Fullness Of Life Ch. 03

When Cassidy pulled her door open to exit her apartment, she found Robin standing on the landing outside, with her hand poised in the air as if to knock. Robin laughed and said, "Now, talk about timing! We were just coming to see if you would go out to supper with us."

Cassidy looked past Robin and saw Van standing on the steps behind her. At the bottom of the steps, near Robin's SUV, stood Jesse, looking nonchalantly down the street. Frowning, Cassidy said, "All of you?"

Robin and Van exchanged a look that Cassidy recognized as one of concern. Mentally kicking herself for appearing rude, she said, "Of course I would love to go with you all. I just hadn't planned on it and you took me by surprise."

Before Cassidy had a chance to step out of her door, though, Robin took her by the arm and pushed her back into her apartment. Turning toward Van, Robin said, "Sweetheart, I need to use Cassidy's bathroom. We won't be a minute. We'll meet you at the car."

Robin pushed in behind Cassidy and closed the door of Van's childhood home in his surprised face. Stunned, Cassidy faced Robin. "What are you doing?" Cassidy asked.

Rolling her eyes, Robin said, "Cassidy, you have got to help me. Van is used to Jesse being around all the time, but I'm not! He is driving me crazy. He isn't intrusive or anything, but he's always around. I'm going nuts! Please go out to dinner with us and keep Jesse busy. He never talks or laughs and I want to pay attention to Van - not worry about some Neanderthal caveman without social skills!"

Cassidy couldn't help herself. She burst out laughing! "Oh, Robin! You are too much. You don't have to beg. I'll be glad to go. In fact, I would love to - I was just going to eat supper by myself."

With a hesitant grimace, Robin said, "Cassidy, I don't just mean tonight. Can you spend some time with us over the next few weeks? I'm afraid I'll never get to know Van if I don't have some way to keep Jesse occupied. I know it is a lot to ask. You don't even know the man, and I realize he isn't a dream come true for communication skills. But I don't know what else to do."

Patting Robin's arm, Cassidy said, "Robin, Jesse and I know each other fairly well. Someday, when we have time, I'll tell you all about the day the security company showed up. But for now, it's enough to know that I don't mind spending some time with Jesse. If he doesn't mind having me around, I don't mind hanging out with ya'll." Cassidy almost laughed out loud at the irony of that sentence. Truth was, Jesse Turner consumed almost all of her waking thoughts. The thought of having to spend lots of time with him was very appealing!

Dinner that night was meant to be a rather quiet, romantic affair. Van and Jesse took Robin and Cassidy to one of the most expensive restaurants in town. The atmosphere was elegant and refined. Rather than seating them in the main dining room, though, the maitre d' showed them to a special table that was well removed from the crowd. In fact, it was down right secluded. The man explained that he placed them there for Van's sake, so they could enjoy their meal in private, but Cassidy didn't believe him.

Cassidy had noticed that as soon as their party entered the restaurant, the man had frowned at her. He had given Cassidy's clothes a smirk of distaste. Although Cassidy had managed to ignore his actions while he was seating them, as soon as he exited the room, Cassidy stuck her tongue out at him. Robin had seen the whole exchange and burst into giggles. Then it only got worse. Rather than calming down, anything that either one of them said tended to set off a new round of laughter. It wasn't long before both Van and Jesse gave up and joined in. The ice had been broken. Soon, the four of them were swapping stories and sharing jokes like they had been friends forever.

Far too quickly, the evening came to an end. They reluctantly climbed into Robin's SUV and headed back to Cassidy's apartment. Much to Cassidy's surprise, Robin and Van waited in the car while Jesse walked Cassidy up to her door. He had offered to do so in order to make sure everything was safe, but Cassidy was secretly hoping he was following her up the steps so he could give her a good night kiss.

Cassidy's hopes were dashed when they reached the upstairs landing, though. Rather than kiss her, Jesse assumed a distant air and said, "I know that Robin has asked you to join us for the next few weeks. I'm afraid that my presence can be somewhat intimidating. However, I will not stop doing my job just because I am making her uncomfortable. You are welcome to accompany us on our outings, but, Cassidy, don't attempt to distract me from my job."

Cassidy was stunned. She had thought that during dinner they had actually begun getting to know one another. But the man who was standing beside her outside the door to her apartment wasn't someone she recognized. Taking a deep breath, Cassidy said, "Jesse, I'm going to be around, but it is just for Robin's sake. Don't let it go to your head!"

And with that, Cassidy unlocked her door. After stepping into her apartment, she very firmly closed it behind her, shutting it in Jesse's face. So much for hoping that Jesse would ever return her feelings of attraction. And, damn it all, she had gotten her hopes up again during supper.

Sunday passed by rather quickly for Cassidy. Even though she had promised Robin she would be available for her, she explained that she really needed to buy a computer. Since she was starting work on Monday, Sunday was really her last opportunity. So after going to church with Van, Robin, Eleanor, Horace and Jesse, Cassidy slipped away and went shopping. After she found what she wanted, the rest of her day was spent attaching and setting up her new equipment. Although Jesse was never far from her thoughts, Cassidy forced herself to keep focusing on where she was going and who she was becoming.

On Monday, Cassidy's life fell into what was to become her regular weekday routine. Eleanor had her working the breakfast and lunch shifts at the diner, then working on the books when things slowed down in the afternoon. When she finished up at 4:00, Cassidy had about an hour before Robin swung by and picked her up for their evening dinner outings with Jesse and Van. Cassidy insisted that they have her home by 9:00 each night so she could get up in time to get to work the next morning. Since Van didn't want his mama mad at him for making her newest employee tired, he saw to it that they wrapped up each evening in time for Cassidy's "curfew".

By the end of the first week, Cassidy had a much clearer understanding of just who Jesse Turner was. Not only had she absorbed every word that came from his mouth, after Cassidy had figured out that Eleanor was Van's mother, she had plied the woman shamelessly for any information she might have about Jesse. And Eleanor seemed to have a lot.

Cassidy learned that Jesse had worked for Van for almost six years. The two were fast friends in addition to employer and employee. Jesse had moved to Nashville specifically to work for Van. The two had met years earlier at summer camp. Jesse had been Van's camp counselor for two years when Van was a teenager. When Van realized that he needed some help with his career, he had gone looking for Jesse.

Eleanor explained that when Van finally located him, Jesse wasn't still some young, carefree college kid. He had gone on to earn his PhD in Criminal Justice and was teaching at UNC-A.

But that wasn't all that had changed. Jesse was also in the final stages of a painful divorce. Apparently his chosen wife was highly offended when, after seven years of marriage, Jesse suggested that they start a family. She had informed Jesse that he could adopt some rugrats if he wanted them, but that she wasn't sacrificing her figure for some slobbery, obnoxious kid. Fortunately Jesse seemed to realize that this wasn't the kind of person he wanted to have kids with, adopted or otherwise. He packed his bags and moved out.

That was when Van found him. Wanting to start over somewhere new, Jesse accepted Van's offer of a job. Although it was nothing like teaching, Jesse had become far more than just Van's bodyguard. He was basically Van's right hand. As Van grew more popular, Jesse's duties began including everything from the bodyguard position that he had originally accepted, to booking and keeping track of Van's concerts. Over the years, Jesse had basically become Van's manager. Eleanor and Horace were both very glad that Van had Jesse as a friend as well as an employee.

Cassidy realized that she was way beyond simply curious about Jesse. Although he continued to keep his physical distance from her, with each passing day, Cassidy was more sure that she was falling in love with the man. When he told tales about growing up in the mountains, Cassidy could feel her heart ache, just from wanting to have been there with him. And when he talked about his future and how much he wanted to buy some land and build his dream house, Cassidy thought her heart would burst from the desire to be a part of that future. But from where Cassidy sat, across the table from the man each and every night, she wasn't sure if he even cared that she was alive.

Although the week days became somewhat routine for Cassidy, the week-ends were spent going to exciting and new places with her three companions. Van apparently spent his days in the studio and he loved getting out and seeing people whenever he could. The man was a genuine extrovert who needed to be around others. Fortunately, Robin was equally comfortable with crowds. So the week-ends found the four of them frequenting bars, going to concerts and visiting with the rollers and shakers in Nashville.

In every situation, Jesse introduced Cassidy as his friend, making it obvious that she was with him. But he never touched her. Cassidy, unlike Van and Robin, was an introvert. By the time the week-end was over, the combination of the frustration that built inside of her every time she was with Jesse and the overwhelming pressure of constantly being in crowded situations, caused Cassidy to want to crawl back into her apartment and hide forever.

It was during the third week-end that the four of them spent together, that Cassidy was surprised when Jesse intervened on her behalf. They had just left a party at the governor's mansion and were headed to a country western bar on the other side of town. Van loved to drop into places unexpectedly and perform for the crowds. Cassidy had no doubt that she was about to be in the middle of yet another cheering throng of fans.

When they were almost to the bar, Jesse, who was sitting in the back seat with Cassidy, said, "Van, you and Robin go on in. I've arranged for William to watch out over you tonight. I'm going to take Cassidy home. I think we have just about used up every bit of social energy that she has."

Cassidy's eyes flew to Jesse's face. She was floored that he had picked up on her discomfort. But she was even more impressed that he was going to leave Van alone on a Saturday night. Jesse had been training several people to help him out as Van got more popular and William seemed to be his star pupil. But to leave Van with William was a huge step for someone as dedicated as Jesse.

Van obviously was having similar thoughts because he was turned in the front seat, looking back at Jesse in bewilderment. "You are going to let me go to a bar without you?" Van asked incredulously.

Jesse shook his head and chuckled. "Man, I must really have been overdoing it if you are all this shocked by my decision. I didn't realize I was being so obsessive."

When no one jumped to contradict him, Jesse burst into laughter. Van and Cassidy stared at him momentarily then began laughing as well. Even Robin looked up in the rear view mirror and shook her head in amusement.

It was Van who spoke next saying, "Jesse, maybe you should take a little time off. You know, a couple of days. I'm sure William and the others could cover." Nodding his head toward Cassidy, Van added, "And mama wants Cassidy to take a few days off as well. She says that she's been working too hard."

Fire rushed into Cassidy's cheeks at Van's obvious matchmaking. She quickly spoke up, "Van, watch it. You are treading on dangerous ground here. Jesse's a big boy - he can invite his own companions without your help."

At that very moment, Robin pulled into the valet parking for the bar they were going to. "Look, you guys work that out later. Why don't you take the SUV back to Van's for me, Jesse? We'll catch a cab. That way I don't have to worry about driving so late at night."

Within seconds, Jesse and Cassidy had moved to the front seat of the vehicle and Robin and Van were headed into the loud and crowded bar. With a wave of his hand, Van dismissed Jesse and Cassidy and turned toward his fans.

Jesse pulled out of the parking area and pointed the SUV in the direction of Van's house. Watching him, Cassidy said, "Thank you, Jesse. I hadn't realized that I was so obvious about being tired of the crowds."

Shaking his head, Jesse said, "I'm sure that no one else noticed. But I've made it a point to pay close attention to you over the last few weeks. You haven't had much alone time since Robin and Van got engaged. If I didn't need to back off for any other reason, it would have been enough to back off just so you could get some rest, since Robin won't let me tag along without dragging you out with us."

Laughing, Cassidy said, "Jesse, I'm sure that I don't have to go out with you three all of the time now. But I've not had a chance to meet too many other people - at least not people I wanted to hang out with. I have enjoyed being with you all and I'm glad Robin asked me to be a part of the group."

Cassidy saw Jesse shoot her a look, but in the dark, she couldn't decipher what it meant. Since Jesse didn't say anything, Cassidy continued, "I do get tired though. And I appreciate you making a way for me to get out of going to yet another crowded bar."

Jesse chuckled quietly, then they both fell into a comfortable silence until they reached Van's house. Jesse came around the SUV and opened Cassidy's door. When they had first started going out, Cassidy had opened her own door. It hadn't taken too many angry looks from Jesse until Cassidy realized that he wanted to open her door. Now she made it a point to wait for him to open it for her. It felt good to be catered to, especially by the man she was in love with.

Holding out his hand, Jesse helped Cassidy down from the vehicle. Since she wasn't used Jesse touching her, Cassidy relished the moment. When Jesse didn't let go of her hand after he started walking toward the house, Cassidy was both thrilled and shocked. She raced to keep up with his footsteps, hoping to not accidentally pull her hand from his grip.

At the front door of Van's house, Jesse said, "If you want to wait inside, I'll just grab my stuff and then I'll take you home."

Cassidy frowned at Jesse. "I have my own car here, Jesse. You don't need to take me home."

Jesse smiled down into her face as he unlocked the door and waited for her to step into the house. "I think if we are planning on taking our vacations together, I better get the scoop from Ms. Eleanor about when you are allowed to take your days off." And with that, Jesse turned and walked down the hall.

Cassidy stood in stunned silence. The man was planning on going on a vacation with her? He had taken Van seriously? Didn't she get any say so in the matter? Did she want any say so?!?

When Jesse came back, he was carrying his duffel bag. It was obviously packed as an overnight bag. Still frowning, Cassidy said, "Jesse, am I missing something here?"

Jesse closed the space between them and pulled her into his arms. He said, "I've given you three weeks, Cassidy. I can't wait any longer. If you don't want me to go home with you tonight, you need to spell it out clearly. I want to be with you. Can you find it in your heart to be with me?"

Cassidy couldn't have spoken if her life depended on it. Jesse wanted her? Granted she didn't have a lot of experience where men were concerned, but surely she hadn't missed all of the signs. After a few moments, Cassidy managed to say, "You want to go home with me? Why?"

Jesse's low, deep chuckle reverberated between their bodies. "Oh, Cassidy! I want to go home with you for the same reason I've wanted to spend every night with you since we met. I want to make love to you. I want to kiss you. I want to wake up in your arms."

If Cassidy hadn't been so stupefied, she was fairly certain she would have passed out at that moment. In her wildest dreams, Jesse Turner didn't say beautiful things like that. He just grunted and ugghhed. Yet here he was, saying these things - and saying them to her.

Obviously the look on her face was amusing to Jesse. He smiled at her and said, "Cassidy? Did I read this wrong? Am I completely off base? I was hoping that you would be alright with this."

Finally, reality hit Cassidy. Shaking her head to clear it, she said firmly, "Jesse, there are some things that you need to know up front. I don't sleep around. I've never had sex. Until I ended up in yours, I had never even been in a man's bedroom. I know that you already know that, but I need to say it again. I'm not a woman who can handle being friends after we have sex. I don't want to mess up our friendship. I want you in my life a lot more than I want sex. And I want sex with you really badly!"

Dropping a soft kiss on her lips, Jesse said, "Cassidy, I don't want to have sex with you."

Cassidy's eyes widened in shock. Had she just made a complete fool out of herself?

Jesse continued, "I want to make love to you. All night long. I don't want to mess up our friendship either, but I can't keep this up. I want to be with you more than anything else right now."

After staring intently into Jesse's eyes, Cassidy made her decision. Without another word, Cassidy turned, and taking Jesse's hand, led the way out to her car. Jesse smiled and took the keys she offered him.

Cassidy would never remember the drive to her apartment or walking up the stairs to her door. What Cassidy would always remember was the look in Jesse's eyes as he pulled her into his arms after shutting the door. She would always remember how it felt for his lips to caress hers and to move lovingly down her neck. And she would always remember the reverence he offered her as he removed each piece of her clothing.

When Cassidy was completely naked, she slowly removed all of Jesse's clothes. Cassidy remembered the first night she had seen Jesse across the restaurant. His body had appealed to her then, but now, as it rippled and quivered beneath her fingers, she knew that she would never touch another man willingly. Jesse was the love of her life and knowing that fueled her eagerness to please him.

But Jesse was equally determined to please Cassidy. And he was far more experienced in these matters. With each touch of his hand, Cassidy found it more and more difficult to keep a coherent train of thought. When Jesse laid her down on her bed and crawled over her, she knew she had found where she wanted to spend her life. Jesse's body fit into hers with such ease that she wished she could stay in his arms forever.

As Jesse began maneuvering his body between Cassidy's legs though, another desire began to flood through Cassidy. She had never felt such a strong need - a need to mate with her lover, her beloved, the very breath of her life.

Jesse's fingers explored uncharted territory slowly and smoothly. There was no moment when Cassidy suddenly became aware that Jesse had penetrated her with his gentle fingers. Instead, she gradually noticed that he was stroking her and that each movement of his hand was driving her crazy. Without warning, Cassidy suddenly climaxed as she had never before, milking Jesse's fingers with each contraction.