Forbidden Feelings Ch. 12-13

"She'll have a Raspberry Smirnoff," I cut in.

"No, water's good," Leah repeated glancing at me, "that's what you're getting."

"Leah, I'm having water because I choose not to drink. That doesn't mean that you can't drink," I explained, "besides, you may feel more comfortable with some alcohol."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Leah nodded, giving in, and then turned back to Lexi, "any Smirnoff is good. Just not watermelon or pineapple."

"Got it," Lexi said as she winked at Leah, "be right back."

"You two better behave yourselves," Austin smiled at us as he used his pointer and middle finger to illustrate I've got my eyes on you, while Lexi pulled him up the ramp by his shirt sleeve.

"You really don't mind?" Leah questioned after Lexi and Austin were out of sight.

"Mind what?" I asked back, confused.

"If we drink in front of you," Leah responded.

"Oh hell no," I replied, "like I said, before, it's a choice I made for myself, not for other people. However, I just might take your keys away, if I feel I need to."

Leah smiled at me as she knew from my tone of voice that I was teasing her. God, I loved her smile.

"Okay," she responded laughing, "I'll try not to drink too much then."

As I stood there next to Leah, I crossed my arms. I really wanted to wrap my arms around her, but I wasn't sure if she was ready for that yet.

"Thank you for coming with us this weekend," I said due to not knowing what else to say.

"Well, thanks for the invite," Leah replied.

"Anytime Babe," I responded, winking at her, just as Lexi and Austin came back with the drinks.

"So, Leah, is it nice getting away from your kids every once in a while?" Lexi asked as the drinks were handed off.

"Well, I don't want to say, I enjoy it," Leah replied, trying to find the right words, "but, yeah, it's pretty nice."

"You don't get out much, do you?" Austin retorted raising his beer glass to her, as we all chuckled.

"Not at all!" Leah exclaimed as she tapped his bottle with hers before they both took a drink.

We turned out attention to the stage as the band walked out and started playing. Leah moved closer to me and I took a chance by wrapping my left arm around her shoulder. I felt her wince, so I started to move it off, but she shook her head implying that it was really okay. We stood like that for a few moments, just watching the band.

After the first song ended and we applauded, Leah turned toward me.

"Those two girls in front of us," she whispered and used her chin to point, "are they lesbians?"

I turned my gaze to where Leah was looking and saw two females; the brunette had her arm around the redhead's body, resting in the back pocket of the redhead's jeans, while the redhead had her hand resting on the brunette's lower back.

"If I had to guess, I would say yes," I responded, wishing that by the end of the night, Leah and I would be that close.

"They look so happy together," Leah said.

"I know exactly how they feel," I replied as I brought my arm further down, reaching Leah's jeans.

"I bet you do," Leah teased me as my hand slipped into her back pocket.

She wrapped one of her arms around me, and turned towards me to rest her head on my chest, near my collar bone. As I placed my chin on Leah's head, I caught Lexi's glance. She smiled and nodded at me as if saying, see everything worked out. I pulled Leah closer to my body and stood there, watching the band as they continued to play.

When the song was finished, Leah raised her bottle of Smirnoff to her lips and drank what little was left. I lowered my mouth to her ear.

"Do you want another one?" I asked.

"No," she moaned as I nibbled on her ear lobe.

I had to tighten my arms around her because I felt her going limp from my torture.

"Hey, are we allowed to come back in if we go outside," Leah inquired, pulling away from me as the next song began.

"I think so," I answered, "I mean, we may need to get our hand stamped. Why?"

"Can we go outside then?" Leah asked as she looked up at me.

"Sure," I responded before turning toward Lexi and Austin, "we'll be right back."

Lexi nodded to me as I took Leah's hand and led her up the ramp, through the crowd. When we reached the front doors, the bouncer already had the stamp out. We both presented our left hand to him, and after we got stamped, we exited.

The air was cool and although there was a slight breeze, the temperature wasn't bad. I led Leah toward the nearest bench, and we sat down.

"So what's up?" I asked.

"I'm sorry," Leah replied, "I just needed to get out for a few. It's very overwhelming."

"You okay?" I questioned as I turned to face my date.

"Yeah, I am. Surprisingly. I just needed some fresh air."

Leah leaned her head against my shoulder, and I wrapped my arms around her.

"Leah, if you don't want to go back in that's fine. I know it's hard for you to be out of your comfort zone," I said.

"I thought I'd be okay. I tried, I really did," Leah answered, "I'm so sorry."

"You're fine. I'm the one that should be apologizing," I said, "I'm the one who asked you to come. I knew what this would be like for you."

"But, you did warn me," she reminded me.

"Yes, I did, and you still came. And, look at us now. You cuddled into me inside, surrounded by people, and here, outside, I still have my arms wrapped around you," I explained as I kissed the top of her head, "Two weeks ago, you wouldn't have allowed me to be this close to you in public. You have changed Leah, you really have."

"How do you think Lexi and Austin feel about this?" Leah asked, "I mean, they both know Gabe, and you're cheating on their friend."

"They were my friends first, and while I'm sure they are disappointed in my actions, they are very aware how happy you make me," I answered.

I couldn't tell if Leah was satisfied with my answer, so I added, "Besides, Lexi is going to really enjoy tonight with Austin. He loves the fact that two girls are kissing in front of him, but Lexi's the only one that he can take his excitement out on. Oh yes, she will definitely enjoy it later on."

I heard Leah laugh and I smiled along with her.

"I love you," Leah whispered just barely audible.

"Hey," I whispered back and placed my right hand under Leah's chin. I made her raise her eyes to meet mine. "I love you too."

I kissed her forehead, and then the tip of her nose, and finally her lips.

"Are you ready to go back inside?" Leah asked once my lips left hers, "I could go for another drink right about now."

"If you want to, or I can sit out here all night with you in my arms," I replied.

"Or we can go in, and finish watching Katherine's gig, which is the reason we came, and you can wrap your arms around me inside," Leah stated.

"It's a reason we came, but is it the true reason we came?" I teased.

"Let's go!" Leah said as she stood up and reached for my hand.

We headed back inside, this time Leah led me in. I followed her to the bar and she ordered another Smirnoff. I paid for Leah's, as well as another beer each for Lexi and Austin. Then we made our way back to our spot on the ramp and I handed off the two beers.

As I leaned back against the wall, Leah stood with her back against my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and rested my chin on her head to watch the rest of the show.

XIII

When the show was over, the four of us took a slow walk to the car so that we would miss most of the traffic. We got into the car and made our way back to the hotel as Leah almost fell asleep on my shoulder.

After parking, we made our way up to the rooms and decided to meet downstairs at ten thirty the next morning to check out and grab some brunch before we headed home. Then we went into our rooms.

I used my key card to open the door, and let Leah enter first before locking the door behind me. Leah was still standing close to me, so I reached for her and brought my mouth to meet hers. I softly pushed her against the closed door as my hands went up and down her arms, caressing her. She moaned into my mouth and her arms wrapped around my body.

The thought of Leah's body trapped against the wall made me hotter, so I decided to test her limits, but I wasn't sure how'd she react. I let my hands slowly trail her arms and when I reached her wrists behind me, I grabbed them and pinned them above her head. I held them up with only my left hand, while my right reached under Leah's shirt and assaulted her breasts through her bra.

I felt her melting into me, so I tested her submissiveness further. I used my knee to roughly part her legs and I felt her grinding against my thigh, which made me even hotter.

"Oh God, Leah, I want to taste you so bad," I growled into her mouth.

"Well, what's stopping you?" she teased.

I couldn't dominate her anymore; I wanted her as an equal, not as a submissive. Maybe someday we could explore that, but not tonight.

I let her hands go and guided her further into the room. As we made our way to the bed, we undressed each other, leaving a trail of clothes on the floor.

I laid her down and my tongue went back to exploring her mouth. My left hand helped hold some of my weight, while my right caressed a line from Leah's chin, slowly heading south. As soon as my fingers grazed her hot, wet core, Leah moaned and I knew she was very close. She moved her hands to my back and very sensually used her fingertips to rub my back. It was driving me insane, but I wanted to see her climax before I did.

My lips left her mouth and kissed a trail to her throat, as I let two of my slender fingers enter her. She was soaked and I knew it would not take much for her to orgasm. I moved my lips up her neck until I reached a sensitive spot just below her ear lobe. Leah's hands on my back tightened as her body was sent over the edge. As she climaxed, I placed my thumb on her clitoris, which made her orgasm more powerful. My fingers didn't let up as I moved my lips down her body. As soon as I kissed her core, and my tongue rubbed against her now extra-sensitive clitoris, Leah's body shook with another orgasm.

"Stop...please..." Leah said breathlessly as I licked her sweet nectar, "I can't...take...anymore."

I slowly removed my mouth and fingers from her body, and moved up on the bed so that I could hold my woman in my arms. I used my right hand to caress her ear like she had done to me that first week. She let out a sigh of approval as her body went into a relaxed state.

"You like this, huh?" I asked about rubbing her ear.

"Uh-huh. It was a calming method my mom used when I was younger," Leah replied.

"You do it to Madison and Samuel now, don't you?" I inquired.

"Yeah, how'd you know?" Leah questioned softly.

"I guessed when you did it to me," I answered, "it does really works."

"Uh-huh," she said as her body relaxed.

After a while of just lying there, Leah moved out of my arms and straddled my body. She leaned down on my lips to kiss me before she moved her lips to my neck.

"Oh God," I stuttered as a moan escaped my lips.

In the heat of the moment, I started grinding myself against Leah's body on top of mine.

"Don't worry about that, Babe, I'll be taking quite good care of you," Leah whispered as she kissed my neck.

Her lips moved down my body to my breasts. She brought my left nipple into her mouth before using her right hand on my other. The way she sucked on my nipple, teasing it with her tongue, I could feel my body building to a climax.

As if Leah could sense it too, she moved her body off mine and slowly kissed a trail to my heated core. This woman was amazing, and I knew it would only be seconds before I lost control of my body, and I was right...

As soon as Leah's tongue touched my clit, my whole body started trembling. Leah gently sucked on me and just as two of her fingers entered me, my muscles contracted around her and my body was brought to orgasm. I had no choice but to turn my head onto the pillow as I muffled a scream because of the earth shattering experience. And yet, Leah didn't let up the sweet torture of my body.

I barely hit the bottom of my first before another wave washed over me, and then a third.

I couldn't take anymore, my clitoris was becoming too sensitive. I couldn't even speak to stop Leah. With really weak arms, I pulled her up my body and she brought her lips to my mouth. As she kissed me, I tasted myself on her.

"A...maz..ing," I said breathlessly as I willed my body to calm down.

Leah smiled at me and then laid down next to me, placing her head on my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and held her close. My fingers caressed my bracelet that Leah now wore. As our bodes started to relax, we both closed our eyes.

Just as I was about to fall asleep, my left arm did. Since it was wrapped around Leah, I didn't want to wake her, but it was going numb.

"Hey," I whispered as I kissed the top of Leah's head, "are you asleep?"

"Uh-huh," she replied sounding half awake.

"Can you roll over, and I'll hold you?" I asked, "my arm is falling asleep."

"Uh-huh," she responded again, but instead of turning over, she held on to me tighter.

"Well then, this'll have to do for now," I laughed to myself and kissed her head again, "good night sweetheart."

I tried to forget about my numbing arm as I too fell asleep.

----------

When I woke up Sunday morning, it was still dark in the hotel room. I rolled over and saw Leah still sleeping next to me. Her left wrist lat inches from her face, as she was lying on her side. I softly began caressing the bracelet I had given her and my thoughts drifted to my sister.

"Good morning," I heard Leah say and I was quickly brought back to the present.

I gazed up at her and I felt my eyes water.

"What's wrong?" Leah asked confused as she kissed my forehead.

"I was just thinking about Jaime and the day we bought these," I replied as I continued to trace along the bracelet, "it's kind of a funny story though, I guess. On the day we bought them, I had just been dumped by my boyfriend. We had been dating for two months and back then that was forever. He was the love of my life, or so I thought."

Leah and I shared a moment of laughter at my younger, immature self.

"Anyway, I was hurt and Jaime gave me some retail therapy and made me go shopping with her on the boardwalk instead of going to the beach that day. We found these bracelets and she bought them. When we put them on, we made a vow to each other that no matter what happens, what life throws at us, we will always be there for each other; always no further than a phone call away."

Tears started forming in my eyes again and Leah sat up to wipe them away.

"Thank you for sharing that," Leah whispered.

"Hang on, there's more," I responded as I took some deep breaths, "just give me a second."

"Take your time," Leah nodded and ran her hand through my hair.

I sat up next to her and held her wrist, turning the bracelet around and around.

"We got these specific ones because they slip on. The other ones we liked tied onto our wrists, but with these, there is no beginning; no end. Jaime wanted to use these bracelets as a symbol of our love for each other.

"Of course, after the accident, I had quite a few choice words for my sister for leaving me," I continued with tears pouring down my face. I had never been this open to anyone, Gabriel included. "It took me months to finally accept that she was gone."

"But she's with you, in you," Leah said as she placed her hand under my chin to make me look up at her.

"I know. And, I've learned that although I can't pick up the phone and call her, she is still available twenty-four seven," I responded.

"And remember," Leah added, pointing to both treasures, "these are just objects. The love that you have for each other is inside."

Leah placed her hand, palm down, on my heart.

"I know," I nodded and smiled in agreement before giving my woman a quick kiss, "but I actually brought this all up to make a point. When I saw you sleeping next to me, wearing the gift I gave you, I thought about the vow that Jaime and I made to each other and how I feel the same way toward you. The wrists the bracelets lay on may have changed, but the vow is still the same. When I look at both of our wrists, I can't help but think of something else that we both wear that has no beginning, no end."

"Wedding rings," Leah said.

I nodded as she used her thumb to twirl her ring around on her finger; even though the divorce was being processed already, she still wore the band.

"Wait. What are you trying to say?" Leah asked sounding unsure of my answer.

"I think you know what I'm trying to say, Leah," I responded as I brushed her hair away from her face, "I love you Leah; there is nothing that will ever change that. I know we really have to sit down and talk about this, and now isn't the time, but I love you. If we can figure something out, I'd love you to be the one I come home to at night. I want to be the one to kiss you goodbye in the morning and before you go to sleep."

"It's not just me in this package you know," Leah stated.

"I love Madison and Samuel as well. I want to share every joy and happiness along with every tear and sadness. I don't want to be another parent in their life; they already have two that love them endlessly. But, I love them too."

We sat in silence for a few minutes, before I looked over at the clock.

"Listen, like I said this is not the time or place," I began, "plus we really need to start getting ready for breakfast."

"Yea, your right," Leah replied as she also looked at the clock and then stood up, "I'm going to grab a quick shower."

I nodded to her and she grabbed her toiletries bag from her suitcase and went to the bathroom to get ready.

I figured that I was going to take a shower when I got home, so I wasn't worried about it now. I took my time getting ready and used the sink outside the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. I heard the water in the shower stop just as I finished getting dressed. I sat down on the edge of the bed and turned on the TV while I waited for Leah to get done.

Leah came out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel, and as she passed me I reached for her hand and brought her closer to me.

"I'm going to talk to Gabriel." I said to her.

"Wait. What?" Leah asked.

"Listen Leah, I'm thinking of the future, and I can't see Gabriel with me. All I want is to be with you and Samuel and Madison," I explained, standing up.

"But its wrong," Leah responded.

"It's not wrong. Taboo, probably, but how can something that feels so right be wrong?" I asked her.

"He's going to hate me," Leah said, ignoring my question.

"No he won't. If anything, I'll be the one he hates," I replied placing my hands on her face.

"I started all of this, it's my fault," Leah interjected.

"Leah, stop," I embraced her, "everything will be okay, I promise. I just have to talk to Gabriel. You and Travis are going through a divorce, and I want to be there one hundred percent for you, and in order to do that I have to commit myself one hundred percent to you. I'm not saying you and I are ready to take the next step, but I want to be ready for when we are."

I felt Leah nod into my shoulder as I rubbed her back.

"Now, on that note," I smiled trying to break the tension, "finish getting ready before Austin gets too many ideas about what's taking us so long."

"Oh guys..." Leah laughed before leaving my arms.