Getting What I Deserved

"Yeah."

"Do you have any experience?"

"No. But I'm a fast learner."

Good enough for me.

"Can you meet me tomorrow at noon?"

"Sure."

I gave her the address. "Oh, and Ellie, if you have any other friends who might be interested, you can bring them too. I think I'm going to be needing four total."

"OK. Bye."

Ellie showed up the next day, looking only more gorgeous than ever. Her makeup accentuated her large green eyes, her short hair accentuated her pixie-like face, and she had an extra button undone on her top to make sure I knew that she had breasts that were perfection itself. And she brought along one friend, a girl named Shawna, who I knew only vaguely. Shawna was pretty too, though not in Ellie's league. I interviewed them separately.

I found out from Ellie that her stepfather wanted the whole family to move to San Francisco, and she didn't want to go. He was also forcing her to go to the University of Missouri, his alma mater, even though she had no interest in going there. She said she was hoping this job could pay her enough so that she could stay in town, support herself, and take a year off before starting college, someplace else. For some other interviewer, this might have been too much information. But I lapped every word of hers up. I totally agreed with everything she was saying. I told her she was hired, and also told her that I couldn't guarantee how much she'd be able to make from tips. But I told her what my business plan was, and that if it worked out, she'd be able to make around $800 a week. I felt a little nervous saying that, because it sounded like a stretch. But her eyes went wide when I said that.

"Really, Griffey? Because that would be great!"

Oh my god, she said my name.

I hired Shawna too. It seemed good business sense to hire beautiful, young, sexy women to be your waitstaff, no? And Ellie then sent me two more of her friends, because if that $800 a week turned out to be real, it would be 50-100% more than they'd earn at other jobs scooping ice cream or manning the cash register at a store. I only hired one of them, Jonelle, a black girl I had been in math class for two years with. I also hired Barbara, a 39-year-old woman who I found on craigslist. She had been a waitress for seventeen years, and I figured it would be wise to have someone with actual experience.

The restaurant ate up so much of my time and energy, when I came home, mom was usually asleep, and I was too tired to fuck anyway. Plus, I noticed I wasn't even interested in her anymore. I was fantasizing about Ellie and Shawna. And Jonelle and even Barbara, though I couldn't figure that one out as she was nowhere near as cute or sexy as the others. But there was something about her that was intriguing, including the idea that she was just untouchable to me.

We opened for a week without making ourselves known. We were only open for friends, or people we knew, plus their friends as well. This way we could work out any kinks before they could come back to haunt us. And there were plenty of kinks, especially in getting food delivered to the table promptly, and getting restocked efficiently.

But we were a hit. The food could be better, I know. Sometimes it was really good, and sometimes it was only OK. I needed to work on how to be more consistent. But we always got good marks for having a good vibe, and people said they didn't want to leave, and wanted to come back soon. And our surveys were pretty clear on why this was: Ellie, Shawna, Jonelle and Barbara. Soon after we opened, I needed to hire another waiter, it became clear, and smartly I picked up another handsome young guy. His name was Julio, and he was 26. He was the counterpart to all the beautiful, young women. Female customers liked him, and the male customers didn't mind him, but still looked forward to the next time their regular waitress stopped by.

Two weeks after the restaurant opened, I was closing up on Friday, and Ellie hung around late too. "Go home," I told her. "I'll finish up here."

"I can help."

"OK." I started putting the chairs up on the tables. "What's up?

"Nothing."

"C'mon, you can tell me." I had tried encouraging chitchat between me and Ellie a lot. And with the others, so as not to seem too obvious, or like I was playing favorites. But I had never gotten much past the state of the weather with any of them, except for Barbara who was very chatty, and tended to run on at the mouth.

"You know, my boyfriend broke up with me last week."

"I didn't know. I didn't even know that you had a boyfriend. Although I would have guessed that you did. I mean, you're just..."

"Actually, I broke up with him. He was a no-good, dirty liar."

"Sorry to hear that."

"He was 32."

"Years old?"

"Are you shocked?"

"Very little shocks me."

"He had a nice car."

"Is that what you liked about him?"

"Pretty much. He could buy me things."

"Sure."

"But he was also a creep."

"Yeah. You want a drink?"

"Absolutely."

I went into the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels. We didn't have a liquor license yet, but I used the JD in our barbecue sauce.

"Should we just stay here, or go find a place?"

"Here is good."

We sat and talked for hours, eventually finishing the bottle. I don't know if it was hormones or the alcohol, or the long-term attraction, but I was in love. Ellie told me a lot about herself. She was a mess. I had no idea. She had no self-esteem. She went out with rich, older losers who could buy her things. She didn't respect them and she didn't respect herself. I told her all the bad things about myself, just to show I wasn't any better. We both cried. And then we started kissing. Oh man, that was great.

Before you knew it, it was four in the morning. I thought we might head to her house or my house to finish in some hot sex, but she put the brakes on. I drove her home, despite feeling pretty drunk, and dropped her off. I was extra careful on the road so as not to be pulled over. And she didn't even give me one more kiss good night, but that was OK. I went home, and collapsed in bed, and fell asleep, my hard-on in my hand. When the alarm woke me up two hours later, I considered having a quick bout with mom, but decided against. I had a girlfriend, I thought, and didn't want to mess it up by immediately being unfaithful.

I was wondering if things would be awkward with Ellie the next day, but she just came in regular, said thanks for last night that was great, and went on her day like usual. And I tried to act normal too, which wasn't hard considering how busy we were. At the end of the day, I asked Ellie if she wanted to talk more, but she said she needed some sleep. I knew what she meant, so I asked if she wanted to go on a date on Monday, when we both had off. She said that would be nice. I was in seventh heaven.

Without even thinking about it, I told mom that I had a girlfriend now, and that I wasn't going to be using her for sex for a while. I thought she'd be happy for me, and happy for herself, now that I wasn't going to be on top of her all the time. Instead, we got into the weirdest fight. She called me selfish and I didn't care about anything or anybody. I didn't get it, until it finally dawned on me that she felt rejected. And scared I'd leave her again.

"Is that it, mom? You think I have no feelings for you?"

She nodded, tears in her eyes.

"Mom, I love you, and I hate you. And that's the way you feel about me too, right?"

She nodded, slowly.

"So this is going to be good for both of us. It'll give us a chance to figure out what we really want and how we feel. I think a cooling off period will help us both grow. I can date. You can date, too."

"I don't want to date, Griffey."

"It would be good for you, mom. Look at you. You're looking better than you have in 20 years. You've lost weight. Your posture is better. Your skin is better. You're happier. I think guys should be showing up on your doorstep pretty quickly."

"Actually, several guys have tried asking me out. I just said no."

"Why'd you say that?"

"Because I didn't want to lead anyone on while I was having an affair with you."

"Oh. That's very nice, mom."

And then she kissed me, hard on the mouth. It was shocking, really. She had never kissed me before with such a sense of passion and need. At first, I was a little repulsed, but then I got into it. I kissed her back, and she practically threw herself on me. I felt like she was gluing her face onto mine, trying to suck my tongue right into the back of her mouth.

"Come on, Griffey. Let's go to my room."

A small part of me was saying not to. I wanted to be true to Ellie. But I justified it by saying we hadn't even really started dating yet. That would be two more days.

"One last time, mom."

"Right, son. Hurry."

We raced to her room, and threw off our clothes. Mom lay back on the bed, spread-eagle. "Just get inside me, Griffey, right now." I was hard, and she was wet. She lay on top of her, and I enjoyed that still delicious feeling of entering my mom's pussy. This was another position we rarely did, and never before had she clung to me so much. Her breasts were mashed into my chest. We kissed for a long time, and she banged down as hard on me as I did up at her. She pulled her face off mine, as an orgasm blew through her. She started with a guttural moan, and moved up the scale into a keening wail. I exploded into her after she started give off short yelps, thrashing her head.

After we calmed down a bit, I looked down on her, and summed up: "Wow."

"You're an amazing lover, Griffey. I'll never find another as good as you."

"Thanks, mom. You're amazing, too. I don't know how much of the excitement is due to the forbiddenness of the incest. And I'm concerned that I'll never have it as good with anyone else too. But we have to try."

She nodded.

"Griffey, are you still hard?"

I was still inside her, and hard. "You know it, Mom."

"Keep moving a little bit, OK?"

"Like this?" I pulled in and out a little.

"Nnnnnnnn." She squeezed her cuntal muscles. That always got my attention.

"I thought that was our last time."

"Is that what I said?"

"I thought you agreed."

"Well, maybe this is still our last time."

"One fast, one slow?"

"Nnnn."

"Is there anything else you'd like?"

"Anything you like."

"I have a favorite position we've never done."

"Tell me," I said, intrigued.

"Scoot over here, with your head by the base of the bed." I turned the 180, keeping myself fully in her.

"Back up, and put your feet on the wall." We squunched up, and I did as she said. She was riding tall on my dick. I saw that my putting my feet on the wall, it raised the contact point between our groins. Now I was really fucking up, In a good way.

Mom started slow undulations of her hips. Her full-size breasts hung down like tantalizing fruit in front of me. I grasped one, and started licking the aureole of the other. The nipple hardened, like a miniature penis, and I toyed with it in my mouth. Then I reversed, licking the other, and grasping the other tit. Mom kept giving contented sighs.

"You like fucking me, mom?"

"I love making love."

"With me, mom?"

"Yes."

"Say it."

"I love making love with you."

"Son."

"Griffey."

"I'm so glad you've made me fuck you all this time. Say it, mom."

"There were times I hated it, Griffey. But now I'm glad."

I interlocked our hands, and then pushed her up so she was in an upright position, still riding my cock. Inspired, I then raised my knees so she really was riding in mid-air. She gawped for a moment at the new position.

I marveled at the sight of my mother, naked as the day she was born, riding my cock. I looked up at her swinging breasts, and face suffused with sexual ecstasy. If you had been there, you wouldn't have believed it. For me, it was the top, the most amazing thing ever. We fucked like animals, or movie stars, I don't know. It was pure sex, made impure by the beastliness of our relationship. She sailed to another orgasm, and then collapsed on me. I kept pistoning, and joined in in orgasm a moment later, as I desperately stuck my tongue into her receptive mouth.

"Am I crushing you?" she wondered after.

"Not at all."

"That was a good one, for our last one."

"Yes, indeed. For a while there, I felt like I could fuck you forever. That I could die happy in your pussy."

"Amazing. That's how I felt."

And that was our last time together. Except, of course, that it wasn't.

I started dating Ellie. It was great, except for one thing. Mom hated me dating. She never put it in words, but living with her quickly became intolerable. She was on my case every second. So I basically stopped going home. I had a little office in the back of the restaurant, and I slept there. I went home to take showers and get fresh clothes, and that was about it. I made sure only to go home when no one was going to be there. Mom tried calling and dropping in on me, and I made excuses to avoid her or get away as soon as possible.

I had no confidence in my ability to date Ellie, because I thought I was a broken-down miserable excuse for a human being, and she'd see that and head for the hills. But, as it turned out, she was a broken-down miserable excuse for a human being too, and we needed each other. She had been sexually abused at home for years. And it was by nearly everyone, too—her dad, her stepdad, her brother, her stepbrother, her two cousins, and even her mom. There was no intercourse, but there was a lot of inappropriate touching and nudity and commentary. From the time she reached puberty, she was the object of desire. She recognized she had encouraged it in some ways, because there was no love in her family, and sex was the one way she could get attention and praise.

I did a lot of listening and sympathizing. And thinking, "Oh. My. God." Her family made mine look functional in comparison. I didn't think that was possible.

We didn't really go on dates. In our free time, we just hung around together and talked. Mostly, she talked. She needed someone to tell her story to, and I was the lucky recipient. Actually, I did love hearing her stories, because she was so beautiful and sexy and I felt very special that she shared with me. But I was also uncomfortable, because I knew I couldn't touch her. She made that clear the first time I tried to give her a hug to say I understood, and she wrenched away like I had tried to rape her.

During all this time, I didn't tell her about me and mom. I hinted that I understood what she was saying because I had kinda been there myself in a similar situation, but not the same. She didn't ask, possibly because she felt that would be rude, or maybe she felt I'd tell her when I was ready. Actually, what was most likely is she didn't ask was because she didn't really care to know at that point. She needed to tell her story and didn't want to be interrupted. And because she was so damaged and generally mistrustful that she didn't care about other people much at all. But I'd find that out later.

Eventually I was able to explain to her that hearing her bare her soul and not being able to touch her was very difficult for me, and she understood. We went slow, and it took like a month, which felt like an eternity, but she eventually allowed me to make love to her. It was spectacular. Afterwards, I cried.

Ellie wondered what that was all about, and I told her she was the second person I had ever had sex with. And that the first person was my mother. At the moment, she held me as I cried, and acted very loving. But the next day, she said she thought we should have some time apart. Part of me understood that there were two reasons for this--her letting me go all the way with her, and my admission of having had incestuous relations—but I focused mostly on the second reason as I blamed myself for ruining everything.

We didn't talk for two weeks, except for during work hours, when she skillfully avoided me. Finally I cornered her and pleaded for half an hour so we could just talk, and she agreed. After closing the restaurant, I was able to ask her what was going on with her, and she surprised the hell out of me by saying she felt scared that she was falling in love with me, and that she really didn't feel she was able to be in a relationship right then. And then she was amazed to hear that I felt that she must hate me, and how I hated myself for pushing her too hard and tell her things she couldn't stand to learn about me, and she swore up and down that wasn't it.

So we promised to give it another try, and I'd say the next two months of my life were the happiest I've ever been. We totally opened up to each other, had sex all the time, even though we didn't have a place of our own. I couldn't bring her home to my place, she couldn't bring me to her place, and my office wasn't big enough for us to sleep together. Luckily, she had a friend who had a room over the family garage, and we could use that space as much as we wanted.

And then, one day, it was over. Ellie just told me she couldn't keep going out with me. It was all her, she said. But I was too intense.

Maybe I was. I was 18, what did I know about dating a girl my own age? Especially a messed up one like Ellie, and with me so messed up as well. I said I understood, because at least in part I did. I couldn't explain it out loud, but I was just totally unsurprised. The sex was surprisingly not good, and we were having trouble with honesty. She asked if it was OK if she kept working at the restaurant, and I said of course, even though that was awkward too. But we stayed out of each other's ways, and we made it work.

I moved back home. It was good sleeping in my own bed again. Or just a real bed, just by itself.

The next morning was a Sunday, and I decided to sleep in. I staggered downstairs around noon. Mom was already dressed.

"Griffey, you're back!'

"Yeah."

"What's up?"

"Nothing."

"You want to talk about it?"

"No."

"I'm going out with Wilver."

"Who's Wilver?"

"You don't know him. I have a boyfriend."

"Good for you." I poured some coffee and started to look at my cereal choices. Rice Krispies or

Special K. Some choice.

"We've been going out for a month now."

"Mmpf."

"Are you moving back in for regular now?"

"Looks like it."

"I'm having sex with Wilver."

"OK."

"I don't want to be unfaithful to him. He's being a real gentleman. Treating me nice."

"No worries. I just want a quiet place to be for a while. The restaurant is really taking a lot out of me."

"Then I'm going to go."

"Bye. Have a good time." I poured myself a bowl of half Rice Krispies and half Special K, and didn't even look up as she walked out.

I vegged out for a while, then went to the office to pay some bills and clear up some paperwork. I took some left over bbq back, even though I couldn't stand to eat it any more. But when Mom returned, and Drieka made an appearance, they were really glad to have some. I settled for some frozen mac and cheese I found in the fridge.

Later, I told Mom about Ellie and me. She made some noises about being sorry. Then she told me about Wilver, and it seemed clear he was a total loser. After four dates, the closest physical contact they had came when he kissed her hand once, and once when he touched her boob when he stumbled, and which caused him such embarrassment he had to go home.

We looked at one another.

"What do you think you need right now?" Mom asked.

"I could use a hug. How about you?"

"I could use a good fuck. But not with you."

"Right, a good fuck. But not with you." I imitated her a bit, just to be mean. But she took it as a jest.