Freedom of Trade

Lance gulped as he examined the documents presented to him. Yes, he had heard of them. There were several well renowned stock reclamation companies, whose reputation for ruthlessness and unwillingness to compromise in pursuit of their clients' interests was second only to that of debt collectors. And Holden, Merriweather & Buchner represented only those wealthier clients who had no time for complicated pleas of innocence and were indifferent to what methods might be employed. Like debt collectors, they were literally above the law, but only in the sense that the law of the land was deliberately framed in such a way that just as the wealthiest citizens were never liable for tax and no serving politician could be charged with corruption, those employed to serve the interests of free trade and enforcing debt liability could do almost anything they liked to serve their clients' needs.

"I don't understand," said Lance, aware that no argument he made could possibly persuade these gentlemen to relent. "I did everything correctly. I even took out Liability Insurance..."

"Well, that's no use to you in the present circumstances, sir."

"Can you at least tell me what mistake I made?"

"Well," said the blond man as he consulted his notes. "We're most certainly not obliged to tell you anything of course. However, I can see that there was an irregularity not so much with your purchase but with the one made by GirlsULike. As you must be aware there is a chain of suppliers between you and the ultimate source, whose identity is as much a mystery to me as it is to you. Somewhere along the line, Candy was purchased by my client but was also sold on to another supplier. Very irregular, you must agree."

"Yes, I suppose so. Do you know who the client is?"

The larger man snorted angrily. "That isn't the kind of information we're at liberty to divulge," he said. "Let's stop wasting our time, sir. We want to collect the goods and leave."

"Certainly. Of course," said Lance nervously. "Am I entitled to any compensation for my loss?"

"Not from us, sir," said the blond man. "You'll have to take that up with GirlsULike. Unless of course you're insured against this kind of thing."

"Errm..."

"Just let us in, sir," said the larger man. "Yours isn't the only house we're scheduled to visit tonight."

Lance had no choice but to let the two representatives from Holden, Merriweather & Buchner in through his front door.

"We would prefer that you didn't accompany us while we collect the goods, sir," said the blond haired man. "First of all, where is the girl?"

Lance gestured up the stairs. "Second door on the left," he said. "Candy will be on the bed. She won't have any clothes on, I'm afraid."

"Don't worry about that, sir," said the blond man as his larger colleague thundered up the stairs. "We have no interest in reclaiming subsidiary items that you've paid for either yourself or as part of the service provided by GirlsULike. We're only interested in the girl. In fact, we prefer them naked. It makes our job easier. Now, if you could excuse me, sir."

The blond man followed his colleague up the stairs, while Lance hovered around in the hallway, feeling both impotent and strangely violated. His main concern was what compensation, if any, he'd get from GirlsULike, especially now he'd been told that his Liability Insurance didn't cover the current situation.

From upstairs, he first heard some startled screaming, followed by the blond man's more measured reassuring words. For a moment, there was almost silence from upstairs. Then came a series of more screams accompanied by angry shouts that must have come from the bald muscular gentleman. This continued for several minutes while Lance continued to stand alone, uncertain whether to stay where he was or pretend to busy himself elsewhere. Perhaps he could raid the fridge and put together a sandwich. But as it was he maintained his ground while letting his imagination wander as sounds came from his second bedroom that could have been almost anything.

It was nearly half an hour later that Candy was dragged downstairs, totally naked and in handcuffs and chains. One of her eyes was bruised and swelling, and from both eyes there was a stream of tears over her cheeks and onto her bare bosom. Lance caught a last glimpse of Candy's face before the representatives from Holden, Merriweather & Buchner dragged her out of his house and into the white van they had parked outside with the company's impressive Royal Crest and Latin motto adorning the bonnet and sides.

And Lance had never in his entire life before seen so much misery, dread and fear etched on a person's terrified face as he did on Candy's in that brief glimpse.

It was so unlike the image of a smiling, acquiescent and enthusiastic sex worker that GirlsULike had advertised and, in a sense, promised.

"Yes, we understand your problem, sir," said the call centre operator from GirlsULike when Lance made the phone call and navigated his way through all the options to the one most like his case. The woman on the other end of the phone had a weary patient voice very different from the enthusiastic upbeat voice of the salesman from which he'd originally purchased Candy. "However, your insurance doesn't fully cover your loss and the compensation we are legally obliged to offer you is only 40% of your original purchase price."

"Only 40%!" Lance wailed.

"You've had possession of your purchase for more than the 28 days trial period and the terms by which you lost possession do not meet any of the prescribed conditions," the call-centre voice continued. "However, we can offer you several options, sir."

"And what are they?"

"Well, the first and simplest is to provide you with another indentured sex worker who is worth rather less than the original cost price. As a special offer to a loyal customer, we can offer a girl worth up to 55% of the price you paid. However, she isn't going to be even nearly the same quality as your original purchase who was called...erm...Candy. She won't be as much to your satisfaction as Candy was."

"What would such a girl be like?"

"It's unlikely she'd be a girl as such, unless she's damaged in some way..."

"Damaged?"

"Disabled. Amputated limbs. Facial or genital injuries. Somewhat worse than plain. Nonetheless, GirlsULike prides itself on the quality of its merchandise, so she's unlikely to be a girl and more likely to be a woman. And at that price she's unlikely to be much younger than you are, sir."

Lance didn't like the idea of that at all. What was the point in buying an indentured sex worker who was about the same age as his wife would be? Or, worse, some kind of deformed freak?

"What are the other options?"

"Well, the next easiest option is that we simply reimburse you for 40% of the cost of the original procurement. You'll have nothing else to show for it except the memory of your initial purchase."

"And the other options?"

"There's only one other, sir, and that is that we take the compensation cost of 55% and you can pay extra on top of that to choose another girl. Perhaps another 'Candy', sir, if that's a name you particularly like."

"And can I insure against similar problems in the future if I do so?"

"It's funny you should say that, sir," said the call-centre voice. "We do have a new Platinum Premium Insurance Scheme that bundles Liability Insurance in with other products that will protect you in future."

"And if I pay 45% of the original price plus the extra insurance, I can have a girl just like Candy?"

"Subject to availability, of course, sir. Shall I pass you over to a Sales Representative?"

"Yes, of course," said Lance, who realised once again that he'd agreed to pay substantially more than he'd originally anticipated.

But such was the penalty of living in a free society and one which Lance would rather face any day than any of the altogether unpalatable alternatives.