Fuckbugs

"That's not normal, Allie."

"I know. I think it's a hormonal thing." She sighs and closes her eyes. "I'm too tired to worry about it right now. I need a hot shower."

"Good idea."

I start unrolling some paper towels. Allie heads for the bathroom, leaving wet footprints on the ground.

"You know - it's funny." Allie glances over her shoulder, smiling wearily. "I actually feel like I just had sex!"

* * *

I clean the mess while Allie takes a shower. I'm on my hands and knees, wiping her creamy discharge off the hardwood floor.

For some reason, I'm sexually aroused again.

That was a traumatic experience, I tell myself. It shouldn't turn me on. But I'm hyper-aware of my body - my thighs rubbing together, for instance - as I'm crawling around.

Allie's cream gives off a strange, metallic odor. It looks perfectly smooth and white, but I can feel a grainy texture as I'm wiping it up. Looking closely at the paper towel, I see dozens of translucent specks within the thick fluid. Each speck is smaller than a grain of rice, almost impossible to notice unless you're looking for it.

Insect eggs, I realize. Of course.

Allie just gave birth to hundreds of baby fuckbugs.

There's no way I can pick up every single egg. As I wipe up the cream, some of them disappear between the wooden floorboards. Others simply escape my notice. They're just too small.

The dogs, getting bolder, are trying to lick the floor. I wave my paper towel roll at them.

"Shoo!" I cry. "That's gross. Don't lick that!"

The couch cushions are even harder to clean. The fabric is soaking wet and covered with tiny eggs. As I start to scrub it, I feel anxiety rising in my chest. Allie's sweatpants are infested, I tell myself. The whole apartment is probably infested...

By the time Allie steps out of the bathroom, I'm breathing hard and wiping furiously.

"God, I feel so much better!" she declares.

Allie is naked except for a towel, looking calm and refreshed. As I look at her, my anxiety melts away. She's running her fingers through her wet hair, smiling at me.

"Emily, that mess is mine!" She laughs lightly. "Why are you cleaning it up?"

I can't help smiling. "You used to clean my apartment all the time!"

"Listen," she says, "we've been through enough stress today." She looks around her messy living room. "Is it okay if I sleep on your couch tonight?"

"Definitely." I leap to my feet. "Let's get out of here!"

* * *

I'm surprised at how late it's gotten. By the time we eat and get back to my apartment, it's nearly midnight again.

"I guess you were right," Allie is saying as we turn the lights on. "I really did have 'fuckbugs.'"

"Lesson learned." I smile, yawning. "Always listen to Emily!"

We toss some pillows and a blanket onto my couch. It's too late for anything fancy. My apartment is modest, with bare walls and no TV - I haven't finished moving in yet - but my couch is big and comfortable. Allie sits down and touches her midsection.

"I'm feeling better," she tells me. "I don't think I've got any more stuff inside me."

"Good." I'm washing my face in the bathroom. "Let's call an exterminator in the morning."

"Good idea."

I'm exhausted, and I've got work tomorrow. I brush my teeth quickly, say goodnight to Allie, and strip my clothes off in the bedroom. Within minutes, I'm beneath my covers in the darkness.

I close my eyes and sigh. The end of a stressful day.

I do some deep breathing and let my thoughts drift. I imagine the torrents of white cream pouring out from between Allie's legs. The clutch of eggs inside her uterus. I think about the sounds she made - those orgasmic moans - as her body pushed it all out.

I touch myself idly beneath the sheets. I'm too sleepy to really masturbate.

As I fall asleep, my thoughts transition into dreams. I'm floating in an ocean of sex and fertility: nothing but milk and semen and vaginal fluids, translucent and white. My body aches with primal need. I'm aroused and ovulating, like a flower in bloom. My body lies vulnerable and heavy with sleep, waiting to be bred.

Suddenly, I feel pressure against my crotch. Something is trying to penetrate me.

I dream about my ex-boyfriend on top of me. His elbows are pinning my shoulders down, and I feel his unprotected cock poking at me.

"Emily, you've got a biological clock," he's telling me. "No more waiting. Just let it happen."

At that memory, my heart begins to race.

In real life, I let my boyfriend dump his seed inside me. I'd spend the rest of the month in a quiet panic, feeling like a prisoner in my own body. I hated being a woman, I dreaded my future... and I suppose you can guess the rest.

Now, in my dream, I have another chance to say no. I scream it out loud, right in my boyfriend's face.

"No!"

I kick him away, trying to hurt him. I press my thighs together and thrash around the bed.

"No!" I keep shouting. "No! No! No! No! No!"

SLAP!

I'm jolted awake with a sharp pain on my thigh. Suddenly I'm in my own bed, nearly naked, without a blanket.

"Got it!" Allie exclaims.

"What?" I sit up, rubbing my thigh. Allie is kneeling across my legs. She's wearing a t-shirt and mesh shorts, and her hair is messy. She looks like she just woke up.

"There was a bug on your leg," she explains. "Sorry to wake you, but I had to kill it."

"A fuckbug?" I fall back on the bed. "Shit."

"Yeah." She flicks the dead bug aside, shrugging, and I hear its body hit the far wall. "At least I stopped it."

"Right... Thank you for that."

My bedroom lights are on. Remembering that I'm topless, I grudgingly pull a bedsheet over myself. Allie and I have seen each other naked before, so I'm not too embarrassed.

She crawls into the bed next to me. "You sounded like you were having a nightmare." she says. "That's why I came in. Are you okay?"

I nod, swallowing. The panic from my dream is fading, but I still feel the adrenaline in my veins.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asks.

"Not really, but thank you." I take a deep breath and try to calm down. "Sorry to scare you."

Allie leans in and hugs my shoulders. "It's been a weird day, huh?"

"Yeah." I sigh. "Guess I'd better call an exterminator for myself, too."

We lay together quietly, still hugging, and share a pillow. It feels good to relax. I'm enjoying the sensation of my bare skin against her arms.

Through Allie's shirt, I can feel her enlarged nipples. "How do your boobs feel?" I ask quietly.

She shrugs. "They still feel different, but it's not painful or anything."

I nod. We lay silently together, facing each other, with our eyes closed.

"This does feel nice," I say at last. My mouth nearly touches her ear, so I'm whispering. "Nobody ever hugs me like this."

"Yeah," Allie whispers back. "I haven't felt this in a while." She laughs softly. "You know, it's too bad the bugs gave you nightmares. They always gave me sex dreams!"

My heart skips a beat. "Sex dreams about who?" I ask innocently.

"Just Dave. I know it's been a long time, but..." She sighs breathily, almost into my ear. "In my dream, he's back on top of me. Inside me..."

I can hear her voice quivering. "That sounds nice," I say.

"Yeah..." I can feel the tension growing in her body. "I've been thinking about sex, like... non-stop."

Her hand rests on my bare shoulder, and it's warm and soft. My exposed breasts are pressed against her t-shirt. I smell her hair and the faint scent of soap on her skin.

Allie is straight - as far as I know - and I've never felt any sexual tension with her. But suddenly...

"Emily," she whispers. Her hand begins to slide down my back. "You can say no, okay?"

"Okay." I'm staring at my bedroom wall, her nose against my cheek, as I feel her hand drift across the curve of my back.

We're both breathing hard, and I can feel the heat on Allie's face.

I'm wearing only underwear. Allie's fingers slip beneath the waistband, and I feel them sliding across my ass. My hand tightens on her hip.

"Is this okay?" she asks.

"Yeah."

Her hand creeps around to the front - slowly - and I adjust my legs. Soon, I'm feeling Allie in my pubic hair.

Her index finger slips between my labia, and I gasp. It's just one finger, but the intensity makes my legs quiver. She slides it across me, feeling how wet I've gotten.

I'm still staring at the wall, blinking, with the bedroom lights on. Allie is breathing into my ear.

All of a sudden, her finger is probing my vaginal entrance. I realize she's about to penetrate me.

"No - wait," I say.

Allie freezes. Her whole body tenses up. "Stop?" she asks.

"We shouldn't. Not tonight, at least."

"Yeah..." Allie takes a deep breath, and her hand withdraws from my underwear. "I'm sorry," she says, "It's the sex dreams, and... hormones, maybe..."

There's embarrassment in her voice. I squeeze her tight, still wrapped up in our hug.

"It's fine," I reassure her. "It's been a weird day."

"Yeah." She nods into my shoulder. "Thanks for being here."

We lay hugging in silence for a few more minutes. Then Allie, wordlessly, rolls over and switches the light off.

For the rest of the night, I don't think about fuckbugs. Instead, I fall asleep in my friend's arms... and I dream about nothing in particular.

* * *

"You're looking cheerful," Lisa tells me the next day.

We're sitting across from each other, eating salads in the office kitchen. Today I'm wearing a bright green blouse, with freshly-ironed slacks.

"Thanks," I say with my mouth full. "Actually, I hardly slept at all. But I feel pretty good!"

"Hmph." Moving slowly, Lisa pushes her salad around with a fork.

She looks awful today, to be honest. Her makeup is too heavy, but I can still see dark circles under her eyes. Her clothes are baggy, and loose strands of hair dangle across her face.

I've told her everything - almost everything - about Allie's fuckbug infestation. She simply nodded and said, "I had that at first, too."

"Is everything okay?" I ask now.

"I don't know." Lisa looks down. "I just need a break. My husband and I have been arguing about everything." She frowns into her salad. "Between that and... the bug situation... I'm not feeling great."

"I'm sorry to hear that." I bite my lip, deciding not to pry further. "Well, you're welcome to come visit my place anytime. We're practically neighbors, after all."

She glances up at me, and I catch a sudden eagerness in her expression.

"I'd really appreciate that," she says quickly.

"Sure, any time you -"

"Tonight?" she asks. "I know you were supposed to come over for dinner, but..."

We lock eyes for a moment. I sense there's something important that Lisa wants to tell me.

"Yeah." I nod agreement. "Come over my place tonight."