Fullness Of Life Ch. 01

Cassidy Meadows looked across the booth at the man seated on the opposite side. Although she had dated him for five years, at that moment, Cassidy thought that Brad Frazier looked like a complete stranger. And, in a way, Cassidy had to admit, at that moment, perhaps he was.

It had taken all of Cassidy's courage to work up the nerve to confront Brad. Although they had dated for so long that people often thought that they had always been together, Brad had yet to ask Cassidy to marry him. As a matter of fact, for the duration of their dating years, Brad had yet to ask Cassidy to do anything. It had taken him over a year to work up to their first kiss, and in the subsequent four years, there hadn't been any further progress in their physical relationship.

At first, Cassidy had told herself that Brad just was shy. But after having spent countless hours with the man, watching him fish, play pool, kick back at the lake and shoot the breeze with his buddies, Cassidy just couldn't convince herself of Brad's shyness anymore.

And tonight, she had decided to take action. When Brad had asked her to meet him at the diner for supper, she had agreed, although doing so bothered her. It had been forever since Brad had stopped picking her up at her house and making an effort to appear to be "dating" her. Now, he just assumed that she would show up when he asked. Tonight she had agreed, but it was because she had an agenda for the evening.

"Well," Cassidy repeated, "Are you going to tell me where this relationship is going, Brad?"

Cassidy watched as Brad's face flushed red in his anger and embarrassment. "Now, Dee, this isn't the time or the place . . . "

"Brad, I'm tired of looking for the right time and place. Just lay it on the line for me. Do you have any intentions of us getting married?"

If she had suspected Brad's reaction, Cassidy would have ducked. As it was, the sweet tea that suddenly spewed out of Brad's mouth, across the table and into her face, came as a complete shock to Cassidy. Stunned as she was, it was the laughter that hurt the most, though.

Brad didn't seem to be amused about having just sprayed her down with his dinner drink, he seemed to be roaring with laughter about her question. As Cassidy picked up her napkin and began mopping the tea off of her face, she looked at Brad in confusion. If the tea incident wasn't enough to draw everyone in the diner's attention to their table, the volume of Brad's next question would have done it.

"Where the hell did you get the idea that I would want to marry YOU?" Brad bellowed.

It was at that moment that Cassidy suddenly realized the man's callousness. She sat in stunned silence as he continued.

"Hell, Dee, I was doin' you a favor, taking you out all these years. What the Sam Hill do you want to go and mess it all up by getting all serious and crap?"

Cassidy felt the blood rush to her face. Doing her a favor? Trying to remain calm, Cassidy said, "Brad, what do you mean, you were doing me a favor?"

Brad didn't seem to care that everyone in the diner had stopped eating and was turned in their seats, watching the unfolding drama. He loudly continued his explanation, "Well, Dee, it ain't like there's anybody else been wanting you. You ain't exactly the kind of girl that guys are chomping at the bit to date. Don't act so all fired high and mighty. You're just lucky I took pity on you and been taking you around. At least you weren't sitting at home, wasting away. Course," Brad stopped talking for a moment to scratch out his ear canal before he gave her plump body a meaningful glance then continued, "With a body like yours you could stand to stay home a few nights and do a little wasting away."

If Cassidy could have melted into the woodwork, she would have done so at that moment. Cassidy had always known that she weighed more than Brad thought she ought to. But, in the big picture of their relationship, she hadn't let that bother her too much. It had been more important to her to take care of Brad's needs and wants. And there had been plenty of them to focus on without leaving a lot of time to worry about her weight. When he had brought up the subject before, Cassidy had just shrugged it off, figuring she would deal with it later.

But now Brad had made his opinion public. He had not only embarrassed her, she was humiliated. And he had done it on purpose to put her back in her place because she had made him uncomfortable.

Cassidy had always struggled to handle situations in her life with integrity and poise. Cassidy knew that this was a defining moment for her and she had to handle this in a way that she could live with. With a heavy heart, Cassidy realized that there was nothing she could say to salvage her relationship with Brad at this point. It was best to leave quietly, while she still had some dignity remaining.

Standing up, Cassidy calmly reached down and picked up her purse. She first turned to face Brad, then, shaking her head, pivoted on her heel and started to walk away.

But suddenly, something snapped inside of Cassidy. She had lived her whole life in the shadows because of her desire to never be inappropriate. But in the blink of an eye, her whole life had come down to this - a man who thought that he could belittle and insult her and still have her give him a lift home afterward. The fire of humiliation shot to her very core. And from her core, she felt a response. Like a lightening bolt through her body, she realized that her life as she had known it was over. Nothing inside of her would ever be the same again. And it was time to let a few people know that - starting with Brad Frazier.

Returning to stand in front of Brad, Cassidy leaned down to look him in the eye. Using a tone that sounded genuinely sympathetic, she said in a quiet voice that grew louder as she continued, "Brad, after you told me about your little "problem", I have been trying to lose weight. I realize that having a penis so short that you are afraid you won't be able to penetrate me because of the extra inch of flesh that I have can be somewhat embarrassing. But, honey, after you finally showed it to me last night, I realize that it would only be by an act of God that I could ever get skinny enough to get close enough for you to stick that tiny, little nubby thing in me. I hope your next girlfriend is small enough to squeeze really close, so she can at least hump the damn thing."

And with that, Cassidy took her own glass of sweet tea and poured it over Brad's shocked face.

Cassidy quickly walked out of the diner and to her car. Everyone inside the eating establishment was roaring with laughter, and she wanted to make a rapid get away before anyone noticed her absence. Popping the trunk on her car, Cassidy hurriedly emptied it of all Brad's sporting equipment - his prized fishing rod, his custom made pool cue and his box of hand tied lures. There were also some coolers full of God only knew what and at least one dried up box of bait.

Brad had always stored his fishing gear in Cassidy's car, claiming that it was safer there than in his truck. As the smell of rotting fish guts hit Cassidy's nostrils, she realized yet another truth about the man. He was a compulsive liar!

Cassidy put the equipment on the ground behind her car and jumped into the driver's seat. She figured that Brad would see his stuff on his way out to his own truck, which was parked nearby, and pick it up. Cassidy's car was pointed out of the parking lot and Cassidy wanted to get away from there as soon as possible. Taking the time to carry Brad's stuff over to his truck would take up precious moments.

But fate has a way of changing even the most well made plans, and Cassidy's plans weren't that well made. Just as she cranked the car, Brad burst out of the restaurant and yelled across the parking lot, "Well, Cindy Ann sure as hell thinks what I've got is enough to satisfy any woman - and she would know a hell of a lot better than you, bitch!"

Shock washed over Cassidy. Brad was sleeping with Cindy Ann? Cindy Ann Chambers? Her best friend? Well, duh! Of course they were sleeping together - how could she have missed the signs. They had been making eyes at each other for months.

With her mind spinning with this new information, Cassidy was not really paying a lot of attention to her actions. She automatically put the car into reverse to back out of her parking spot and to get away from Brad. As soon as she heard the loud crack of wood and the crunch of plastic, she realized that she had just backed over Brad's most beloved possessions. At first, she felt a wave of remorse, then she was overwhelmed by self righteous anger. Brad had taken five years of her life - always holding her in limbo, waiting to see if he would offer her what she most wanted.

Cassidy decided then and there that she would damn well take a few things from him. She threw the car into forward, inched up a few feet, then slammed it back into reverse. Brad was looking at her like she had lost her mind, because he had no idea what she was running over. Cassidy repeated her actions twice more, then sped toward the exit. As she left her parking spot, Brad caught sight of his equipment, smashed into the asphalt. He started screaming and running - first toward his stuff, then toward Cassidy's car.

The exit was up a slight hill, so Brad was having to put effort into catching up with Cassidy, but he was fueled by his anger and he looked determined to tear her from limb to limb. But Cassidy was just as angry. Looking around the inside of her car, Cassidy spied Brad's bowling bag. She paused at the exit of the parking lot, and waited for Brad to get closer to her car. Working quickly, Cassidy maneuvered the bag and rolled down her window. When Brad got about 25 feet away, she threw his bowling bag at him.

Without thinking, Brad lunged to catch the bag and it fell lightly into his outstretched hands as he hit the concrete. He looked momentarily confused, but then his face turned ashen when he looked up and realized that Cassidy was holding his custom made $250 Storm Bowling Ball in her hands.

Cassidy cocked her eyebrow at Brad and said, "So you don't want me, but you want it, baby? Well, here you go!"

Then she tossed the ball out of her car window.

Brad's scream of "No!" echoed into the growing darkness as the ball rolled down the hill, just out of his reach. Cassidy knew that the rough pavement of the parking lot had just ruined the polished finish of Brad's beloved "Stormy". She laughed out loud as she laid rubber pulling away from the diner's parking lot.

It didn't take long for Cassidy to decide what she was going to do. Even before she had gone to the diner tonight, she had already decided that she was going to make a change in her life. She had just been waiting around to figure out what Brad was planning on doing. And now she knew. He was planning on using her to ease his boredom and using her best friend to ease his sexual needs. Well, enough of that!

Life had just slammed a door shut in Cassidy's face and she was about to throw open the nearest window and climb through.

Cassidy rushed in her front door and headed to her bedroom. She grabbed her suitcases and began packing. Cassidy had always wanted to get out of Sweetwater. She had just always assumed that she would be accompanied by her husband when she left. But now, she was on her own, and she wanted to go. But go where? Cassidy ran through several options in her mind.

Then Cassidy remembered. As a child, she had sat on the floor of her living room and watched one tv show over and over. It was the Grand Ol' Opry. For years, Cassidy had longed to visit there. Nashville. The city of opportunity. Music City, USA. Once she thought of Nashville, it only took a moment for Cassidy to make up her mind. She was going to the land of rhinestone cowboys and fulfilled dreams. She had a few of her own dreams she would like to see fulfilled - and Nashville was where she would start.

There wasn't too much that Cassidy owned, since she had been renting the house and it had come fully furnished. Just like her life, there wasn't much to show for who she was. Cassidy had always kept her intrusion into the world at a bare minimum and accepted that life was supposed to be like that for her. It was with a real sadness that Cassidy looked down at the few things that marked her existence.

As Cassidy was throwing the last of her personal items into her bag, her phone rang. Absentmindedly, she picked up the receiver, then cursed herself silently. Why hadn't she thought about what she was doing - the new Cassidy had the option to ignore a ringing phone. But it was too late now. Cassidy had already said, "Hello."

The voice on the other end of the line didn't bother with introductions. It just went into immediate wails of distress.

"Oh, it's you, Aunt Margie," Cassidy said wearily. Cassidy's Aunt Margie was the town busybody. She truly believed that every thing that went on in the town was her business. And Cassidy's life was under her constant scrutiny. Needless to say, Aunt Margie wasn't very happy with Cassidy's continuing life as a single woman.

Through the great gasps of her aunt's sobs, Cassidy heard Aunt Margie say, "Oh, my dear! What have you done? Poor Bradley is beside himself. What has gotten into you? How are you ever going to get a man with such an obstinate and bitter attitude?"

Cassidy rolled her eyes. She knew that there was no point in explaining to her Aunt that Brad had really dumped her. Cassidy also knew that by now the story had circulated through all of her tiny hometown and that no one would really want to hear her side. Even the eye witnesses would begin to see the whole encounter with Brad as the victim. After all he was the local good ol' boy. Everyone loved Brad.

Even Cindy Ann. Cassidy's best friend. Uggghhhh!

After about five minutes of loudly bemoaning her unfortunate relation to such an uncouth, ungrateful child as Cassidy, Aunt Margie went up for a breath. Cassidy took that moment to break into the conversation.

"You are absolutely right, Aunt Margie! I have behaved badly. And, there is no way that I can bear to show my face in town again." Barely suppressing her smile, Cassidy continued, "I can't believe what I have done. I have no choice but to leave Sweetwater and let poor Brad . . . " Let poor Brad what? Win another round? Revel in the sympathy of the women in town? Drink himself into a stupor, then do a mating dance with some bar hopping hussy? Poor hussy.

"Let poor Brad get over me and my bad attitude." It was the best Cassidy could come up with on short notice!

But it seemed to make Aunt Margie somewhat happier. The older woman said, "Well, Cassidy, I do think that might be for the best. If you just take off and get out of town for a few days, maybe poor Bradley will be willing to take you back. If you offer him your heartfelt apology, I'll do my best to intercede and maybe this won't be a total disaster."

Cassidy stuck her tongue out at her aunt, but answered in a soothing tone, "No, Aunt Margie. You're wrong. What I've done this time is far worse than some small offense that Brad might find it in his heart to forgive. No, this is far, far worse. I think I'll have to go away longer than a few days."

Aunt Margie sniffed in her pathetic attempt to continue pulling Cassidy's heartstrings. "Well, my dear, I do have a cousin over in Gallivant's Ferry. Maybe she could put you up for a few weeks."

"Aunt Margie, I could never ask you to put yourself out like that." Cassidy's barely contained sarcasm was beginning to wear on her own nerves. Determined to bring the conversation to a quick end, she said, "No, I will just go off on my own and find my way. Keep me in your prayers, Aunt Margie." And with that honest request, Cassidy hung up the phone.

One quick look around her house convinced her that she was taking all that belonged to her. Since she rented the house from the church, she left the rent check for the next month on the kitchen table along with the key. A brief note explained that she wouldn't be coming back and thanked the church committee for allowing her to rent the house for the last few years. How could a person live somewhere for so long and have nothing more than two suitcases of personal stuff? Shaking her head, Cassidy flipped off the lights and headed out into the darkness.

After looking at a map, Cassidy knew that once she got to the highway she would be about nine hours from Nashville. With a little huff of disgust, Cassidy noticed how much closer it would be if she was from Sweetwater, Tennessee, rather than Sweetwater, South Carolina.

It was almost 8:00 by now and Cassidy was ready to put the town lights behind her. As she cruised down the last road to get to the turn off for the interstate, she saw the blue lights start up in her rear view mirror. Shaking her head in frustration, Cassidy wondered if she was never going to be able to get out of town

Cassidy pulled her car off the road and waited until the officer approached her car door. With the beam of a police issued flashlight blinding her, Cassidy wasn't sure exactly who had pulled her over. As the light motioned for her to roll down her window, Cassidy complied. There weren't a lot of people from Sweetwater that Cassidy wanted to talk to right now, but she wasn't about to ignore an officer of the law.

"Cassidy Meadows, just where the hell do you think you are going?" Cassidy smiled at the rough voice. It was Ray Strong, a friend of her father's from their years together back in the army.

Cassidy's family had always been close to Ray. When Cassidy's own parents had died in a car wreck seven years ago, leaving Cassidy with no family, it was Ray who came through to remind Cassidy that she wasn't alone in the world. Cassidy knew that she could trust Ray with her life, as well as with her heart.

But even knowing that, Cassidy hoped Ray didn't know what she had done to Brad. She didn't want him to be disappointed in her. "Ray, I'm leaving town for awhile."

"Now, Cassidy, I heard tell that Bradley Frazier was looking to press charges against you for destruction of property. Would you like to tell me what happened?"

Cassidy narrowed her eyes at Ray. "Do you really want to know?"

"Naw, I done heard what you did!" Ray said, laughing out loud. Then he continued, "I just wanted to tell you that he was all puffed up and lookin' to pick a fight. I think you are doing the right thing by heading out. When will you be back?"

Lowering her eyes, Cassidy said, "Ray, I'm not coming back. I just can't be who I need to be here. And if I stay, I'll always be the woman that Brad got the best of. I just can't be here anymore."

Looking back up into Ray's face, Cassidy could see his concern. "Girl, I wish you didn't feel that way. The people in this town love you."

"Ray, they love Brad. The only time I've ever been noticed in this town was when Brad took an interest in me. Otherwise, I was just a wallflower. I don't want to go back to that and I don't want to go forward here, knowing that Brad and Cindy Ann have been sneaking around behind my back. Who would have the courage to look me in the eye, even if I did manage to walk around with my head held high?"

Ray sighed loudly. "Tell me where you are going, girl. You know I ain't lying when I say that I'm going to miss you. And you know I'm going to want to keep tabs on you."

Cassidy smiled up into Ray's face. "I'm going to Nashville, Ray. I don't know if I'll stay there, but I'm planning to. Please don't tell anyone for awhile. I need to get my life under my own control."

Nodding his head, Ray said, "Sure thing, Cassidy. You know, I never took too much to Brad calling you "Dee". Why he couldn't get your whole name out, I'll never know!"