tagSci-Fi & FantasyGendermorph Pt. 01: Discovering The Girl

Gendermorph Pt. 01: Discovering The Girl

byphoenixxrose©

The first part of my new Gendermorph Series is finally edited and ready! Would love to hear any comments or ideas as I'm new to writing more fantasy based stuff. Enjoy!

*****

"That sounds like fun." I was only half paying attention to the conversation at this point, she had a tendency to ramble once things had turned to a topic she enjoyed talking about.

"Oh it was! I haven't felt that young in a long time!"

It had become a bit of a stale routine, my fortnightly visits. Of course I loved her, and she always had the best stories, but recently I was always in my head too much to be good company to anyone.

"What's wrong, dear? You don't seem like yourself today." No shit Grandma, I haven't felt like 'myself' for as long as I can remember.

"What? Oh, sorry. It's nothing important." I brushed off her enquiry.

"I know what it is," she said with a twinkle in her eye, "you're getting to that age."

"What age?" I thought I knew what she was implying but I really didn't want to have this talk with my Grandma, no matter how relaxed or cool she was.

"Oh, you know, the curious age. Do I like girls? Do I like boys? Am I too feminine? Will I ever get laid and lose my virginity?" she giggled to herself as she spoke the last few words.

I couldn't verbalise a response, looking quickly at my feet and then to the open window. I was super embarrassed at how well she could read me but also didn't have the heart to tell her I lost my virginity in an awkward drunken encounter years ago. I was nearly twenty two now although I think she frequently and conveniently forgot the fact when it suited her.

"Your father was the same at your age," she continued, aware of my embarrassment but wanting to console and comfort me at the same time, "you look like him when he was your age-thin, scruffy and a little bit more feminine than your friends." I reacted badly to this accurate observation and fixed her with a defiant look. "It bothers you a bit, doesn't it dear?"

"Yes." I mumbled.

She was dead on the money. My physique and countenance were definitely more feminine than most guys. I'd tried everything I could to be more masculine but I wasn't any good at sports and it seemed almost impossible for me to put on any weight or muscle no matter how hard I trained at the gym. I was also into a lot of 'girly things' like art, poetry and fashion and I didn't have many male friends. I think most of the friends I had who were girls had assumed I was gay and I hadn't done anything to discourage it. Although the couple of times I'd managed to see any of them in any state of undress had resulted in an instant erection and a frenzied night of masturbating to the image I'd seen in my mind but I'd never let them know it.

I'd also lost my virginity to a girl and had been lucky enough to get laid a couple of times. I definitely thought of myself as straight as I'd never had any homosexual experiences. It didn't stop me thinking about it occasionally, fantasising about it sporadically and masturbating over some 'less than heterosexual' pornography, though. I think shemales in particular were one of my dark fetishes I'd never admit to anyone-how such feminine physiques could support such big, thick cocks and look both sexy and masculine at the same time would always fill my mind with lusty fantasies and result in a feverish, guilt ridden wank.

Why should I feel so guilty? Well, my family was quite conservative. My dad had abandoned my mom, my sister Dana and me when I was young and it had left me without a strong male figure to show me what it meant to 'be a man.' It also meant I was in the dark regarding a lot of things, sexually, so when I had thoughts which strayed from the norm I always felt they must be wrong-no matter how 'right' or good it felt at the time of having them.

My mother never really had the 'talk' with me and I don't think she had with my nineteen year old sister either. As a result I think we both were finding our own way through the minefield of sexual discovery during puberty and we had a good relationship with each other-we could chat about anything at all without embarrassment. I still didn't trust her enough to let her know I'd snuck into her room and worn her panties a couple of times when she was out, though. I was far too ashamed to admit when I looked at my reflection looking pretty and feminine it turned me on so much-the sensation of the girly material against my body meant I would instantly have to wank myself off into the silky material. I would then have to throw the soiled garment into her laundry hamper and pray she didn't see the dried up white cum stains or wonder if she'd actually worn that pair at all. Fortunately she was messy as hell and I don't think she ever noticed.

It wasn't something I did often, more if the opportunity presented itself and I was feeling more girly than usual. Unfortunately this was happening more often these days and it didn't help as she got older her selection of underwear was getting sexier!

I think that's why my Grandma's comments rattled me more than they should have-the frequency of my little 'sessions' was increasing and I was finding more and more elaborate ways to explore my body. I'd already discovered my prostate with some internet research and a lot of vaseline and it had resulted in some amazing, if confusing, orgasms. After that I'd even purchased a butt plug which had been used many times. Was I just a girly kind of guy or was I actually gay?

"This might give you a few answers to your questions." My Grandma had been to her nightstand and brought back an ornate looking beaded bracelet. I was so lost in my own thoughts I hadn't seen her leave her chair or approach me.

"What...what is it?" I asked, taking the item from her outstretched hand. I inspected it closely, running my fingers over the ornate, detailed engravings covering every jade green bead.

"It'll help you do things you've always been able to do but never known how." Was her cryptic reply and she smiled warmly. My dumbfounded expression must have told her I needed more of an explanation. "You can do so much more than you think," she continued, putting her hand against my cheek affectionately, "you need to stop worrying so much or thinking too much. Just enjoy what your body can do. The bracelet will help. You don't have to wear it if you don't want to, dear. Just take it home with you."

"Thank you." 
"Now, surely you've got better things to do than listen to me tell you about my Salsa dancing! Get out there and have fun!" She finished her sentence with a dramatic flourish of her arms and practically 'shooed' me from her room.

"Okay. I'll see you in a couple of weeks, Gran. Thanks for the bracelet." I called back at her once I'd reached the doorframe of her room. She smiled at me with a subtle head nod as if she knew much more than she was letting on. It wasn't a sneaky smile, more of a comforting one as if she knew some of my problems were about to be gone. Or at least confronted head on.

****

On the bus ride home my mind was buzzing-was she right? Would this simple trinket give me any of the answers I was seeking? I turned the bracelet round and round through my fingers and stared out of the window into the night-my reflection staring back at me every time the bus passed an area without lights. Who was I? It's obviously a question scholars, philosophers and people generally much smarter than me have wrestled with and failed but I had a burning need to figure it out through some serious self exploration-sexual and otherwise.

"Hi, mom." I called out slightly breathlessly as I shut the front door behind me-doing the twenty minute walk from where the bus dropped me off in only ten minutes catching up with me.

"How's your Gran?" she asked from the kitchen.

"She's great. Wouldn't stop talking about some new salsa dancing courses she's been doing."

"Ha! Same old Gran, she's never shown any signs of stopping or slowing down!" I walked into the kitchen and picked at the vegetables she was preparing for a casserole. "Hey! There'll be none left if you eat it all now! It'll be ready in less than an hour. Go get some of your assignments out of the way while you're waiting-you know they've been building up." I nodded in agreement. It was annoying when she tried to be controlling but she was right. All the time I was wasting researching 'gender identity' and 'sexuality' on the internet was eating into my studying time to the point where it was starting to get on top of me.

I acquiesced and slunk upstairs to my room, passing by my sister's open door on the way. She was sat cross-legged on her bed, her face lit up by the screen of her laptop.

"Hi, sis." I called out and knocked lightly on the wood of her door frame.

"Shit! What? Oh, sorry you startled me." she replied and hurriedly closed her laptop. My interest was piqued.

"What were you looking at just then?" I teased "something you shouldn't have been?" She shot me a her typical sarcastic response-puckering her lips and tilting her head.

"Ha ha, very funny. Don't you have studying to do? Denise said you're way behind on your work." Denise was a bit older than my sister but they were still firm friends. Sometimes I think my sister was just using her to get into bars and clubs to chat up guys or maybe so she had someone to spy on me-like now.

"Denise should mind her own business." I spat haughtily.

"But she's right though?" she answered with a knowing look.

"Yes. I'm heading to do them right now. Go back to your porn or whatever the hell you were doing before I caught you."

"Ha ha." Again that same petulant look I knew so well returned.

I spent the rest of the evening in my room, both before and after dinner, trying to focus and catch back up with my studies that apparently everyone knew I was behind on. It wasn't easy but I was pleased with the fact I hadn't given in to my urges to check any social networks, get sucked into looking at cute animal videos or browse some smut. Or researching the bracelet Grandma had given me-I was particularly proud I hadn't tried to find any Wikipedia entries or anything relating to it even though questions were still rattling around my mind.

I'd worked longer than I wanted to and should've been asleep hours ago but I went to bed feeling a bit better about everything and my entire body was heavy and sleepy by the time my head hit the pillow. I picked my phone up to set an alarm and noticed something glowing out of the corner of my eye. Was it the bracelet? I'd cast it aside onto my desk in an effort to not think about it but here it was now possibly glowing softly and demanding attention.

I forced myself to get out of bed to investigate but as I got closer the light seemed to get dimmer and fade away. I picked it up and turned it around in my hand, running my fingers over every bead and inspecting it's shape closely. Nothing. Must have been imagining it. I was super tired, I reasoned and returned back to my comfy bed-bringing the bracelet with me and placing it on my bedside table. I checked my alarm once again. It informed me I'd only get six and a half hours sleep before I needed to be up for College. I groaned in disappointment and pulled the covers around me, determined to get as much of those six and a half hours in quality sleep as I could.

****

I was roused from a deep sleep a few hours later covered in a light sheen of sweat and confusing feelings radiating from between my legs. It wasn't so much a sensation of arousal as it was more of a warm, pulsing throb. As I became more aware of it, it continued to build into a dull ache travelling from my crotch to my stomach in tight knots. I pressed my hands into the area to try and ease the pain, moaning pathetically to myself as I did. Unexpectedly my palms struck against an impossibly large and angry erection, hovering above my abdomen and demanding attention.

It was slick with precum and the pool gathered at the tip suggested I'd been leaking for some time. The entire length prickled and hummed with an overpowering charge and as soon as my fingers glanced into it I groaned loudly with desire. My right hand wrapped itself around the shaft and unconsciously began pumping up and down, delirious with primal urges in my half asleep state. My other hand drifted towards my balls and felt each one in turn, marvelling at just how heavy with lust they were-it was the kind of build up I had when I hadn't 'taken care of business' for a few weeks but I'd had a wank only two nights ago. Catching a glimpse of my friend Lorna's white panties as she bent over to put petrol in her car whilst wearing a short skirt being the catalyst for that frantic session.

My fingers travelled further below, gently caressing underneath my balls and lazily running my fingers up and down the sensitive area above my ass. I wasn't sure if I was in the mood to penetrate myself or if I was too sleepy to try and locate any lube so I toyed with my tight entrance with slow, deliberate movements without entering it.

I decided my ass wasn't particularly hungry tonight but in my half asleep state I knew I needed more than just the fist pumping up and down my hard shaft to get me off. Instinct took over and I pushed my fingers harder into my perineum and I was surprised at how wet it was-the area was soaked with sweat and I'd only just started pleasuring myself. The pleasure coming from this previous undiscovered erogenous zone was exquisite and I gasped loudly as little tingles of electricity prickled with life throughout my skin. It was like the first time I'd ever masturbated all over again and I couldn't get enough of it.

I pressed harder into the seam of skin there and made small circles as if I was teasing a pussy. My other hand continued pumping away at my thick cock and small beads of sweat formed on my forehead as the effort of both hands raised my temperature higher. I thrashed around and kicked the bed covers from my body frantically, sighing contentedly once the cool air hit me.

The sweat was really pouring from me down below and my fingers were slick with moisture. I pushed harder to gain purchase and create friction and, to my surprise, the flesh yielded-my fingers met with no resistance and melted into me as if my skin were made of marshmallow. They travelled inside me for a inch or two before I became aware of what was happening-my mind a mixture of fear and pure, primal lust.

My fingers were inside of me! This couldn't be right. Skin should be there. Muscle and ligaments should be there. But they weren't. As my fingers continued their journey I could feel labia forming around the outside of the opening. Panic gripped me as a tight, hot ball in my stomach and I quickly withdrew my fingers, accompanied by a vulgar slurping sound.

"What the..." I asked the empty space of the room before the sensation of my fingers passing over my freshly formed clit took the air from my lungs and caused me to twitch and pump a small amount of precum from the tip of my straining shaft.

I was still not fully awake or understood what was happening between my legs but now my fingers were no longer inside of me I felt empty-I needed them inside of me again. I ran my fingertips around the entire area as if I was reading braille and opened my legs slightly to aid my self exploration. Everything was there. Outer labia, inner lips and a clitoris protruding proudly and demanding my attention, aching to be touched.

I teased my the small bump with light movements and a rocket of pure sexual ecstasy shot throughout me. My hips surged upwards and I let go of both sets of genitals as I gripped the bed with my hands.

"Fuck me..." I sighed in disbelief at the sheer amount of feelings overwhelming my body. My hips lowered as I came down from the crest of the wave of bliss rocking throughout me. I gingerly snaked both hands toward my new hole and let my thighs fall open even wider, my touch becoming bolder by the second. I touched every bump, fold and crevice. Yep, there was definitely a fully formed pussy there. And she was hungry.

All fear of my body's unexpected and unexplained transformation had vanished-the erotic mist in my mind clouding all reasonable judgement and thoughts. I had only one goal-to quell the fire of lust at my centre radiating from the inside of my cunt and thrumming it's way to the tip of my cock.

With one hand I held myself open as I pushed two fingers inside my soaking wet folds in a similar way I'd done to girlfriends in the past. I hooked my fingers upwards, desperate to find out if I had a g-spot inside of me. My fingertips danced around inside my new tender flesh and I was lost in a sea of unfamiliar new pleasures. Sure, I'd had my ass penetrated before but it had never felt like this. Like every inch of my soft internal walls were on fire. I panted, gasped and shook my head from side to side in disbelief at how much enjoyment my own fingers were supplying me.

Then I found it. I did have a g-spot! I pushed my fingers forcefully into the spongy mound and my hips instinctively rocked in time with their movements, causing my forgotten erection to slap noisily against my abdomen. It left a small pool of precum every time it made contact and it made me feel even dirtier, prompting me to increase my efforts to pull an orgasm from my desperate cunt.

I pulled at my g-spot harder and harder, faster and faster until there was a distinct amount of pressure where my bladder was. I had a brief moment where I contemplated grabbing a towel I was so unsure of how my new body was going to react but no force on Earth could pull my fingers away from my centre of lust. Instead, I embraced the feeling and let my other hand let go of my lips and stray towards my engorged clit.

Both hands were soon a blur as I fought to reach my goal. Sweat was covering my entire body in a light sheen from the energy I was exuding and I fought to concentrate on the sensations I was experiencing. My mind was battling my body as I was desperate to come but seemed unable to tip myself over the edge. Was this how hard it was to make a pussy come? I suddenly had a great deal more respect for women and began muttering to the empty room all sorts of things in a bid to ride the crest of this wave of bliss to it's inevitable climax. But I remained stubbornly on the edge of an orgasm, my body refusing to let me have the release I craved.

"C'mon, you dirty bitch! Come! Come!" I wasn't sure if I was calling myself or my brand new body part a dirty bitch but hearing the words out loud had an immediate effect and my body twitched as the words left my mouth and hit my ears. I increased my efforts and pushed my fingers at my g-spot harder till my forearm ached with the repetitive movements.

"Nearly...almost..." I hissed as the pleasure slowly built to the point of no return. I panted and thrust my hips desperately until the feeling inside of me burned with such warmth it radiated to every cell in my body, lighting up previously undiscovered parts in my brain. It was as if I was lifting above the bed a few inches and floating in a black sea of oblivion where there was no past or future, only the present moment and the bliss I was experiencing overwhelmed my world.

Then it hit. It arrived with such ferocity my eyes were thrown open from the surprise and the sight of my bedroom ceiling was brought sharply into focus for a second before I briefly lost consciousness. I was coming. This was finally my release. I twitched, spasmed and convulsed violently, my legs drawing up to my chest as I gasped loudly. The intensity was crashing over me in waves and I wondered when it would stop. But, unlike the orgasms I'd experienced in the past, my body kept going. No diminishing of how horny I was. No body parts to tired to continue. In fact, looking down at my cock, it was still as hard as a rock and hadn't ejaculated yet.

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