, and I'll dry them."

Shivering cold, she didn't have much of an option. She walked into the washroom, and began to strip down. She threw her clothes into the laundry hamper, making sure that her pockets were empty, first of all; she didn't think Matt would be too happy to see a pen explode in his laundry.

Turning towards the shower, she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Nothing she saw in the mirror was new, but there was a chill in her spine, an unknown feeling of trepidation.

Vulnerability.

She was vulnerable.

Stepping into the shower, she moaned in relief as the hot water cascaded down onto her head, following her every curve, warming her body. She noticed Matt had one of those fancy soap dispensers in the shower, and pressed the button for body wash.

As she soaped up and cleaned herself off, she felt a twinge of desire, a yearning for something more. Her eyes slowly closed, and her hands began to slide across her body, closer to her warmth. She softly caressed the slit between her legs, moaning softly as she smelled the warm, flowery scent of the body wash-

Wait, body wash? What kind of a soldier uses flower scented body wash? Her eyes shot open, and she stood up straight and inspected the soap dispenser.

Conditioner? Okay, there was definitely a woman living here. With this realization, Karine's shoulders slumped, and her hopes and fantasies had fallen apart. Why didn't Matt mention her? Were they fuckbuddies? Was she his girlfriend and he had just not brought her up in his outburst? These questions filled her mind for the remainder of her time in the shower.

When she finally got out of the shower, she dried her body with the extra towels- Wait, extra towels? Her attention was then diverted to a neatly folded pile of clothes on the counter, next to the sink. Matt had entered? She turned to the hamper and looked down into it. It was empty. Apparently the army had taught Matt how to be a sneaky bastard. She was mortified as soon as she realized he had been in there. Was she so preoccupied that she didn't notice him? Did he see her?

Did she want him to see her?

He had left a tan t-shirt and pants for her to wear. On closer inspection, these pants were similar to Matt's uniform pants, but in a desert colour. She pulled the tan t-shirt over her head and onto her body. It was tight, and the shirt left no question that she wasn't wearing a bra, outlining and accentuating every curve straight down to her hips. This was not his shirt. Did it belong to the other woman? Nevertheless, it fit, and it made her feel damn sexy, something she hadn't felt in a very long time. Heck, they weren't even hers and she felt kinda naughty. The pants, however, were another matter, as she realized she threw her panties into the hamper. Not willing to embarrass herself, she decided to go commando, and hoped Matt wouldn't notice. Again, these were too small to belong to Matt... so did this mean the other woman was a soldier too? Someone who would understand his motivations, and offer a comfort based on mutual exper-

She sighed as she pulled on the combat pants, and did up the buttons and zipper. She looked into the mirror. She'd have to find a hairdryer.

*******************

Matt was in the kitchen, trying to do something to keep his sanity. For five years, he had been expecting this confrontation, the one that never happened. He would spend nights, looking up at sky, whether it be from his backyard, the bases he had been transferred to one after another, or Afghanistan itself.

Afghanistan. Now there was a place that he never wanted to go back to. But, in his time there, one thing that he did in fact miss about the place was the sky. Countless stars dotted the night sky, a beauty in a land that had seen none for a very long time. In a way Afghanistan was symbolic of his inner conflict. A simple, clear cut situation, that had gotten increasingly complicated. Canada was in Afghanistan. But Karine was his battle, and his alone.

Matt stirred the pot of soup on the stove, and tried to find some Ramen noodles to throw into the mix. Years of being a soldier had forced him to improvise, lest he deal with army rations. Instead of Ramen noodles, all he could find was a can of hot chocolate, bought years ago, never used, and probably still good. He put the kettle onto the stove, and pulled two mugs out of the cupboard, putting them down onto the counter.. He took off his combat shirt, so that he was only wearing his dry t-shirt, and threw the wet thing onto a chair. With all immediate tasks taken care of, he settled into his thoughts once again as he slowly stirred the soup, hoping that it wasn't burning on the bottom.

Karine had been wet and was going to get sick... she needed somewhere to dry off and warm up. He remembered basic training, where... what was his name... Simmons? Simon? Whatever it was, buddy had gotten ill after falling into a creek in the field. But she could have gone back to wherever she was living, right? He could have driven her there, right? Why did he drive her back to his place? Unless he wanted to... No. As much as he found Karine attractive, it wasn't something he would do. He just wanted to get things worked out and do in home court... right, yes, that would be the reason. Not that she was attractive...

Matt's internal conflict was interrupted by Karine's entry. From behind the counter he couldn't help but feel a twinge of desire in his groin for this girl. Very few women manage to look good in uniform. Karine had managed to make the baggy combat uniform pants and t-shirt look very, very good.

Karine was the first to break their silence. "Hey there, soldier boy." She cracked a smile.

"Hey there soldier girl."

"How do I look?"

"Dressed to kill."

"Literally or figuratively?"

"Well, you seem to have the guns for it." He motioned to her arms. She giggled as she pretended to flex.

"Well, I've been working out."

"So I see. Take a seat, soup should be ready in a bit."

Karine walked up and sat at the counter, directly opposite of Matt, who seemed to be taking this pot of soup a little too seriously. Her hair was done up in a ponytail, with her bangs hanging down and to the sides of her face, dry. She had found the hairdryer that he had forgotten to take out. Then again, he didn't want to be in there too long, lest something awkward happen. Karine finally spoke up. "You know how to cook?"

"No, I can't cook for shit. Jacalyn does that." The room got quiet, once again. Karine's poorly suppressed concerns broke free and Matt could see this on her face, as she tensed up. Desperate to contain the situation, he rushed the words out of his mouth.

"Jacalyn's... Jacalyn's my roommate."

"Your roommate?"

"Yeah. She was a sniper, I was her spotter and after we got back she got posted as a recruiter, and I as staff... so we decided to split a place, better than living in the singles quarters." Matt saw Sara relax, and silently thanked the gods.

"Are you two... involved?" It was Matt's turn to tense up. He scratched the nape of his neck with his left hand, and then replied.

"We... we saw a lot over in Afghanistan. War bonds people in certain ways, but you know... we just wanted to stay alive. Once we were sent home, the army made our company stopover in Cyprus and take five days decompression...

Matt flashed back to the night where he and Jacalyn got wasted at a Cypriot bar. He remembered how he had grabbed her and kissed her outside of their hotel. He remembered her ripping his uniform off in his room and assaulting his mouth with her tongue. He remembered the heat and tightness of her cunt as he entered her after months of mutual celibacy and how she had moaned as he bottomed out.

"And?"

He remembered thrusting in and out of her cunt as she screamed in ecstasy, driving her hips against his as hard as she could, desperate for more of his cock as he grabbed and played with her D cup tits. Then he remembered the heat building up, and his orgasm... where he shot his load into her sopping wet pussy, thrusting as deep as he could into her to fill her with his seed; collapsing on top of her.