Futanari Birthday Ch. 02

"Hey, Jess! Do you want to go to the pool today?" Lisa's voice woke Jess from a mid-afternoon summer's nap.

"Mrrnnno. Later. Go away." She rolled over and pulled the pillow over her head. Her friend bounced into the room, tossing her keys carelessly into the bowl. James coughed angrily and, waving ashes out of his face, stalked out to go smoke in the privacy of his bedroom. "Gimme my keys back, you whiney stoner bitch!" Her keys sailed through the door as it slammed shut.

"C'mon! Go to the pool with me! We haven't gone all summer!" Lisa pushed on the sleeping girl's shoulder. "All summerrrrrrrrrrr---"she stretched the last sound as she grabbed Jess and began shaking her, the sound bouncing weirdly in her throat as she rocked, until finally there was a scream. Jess pounced from under the blankets, tackling her and the wrestling match was joined. Screaming and laughing and tickling followed, the two girls rolled around on the couch until finally Jess remembered why she hadn't been to the pool all summer.

"Lisa. Lisa! Get off of me. Stoppit! I can't breathe!" Jess let all the lessons she learned from her little sister out in one burst, getting her friend to roll off her couch and, messy-haired, look at her with concern.

This opened her up for a perfect shot straight to the face from Jess' pillow. Lisa mockingly held the pillow over her face. "Look! Jess, look, I'm Jack Nicholson in One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest!" She lay twitching, her legs straight up in the air, feet bare and jeggings doing incredible things to her whole lower back region. Jess, from her position on the couch, adjusted her bra, her blanket, and the huge erection her friend had given her as they'd wrestled.

"I don't want to go to the pool. You know how I get, all sunburned. I'm white as hell."

"Yeah, because you never go to the pool. I'm taking you to the pool today, if I have to throw you in a sleeper hold, sexily put a bikini on you and drag you there myself."

"Whatever! I don't want to go!" Jess cringed mentally. She'd overloaded that last "whatever" and there was definitely going to be a return-volley of girlfriendy bullshit. Ugh. Yup, here it comes. First the head-cocking, then the hands on the hips. Next it's either going to be pop psychology or gender studies.

"Are you okay? We haven't been to the pool all summer. In fact, I think you've been avoiding me every time I invite you outside. Oh my god! Are you having body-image issues?" Jesus, it was like having an animate TigerBeat Magazine for a best friend.

"I'm not having Tigerbe--- I'm not having body image issues. I just haven't wanted to go to the stupid pool. I've been stupid busy with school work, and I've been working really hard, and when I get home I just want to vege on my couch and watch whatever stupid show will still be relevant when you're hearing this." She was still overcompensating. Jess knew too well that if she acted too upset Lisa would never give up.

She had no idea how to tell her best friend that she had grown a penis after a birthday wish went awry. How does anyone let anybody know that their day-to-day life has turned into the first draft of a failed pitch for a mid-00s Adam Sandler vehicle? It was stupid and impossible and she kept hoping that she would just wake up, or see a shooting star, or at very least her boobs would fall off and she'd grow a beard. But no, her boobs were still awesome and she still actually liked having them, for some reason.

The worst part was that she was still straight. Inside her head, she liked dudes. Liked their abs, liked their pecs. She even got a perverse little thrill from their smell. But her magical dick had a mind of its own, apparently, because if she saw so much as a lady's exposed collarbone she was hard for hours. It was really hard to change in a public pool when you had to hide in the stall consumed with lust for half an hour, and women are experts at identifying the sound of furtive masturbation.

She sighed, and put on her casual-est face. "I just think we should go to a movie. Some dumb popcorn flick, alright? I don't feel like the pool."

"Funny, I think you do feel like the pool, because you're so--" Lisa froze mid-sentence, and it took Jess a second to properly appreciate what was going on. Lisa's hand was on Jess' crotch, and she was definitely going to make a dumb joke about being wet. They stared at each other, frozen as both processed exactly what was happening at the same time.

There was a thunderclap as Lisa backed over the sound barrier fleeing to the opposite side of the room, holding her hand as though venom was slowly seeping up her wrist. Jess stood to follow her, valiantly ignoring the sensation the blanket made as it gathered just below her waist, making everything much more obvious, and much more deeply, deeply weird.

Lisa sputtered. She pointed. She gesticulated frantically. For a minute she appeared to be popping and locking. Finally, Jess dropped the blanket and covered the other girl's mouth with her hand. That other girl's hot breath on her palm nearly sent her brain into overdrive, but she mastered the impulse and slowly met her frantic gaze.

"Lisa. Relax. It's just a dick." Hopefully a cool understatement about how normal everything was would calm her down. Dicks were familiar. Lisa could handle dicks. Magic transsexuals were less familiar, but that freshman year gender-studies mentality would hopefully overwhelm her shock. Slowly, she removed her hand from her friend's face.

"Oh my god. Dude! Next time you have a penis, how about you warn me?"

"What? How am I supposed to know that you're about to make a grab at my genitals? If I wanted that, I'd start drinking out of unattended cups at frat houses. Surprise finger banging for a pun? Who does that?"

Lisa bit her lip as she visibly considered her responses. Jess could almost see wheels turning in her head. She wasn't exactly a closed book. In the context of this metaphor, she wasn't any kind of book. That would make for a really confusing metaphor. No, she was probably something with wheels.

"You're putting me on. What is that, a strapon? Oh my god, is that why you didn't want to go to the pool? You're totally doing some kinky sex play right now, aren't you? Gross!"

"Nope. It's... uh. It's real." Only after she said it did she realize she could have lied. How often does anybody see anybody else's sex parts? Or feel, or even really ponder about? Never. Just lie. Sure, it'll turn your life into a dirty sitcom, but just lie. Lie like a rug. Like Lisa's rug. Did Lisa have a rug? Did she shave her pussy? Suddenly Jess realized that lying would make things really awkward if things were to come out later.

Casting a glance at James' door, she grabbed Lisa by the wrist and lead her through the kitchen, past the freezer with the last slice of cake hidden inside, and into her own bedroom. "Alright, don't freak out, right?" "Jess, what are you doing?"

Jess took a deep breath, hooked her thumbs into her terrycloth gym shorts (a bad choice, in retrospect), and pulled them down. A little sound came out of Lisa's throat as the cloth snagged for a moment on her hardening shaft. It came free and slapped against her stomach with a light slap. Jess stood there for a moment, trying to look demure and feminine with her shorts around her knees. She still had her big girly hips and those full breasts, but the effect was sort of ruined by the fat, decent-sized cock still thickening in the soft breeze. Lisa goggled for a moment, barely breathing.

"I... but... you're a girl!You used to wear jeggings! You couldn't hide... hide that in jeggings! I THINK I SAW YOU PEE ONCE. Oh my god. You're trans. Oh my god oh my god, I'm being such a disrespectful bitch right now, aren't I? Jess, I just want you to know that--"

"I'm not trans. It was... magic? I think? It's totally real, I guess. I'm too scared to go to a doctor with it." Jess, suddenly realizing that she was standing bareassed in front of her window with a stunned girl on her bed, hauled up her shorts.

Lisa stared vacantly for a minute at the bulge in the terrycloth, as though lost in thought. Jess nodded approvingly at the metaphor: her friend's brain was a maze. The other girl's features shifted subtly, and then she was grinning massively, leaning back onto the bed to wiggle out of her own shorts. "Have you tried it out yet?"

"Yes." "Sweet! I've never ridden a virgin diiiiiWHAT WHEN DID YOU WHO DID YOU FUCK?" Lisa's froze, mid-undress, exposing the curve of her butt. Jess tried not to notice, but her dick couldn't help it.

"I should probably tell this story, shouldn't I? The day it happened was my birthday. It was just me and Nick here..." Jess exhaled for probably longer than was necessary and told the entire story of her birthday, the magic cake that might not be magic, and her experience on the kitchen floor.

"What? You grew a magic dick, and YOU ended up giving up the back door, to the guy that's had a dick his whole life? That's probably fucked a bunch of slutty bitches in their slutty assholes? He didn't even let you try it? That's pretty lame. I mean, really hot story. Dirty, and fun and everything, but I can't believe you just gave it up like that."

"Says the girl who was stripping out of her panties the instant she saw a hard cock." "Says the girl who whipped out her hard cock for no reason!" "So you could--- why are we fighting? You didn't even let me finish the story."

Jess composed herself. She'd almost let fly with her next riposte "So you could suck it", but that would have been taking the evening in an even weirder direction. Even if it was true. Even now the image of Lisa with her shorts pulled halfway down was stuck in her brain. She shook her head to clear the suspiciously vagina-shaped cobwebs and continue her story.

"So, as I was saying--" "You said that it was a story for another time!" "It's another time now. Would you shut up and listen? AS I WAS SAYING. Nick crawled into my bed to crash. I was still all hopped up on--" "--growing a magic dick--" Lisa interrupted. "Yes, that, so I couldn't sleep. And here's this jerk, rolling off the top of me and going to sleep, like we're not still at my birthday party, that he was throwing for me. And me--"

"Still hard as a rock I bet. You are now, just thinking about it." Jess folded her hands in her lap and glowered at the other girl. She was mortified at having it noticed, but she was also privately pleased at the sensation of the fabric wrapped around her member and this girl's rapt, wide-eyed attention on her. Lisa's t-shirt hung loose at the neck, revealing a freckled shoulder and a hint of cleavage, fresh-baked brown from the warm summer sun. Jess had a brief flash from the end-of-the-year party, where she was pretty sure she'd heard Lisa getting nailed in the next room. She swallowed and tried to continue with the story.

"Yeah, so he's in my bed, still naked. Nodding off. I climb in behind him, my naked and wet flesh pressed against his. And I'm just laying there, freaking out. Because I want to do stuff to him so bad, but he's asleep. It would be wrong. It would somehow be wrong, mere minutes after he made me shoot cum on my own face." "And then he rolls over, next to me. He paws at my boobs, and he grabs my dick. My magic cake dick, and he, like, slurs "let's do this." That's consent, right? If somebody grabs your dick and you can still taste their cum--" Jess stopped to hit Lisa with a pillow, both because Lisa was making a face and because she hoped it would start an impromptu wrestling match-- "they want to fuck you, no ifs ands or buts. Well, butts, yes."'

"So I get up close to him and start spooning him. I get in close and nibble on his ear. He moans and scootches back into me, which kind of freaks me out. I back up, and sit on the edge of the bed. That's when I see it: my bottle of lube, peeking out from underneath by dresser. Well then! The universe couldn't send a clearer signal if I'd somehow already slathered my whole dick in lube. Which, by that point, I had."

Lisa was leaning forward in the bed, jaw hanging open, eyes wide. "So... what happened then?"

"Well, I fucked him in the ass."

"What? That's how you're going to end the story? Five pages of describing your emotional state and my sexy-ass body and you're not going to describe in tender loving detail the sensation of buttfucking some boy you like?"

"Fine. Bitch." Jess reached into her night stand and pulled out a badly depleted bottle of vintage lubricant called Afro-glide and showed it to Lisa. She suspected it might actually be a hair care product from the 70s, but it still made penetration easier and it smelled the best. Once she'd just stuffed the bottle in herself, opened the cap, and did kagels. When she'd cum the lube had squirted out of the bottle and the whole room smelled like sex coconuts.

"So I get back to nibbling on his ear. And I'm naked behind him, just achingly stiff. I want to fuck him so bad, and my hands are soaked with lube. So I start doing that thing. What's it called, you know, where you reach around the guy so you can jerk his dick from behind while your boobs are resting gently on his back? Anyway, so I'm doing that and he starts backing up into me. I'm still freaked out, so I keep backing up."

"Pussy."

"You can't call me that anymore. I have a big fat cock now. Haven't you been paying attention? Whatever, do you want me to finish the story? Fucking right you do. So there's my dick, in the crack of his butt, and he turns his head around and he looks me in the eye, and he says "Come one! Fuck me already!" in this lusty, sexy voice. I'm almost Tom Sawyered his back

"First of all, never ever make that metaphor again. In fact, no more metaphors, ever. We can just be done with those. Second of all, don't stop." Jess noticed that Lisa's hand was resting gently on her inner thigh.

"Well, I started pushing my dick against him, and he starts grinding on me. I find his hole, and my dick starts sliding in. I swear angels started singing, and I forgave every single guy who ever tried to put so much as a sly glance in my butt. He gives this low groan, and picture the sexiest fucking thing you've ever done. Barebacking a guy you just met while he offers to do your laundry. Sex in the back of a convertible, but with the sort of guy that doesn't think that's cool. Picturing that? Now multiply it by David Bowie going down on Freddy Mercury."

"I think I just came a little."

"And then... and then I started to pull out."

"Yeah, I did. Right in my shorts."

"Me sliding out of his tight, virgin ass makes up for so much missed sex I think I can now legally claim that I lost my virginity at age eight. And then I start going back in again. And now we have a rhythm going, and I'm just whispering every dirty thing I can think of, the kind of thing I don't even want to repeat to myself and he's kind of moaning, and through a mouthful of pillow he's just kind of chanting "fuck my ass". I can feel his back on my nipples, just gently grazing them. And I can feel it. That feeling at the base of my balls that says that I'm about to cum."

"Like I just did, a second ago."

"I'm trying to make noises to tell him. And then he just pops my dick out of him and rolls over, and pulls me on top of him, and starts sucking me off! His dick is hard, and it's slapping me right in the face, so I start sucking it, and I can feel it getting hard. And then, just when I think I can't stand it any more, he grabs my ass with both hands and drags my whole length into his mouth. Look at my dick! It's like seven inches long, and he deep throats it like he's the king of cock gobblers. The moment that happens, we spunk simultaneously into each other's mouths." "When I look down at him, there's a line of saliva connecting my shaft to his lips, and he looks me in the eyes, and he swallows it, and winks."

Jess sat for a moment, caught in the memory of that post-coital reverie, her hand half outstretched. She let it drop, then looked at Lisa, who was biting her lip gently. Jess' eyes traveled down to Lisa's hands, in her lap, where her shorts were pulled to the side, revealing a glistening, luscious pussy.

Surprised, she looked in Lisa's eyes, as Lisa mouthed one thing.

"Fuck me."