Girl Unveiled

When people see her, they see a strong, successful, persevering young adult that has done well in the shadow of a rocky past. Sometimes, she likes to think that's what she is; other times, she feels as if she has let down the image that everyone so strongly believes in. It is the fear that she struggles with each and every day.

She is a small town girl. She grew up in the heart of the Midwest in a small, white house on Second Street. She was raised by her mother and grandma (who she calls Granny). Her dad was never around. He was in jail when she was born and he was never around much when she was little. He tried to tell her it was because her mom wouldn't let him see her -- which is most likely the case. Her town was small, but cozy. She shared a room with her mom. They sang songs together every night. It was so comforting to her; she couldn't sleep unless they had done their nightly routine verbatim. Her mom always taught her how to be sweet and kind. She was her best friend, but also her worst enemy at times. She and her mom moved around a lot. Her mom was 32 years old when they moved out of her Granny's house. They moved to different towns nearby. She loved it just being her and her mom. They were so close, and life was sweet.

She was always a really good student in school. Her mom encouraged good grades, but never had to push her. She was always an Honor Roll student and always had a lot of friends. She was always involved with activities in school. When she got into high school, she was around family friends. Her uncle worked at the high school and she was surrounded family and family friends. She had to be on extra good behavior because her English teacher might be at the summer barbeque at her aunt and uncle's house. It was a good life. She had lots of friends, and was surrounded by people that cared about her. She may not have understood it or thought it was great at the time, but when she looks back -- she sees it was really a wonderful way to grow up.

When she was sixteen years old, her and her mom decided to go visit their friends that had moved down South. They fell in love with the change that the trip brought. They loved being around their friends again, and felt like it could be a new start. They came back home, and her mom started making plans for the move. That was January. On her birthday the next month, her mom left to start a life for them. She moved in with her aunt and uncle to finish her sophomore year in high school. It was awful. School was hard, and she had the typical social female dramas that tenth graders have. She missed her mom, and felt so uncomfortable in her aunt's house even though she had spent so much time growing up there. Her life took a turn for the worst. She started dating guys who left something to be desired in the romance department.

She got involved with drugs that no sixteen year old should even know exist. She was in an abusive relationship that seemed as if it was a deep, black hole that had no escape. She kept her grades up in school while maintaining an image of schoolgirl, athlete, homecoming queen, and good friend. She led an exhausting double life for a long time. She couldn't handle the strict rules of her aunt's house, so she moved in with her dad and his girlfriend for the first time in her life. Rules were nonexistent, and parenting didn't exist. She came and went as she pleased, and never had to explain herself. She would come in at night, walk past her father and "stepmother" sitting in her living room, and pass out in her bedroom -- if she came home at all.

She was in a new school, with new people. She didn't know anyone until she made a good friend. They went to a mutual friend's house one night and met a guy who would end up being the love of her life. That was four years ago -- they are still together and happy today. She went to a prestigious, private university for a semester but got very, very sick from birth control and almost died. She could not take her finals and failed out without any cooperation from the university. Her father does not support her at all, and hasn't since she moved in with him. She has done everything on her own with the help of her Granny. Her mom is across the country, her dad doesn't speak to her or help her in anyway, and she is a scared girl in a grown-up world. I suppose we all are like that sometimes. She has a hard time trusting people, and doesn't believe in herself. She has an inadequacy complex and feels insignificant sometimes. Her self-esteem and self-worth is in the dirt, but things are looking up for her.

She lives in a nice apartment with her fiancé and two cats, has a full-time job, and will be going back to school part-time soon. She wants the nice house, three kids, a cat, and a dog. She wants to be a loving wife and mother. She loves passion, intrigue, and expressing herself through writing and art. She has been through a lot in her life, but tries to remain centered and focused on the life she has dreamed of her entire life. Things get hard, but she keeps going...and she'll keep going until her dreams are realized.

If you know her...

You know me.